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Jay12
01-31-2015, 11:04 AM
. Maybe it is because I'm blond, and that is rare down there, I don't know. But as a guy, I loved it. :).

Blondes are not that rare in Mexico...or anywhere in Latin-America. The same with redheads.


I'm sure it gets old for women, but enjoy it while you can, or just tolerate it. This is a "problem" that will resolve itself automatically for you as you get older. You may miss it later when it stops. I was flattered though.

My mum is fat (mid 200's at 5'6") and will be 45 this summer, but she has a beautiful face...and she still gets hit on by dudes constantly. The catcalling has not stopped because of her age and plenty of extra weight (her extra weight primary consist of tits and ass more than gut). Y'all (men) need to understand that, for the most part, women will always have an easier time finding men...regardless of age and/or weight.

MyButter
02-19-2015, 08:18 AM
Have any of you seen the 'Adult Wednesday' series on youtube? There is an episode about street harassment and I loved the way she handled it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVO3sNcJ7A8

Likethis
02-20-2015, 12:35 PM
When I was younger, I went down to one of my company's plants in Mexico on business. It was a Friday, and the girls in the factory came into work all dressed up, so they could hit the bars as soon as they got off work. The factory was just light assembly. One of the pretty senioritas gave me a wolf whistle and a sexy smile as I walked by. Maybe it is because I'm blond, and that is rare down there, I don't know. But as a guy, I loved it. :)

I'm sure it gets old for women, but enjoy it while you can, or just tolerate it. This is a "problem" that will resolve itself automatically for you as you get older. You may miss it later when it stops. I was flattered though.

Wow maybe check your male privilege ok? Thanks.

I find it so fascinating when men, who know nothing of what it's like to live as a woman in this world, tell women how to react and feel about street harassment. Telling them they should enjoy unwanted comments or "just tolerate it", completely ignorant of how different the context is for women in a sexist world.

So fascinating really, I always wonder where this male entitlement comes from.

Like at what point in your life do you start to think it's perfectly fine to trivialize women's experiences (why the quotation marks, why "problem" instead of problem, did you even read the thread or the title? How can someone hating going outside because they'll be harassed not be a problem?), at what point do you start thinking it's perfectly fine to tell women they should enjoy or tolerate unwanted male attention as if that unwanted male attention is more valuable and more important than them feeling safe and respected in their everyday lives? (NEWSFLASH: male attention is pretty low value as most women can get it anytime they want with little to no effort, it's not like platinum or saffron it's just dick and it's everywhere.)

kaninchen
02-20-2015, 01:16 PM
(NEWSFLASH: male attention is pretty low value as most women can get it anytime they want with little to no effort, it's not like platinum or saffron it's just dick and it's everywhere.)

https://38.media.tumblr.com/b21bd5d700d800dac5531da51ac1a50b/tumblr_mjn0swhHT51qa5foho1_400.gif

Well... They can just shut down SW and we can all go home because you 100% slayed everything with this A+ valedictorian gem of a post.

wednesday86
02-20-2015, 01:42 PM
I only get cat calls in the ghetto, not ever in the suburbs. The worst I've gotten is "hey white girl" which just made me laugh. It takes a lot to offend me though. I know I turn heads but eh. It doesn't bother me. My husband gets pissed when men stare but I don't blame them. I know I'm cute and my hair is bright WHITE BLONDE, shining like the sun. Of course I stand out. I stare at cute guys, guys stare at me...it's whatever.

gameover
02-20-2015, 08:53 PM
I'm not trying to trivialize the fact that some women feel threatened by some of the attention they get from guys in public. I haven't seen the threatening types they have experienced, but I believe they have experienced it.

I was referring to the juvenile wolf whistle type of attention, which seems silly to me, but not threatening. I'm not referring to attention where the men are following the women, or making obscene comments. Anyone would feel threatened by that.

As an aside, it's kind of ironic that it is because men are such visual creatures that the less intellectual ones express their attraction by way of cat calls and wolf whistles. And yet it is that same visual trait of men that makes stripping a viable occupation.

whirlerz
02-20-2015, 09:09 PM
Wow maybe check your male privilege ok? Thanks.

I find it so fascinating when men, who know nothing of what it's like to live as a woman in this world, tell women how to react and feel about street harassment. Telling them they should enjoy unwanted comments or "just tolerate it", completely ignorant of how different the context is for women in a sexist world.

So fascinating really, I always wonder where this male entitlement comes from.

Like at what point in your life do you start to think it's perfectly fine to trivialize women's experiences (why the quotation marks, why "problem" instead of problem, did you even read the thread or the title? How can someone hating going outside because they'll be harassed not be a problem?), at what point do you start thinking it's perfectly fine to tell women they should enjoy or tolerate unwanted male attention as if that unwanted male attention is more valuable and more important than them feeling safe and respected in their everyday lives? (NEWSFLASH: male attention is pretty low value as most women can get it anytime they want with little to no effort, it's not like platinum or saffron it's just dick and it's everywhere.)

:yes::worship::great:^^^


https://38.media.tumblr.com/b21bd5d700d800dac5531da51ac1a50b/tumblr_mjn0swhHT51qa5foho1_400.gif

Well... They can just shut down SW and we can all go home because you 100% slayed everything with this A+ valedictorian gem of a post.

IKR^?:10:


I'm not trying to trivialize the fact that some women feel threatened by some of the attention they get from guys in public. I haven't seen the threatening types they have experienced, but I believe they have experienced it.

I was referring to the juvenile wolf whistle type of attention, which seems silly to me, but not threatening. I'm not referring to attention where the men are following the women, or making obscene comments. Anyone would feel threatened by that.

::)Really?^ Well, yeah, that's how you feel

As an aside, it's kind of ironic that it is because men are such visual creatures that the less intellectual ones express their attraction by way of cat calls and wolf whistles. And yet it is that same visual trait of men that makes stripping a viable occupation.

Oh, ok, thanks for clearing that up::)

ScarletKitten
02-21-2015, 01:58 AM
As an aside, it's kind of ironic that it is because men are such visual creatures that the less intellectual ones express their attraction by way of cat calls and wolf whistles. And yet it is that same visual trait of men that makes stripping a viable occupation.

You do have a point there. Without men enjoying feasting their eyes on us in the club, we would not be making a living stripping. That's true.

However, being a stripper just makes catcalling even MORE irritating to us. As strippers we get poked, prodded, grabbed at, talked down to, made to feel like pieces of meat, etc etc. as part of our jobs. So, having to put up with being harassed on the street outside of work, just makes us want to hibernate permanently. It's enough we have to deal with shit at work. On our free time, too? No thanks. It definitely irritates me even more as a stripper, than it did before I ever became a stripper.

But either way, all one can do is ignore it. There are worse things that can happen to a woman. But it doesn't make it any less disrespectful and irritating.

Likethis
02-21-2015, 07:18 AM
I'm not trying to trivialize the fact that some women feel threatened by some of the attention they get from guys in public. I haven't seen the threatening types they have experienced, but I believe they have experienced it.

I was referring to the juvenile wolf whistle type of attention, which seems silly to me, but not threatening. I'm not referring to attention where the men are following the women, or making obscene comments. Anyone would feel threatened by that.

As an aside, it's kind of ironic that it is because men are such visual creatures that the less intellectual ones express their attraction by way of cat calls and wolf whistles. And yet it is that same visual trait of men that makes stripping a viable occupation.
It doesn't really matter what you're referring to though, why is it so important to be able to unasked comment on women's appearances, to wolf whistle and shout "hey beautiful", why would you rather tell women to tolerate any possible discomfort than tell men to shut up? Since it's not that important that women feel comfortable (they should just tolerate it if they don't enjoy it) what is it you're looking out for? Why should that entitlement to unasked put the stamp of male approval on strange women's bodies be protected to the point where you tell women to "just tolerate it"? Why exactly should women tolerate any of it?

Also how do you know it's just a silly juvenile type of attention and not the kind that could get you shot/get your face slashed/get you sexually or verbally attacked? How do you know for sure in that moment when it happens? Let's say you've been attacked in some way before, how do you know it's just a juvenile harassment this time and they're not gonna disrespect you further or follow you to your house? Time will tell what happens or not happens to you and even that initial feeling of potential threat is completely unnecessary considering men could just shut up and stop the "silly" harassment instead of demanding women tolerate it.

I don't see your point there with the visual creatures actually, because a lot of people who come to strip clubs do not catcall.
Using that same logic you're using you could also say that isn't it ironic that men are such verbal creatures, isn't it ironic that what some express with: "Hey beautiful, hey hey I'm talking to you I'm saying you're beautiful don't be a bitch you need dick you frigid cunt!" is the same verbal trait that makes it possible to have a proper conversation with men? Like am I supposed to be so thankful that men are visual and verbal creatures that I should tolerate whatever they throw at me? What's ironic, I think it's pretty basic? I don't see where you're going with this, we don't need to have street harassment to have strip clubs. It's not two sides of the same coin unless you think men shouting I'M CALLING YOU BEAUTIFUL YOU FUCKING CUNT is the ironic and inevitable downside of men being verbal creatures capable of conversation. Like what are you trying to say with that? We're not asking people to completely quit being visual or verbal creatures here, we're asking for respect and it's pretty simple.

Disclaimer: If your point and the irony of the whole visual creatures thing just has gone completely over my head my excuse is that I'm a foreigner and English is not my first language and especially abstract things like irony can be hard, I don't understand all the time even in my own language. Please explain what you mean exactly by what you wrote, thanks.

Likethis
02-21-2015, 07:20 AM
Also:

I don't mind some of the comments I receive but I realize that exact same comment could make another woman uncomfortable (for example if she has experienced a lot of threatening harassment or maybe even been physically attacked, or if she's just sick of men thinking their opinion matters, or whatever reason she has, it doesn't really matter to me why). I wouldn't mind at all if men just kept quiet if it meant that women would feel more safe, comfortable and respected.

gameover
02-21-2015, 10:15 AM
I
It doesn't really matter what you're referring to though, why is it so important to be able to unasked comment on women's appearances, to wolf whistle and shout "hey beautiful", why would you rather tell women to tolerate any possible discomfort than tell men to shut up? Since it's not that important that women feel comfortable (they should just tolerate it if they don't enjoy it) what is it you're looking out for? Why should that entitlement to unasked put the stamp of male approval on strange women's bodies be protected to the point where you tell women to "just tolerate it"? Why exactly should women tolerate any of it?

Also how do you know it's just a silly juvenile type of attention and not the kind that could get you shot/get your face slashed/get you sexually or verbally attacked? How do you know for sure in that moment when it happens? Let's say you've been attacked in some way before, how do you know it's just a juvenile harassment this time and they're not gonna disrespect you further or follow you to your house? Time will tell what happens or not happens to you and even that initial feeling of potential threat is completely unnecessary considering men could just shut up and stop the "silly" harassment instead of demanding women tolerate it.

I don't see your point there with the visual creatures actually, because a lot of people who come to strip clubs do not catcall.
Using that same logic you're using you could also say that isn't it ironic that men are such verbal creatures, isn't it ironic that what some express with: "Hey beautiful, hey hey I'm talking to you I'm saying you're beautiful don't be a bitch you need dick you frigid cunt!" is the same verbal trait that makes it possible to have a proper conversation with men? Like am I supposed to be so thankful that men are visual and verbal creatures that I should tolerate whatever they throw at me? What's ironic, I think it's pretty basic? I don't see where you're going with this, we don't need to have street harassment to have strip clubs. It's not two sides of the same coin unless you think men shouting I'M CALLING YOU BEAUTIFUL YOU FUCKING CUNT is the ironic and inevitable downside of men being verbal creatures capable of conversation. Like what are you trying to say with that? We're not asking people to completely quit being visual or verbal creatures here, we're asking for respect and it's pretty simple.

Disclaimer: If your point and the irony of the whole visual creatures thing just has gone completely over my head my excuse is that I'm a foreigner and English is not my first language and especially abstract things like irony can be hard, I don't understand all the time even in my own language. Please explain what you mean exactly by what you wrote, thanks.

I didn't mean to stir up a hornets nest. Clearly, this is an emotional topic for some. I just responded to posts that implied that I condoned the violent cat calling some had described. I don't condone any kind of violence or threats toward women. I'm sorry for any of you that have felt threatened by any man's actions. And just to be clear, I have never cat called a woman in any way.

I treated this topic more lightly than I should have, because the only cat calling I have personally seen, is the silly wolf whistle variety.

kaninchen
02-21-2015, 06:26 PM
I didn't mean to stir up a hornets nest. Clearly, this is an emotional topic for some. I just responded to posts that implied that I condoned the violent cat calling some had described. I don't condone any kind of violence or threats toward women. I'm sorry for any of you that have felt threatened by any man's actions. And just to be clear, I have never cat called a woman in any way.

I treated this topic more lightly than I should have, because the only cat calling I have personally seen, is the silly wolf whistle variety.

On the one hand, your first post really pissed me off, on the other, it's understandable, because you don't have to live with harassment like we do. So let me say that I sincerely appreciate you thinking critically about this topic. :yes:

Anyway, the reason this is an emotional topic is that women die over stuff like this. Even the "silly wolf whistle" variety of street harassment can and does escalate into women being violently assaulted and killed. Like, seriously, dude, it happens all the time, google "street harassment woman killed" and you'll see what I mean, if you want.

Selina M
02-21-2015, 06:49 PM
I was referring to the juvenile wolf whistle type of attention, which seems silly to me, but not threatening. I'm not referring to attention where the men are following the women, or making obscene comments. Anyone would feel threatened by that.
.

Just because it's not threatening doesn't make it ok... it's rude as fuck and in my mind, any man that wolf whistles has just descended back down at least 2 rungs of the evolutionary ladder.

The neighbor kid used to whistle at me nearly every day and my boyfriend about wrung his neck for it, because even from his male perspective, it was a) annoying, b) rude, c) crass, d) "when has that ever gotten anyone a date?"

If I ever catch my kid whistling at girls, he's first going to get an earful, and then going to be taught that the correct way to let a girl know you're interested is to POLITELY tell her she caught your eye and ask if she'd like to get coffee sometime. Any kid of mine will be a gentleman, dammit.

Vyanka
02-22-2015, 10:45 AM
Just because it's not threatening doesn't make it ok... it's rude as fuck and in my mind, any man that wolf whistles has just descended back down at least 2 rungs of the evolutionary ladder.

The neighbor kid used to whistle at me nearly every day and my boyfriend about wrung his neck for it, because even from his male perspective, it was a) annoying, b) rude, c) crass, d) "when has that ever gotten anyone a date?"

If I ever catch my kid whistling at girls, he's first going to get an earful, and then going to be taught that the correct way to let a girl know you're interested is to POLITELY tell her she caught your eye and ask if she'd like to get coffee sometime. Any kid of mine will be a gentleman, dammit.

Me too. I always said if I ever had boys, I will make sure they grow up to be respectable gentlemen. So many out there lack it.

lurkingtitties
02-22-2015, 12:12 PM
Also how do you know it's just a silly juvenile type of attention and not the kind that could get you shot/get your face slashed/get you sexually or verbally attacked? How do you know for sure in that moment when it happens? Let's say you've been attacked in some way before, how do you know it's just a juvenile harassment this time and they're not gonna disrespect you further or follow you to your house? Time will tell what happens or not happens to you and even that initial feeling of potential threat is completely unnecessary considering men could just shut up and stop the "silly" harassment instead of demanding women tolerate it.

Yup yup yup yup yup! That is one of the worst effects of catcalling and other more threatening behaviors. If you live in an area with a high incidence of it, or have been attacked by a catcaller, you will feel the need to be on guard 100% of the time when you leave the house. Every male you pass you will be analyzing their threat potential. Yes we know not all guys are scum but it doesn't eliminate the need to drop your guard. It gets exhausting.

lurkingtitties
02-22-2015, 12:18 PM
On a more positive note, something that has been working amazingly well for me recently is getting a large dog. I adopted mine a month ago and have only been catcalled 3 times since, and every time it was by guys in cars aka with a barrier between themselves and the dog. As someone who has been getting catcalled almost every time I go outside since about age 14 it's pretty amazing to finally be able to relax and enjoy life when I'm out walking! Highly recommend it if you have the time and space in your home.

22lligm
02-22-2015, 12:32 PM
I didn't read all the comments and I saw this thread before but never watched the video until now.. but have you guys read the comments on that youtube video?? Everyone saying how rude she was and "other girls would be grateful" to be asked how their day is going. It's annoying because if she was a man those guys wouldn't even be asking how her day is going. And the guys who were following her definitely looked like they would assault her if there were no other people around and it wasn't in the middle of the day. So fucking creepy. I also have been hit on when I'm just in no makeup and a sweatshirt and sweats.. it's like even if we go out in literally a trash bag with ZERO need for attention there's always going to be that one creep out there.

I remember being little at a park with my sister who's five years older than me and these other boys her age were trying to get her attention and talk to her.. she just ignored them and they spit on her. Who is raising them to act like this towards girls/women??

Selina M
02-23-2015, 05:36 AM
On a more positive note, something that has been working amazingly well for me recently is getting a large dog. I adopted mine a month ago and have only been catcalled 3 times since, and every time it was by guys in cars aka with a barrier between themselves and the dog. As someone who has been getting catcalled almost every time I go outside since about age 14 it's pretty amazing to finally be able to relax and enjoy life when I'm out walking! Highly recommend it if you have the time and space in your home.

Yeees definitely! I am so much more comfortable when one of the dogs is with me. I'll see the guy look at me, and then at the dog, and then visibly change his mind about speaking to me. Even better when the GSD that's leash aggressive is having a bark-at-everyone day.
Though I have had one ballsy guy come up and want to pet him, trying to use it as an icebreaker.

stripperMBA
02-23-2015, 10:08 PM
I grew up in a low income Mexican-American neighborhood. I reached puberty at the age of 16 which is very late in comparison to the girls in my class. Even at the age of 12 before I had tits for an ass I was getting verbally sexually harassed while waiting at the bus stop. I even recall coming home from ballet class in my tights and black leotard and having some Complemented my toothpick legs and told me to cover up even though I was obviously a young kid and still looked like a toothpick. The end result of this was that I grew up I moved out of the barrio. My stepbrother once he had a family attempted to stay in the neighborhood we grew up in. But due to the harassment his teenage daughters received even in their soccer uniforms which were not scanty at all. Baggy top and baggy shorts that came to the knees. And when I say harassment I mean guys cursing at girls who do not want to talk to them. This is very common in the neighborhood. I had a few instances where guys will be kept harrasing me while they had a kid in the car seat in the back seat. Anyway what I say is that all of this harassment was very commonplace in the low income community that I grew up in, and then in the barrio area I lived in while going to university. So I left these neighborhoods and so did my brother when he realized the way his daughters of being treated as they walked down the street. I think what has happened because of the harassment is that there is an economic consequence as well. in that those who educate themselves and and get a trade or build a business then move out of the barrio. Taking their income with them but also taking income from fundraisers that could have contributed to lower income schools. That income now goes into the school closest to me are closest to where my step brother lives. I have only experienced the kind of street harassment I faced living in lower income Latin American or Mexican American neighborhoods. Quite frankly it was always disgusting to me and in addition to being cursed at in Spanish for refusing to respond was always going way too far. Today I live in the predominately white neighborhood that is upper-class. I think I got whistled at by some Teens once but unlike the neighborhood that i lived in previously these people did not attempt to follow me home. Which was common when I lived in the barrio. I hate to stereotype my own people. But I hardly surprised that all those women have been brutally murdered in juarez Mexico. And the street harassment is just part of a greater sociological problem in some areas. When you talk shit to a woman on the street that is just fucked up. If there is anyone out there doesn't think that street harassment is fucked up. That person needs to come to Pleasant Grove in Dallas. it will open your eyes and at the same time leave you disgusted.

Unkle Fuzzy
02-23-2015, 11:21 PM
There just isn't any point in a male saying anything more than, "Excuse me Miss, you look great today"

lynn2009
02-23-2015, 11:51 PM
There just isn't any point in a male saying anything more than, "Excuse me Miss, you look great today"

You don't need to comment on her appearance at all. She knows she looks good. Men feeling the need to voice that suggests that she somehow needs or wants your validation on her appearance, which she does not.

Unkle Fuzzy
02-24-2015, 02:00 AM
Let me get this straight, you would eliminate all complimentary communication between individuals??

kaninchen
02-24-2015, 09:44 AM
^ No. But really, if two people aren't friends or otherwise close, there's no reason for them to share their opinions about the other person's body. It's rude and invasive especially when it's coming from a man to a woman because really, all those comments amount to is, "Hey babe, I would totally fuck you." Women do not need to hear that in any form when they're just trying to go about their daily life. We don't care. It's gross. It's irrelevant.

There are a thousand other things to talk about, anyway. Say it's a beautiful day, say you're glad it's almost spring, say you like her shoes, even. Contrary to popular belief, women's bodies are not public property, and we are not inviting open scrutiny upon ourselves whenever we leave the house.

Kellydancer
02-24-2015, 10:25 AM
That. To me there is a difference if a family friend makes a comment versus a stranger. Most of the time when a man compliments me is because he hopes it means I'll go out with him. Most of the compliments aren't, they tend to be sexual.

Aurora_Sunset
02-24-2015, 10:34 AM
^ No. But really, if two people aren't friends or otherwise close, there's no reason for them to share their opinions about the other person's body. It's rude and invasive especially when it's coming from a man to a woman because really, all those comments amount to is, "Hey babe, I would totally fuck you." Women do not need to hear that in any form when they're just trying to go about their daily life. We don't care. It's gross. It's irrelevant.

There are a thousand other things to talk about, anyway. Say it's a beautiful day, say you're glad it's almost spring, say you like her shoes, even. Contrary to popular belief, women's bodies are not public property, and we are not inviting open scrutiny upon ourselves whenever we leave the house.

This is it exactly. If you don't know someone, why feel such a pressing need to comment on their body anyway? Do you automatically assume that if a woman deigned to make herself look not like a bag-lady before stepping out the door, that must mean she was trying to attract attention and compliments? I dress nicely because I like looking in the mirror and liking what I see. My day is not ruined if I walk throughout town all day and nobody else calls attention to the fact that I look good. I still know I look good. I'm starting to think, and correct me if I'm wrong, but do men assume that just because they would walk out the door in their underwear with the hole in the crotch without giving a single fuck if it were socially acceptable, women must only doll themselves up because of other people as well? Seriously, some of us just like to not feel like crap about our appearance for ourselves, not just when we're going to be in the public eye. Hell, I put on makeup when I'm home by myself all day just cuz I like to feel nice. There's no one around to comment on it, and yet.... it doesn't matter because other people aren't the point behind me doing it.

The point of a compliment is to make the other person feel good. If a strange woman is not going to feel good by the fact that you've called attention to the fact that you were checking her out, why do it? At that point, it's not about them anymore. If you're going to compliment a stranger at all, why not compliment them on something more meaningful or specific than simply being overall attractive. Like kaninchen stated, I would much rather a compliment about my killer shoes or funky purse than a sweeping comment on my body. In this vein, are pretty women the only ones deserving of compliments?

It's a little disturbing that you jumped so quickly from "don't comment on my body" to "oh, so you just don't want any sort of compliments?" As though making a comment on a woman's body is the only compliment you could give a female....

slowpoke
02-28-2015, 10:52 AM
On the other hand

http://sfglobe.com/?id=18976