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eagle2
07-08-2019, 12:30 PM
Boredom can be your worst enemy when you're feeling anxious/depressed.

Elektra Luxx
07-08-2019, 01:19 PM
To me boredom is about the worst thing that could happen. I have to keep my mind occupied at all time. I've setup my phone with games, audiobooks, and apps to help me not get bored. Same with my with laptop. Efforts to relieve boredom has got me in the most trouble and put me in the most danger. I've done some really stupid things to not be bored.

R-209
07-09-2019, 10:05 AM
To me boredom is about the worst thing that could happen. I have to keep my mind occupied at all time. I've setup my phone with games, audiobooks, and apps to help me not get bored. Same with my with laptop. Efforts to relieve boredom has got me in the most trouble and put me in the most danger. I've done some really stupid things to not be bored.

I really like a game called Kyodai Mahjongg. Beautiful music, really helps you focus. I just picked it up after a long time and can't get anywhere near my best score.

Glamourmilf
07-30-2019, 06:17 AM
Okay. I'm officially done with going out.
Yep. You heard it first here folks.
It's happened.
I've reached my breaking point.
Yesterday was the last straw.
1. Atm. Nobody in the bank parking lot. Until I get there. Some dude with a big truck decides to pull up RIGHT next to me and park. OMG! You have a million other open parking spaces!
2. CVS. I went in to get 2 things. But, it becomes a game of 'dodge em' just to be in an aisle without someone wanting to suddenly be in there too.:( As SOON as I get to the checkout counter, the magazine refill lady decides THAT'S the time she MUST start filling the rack. That's the only check out open. She can't fill the 4 other racks over THERE?? ARGH! She apologized, but too late.
3. Supermarket. Dead as a door nail. But, as SOON as I go in and start shopping, suddenly people appear. Naturally they come over to whatever I'm looking at, and need to have it too.:-\
4. Drive thru Starbucks. As SOON as I get there, a long line of cars appear and sit behind me.
5. Traffic. Don't get me started on how many drivers just HAVE to get ahead of me, or crowd me in some way.
I'm DONE!
All I can say, is thank God I live in a time where home delivery is an easy option. And that I work from home.:pray:
Because I'm not going to deal with people encroaching on my space anymore.
So sad that it has come to this.
But, my sanity and patience have​ dwindled down to nothing.
*Edit to add: This encroaching starts whenever I go to my car. It seems that all the work trucks and other tenants friends like to park in back of me ( even though I have an assigned spot). They make it difficult to back out, even though there's tons of street parking.
Plus, all the do nothing neighbors want to stop me to talk. I had to put the cabash on that, shortly after I moved in here.
Can anyone else relate?50950
50951

I FINALLY figured out how to make people stay the hell away from my personal space.
I wear a "Make America Great Again" hat.
Wish I knew it was that simple.
Respect.
:)

NitaBaby
07-30-2019, 06:35 AM
^^haha! Swear to god, I get the same reaction when I wear my Black Lives Matter shirt lmaoo. The peace is out of this world.

Glamourmilf
07-31-2019, 07:02 AM
^^haha! Swear to god, I get the same reaction when I wear my Black Lives Matter shirt lmaoo. The peace is out of this world.

I believe it.
What a world we live in.

MistressX
08-04-2019, 07:08 PM
So my hearse broke down a few weeks ago and as a result I havent left the house in 3 weeks. I'm going stir crazy! I get my groceries and things delivered. The only real human contact I've had are the delivery people. I cant even go to the dog park anymore. It was 90% of my real life social interaction. All the 80 year old men who go there in the morning probably think I died cause none of them have Facebook. No real point to me posting this other than venting I guess. I am starting to get a little weird though, like I'm lashing out more at my boyfriend and just being overall very depressive and negative. Maybe I should do yoga or something.

WendiStarr
08-04-2019, 07:28 PM
Am I the only one who goes pretend shopping online when I'm having an anxiety attack? That's if listening to music or masturbation isn't working. It's a good distraction. ThinkGeek and Wayfair are some of my favorite websites for pretend shopping. Amazon works too. I will keep searching for stuff to add to my cart. Once the anxiety is gone, I close my browser.

eagle2
08-04-2019, 07:51 PM
So my hearse broke down a few weeks ago and as a result I havent left the house in 3 weeks. I'm going stir crazy! I get my groceries and things delivered. The only real human contact I've had are the delivery people. I cant even go to the dog park anymore. It was 90% of my real life social interaction. All the 80 year old men who go there in the morning probably think I died cause none of them have Facebook. No real point to me posting this other than venting I guess. I am starting to get a little weird though, like I'm lashing out more at my boyfriend and just being overall very depressive and negative. Maybe I should do yoga or something.

Do you still have your other 2 hearses?

MistressX
08-04-2019, 08:06 PM
Do you still have your other 2 hearses?

I had 4 at one time. I sold 2 and put the oldest one in storage. The Lincoln is the one I was driving daily. It broke down a few weeks ago. Its gonna be too much time and money to repair to daily driver status but I dont want to sell it. It'll just end up in a junkyard. I'm doing ok so far on the 10k minute challenge, and making ok money. If I can keep it up I can buy a car maybe mid september. But that's 6 more weeks of isolation.. :(

eagle2
08-04-2019, 08:19 PM
Can you use Uber or Lyft, or rent a car or another hearse? Maybe call funeral homes and ask if you can rent a hearse on a day when they're not using it.

xxxGothBarbie
08-04-2019, 08:45 PM
I had 4 at one time. I sold 2 and put the oldest one in storage. The Lincoln is the one I was driving daily. It broke down a few weeks ago. Its gonna be too much time and money to repair to daily driver status but I dont want to sell it. It'll just end up in a junkyard. I'm doing ok so far on the 10k minute challenge, and making ok money. If I can keep it up I can buy a car maybe mid september. But that's 6 more weeks of isolation.. :(

When I start getting stir crazy I end up going out goth clubbing /drinking which quells my need to break out of the house & interact with ppl. Haven't been out in a while myself & am starting to feel it blah. I love that you have hearses :) <3

Glamourmilf
08-05-2019, 11:09 AM
So my hearse broke down a few weeks ago and as a result I havent left the house in 3 weeks. I'm going stir crazy! I get my groceries and things delivered. The only real human contact I've had are the delivery people. I cant even go to the dog park anymore. It was 90% of my real life social interaction. All the 80 year old men who go there in the morning probably think I died cause none of them have Facebook. No real point to me posting this other than venting I guess. I am starting to get a little weird though, like I'm lashing out more at my boyfriend and just being overall very depressive and negative. Maybe I should do yoga or something.

Getting cabin fever myself.
Being in a.c. 24/7 is a mind fuck.
115 degrees outside. Not even cool enough to go for a walk.

eagle2
08-05-2019, 05:34 PM
Is there a swimming pool you can go to?

Glamourmilf
08-06-2019, 08:44 AM
Is there a swimming pool you can go to?
Thank You.
All of my friends have pools.
But, the water is hot as piss.
Yesterday broke a record for being the hottest day of the year....120.
It's August, so that's pretty typical.
What I'm thinking of doing, is spraying the hose on me.
But, the water is probably hot, because all of the water that comes out of my faucets is warm.
I just keep reminding me, "This too shall pass."

eagle2
08-06-2019, 12:03 PM
If the water in the swimming pools is too hot, maybe if you bought a few bags of ice at a convenience store and emptied them in the pool, it would cool the water.

R-209
08-06-2019, 04:31 PM
As part of my ongoing war to get my elliptical fixed, I left multiple voice mails (unanswered) and then engaged in another hour-long call with tech support. I am drained. I hate the way my voice sounds on the phone, especially when I'm trying to sound civil despite being very pissed. I posted part of the story in Body Business, including the repair guy they sent seven times, each time failing to fix the machine. I'm uncomfortable whenever any repair person visits, but this guy was creepy as hell and acted BIZARRELY. I kept my phone out, ready to dial 911. This was in my HOME.
The support guy I talked with was very polite and I actually felt a bit guilty for being so harsh, even though I know I'm absolutely in the right. It's hard to be assertive and say something like "I don't care if you think he's a nice guy, his behavior was far beyond unprofessional and he should not be allowed in other people's homes."
Anyway, here's my incredibly long review of the elliptical (https://amzn.to/2KjZz27). Feel free to scroll down and click "helpful."
I didn't get into the creepy guy out of libel concerns, since I can't prove anything.

Is it part of SA to be afraid of hurting the feelings of a soulless corporation?

Glamourmilf
08-07-2019, 07:31 AM
If the water in the swimming pools is too hot, maybe if you bought a few bags of ice at a convenience store and emptied them in the pool, it would cool the water.

Lol!
You're adorable.
:-*
I wish that would cool the water down.
Very wealthy people, and some 5 star hotels will hire a company to deliver huge chunks of ice to drop in the pool.
I'm going to check to see if any of them around here do that.
Will report back.

whirlerz
08-07-2019, 08:13 AM
As part of my ongoing war to get my elliptical fixed, I left multiple voice mails (unanswered) and then engaged in another hour-long call with tech support. I am drained. I hate the way my voice sounds on the phone, especially when I'm trying to sound civil despite being very pissed. I posted part of the story in Body Business, including the repair guy they sent seven times, each time failing to fix the machine. I'm uncomfortable whenever any repair person visits, but this guy was creepy as hell and acted BIZARRELY. I kept my phone out, ready to dial 911. This was in my HOME.
The support guy I talked with was very polite and I actually felt a bit guilty for being so harsh, even though I know I'm absolutely in the right. It's hard to be assertive and say something like "I don't care if you think he's a nice guy, his behavior was far beyond unprofessional and he should not be allowed in other people's homes."
Anyway, here's my incredibly long review of the elliptical (https://amzn.to/2KjZz27). Feel free to scroll down and click "helpful."
I didn't get into the creepy guy out of libel concerns, since I can't prove anything.

Is it part of SA to be afraid of hurting the feelings of a soulless corporation?

Can you contact Amazon about this? Or, http://www.bbb.org ?? Attny Gen.'s office?
Sorry, I hope can get it resolved!

CFMNH44
08-07-2019, 09:59 AM
As part of my ongoing war to get my elliptical fixed, I left multiple voice mails (unanswered) and then engaged in another hour-long call with tech support. I am drained. I hate the way my voice sounds on the phone, especially when I'm trying to sound civil despite being very pissed. I posted part of the story in Body Business, including the repair guy they sent seven times, each time failing to fix the machine. I'm uncomfortable whenever any repair person visits, but this guy was creepy as hell and acted BIZARRELY. I kept my phone out, ready to dial 911. This was in my HOME.
The support guy I talked with was very polite and I actually felt a bit guilty for being so harsh, even though I know I'm absolutely in the right. It's hard to be assertive and say something like "I don't care if you think he's a nice guy, his behavior was far beyond unprofessional and he should not be allowed in other people's homes."
Anyway, here's my incredibly long review of the elliptical (https://amzn.to/2KjZz27). Feel free to scroll down and click "helpful."
I didn't get into the creepy guy out of libel concerns, since I can't prove anything.

Is it part of SA to be afraid of hurting the feelings of a soulless corporation?

After 7 attempts to fix, I would be asking for a replacement. ... and with a cc to the BBB, State Attorney General, FTC, local news station, ... you get the idea! ;-)

R-209
08-07-2019, 01:48 PM
Can you contact Amazon about this? Or, http://www.bbb.org ?? Attny Gen.'s office?
Sorry, I hope can get it resolved!


After 7 attempts to fix, I would be asking for a replacement. ... and with a cc to the BBB, State Attorney General, FTC, local news station, ... you get the idea! ;-)

They replaced the thing after seeing my Amazon review. It broke while the installer was still at my house. Instead of replacing it again, they sent super creepy out a few more times. Finally they replaced it once more, and this one made it three days before it broke. I began to think that there may be a electrical problem on my end (even though no one mentioned this in two years), so I plugged an old laptop into the same outlet and left it running for a week without incident. Just to be sure, I got a multimeter and it showed no problem. I asked three different people at Sole if it was safe to plug the replacement in. They all said yes. So now I'm stuck with more bullshit. They were supposed to have someone other than super creepy come out but of course I haven't heard anything. They'll probably fall back on their old story about him being the only one available.

I did go the whole AG/BBB, etc. route way back when this started. It got me nowhere. In the AG response, the first tech just lied his ass off and basically said I was too stupid to work the machine. I also contacted this organization (https://www.sueweavercause.org/about//), which promotes screening and safety checks for in-home service workers.

whirlerz
08-07-2019, 02:50 PM
I'm so sorry!
Wow, they sound so ignorant!
I'd still push for my $ back, that is so f'd up!

We have Angie's List, I think it's for rating service people, but maybe they can refer you to someone?

R-209
08-07-2019, 08:45 PM
I'm so sorry!
Wow, they sound so ignorant!
I'd still push for my $ back, that is so f'd up!?

Thing is, I actually really like the machine in the windows of time it works. Sole machines seem to get pretty good reviews. If I could just get a repair guy who is remotely competent and maybe somewhat professional...

Thinking back, I'm less impressed with the guy I called "polite" before.

whirlerz
08-08-2019, 05:36 AM
Thing is, I actually really like the machine in the windows of time it works. Sole machines seem to get pretty good reviews. If I could just get a repair guy who is remotely competent and maybe somewhat professional...

Thinking back, I'm less impressed with the guy I called "polite" before.

Well, I sure hope you can get it resolved..
I'd be all over Amazon's Ass..

Trust me, I understand, I fought w/a co. for a year, over $50.00! I got it resolved tho}:D
W/me, there's absolutely NO chill, I.do.not.let. it go
!
Good luck hon.

slowpoke
08-08-2019, 07:42 AM
Thank You.
All of my friends have pools.
But, the water is hot as piss.
Yesterday broke a record for being the hottest day of the year....120.
It's August, so that's pretty typical.
What I'm thinking of doing, is spraying the hose on me.
But, the water is probably hot, because all of the water that comes out of my faucets is warm.
I just keep reminding me, "This too shall pass."


Patience.

Come January, you will be wishing the water were warmer.

Glamourmilf
08-09-2019, 07:57 AM
Patience.

Come January, you will be wishing the water were warmer.




I don't swim, so it's not an issue.
Although during the winter, I do love being in a Jacuzzi, when it's 50 degrees and freezing.
I guess everyone missed my point.
I can't go outside, open my window, sit in my yard, get into my car, without burning myself.
It's just something I need to get used to, is all.
Living at the coast, most of my adult life didn't prepare me for this.
*I'm elated that the temps are dropping to 105 this weekend.
Sweater weather. :cold:

JessaJade
08-10-2019, 03:20 PM
51720

Glamourmilf
08-15-2019, 07:27 AM
Every year, around this time, I start thinking about getting a part time job, because camming is so slow.
Add to that my cabin fever from staying inside because it's too hot to go outside.
I was at a thrift store yesterday, ( maybe that's a place I'd like to work?)
I was observing the people who work there.
Talking nonstop to each other.
The customers coming up to me, asking what I thought of items they wanted to buy. ( That happens wherever I go.)
Random strangers want to chat.
Ugh!
As I was leaving, this guy said hello, and asked if my name was Ronald?
Wait. What?
Do I look like a man? In a dress with huge titty's?
No. He said that he was meeting someone for a business meeting, and didn't know what he looked like.
Just an excuse to talk to me.
Dude, it's 120 degrees out here.
Fuck off!
It's all too much.
Couldn't wait to get home.
I'm not going to be able to work anywhere but from home.

whirlerz
08-15-2019, 08:26 AM
Lol.
Sorry that happened..
Which's why I go to the stores @ opening times only.
No guarantees tho.

Girly_Girl
08-15-2019, 08:44 AM
Every year, around this time, I start thinking about getting a part time job, because camming is so slow.
Add to that my cabin fever from staying inside because it's too hot to go outside.
I was at a thrift store yesterday, ( maybe that's a place I'd like to work?)
I was observing the people who work there.
Talking nonstop to each other.
The customers coming up to me, asking what I thought of items they wanted to buy. ( That happens wherever I go.)
Random strangers want to chat.
Ugh!
As I was leaving, this guy said hello, and asked if my name was Ronald?
Wait. What?
Do I look like a man? In a dress with huge titty's?
No. He said that he was meeting someone for a business meeting, and didn't know what he looked like.
Just an excuse to talk to me.
Dude, it's 120 degrees out here.
Fuck off!
It's all too much.
Couldn't wait to get home.
I'm not going to be able to work anywhere but from home.

the heat fried his brain....lol

Girly_Girl
08-15-2019, 09:05 AM
I've gotten to where I never want to go anywhere which is VERY unlike me ;( I used to have to get out of the house almost everyday even if it was to just go up the road to the store. I don't even enjoy going to the mall anymore.

Idk if it's depression or what? Just typing this is making me tear up cause I never used to be this way EVER. Hell I dont even want a bf and I used to be the type that always had to have a bf, I have all kinds of offers, just do not want one...would rather be single but at the same time I get lonely too. I went thru menopause about a year or two ago, idk if thats what happened to me or what?

R-209
08-18-2019, 04:03 PM
You know how you feel embarrassed when you stumble over your words? I started paying attention to how often TV news anchors mess up, and I found that they do- a lot. These are people who went to school to learn how to talk in front of a camera, some having decades of experience. Anderson Cooper makes a gaffe that I wold beat myself up over, but he just keeps on going. I try to keep this in mind whenever I have to talk to someone at Safeway.

R-209
08-24-2019, 02:35 PM
Speaking of stumbling over words... I have a schoolboy crush on my vet. She just called with my cat's test results (all good!) and I was like "Durrrr." She knows me well enough that she probably suspects the anxiety disorder.

R-209
08-26-2019, 11:22 AM
Methods of Social Interaction Ranked by Level of Discomfort

1. Phone (x10 if you have to leave a voice mail)
2. Texting/Messaging (expectation of immediacy, high probability of typos)
3. In person (varies depending on person)
4. Forum (risk of misinterpretations)
5. E-mail
6. Postal letter

Glamourmilf
08-29-2019, 09:11 AM
Is there a swimming pool you can go to?
Went to a pool at one of the casinos yesterday.
It was lovely.
I was invited by one of the guests.
When I asked the manager if locals can use the pool, she said yes.
For a day fee of $50 /:O
If I want a cabana, that will be $100:O
I looked at her like she was crazy.
She said, "But if you invite 4 other people, that will only be $20 a piece."
4 other people?
Kill me now.
I want to be ALONE!!!

R-209
09-04-2019, 04:59 PM
I was out for my morning walk. It is rare to encounter other people, so I was caught off guard when a nice older couple walking their dog called "Good morning!" My brain raced to formulate a proper response. It settled on "Hello," which I'm not sure was the right one. I believed the ordeal to be concluded, but then the gentleman asked "How are you doing?" I hate this question as it involves lying. My brain came up with "Good." There was an awkward silence, so I took a risk and said "I like your dog." "Thanks," the man said. And that was that.

I congratulated myself on successfully navigating this unexpected interaction. Four seconds later, my brain said "I think you sounded creepy/sarcastic on that last part. And you probably should have replied with 'good morning' instead of 'hello,' after all."

And that's how my socially anxious brain works.

R-209
09-07-2019, 01:36 PM
Got a new library card today with little difficulty. :party:


Oops, I think I may be posting too much in this thread...

Elektra Luxx
09-12-2019, 02:12 PM
I use the Libby app. Your phone number is your library card number and it connects you to your local library. You have access to to ebooks, audiobooks, magazines pretty much anything the library has on e format.

R-209
09-12-2019, 06:47 PM
I use the Libby app. Your phone number is your library card number and it connects you to your local library. You have access to to ebooks, audiobooks, magazines pretty much anything the library has on e format.

Got it! Currently reading "A Storm of Swords" but might take a break for something a little different after that.

Glamourmilf
09-13-2019, 08:21 AM
I use the Libby app. Your phone number is your library card number and it connects you to your local library. You have access to to ebooks, audiobooks, magazines pretty much anything the library has on e format.
Wow, thank you!
I never knew that.
This is going to save me from actually going in to the library, which I hate.

R-209
09-15-2019, 09:35 AM
Okay, so I've been more active on Twitter and it's making me almost as anxious as real-life interactions. I've had a sudden burst of followers and replies and am a bit overwhelmed. So, a few etiquette questions:
1) Should I follow everyone who follows me? It seems like good manners but my timeline is already cluttered and I don't have anything in common with some. I could mute them, but what if they reply to a post or ask something? Then I'll look like an asshole.
2) When is it appropriate to send a DM? Some say "never." I've sent mostly cat pictures, but certain subjects are better discussed in private. Maybe I should ask permission first?
3) I see a post that I want to respond to, but it was written 10 seconds ago. Does replying quickly make me look like a creeper or should I wait a few minutes?

Elektra Luxx
09-15-2019, 08:50 PM
^^^
I used to have a Twitter account but deleted it because I was getting too many weird requests. Plus I didn't have a lot if followers either. So that said.

I didn't follow everyone that follows me. I checked their account, if it's not private, to see if I like their posts before I followed them back.

I think it's okay to DM someone as long as you're not asking for something like their real information or a nude. I think most are okay sharing general information.

I don't think it's creepy to answer right away either.

Jassi
09-22-2019, 11:51 AM
My hermit mode comes and goes.
If my anxiety is crazy, I don't want to be around too many people.
I do manage to go out though. Lately I don't go out because I can't afford to do anything.
I've checked out some museum exhibits that aren't expensive, just I have to get there with a lyft.
I had a scary incindent at my job a few weeks ago, and it set off my panic alarms.
So now I'm anxious. I work in retail and we have high end fragrance. A drug addict was trying to steal some Chanel Fragrance and it was just me and my co-worker-the boss was on an errand. That was the 2nd drug addict that came in that day-the first guy I wasn't sure if he was just wandering in, but the 2nd one was trying to steal.
He didn't, my co-worker and I maintained our cool but he was scary. We both thought he was going to smash the case and grab and run.
I need a different job, this happens too often and it's not worth the stress. Until then, I'm grateful to have a steady paycheck.
I enjoy going out and socializing, when I'm not anxious. It happens, I can calm myself down and go outside and have a good day.
It's when some incident triggers me, like the drug addict in the store a few weeks ago that I cannot be around anyone.

Jassi
09-22-2019, 12:00 PM
Okay, so I've been more active on Twitter and it's making me almost as anxious as real-life interactions. I've had a sudden burst of followers and replies and am a bit overwhelmed. So, a few etiquette questions:
1) Should I follow everyone who follows me? It seems like good manners but my timeline is already cluttered and I don't have anything in common with some. I could mute them, but what if they reply to a post or ask something? Then I'll look like an asshole.
2) When is it appropriate to send a DM? Some say "never." I've sent mostly cat pictures, but certain subjects are better discussed in private. Maybe I should ask permission first?
3) I see a post that I want to respond to, but it was written 10 seconds ago. Does replying quickly make me look like a creeper or should I wait a few minutes?

I still don't get Twitter LOL, but I have about 700 followers
I don't use it for a business, I just joined years ago and got followers after hashtagging some music related stuff.
Social Media can increase anxiety.
It's a different world now with it.
It shouldn't be taken so seriously, which most adults don't. It's the kids and teenagers growing up with it now that are affected the worse, in my opinion. I didn't have to think about how many followers or friends I had when I was growing up. Online bullying is as common as the bully in the hallway at school.
Social media can be fun, and most businesses use social media to reach more customers.
It has a dark side to it as well. I try not to take it seriously, considering my already anxious nature

R-209
11-16-2019, 10:42 AM
Tips for being more assertive? Example: during my epic fight with the company that made my piece of shit elliptical, there were so many times when I wanted to say something like "Fuck you. Fix the fucking machine fucking NOW or I'm suing you and getting a fucking restraining order against that fucking creepy-ass technician you keep sending to my house."

But I'm more likely to say "Golly gosh, I really don't mind the 2.5 year wait. I'm sure you'll get it worked out soon!"

I did write a very stern letter, but kept changing parts that were "too mean."

R-209
11-26-2019, 09:32 AM
Has anyone been to a Toastmasters meeting? My doctor is insisting I try it.

eagle2
11-28-2019, 09:21 PM
Tips for being more assertive? Example: during my epic fight with the company that made my piece of shit elliptical, there were so many times when I wanted to say something like "Fuck you. Fix the fucking machine fucking NOW or I'm suing you and getting a fucking restraining order against that fucking creepy-ass technician you keep sending to my house."

But I'm more likely to say "Golly gosh, I really don't mind the 2.5 year wait. I'm sure you'll get it worked out soon!"

I did write a very stern letter, but kept changing parts that were "too mean."

Is there anyone you could practice with? Maybe have a friend pretend to be a representative of the company that made your piece of shit elliptical. If not, practice by yourself. Keep leaving yourself a voicemail of what you want to say, until you're comfortable saying it.

minniesoporno
11-29-2019, 02:23 PM
I work from home, and I got myself a boyfriend and right now I am paying off debt and need to save for retirement age, and maybe one day a buy a house. so yes I am busy. my family don't think I am busy but I am 35 in 2020 so damn it i am busy.

this adulthood is hard, because between handling your finances, and making sure you are hitting adulthood milestones, you are either busy or staying home because it's just easier.

There are plenty of places out there to socialize and make a friend there is always a Church that needs volunteers. or some organization that needs volunteers. If you want to make yourself busy being around people there are plenty of things out there to do.

I've come to the conclusion if I am really lonely I will become a member of a local church. I see the older Caribbean ladies on the bus all the time with a church friend. so I am like ok I can do that when I really need a friend.

You don't want to suffer with mental illnesses if you think you are experiencing one you need to get that managed then stabilized. and when you are in therapy you can believe your therapist if they are good one they will ask you if you are getting out of the house , they will have a list of suggestions for you to do.

R-209
12-05-2019, 04:06 PM
Is there anyone you could practice with? Maybe have a friend pretend to be a representative of the company that made your piece of shit elliptical. If not, practice by yourself. Keep leaving yourself a voicemail of what you want to say, until you're comfortable saying it.

One problem is knowing the line between being right and sounding like a dick, especially when I can't prove my accusations. If I say "This repair asshole is probably going to end up killing someone," it sounds like I'm exaggerating and the complaint probably gets back to the guy, who knows where I live. On the last phone call, I did finally push back hard and told them I was sick of their bullshit.

It's difficult when writing online, too. I can truthfully post that the machine is "dangerous" and that the repair guy "made me fear for my life" and run the risk of getting sued.

Elektra Luxx
12-21-2019, 10:19 AM
^^^
Manipulation 101 - you need to be nice to people to get them to do what you want them to do.

It takes practice, planning and preparation. It's a not chess match, you're fixing the situation to fall in your favor.

I think you need to resist the urge to be rude (at first) when you're trying to get someone to do what you want them to do. Honey versus vinegar. There are times when you have to be rude and for some people that's their goto and it works for them, but for me and I suspect you, we will just come across as rude and the other person will just shutdown and you won't being able to get what you want.

Being assertive is not about being loud or rude.

Example, go to your favorite fast food place and you're going to get one of the counter people to give you something for free. Fries, a drink, whatever. It has to be the same person and take many visit as you need. Be careful not to be creepy. You're just making that person like you enough to give you something for free (or at discount would be alright too).

BTW, I don't think Toastmasters is a good idea.