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dokturok
04-16-2015, 10:36 AM
I was at work the other day and needed to talk to a co-worker. She is a very attractive woman and could easily have been a dancer or model - I'll explain later why this is relevant - and I spoke to her exactly twice during the day. The first was in the morning when I saw her in the hallway and said, "Katie, I need to talk to you when you get a minute." The second was later in the afternoon when I stopped at her desk and said, "Do you have a minute, I need to talk to you." She sighed in annoyed disgust and frustration, rolling her eyes, "I have a boyfriend." I hadn't encountered such pure narcissism in my life. Now, you can choose to believe me or not, but I honestly had had no intention of asking her out. Yes, she was physically attractive, and I had considered doing so at one time until I got to know her. We had absolutely nothing in common, and more importantly, she didn't stimulate me intellectually so that was an automatic deal breaker. Luckily I had the perfect reply: "Congratulations. Let me know when you have those numbers ready for me, you were supposed to have them yesterday."

Now, one could reasonably argue that she was simply having a bad day. That's understandable. However, I talked to both male and female co-workers and some of the men said they had had similar experiences and the women said they had overheard her several times complaining about having to work in a place where everybody wanted her. This experience reminded me of a theory I had when I was in high school: the more physically attractive a woman is, the more her personality tends to reflect a sense of narcissism and entitlement. An idea that life is there simply to serve them. I've shared this idea with people and have been accused of simply being jaded at having been rejected by such women, but I have also spoken with many more people who agree with this theory.

Before I go any further, this is not to imply that all physically attractive women have such attitudes. Personally I graduated with a girl who to this day I swear was the inspiration for the song, "She Don't Know She's Beautiful." She looked like a cross between Marilyn Monroe and Faith Hill and she had absolutely no idea how pretty she was. She was nice to everyone, always the first one to help, the epitome of a true lady. Conversely, I have also met women that would fail to meet what society would deem to be attractive who also think every man is hitting on them. I remember one instance when I told a woman I was dating, "You know, you're not cute enough to be this snotty." Believe me, her behavior was completely unacceptable and she was of the mind that her looks entitled her to such behavior.

The women on this site are very attractive. They have to be or they wouldn't be in this industry, so I felt this would be the perfect place to research my theory. If you are reading this, I would appreciate your answering the following questions as well as any additional feedback you would be willing to give. Thank you for your help.


On a scale of 1 to 10, with one being the lowest, ten being the highest, what score would you give yourself in terms of physical appearance?

Have you ever used your physical appearance for personal gain, i.e. flirted with a police officer to get out of a speeding ticket?

Have you ever been in a situation similar to the one described above, when you thought someone was hitting on/flirting with you and they weren't?

How often, if at all, do you believe you have the "entitled attitude" described above?

Thank you again for all your help.

Sam38g
04-16-2015, 11:41 AM
Why did you premise asking a question with a question? Why not just ask her what you needed instead of the "I need to talk to you when you get a minute?" Crap. Why not just get to the point & ask her what you needed?

Men who do a premise question instead of just getting to the business RARELY are about business & more about personal matters. Has nothing to do with how she looks or how females use their looks to get ahead in life. Just as many men use their looks, wit, charm to get ahead in the work place as females do....

Don't believe you at ALL> but I honestly had had no intention of asking her out. Yes, she was physically attractive, and I had considered doing so at one time until I got to know her. We had absolutely nothing in common, and more importantly, she didn't stimulate me intellectually so that was an automatic deal breaker. Luckily I had the perfect reply: "Congratulations. Let me know when you have those numbers ready for me, you were supposed to have them yesterday."

A perfect reply? So you were on planning to ask her out, to invite her to your dick. If you just wanted to ask for the numbers, then you just would have asked for them without all the other bs of having a question to ask a question or a perfect reply.

You are afraid of rejection. You wanted to ask her out & got feeling hurt cause she turned you down before even getting asked. So you were sending out those creepy guy vibes & she was honest instead of misleading you on. It is a job, she doesn't owe you are date or to even be friends. Who cares about your friend in college, it has nothing to do with the work place.

You got rejected, move on. STOP being such a jerk & obsessing over it.

dokturok
04-16-2015, 11:44 AM
I think I hit a little too close to home. Thank you, your reply supports my hypothesis.

miss.a.p1600
04-16-2015, 12:27 PM
I dont think this is the place to conduct research.

audritwo
04-16-2015, 01:32 PM
I think the answer to this is stop gossiping about your coworker with the rest of the office. Why do you care? Is it that important?

Aniela
04-16-2015, 01:51 PM
I think the answer to this is stop gossiping about your coworker with the rest of the office. Why do you care? Is it that important?

This ^^^^ 10000%.

Further, it sounds like you came here having already made up your mind & are more interested in moulding our replies to fit your views, rather than genuinely wanting to learn from anything we might have to say. Surely your time would be better spent elsewhere.

wednesday86
04-16-2015, 02:29 PM
Actually the most beautiful women I know are wonderful people. My best friends and the women in my family all come to mind...Intelligent, warm, caring, wonderful mothers, etc. They just tend to get sick of being hit on all the time. Wouldn't you get sick of it if men (not women--men that you had 0 interest in) constantly tried asking you out/telling you how pretty you are/trying to get your attention?

Sure maybe beautiful women use their looks to their advantage-why wouldn't they? Wouldn't you? If you need money and you can make a shit ton dancing or modeling, why not? If you could bat your eyelashes to get out of a speeding ticket or get free stuff, why not? But at the end of the day it's men putting these women on a pedestal. Some women have just figured out how to exploit the system to their advantage. Even you said the girl you were dating "wasn't cute enough to act like that" as in you would possibly put up with more crazy if she was hotter.
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It sounds like you're lacking what you really want (a beautiful woman at your side) you got rejected, and you're projecting it onto us. Nothing wrong with wanting that, but making sweeping generalizations that "all beautiful women are entitled/crazy/narcissists/etc" isn't going to help you achieve your desire. It just sounds like whining.

laurielegs
04-16-2015, 04:05 PM
Why did you premise asking a question with a question? Why not just ask her what you needed instead of the "I need to talk to you when you get a minute?" Crap. Why not just get to the point & ask her what you needed?



Exactly what my thoughts were before I even read the rest of the thread.

All you needed to tell her was that you needed those figures. Just get to the point.

ScarletKitten
04-16-2015, 04:19 PM
Wow. Misogynistic much? LMFAO. Men like you make me laugh.

Djoser
04-16-2015, 04:20 PM
The women on this site are very attractive. They have to be or they wouldn't be in this industry, so I felt this would be the perfect place to research my theory. If you are reading this, I would appreciate your answering the following questions as well as any additional feedback you would be willing to give. Thank you for your help..

We need an alarm buzzer for blanket statements like these. Obviously you have no experience in the industry or you would realize that there are all kinds of women working in stripclubs; tall, short, slender, fat, and all manner of variety can easily be found. Furthermore many of them haven't been to a gym or gone on a diet in many years. Generally speaking, management has opted to allow almost any woman to get onstage, just so long as she pays 50-200$ house fees to do so. That is the number one criteria, NOT looks.

Furthermore, entitlement works both ways. Men are just as guilty as women in this regard, and the ratio of 'falsely entitled' men to women is about even, though there are a lot more women than men in the clubs so it's not always as readily apparent to the outside observer. They just tend to show it in somewhat different ways.

Djoser
04-16-2015, 04:24 PM
Furthermore, this is not the time or place for you to do 'sociological research' of this particular kind. Thread closed.