Log in

View Full Version : Do Looks Matter? (in a man) .....



Pages : 1 [2]

SnuffleUffleGrass
02-15-2015, 04:48 PM
I've learned over the years that I have a "minimum standard" that's a combination of looks, personality, and intelligence. If you're dumb or bitchy, you better be HOT. If your not hot, the brains and personality need to be on point. But even more than that, is just the nebulous concept of "chemistry". If it's there, the rest matters less and less. And if it's not, no amount of any combination is going to keep my interest for very long. I think that as we mature, this becomes the case more and more for both genders.

I find this interesting b/c I've noticed hot unstable women often have very painful experiences in dealing with men (aka "getting used.") A friend of mine who was hot and legit mentally ill (bipolar 1) got shoved out of a moving car during a bipolar episode by some dude she was dating. A lot of these girls also end up having kids out of wedlock (botched "trap him with a baby" schemes) and just having a series of dramatic, flawed relationships.

I guess as to me (a female) it's sad b/c no one wants to see a mentally ill person get brutalized/used. However in the US it's very very hard to force people to take help until the law literally does it for them.

OK that was a threadjack but anyhow, in my mind men are ruled by their wants and lust...IMO attractive men just have a way easier time of getting what they want....

Nyla19
02-21-2015, 01:55 PM
Looks really do matter to me. And I've gotten worse the older I've gotten. Oh well! Most men are so superficial to us anyway!!!! Lol!!!

threlayer
04-13-2015, 11:05 PM
It is entirely possible that a very attractive man who is an "A" type could be narcissistic. I could say the same thing about a woman of same characteristics. I believe as people mature, they are able to see that the things that matter and are innate are more important than the things that will change in due course, such as youthful beauty. Of course for a one night stand or other casual sex, physical attraction may have the priority. Just some insight from an older, single guy.

invibe
04-14-2015, 12:30 AM
Cool thread. I'm actually torn between good look in a poor man and a wealthy man that's ugly.....

Looks definitely matter. I can't get horny over an ugly dude. Well maybe if I closed my eyes.

But when I think of having kids, my first selection would be based on physical attraction. Then my rational mind would takeover and convince me that the ugly dudes are more likely to stay and raise a family.

So if I couldn't find an attractive guy who is also wealthy then If I could get away with it I'd marry the wealthy ugly man for economic stability but have the good looking poor man as a side piece.

I think this is interesting because it is a common thought about how female attraction actually works. The theory is that many women are attracted to two different types, the "sex partner" and the "provider". A man can be both of course, and those are probably the happiest relationships for the woman. Assuming it isn't BS.

Honestly I think women are quite a bit more picky than men. Very rarely do real men describe their ideal woman in precise physical attributes. I can only speak for myself, but a woman is either attractive to me or she isn't. The closest I can come to a description is eyes, long hair and a cute face and I like women shorter than me but at 6'1 that is normal. I've been as sexually attracted to a thick girl with a big butt and boobs as a slender athletic girl with comparatively small everything, and everything in between.

My interpretation of women being honest about what they find physically attractive is a bit more narrow. Taller than them, lean and visible muscle tone. Too much/too little muscle, too much body fat, and too short are out.

If I had to crudely put it down to one thing for each sex it is men are faces, and women are fitness.

Pretty interesting really.

SnuffleUffleGrass
04-15-2015, 07:24 PM
Confession time- I've become more "shallow" with age b/c being "not shallow" in youth didn't help me out at all!!! A lot of young less-attractive males have less interest in LTRs for different reasons. A young attractive guy gets used to attention from women (AND men) & usually secretly senses he "has a lot of options" and is less inclined to settle down for a LTR. These are generalizations, but anyhow....that's what I noticed in my universe.

It's also embarrassing to admit but my current boyfriend's attractiveness and male endowment has made it easier to reconcile differences & we are happy together. (Mind you this is after years of propping up "sad sack" boyfriends.) So reward for overlooking lack of sex appeal= ZERO. It's good to choose character over appearance in friendships but maybe not in romantic relationships...

EastCoastDancer01
04-19-2015, 09:06 PM
Yes, I'd be lying if I said they didnt matter. But he doesnt have to be an Abercrombie model, I actually dont find that look attractive in men. What I do care about is that he is clean and hygienic, has good teeth, a nice face and body and he has to have a good dick. The right size, straight and circumsized,etc. Looks matter to me because I need to be attracted to the person I am with but I also think personality is what seals the deal. Even if I found a guy who was physically perfect, a shitty personality can cancel it all out. In addition to physical attraction, I need to be compatible with him on a personal level too. That is an absolute must for me. I could never take a good looking guy with a shitty personality seriously.