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MistressX
02-01-2016, 03:39 PM
I never go out. I can count on one hand the times I "go out" actually, to do something fun like get together with the hearse people (ok not as fun anymore) or go out with my BFF for a night on the town. I just hate interacting with people. When I have to ride somewhere on my bike or am walking somewhere, I see men and I see that they see me. I get a lot of rude comments and cat calls and I just think to myself as I pass them *dont talk to me dont talk to me dont talk to me), try not to make eye contact or even pretend I am texting or whatever. Just dont fucking talk to me, anyone, I hate you all! Leave me alone and thats that. I stay in the house 95% of the time, and its starting to get to me, but every time I go out somewhere I usually end up regretting it. Blech!

KaraLynn
03-10-2016, 07:39 PM
I'm a total hermit......

R-209
04-21-2016, 12:44 PM
Ugh. Why is writing a two or three sentence reply to a Facebook PM from someone you used to go to school with as stressful as writing the damn State of the Union address?

Jassi
07-21-2016, 10:46 AM
I was having severe panic attacks, started in late May.
I have not had them this bad for several years, I am recovering from the anxiety. I forget how bad it gets, until it starts again.
I think I did the best I could, I talked to some close friends about what was going on. The friends that I trust, the ones I know won't repeat or gossip about it.
I'm still jumpy, but much more calm and focused. Functioning is difficult, I'm in a more relaxed state of mind, I want to enjoy the rest of this month.

Jassi
08-02-2016, 05:06 PM
This was in my email this morning, I get daily inspirational quotes. Anxiety is real, I usually create more stress about my life than I should. Hope this helps, if anyone is having a stressful day.


“The truth is that there is no actual stress or anxiety in the world; it's your thoughts that create these false beliefs. You can't package stress, touch it, or see it. There are only people engaged in stressful thinking.”

― Wayne Dyer

Koryn Capri
08-02-2016, 10:24 PM
This was in my email this morning, I get daily inspirational quotes. Anxiety is real, I usually create more stress about my life than I should. Hope this helps, if anyone is having a stressful day.


“The truth is that there is no actual stress or anxiety in the world; it's your thoughts that create these false beliefs. You can't package stress, touch it, or see it. There are only people engaged in stressful thinking.”

― Wayne Dyer

Thread-Jack, here...lol.

Thanks, for this quote!

I love Wayne Dyer. So sad that he passed-away. This World is truly missing an Angel!

DelilahLoveBite
10-03-2016, 03:44 AM
I know most people don't believe in mental health disorders. They're wrong. I used to get the whole, "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" routine by people. A lot of people. People can believe in demons, gods, magick, ghosts. Parents encourage kids to believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy, but for some reason, people either cannot or will not accept the facts of mental health disorders. In fact, more people believe in god and Christianity than the mentally...because a fictional character is more believable than a chemical imbalance in a person's brain. Right.

External forces and past events are the most common reasons for depression. Luckily, these can normally be overcome by simply facing the problem, be it with a counselor, therapy, or on your own. Facing the problem and changing your behavior. It sounds simple, but it takes a lot of hard work and dedication and can often be emotionally taxing and mentally grueling.

I have a mental disorder, Major-Depressive Disorder with a severe mood-disorder - and who doesn't have ADHD. Lawl. I have trouble forming meaningful relationships with others. I can't keep a 9-5 job because I have days so immensely painful I can't get out of bed. I've gone for weeks without showering because my body won't move. Some days are better than others, some are better, but MDD isn't a figment of my imagination. I was diagnosed at 17 and remained unmedicated until about a year ago. It's not an easy thing to deal with. Sometimes I can't leave my apartment to get cigarettes...I'll stare at the door handle for hours, telling myself its ok, you can leave, you need to leave, but I won't. Sometimes people don't hear from me for weeks at a time. I've spent an entire week in bed sleeping because there are times its better than being awake.

I just try to remind myself that I'm not alone...even though I feel like I am all the time.

Violethollywood
10-03-2016, 06:22 AM
I have anxiety as is, but moving this last time to a town I'm not super familiar with made it worse. i might leave the hose once a week with my b/f and that's for grocery shopping . It's driving me crazy b/c i used to go everywhere. I just i hate this side of town this place is , I don't know my neighbors or anything. Like I want to go for walks but i'm paranoid about all the people that are gonna be peeping out of their window at me . Is that weird? i mean that's a legitimate thing right? ugh . I feel mentally crippled by this shit. All my friends moved out of state so i don't really have any friends left anyway. I hate it though . I used to be a very sociaable person. Now i'm stuck at home with the baby24/7 and basically no help except when i need a shower. Ugh i need to snap out of it.

R-209
10-06-2016, 08:16 PM
I wish I could thank your posts fifty times.

R-209
10-06-2016, 08:34 PM
I must also say, in total seriousness, that Pokemon Go has been very good for my social anxiety. I'm finding myself wanting to get out and explore different places just to play the game!

Here's a good article about it (https://www.engadget.com/2016/07/13/pokemon-go-mental-health-science/?utm_content=bufferecae1&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer).

TheNewGirl2
10-18-2016, 04:34 PM
I've had bad social anxiety lately. Like I'll grocery shop at certain stores just because they have a self checkout & I don't have to talk to anybody. I hardly ever go out & I feel like I have no friends anymore. At work I'm the total opposite, I talk to everybody- I'm fun & outgoing. Maybe I'm just tired of people after working xD I've been trying to post on here more often hoping it will help at least a little bit.

OrwellianNightmare
10-25-2016, 05:46 PM
Where's the problem with staying away from the crazy world and binge watching some great TV shows? As long as we don't do it for too long.
Life can be a beautiful but scary thing.
I tend to snap out and leave my cabin in the woods and go sit at a coffee house and watch the young people for hours and get my groove back on and not want to return home sometimes because I like it so much.
Excessive amounts of anything is never good.
You can kill yourself by drinking too much water!

LoveyDovey
11-14-2016, 10:27 AM
I'm so glad I'm not alone. I do not like going out. I do not like talking to other adults at my kid's sports practices. I do not like going to parties. It all just feels like such a chore and there's always that one person who's got to be the one to piss everybody off. My home is my little sanctuary where everything is peaceful and quiet and I don't have to deal with anyone or anything. There is no drama.

Exxotica
12-11-2016, 08:01 PM
This line of work actually makes me want to be more social. When I was in the vanilla world, I hated everything and everybody. Maybe you guys don't enjoy your job and its time to get out.

DeathAndTaxes
01-04-2017, 10:20 PM
What if I told you guys it might not be your job, but that you guys are just far more intelligent than the average person? I used to have severe social anxiety over a decade ago, along with depression. What made me change is the fact that I wanted to meet more people that shared my intellectual interests. Meeting these people online is a bit of a crutch because you can easily find them, but in real life you have to meet, and meet, and meet and all of a sudden you are a social butterfly everybody loves to be with. Eventually you will meet smart chill people and form better bonds with them.

I really like smart girls and they tend to be introverted, to get them out of their shells I always tell them that if they just met me at a party they would have thought I was some dumb jock. I am not going to debate philosophy or anything deep right away, so just pretend everybody is not that easy to read (even though quite frankly they are 95% of the time).

BTW if you hate doing small talk because it triggers PTSD change it slightly, at work you have to entertain one customer (more often than not) then make it sufficiently different to prevent flashbacks in real life: try to always entertain a small mixed group, it is a completely different intellectual challenge, and trust me it is not boring to perfectly hold the interest of a dozen people!

Selina M
01-04-2017, 11:14 PM
This line of work actually makes me want to be more social. When I was in the vanilla world, I hated everything and everybody. Maybe you guys don't enjoy your job and its time to get out.

Why is that the automatic assumption? Shit, why can't we enjoy people at work and just not have energy for strangers outside of that?
That's like telling a cook "maybe he doesn't enjoy his job" when he doesn't want to cook a gourmet meal for his family after a 9 hour restaurant shift ::)

xxxGothBarbie
01-23-2017, 11:55 PM
wow, I haven't replied to this post since I created it almost 2 yrs ago lol. Anyhoo, since i started camming I have turned into way more of a hermit than before & i love it. It also doesn't help that i live in a small town where everyone seems to annoy the fuck out of me with their overly opiniated political views & what not. I always feel like people are looking at me & talking sometimes ugh I hate it. This last week I left the house & went grocery shopping & literally started feeling an anxiety/panic attack coming on from being around people. I found myself getting annoyed at everyone for either getting in my way while i'm trying to walk around the store, etc. It even gets to points like this week where i didn't work for the last 3 days & I've been sleeping the day away literally. I dunno what any of this means anymore. I'm def depressed bc I want to move away from here asap for a change of scenery but with limited funds from not working much really doesn't help me :( You guys feel me?

DeathAndTaxes
01-24-2017, 09:31 AM
Socializing is a muscle that can atrophy if you don't use it, why not just take baby steps going out? Like going to empty stores every day? Then after that the supermarket everyday? And so on. It is not about society (screw that) but about your future needs, if you move to another city it is better to have the energy to look at multiple appartments for example, rather than just settle on the first one because you are exhausted by meeting people.

Glamourmilf
01-24-2017, 09:46 AM
Socializing is a muscle that can atrophy if you don't use it, why not just take baby steps going out? Like going to empty stores every day? Then after that the supermarket everyday? And so on. It is not about society (screw that) but about your future needs, if you move to another city it is better to have the energy to look at multiple appartments for example, rather than just settle on the first one because you are exhausted by meeting people.

I agree with this.
When I was in the house for days on end, camming usually, I felt very very uncomfortable when I did go out.
It disappeared when I was homeless a couple of months ago, cause, ...yeah, I was always out.
Now that I'm in my new home, I've been staying home more, just to unpack,, catch up on work, etc.
But I can already see how when I DO go anywhere, I get annoyed, and want to go home.
I'm going to force myself to be out, because at the core, I really enjoy being out, and socializing. Talking to random strangers is one of my greatest pleasures.

DeathAndTaxes
01-24-2017, 10:01 AM
Talking to random strangers is one of my greatest pleasures

It is really fun, I get that some of you are fed up with smalltalk but it can be intellectually fulfilling if you push yourself to entertain mixed gender groups. Then there is public speaking which I love :) but none of this could be possible if I did not push myself to socialize with everyone, because I did a hermit phase too over a decade ago and I loathed the anxiety.

miss.a.p1600
01-24-2017, 10:14 AM
Go do your shopping early morning (right when it opens but definitely before 11am) and it's like having the store to yourself.

I find having a schedule different from the masses helps me avoid the annoying crowds.

And like death and taxes suggest socializing really is like exercising. If you don't do it offen it becomes a skill you're rusty at but if you do it often you get more comfortable.

Even if you are an introvert and prefer small groups or one on ones or alone time try to balance that out occasionally by going into large crowds, etc.

xxxGothBarbie
01-24-2017, 03:46 PM
I generally like to try going to places at odd hours so it lessens my encounters with others bc I can't srsly blame or hate other folks for wanting to live too. I try to leave the house at least a few times a week at most if possible for misc errands or whatnot.

R-209
03-03-2017, 11:46 AM
Out for my morning walk when I see another person coming the other way. There's that terrible awkwardness of not being sure at what distance I am supposed to acknowledge them. Then what do I say? "Hello?" "Hi!?"
When I decide the distance is appropriate, I go with "Morning!" which sounds too informal for some reason. The person returns the greeting, then asks "How are you?" Wasn't prepared for that. I quickly spit out an "Okay," which I hope didn't sound unnecessarily terse.
I later realized I had a bit of cornflake stuck to my shirt. Fuck.

Elektra Luxx
03-03-2017, 12:33 PM
Out for my morning walk when I see another person coming the other way. There's that terrible awkwardness of not being sure at what distance I am supposed to acknowledge them. Then what do I say? "Hello?" "Hi!?"
When I decide the distance is appropriate, I go with "Morning!" which sounds too informal for some reason. The person returns the greeting, then asks "How are you?" Wasn't prepared for that. I quickly spit out an "Okay," which I hope didn't sound unnecessarily terse.
I later realized I had a bit of cornflake stuck to my shirt. Fuck.

Please don't sweat it R. The person couldn't have seen it with both of you moving. So don't re-live it over and over in your head. Just take it at face value. It was a pleasant encounter.

slowpoke
03-03-2017, 12:45 PM
Out for my morning walk when I see another person coming the other way. There's that terrible awkwardness of not being sure at what distance I am supposed to acknowledge them. Then what do I say? "Hello?" "Hi!?"
When I decide the distance is appropriate, I go with "Morning!" which sounds too informal for some reason. The person returns the greeting, then asks "How are you?" Wasn't prepared for that. I quickly spit out an "Okay," which I hope didn't sound unnecessarily terse.
I later realized I had a bit of cornflake stuck to my shirt. Fuck.

Learn standard responses: Great! and how are you?' Things like that

msjoiparker
03-03-2017, 02:06 PM
I do all the time. I don't live out of a motel but I also don't have a car so it can be difficult to get around. When I think about how hard it is to get around it's like "...NM..."

WendiStarr
03-04-2017, 06:52 AM
I get like that. I'm not as bad as before when I was only doing camming. Those days the only time that I would leave my apartment was to to go the grocery store but I'd hate it. When I'm not working I like to be at home with Netflix. I make myself get out for my daughter, to go to the park on a nice, warm sunny day or if she wants to go to Toys R Us, Chuck E. Cheese, or something. Other than that I feel like people exhaust me after a while and I need to be alone to recharge myself.

DeathAndTaxes
03-08-2017, 06:13 AM
Out for my morning walk when I see another person coming the other way. There's that terrible awkwardness of not being sure at what distance I am supposed to acknowledge them. Then what do I say? "Hello?" "Hi!?"
When I decide the distance is appropriate, I go with "Morning!" which sounds too informal for some reason. The person returns the greeting, then asks "How are you?" Wasn't prepared for that. I quickly spit out an "Okay," which I hope didn't sound unnecessarily terse.
I later realized I had a bit of cornflake stuck to my shirt. Fuck.

The best advice I always give is that people really don't notice or care for that kind of stuff, the fail state is to be invisible, never to be awkward.

#1 Rule experience is better than having a thought out plan, always.

#2 Rule forget about all plans and just wing it, exercise that socializing muscle every day and soon all those negative thoughts evaporate, time will slow down, and the wit will come naturally.

SnuffleUffleGrass
03-22-2017, 11:08 AM
I'm growing out of social anxiety caused by a very difficult past 6-7 years. I feel like a butterfly stumbling out of a chrysalis...lol....

Mal707
04-01-2017, 04:41 PM
Lifetime sufferer of severe SA and selective mutism here. If it wasn't for my SA, I probably would not have even ventured into the adult industry lol Feel free to message me if you wanna talk about SA...

seashell
08-11-2017, 01:50 PM
This thread has become quite applicable to my life, lol. I don't actually have social anxiety, anymore... I've lost my ability to be anxious around people, due to all my highly social jobs... but my social skills have gone down the tubes. What the heck?! I feel like I should be great with people, considering stripping/camming basically means I entertain people for a living, and I make great money doing it, but outside of that familiar work territory, I am clueless. Also, I've been working 24/7, and it's all I can ever think about. I don't really have fun stories or anecdotes to share, because everything I do these days is focused on work... and sex work, at that.

I really hope I can get back into the swing of things, socially. Time to read through this thread and commiserate, haha.

Ifyouseekamy
08-24-2017, 09:05 PM
This thread has become quite applicable to my life, lol. I don't actually have social anxiety, anymore... I've lost my ability to be anxious around people, due to all my highly social jobs... but my social skills have gone down the tubes. What the heck?! I feel like I should be great with people, considering stripping/camming basically means I entertain people for a living, and I make great money doing it, but outside of that familiar work territory, I am clueless. Also, I've been working 24/7, and it's all I can ever think about. I don't really have fun stories or anecdotes to share, because everything I do these days is focused on work... and sex work, at that.

I really hope I can get back into the swing of things, socially. Time to read through this thread and commiserate, haha.

Amen. Sex work is different- it's pretending and people pleasing. Socializing means someone rejecting my authentic self-gulp! When I'm not at work I try to be as authentic as possible. Socializing with unhealthy personalities is different than socializing with healthier personalities- at least for me.

Glow
12-07-2017, 04:35 PM
Nope you’re not alone. I’m very quiet and keep to myself even more because my stripper life is a huge secret. It’s hard to live a lie so I usually stay really quiet especially around my family to avoid exposing myself

Ifyouseekamy
12-14-2017, 04:32 AM
Nope you’re not alone. I’m very quiet and keep to myself even more because my stripper life is a huge secret. It’s hard to live a lie so I usually stay really quiet especially around my family to avoid exposing myself

I’m not saying they are the same, but I have a lot more empathy for what gay people go through. My friend suggested socializing with the LGBT community since they are more accepting of different sexuality.

Violethollywood
12-14-2017, 01:18 PM
This thread has become quite applicable to my life, lol. I don't actually have social anxiety, anymore... I've lost my ability to be anxious around people, due to all my highly social jobs... but my social skills have gone down the tubes. What the heck?! I feel like I should be great with people, considering stripping/camming basically means I entertain people for a living, and I make great money doing it, but outside of that familiar work territory, I am clueless. Also, I've been working 24/7, and it's all I can ever think about. I don't really have fun stories or anecdotes to share, because everything I do these days is focused on work... and sex work, at that.

I really hope I can get back into the swing of things, socially. Time to read through this thread and commiserate, haha.

Right. Work is my life so I don't know how to relax and actually enjoy myself, all I can think about is how I'm missing out on making money while I'm not at home

Mb1tb
01-24-2018, 06:10 PM
I've always kinda been more withdrawn & only like the limelight in small doses but here lately I never want to leave my motel room unless it's to go to work or to get food. I want to go for walks but I feel like I'm going to just run into people I know & I don't want them to see me. I've never gotten this bad before until now. I don't really know tons of people here but it IS a small town where I will see the same people often (which bothers me). Over the last year I've been through alot & am currently homeless (by choice more less) living in a hotel, and am having major social anxieties for some odd reason or another. Do any of you go thru a withdrawal period where you want to just hide most of your days (including staying out of the gym or nature in general)? What is wrong with me?
Social anxiety is pretty common. Even outside dancing, all types of work, all types of people and all over the world. I suffer from it too and there are different ways of improving and not letting your anxiety take over too much of your life. With me its still there but as i grew older i think i just got tired of worrying too much if others would notice. Thats usually what makes it strong. If others will notice that you're anxious. Its also the very first thing you need to work on. The minute you dont care how others look at you is the minute you have won against the anxiety. It might only last till the next incident but then you will at least recall how and why last time was a success and you will have a small building block from there.

_Elle_
02-09-2018, 01:05 AM
Amen. Sex work is different- it's pretending and people pleasing. Socializing means someone rejecting my authentic self-gulp! When I'm not at work I try to be as authentic as possible. Socializing with unhealthy personalities is different than socializing with healthier personalities- at least for me.

Old post, but I am actually the exact opposite. When I'm at work I am my most authentic self. Its part of why I still love to go back and dance whenever I can. Socializing with new people, classmates, professional types... I always feel like a shell of the real me. I have to censor so much about my life, my sarcastic sense of humor, personality...all of it. This just adds to the the general/social anxiety that I have in the first place since I always feel like I am going to offend someone. I am definitely pretty hermit like and am moreso when I have to deal with new people on a regular basis.

Violethollywood
02-09-2018, 06:58 AM
Currently i legit haven't left the house since January 3rd��♀️

Ifyouseekamy
02-12-2018, 01:55 AM
^Awe. It’s so cold I don’t blame you. I’ve turned into quite to concern troll here.

WendiStarr
03-06-2018, 09:05 AM
I'm sure this falls into some kind of social phobia thing here.. I hate it when I have to go to the same store more than once a week. I will go out of my way to go elsewhere if possible. I went to Target this weekend because I had to buy something. I had to go there again yesterday since their pharmacy is the closest to me and that's where my prescriptions were sent to. One of my prescriptions wasn't in stock yesterday, so they told me to come back today. They don't have a drive-thru window. You have to actually go in there and they also don't call to let you know when your prescription is ready. Then I realized that I need to buy something else too that I'm almost out of. I might as well buy it there since I'll be there anyways. I'm dreading going back in there today. I know I have to but I'm just annoyed at having to go back in there. I feel like I've been to that store too many times and they're going to think I'm some weirdo. #thejoysofsocialanxiety

Violethollywood
03-06-2018, 09:55 AM
i order everything online. EVERYTHING. my bf gets stuff from the store here and there but he's not always reliable tbh. So im like i'll just order it off amazon or whatever. i think as of now it's been 2 weeks since ive been out of the house. idk my days kind of run together, it might have been longer lol. it has definitely affected me socially . i used to work a regular job before i lost it and i used to drive everyday. i haven't driven since june or july 2016. so close to 2 years. oh well.

_Elle_
03-06-2018, 10:02 PM
I also order everythingggg online. I even have produce delivered to my door. I leave for class or work when I need to but that is so mentally draining I really don't like going out otherwise if I can help it. Social/general anxiety.

Violethollywood
03-07-2018, 08:54 AM
oooh. I've thought of using the local grocery delivery service here but i haven't gotten to that yet since my bf does the grocery shopping haha. if we ever break up im sure id use it lol. i hate going to any social setting, it's so draining now for me especially since with my work no one knows what i do except for a few friends, so i can't be authentic. like around my bf's family i have to lie and say i work in marketing but then they get nosey as fuck and i go blank and have to think of a lie . lol.

_Elle_
03-07-2018, 10:57 AM
Ughhh yeah. My school is like an office setting and I live in the south now so they are even more uptight. I cannot talk about my real life AT ALL.... which is far more exhausting to me than stripping. I cringe every time one of my teams wants to go out for drinks or some other team bonding bullshit.

R-209
03-07-2018, 01:06 PM
My Safeway got rid of their self-check out lanes. :(
And then I got the chatty stylist when I went for a haircut.

R-209
07-02-2018, 07:12 PM
The most awkward situation? You are walking down the street and see someone walking toward you! The awkwardness increases as you get closer. What the hell are you supposed to do? Say "hello"? Come up with small talk? Nothing at all? Should you wait for them to do something? I don't know.

Hopefully, the other person has a dog.

And Safeway got their self check out lanes back. :)

Glamourmilf
07-06-2018, 08:47 AM
The most awkward situation? You are walking down the street and see someone walking toward you! The awkwardness increases as you get closer. What the hell are you supposed to do? Say "hello"? Come up with small talk? Nothing at all? Should you wait for them to do something? I don't know.

Hopefully, the other person has a dog.

And Safeway got their self check out lanes back. :)

I have to walk by every single unit to get to the parking lot. Ugh!
I never see anyone from my window.... Until I leave my house.
Then, everyone takes that opportunity to 'concidently' check on their garden, walk to the mailbox, whatever.
Just don't talk to me!
I have enough stress in wondering what's waiting for me once I venture out.

xxxGothBarbie
07-31-2018, 11:54 PM
Since I'm pretty much still homeless when not at my bf's house, it kinda forces me to be out & about during most daytime hours & to me it feels like sunlight to a vampire :( I hate being around day people. When I get airbnb rooms , I literally hibernate in there without leaving until checkout time LOL Good for me bc I keep busy with work & cam.

R-209
08-28-2018, 01:53 PM
Another awkward situation:

You are at a red light, waiting to make a right turn.
Cars are beginning to line up behind you.
There is a steady stream of oncoming traffic, with gaps not quite safe enough to make a turn.
A couple minutes go by, the light is still red, and some people have started yelling and/or honking.
It is honestly not safe to turn.
Now some jackass three cars back is screaming at you.
The light is still red.

trustfundkiller
08-28-2018, 02:18 PM
Another awkward situation:

You are at a red light, waiting to make a right turn.
Cars are beginning to line up behind you.
There is a steady stream of oncoming traffic, with gaps not quite safe enough to make a turn.
A couple minutes go by, the light is still red, and some people have started yelling and/or honking.
It is honestly not safe to turn.
Now some jackass three cars back is screaming at you.
The light is still red.
I hate that! I know exactly what you're talking about. People can honk all day. I will stay until I'm comfortable to make the turn. Are they going to pay for a new car/medical bills/increased insurance premium if you get into an accident? No, they'll drive around you. They can wait for 30 seconds until the light is green for everyone. If they're in such a hurry maybe they should learn to manage their time better - lol.