View Full Version : Do you ever feel really, really unattractive?
xxxGothBarbie
06-23-2015, 03:40 PM
OMG, NOOOOOOO!!!:O. You will fuck up your bowel, dear! Laxatives should NEVER be taken that much..you can add fiber to your diet w/Metemucil, it comes in powder & now wafer form.
I drink coconut water w/aloe..there's all kinds of stuff, chia, flax seeds..
Do you want to end up w/a colestmy bag???
O please stop doing that!
I don't take them everyday , I was just saying if you take 3 at once it'll clean you out right then, but hell no I won't take them that often.
zoezoebelle
06-30-2015, 02:19 AM
Nope, I've honestly never felt that way. I don't give a flying fuck how I look most days, and will go out in sweatpants, flipflops and a t-shirt with no bra or makeup. Nobody seems to mind. Perhaps if you spent a week being a total slob in public you'd stop worrying about it.
HoolaTwister
06-30-2015, 07:16 AM
^^ I have body dysmorphia, ocd and probably pmdd. I wish this were as easy to overcome by just not giving a fuck and wearing sweatpants hah....though I'll give it a try ;)
ScarletKitten
06-30-2015, 07:38 AM
When I was an awkward teen, yeah I worried about how I looked. Now I either don't care or I know I look good.
Practice falling in love with yourself in the mirror. Sounds narcissistic, but it's actually a beautiful, liberating, and fun experience. lol :)
why the hell not? if you can't fall in love with yourself, then who will? :biggrin:
HoolaTwister
06-30-2015, 07:42 AM
^^ That's a great point! I've got to learn to love myself.
Kellydancer
06-30-2015, 01:30 PM
Yes. I can't even look at photos without judging myself. I avoid photos lately because of it. I've put on weight and it bothers me. I'm not fat but not thin and it's driving me nuts. When I would get rejected by men (especially online)I blamed my looks. Years ago I was convinced I was ugly. I wasn't but felt that way at times.
SnuffleUffleGrass
06-30-2015, 06:59 PM
OK comically my work uniform makes me look horrible. I think it's a good thing b/c I work with a lot of lonely, horny guys- the last thing I need is drama at work getting me fired or laid off.
So yeah, at this point in life, I feel like a cat dressed up in ugly doll clothes at work. It helps me get into the right frame of mind for work though....
Cashmere Star
07-03-2015, 02:22 PM
In front of the mirror damn I have a fine face, in the photos however nooo
charlie61
07-04-2015, 07:10 PM
In front of the mirror damn I have a fine face, in the photos however nooo
Yeah, taking selfies gives me serious complexes about my face...especially my teeth (which aren't perfect, but are very white and look totally fine in person). My smile in pictures looks so fucked to me, but it looks fine when I see it in mirrors, and people compliment me on it all of the time...
Genoveve
07-04-2015, 07:30 PM
^^Tell me about it. I see a huge difference in my teeth after a month of braces but when I go to take pictures of the progress they still look janky as fuck, what I see in the mirror and what I see in pictures is like night and day. And even before the braces it was the same story; in person I didn't think they looked *that* bad but it was when I'd see them in pics and videos that I'd be like 'Jesus Christ!!!'
As far as being unphotogenic it just comes down to bone structure; some types of bone structure just photograph better than others. I think nice cheekbones are what is most likely to make someone look good in photographs. I have a narrow face, weak chin and a crooked nose so it's a selfie nightmare.
Aurora_Sunset
07-04-2015, 07:39 PM
Yes, pictures/videos are the devil.... I'm short and slightly chubby for my height. But... when you're short, you just get used to your short perspective. Everything looks perfectly normal and proportional in the mirror. A few weeks ago, even after losing 10 pounds and thinking I looked good, I let someone video me and watching it back, I'm like "Good god! That weight does not sit well on such a short frame!" Ugh... it made me feel gross to see it from an objective perspective. :(
Elektra Luxx
07-05-2015, 12:38 PM
Yeah, taking selfies gives me serious complexes about my face...especially my teeth (which aren't perfect, but are very white and look totally fine in person). My smile in pictures looks so fucked to me, but it looks fine when I see it in mirrors, and people compliment me on it all of the time...
I think a have an ok smile most times, but in pictures I make this horse toothed smile. SCARY!!! (Cue horse winnie sound)
carmen_b
07-05-2015, 03:16 PM
Stand up and face the camera at a 3/4 angle . Also, have video taken a few inches above your eye level. If anyone is on camera with you, stand 1-2 inches behind them. The trick is slight but you'll look a little smaller by comparison.
Heels are great too obviously to elongate just like dancing. Make sure your clothes fit perfectly too if you need really perfect looking video.
Most body types are best at that advice above except for the very thin or men who are trying to look larger .
Yes, pictures/videos are the devil.... I'm short and slightly chubby for my height. But... when you're short, you just get used to your short perspective. Everything looks perfectly normal and proportional in the mirror. A few weeks ago, even after losing 10 pounds and thinking I looked good, I let someone video me and watching it back, I'm like "Good god! That weight does not sit well on such a short frame!" Ugh... it made me feel gross to see it from an objective perspective. :(
xStacey
07-08-2015, 11:20 AM
^^Tell me about it. I see a huge difference in my teeth after a month of braces but when I go to take pictures of the progress they still look janky as fuck, what I see in the mirror and what I see in pictures is like night and day. And even before the braces it was the same story; in person I didn't think they looked *that* bad but it was when I'd see them in pics and videos that I'd be like 'Jesus Christ!!!'
As far as being unphotogenic it just comes down to bone structure; some types of bone structure just photograph better than others. I think nice cheekbones are what is most likely to make someone look good in photographs. I have a narrow face, weak chin and a crooked nose so it's a selfie nightmare.
It's really strange actually... I had braces and in front of the mirror or at my orthodontist's office my teeth look great but on pictures... :-X the top front teeth look slightly crooked and not perfectly aligned to the bottom teeth. When comes the time to tell my ortho what's wrong in person, he just can't see it and then he hands me the mirror and I don't either but on some pictures...!! I have a follow-up in a month maybe I should show him the selfies I took lol.
Cashmere Star
07-08-2015, 02:08 PM
Yeah, taking selfies gives me serious complexes about my face...especially my teeth (which aren't perfect, but are very white and look totally fine in person). My smile in pictures looks so fucked to me, but it looks fine when I see it in mirrors, and people compliment me on it all of the time...
ikr!!!! This is a huge problem for me at the moment because I am trying to take good selfies for keepsake, for online, and sugaring sites but my camera sucks and my photo skills suck. So... I am hunting for photographers to do boudoir and normal photoshoots with. I want to get new/student photographers who are trying to build their portfolio so it's cheaper/free but craigslist is shady as fuck and I don't know any artsy people anymore. ;_;
On the other hand, I've seen girls and guys who look cute in photos, but in real life they're.... (I've seen this a lot in art school HAHA it must be their photoshop skills)
MyRealNameIsWeird
07-16-2015, 02:05 AM
This is so stupid but I feel it affects my life so much.
So, most of the time I feel ok and attractive. I make a good living off my looks and am meticulous about my appearance. But sometimes, wow, I feel so ugly and disgusting I can't even leave the house. I know it's always right around the time of my period and my anxiety and depression amplify times a million. I say to myself "It's just hormones, you're not really disgusting and gross." But at those times my feeling feel very very real. I cover all the mirrors, I can barley take a shower, can't hold a conversation, can't look people in the eye, no way can I look in the mirror to put on make up etc. I have told several therapists about this and they just look at me like "You're being silly!" Ughhhhh. I literally can't function.
Does anyone else ever feel this way?
I get this. With me it's a combination of mild BDD (which most women have, btw, there's no shame in it) and bipolar. Hormones plus dysmorphia plus a depressive bout equals very bad self image. I used to spend days not wanting to go out and dressing frumpy to hide myself. Now I take pictures of myself and weigh and measure myself when I feel great. That way I can redo the tests when I am feeling bad and tell myself "looks like I'm just the same as last week and I was happy with it then". It helps a lot to have that perspective. Lots of love.
HoolaTwister
07-16-2015, 06:32 AM
I get this. With me it's a combination of mild BDD (which most women have, btw, there's no shame in it) and bipolar. Hormones plus dysmorphia plus a depressive bout equals very bad self image. I used to spend days not wanting to go out and dressing frumpy to hide myself. Now I take pictures of myself and weigh and measure myself when I feel great. That way I can redo the tests when I am feeling bad and tell myself "looks like I'm just the same as last week and I was happy with it then". It helps a lot to have that perspective. Lots of love.
Thank you. It means a lot to know I'm not alone (though I wouldn't wish this upon anyone) xo
HoolaTwister
07-16-2015, 06:35 AM
I get this. With me it's a combination of mild BDD (which most women have, btw, there's no shame in it) and bipolar. Hormones plus dysmorphia plus a depressive bout equals very bad self image. I used to spend days not wanting to go out and dressing frumpy to hide myself. Now I take pictures of myself and weigh and measure myself when I feel great. That way I can redo the tests when I am feeling bad and tell myself "looks like I'm just the same as last week and I was happy with it then". It helps a lot to have that perspective. Lots of love.
Thank you. It means a lot to know I'm not alone (though I wouldn't wish this upon anyone) xo
charlie61
07-16-2015, 04:19 PM
Whenever I stop working out for even just a week (like during times when I'm busy with moving, traveling, or whatever), I go from feeling super confident to feeling horrible about my appearance. I don't even want to leave the apartment! And when I feel crappy about how I look, I get a case of the fuck-its. I start eating more food, start eating less healthily, etc. Blaaaaah...
Cashmere Star
07-16-2015, 05:16 PM
I feel unattractive sometimes, but then I look down at the wad of bills in my hands and feel pretty again lol. If men are paying for me I can't be that bad.
I did the photoshoot a few days ago and... I am sort of scared to see how weird I'll turn out lol
Thinking of finding photographers on craigslist but I am scared of serial killers and human traffickers so..
*~*Zorn*~*
07-16-2015, 05:49 PM
Wow... I'm glad for this thread. Sometimes I feel alone - especially since strippers hide their insecurities so well.. My parents were always good to me in the looks department - even when I argued that they were wrong. I had gotten bullied in school so badly I hated myself. I felt so ugly - and it carried through the rest of my life. When I first started getting attention from guys - they weren't nice. Most of them weren't. They would treat me like I was some kind of "practice girl" - not the beautiful conquests they really wanted. It got so that even though I knew how they really felt about me - I felt somehow "lucky" to have gotten any attention at all. Right now I'm trying to lose baby weight. I was in the best shape of my life before I got pregnant with my second - my core is zapped - I was doing master class level moves on the pole - and right now I can't even kick up into an invert from the floor! I'm lucky if I get half way up. I still have stretch marks even if they ar fading - they're still there. Doing everything I can short of starving myself to get my weight down - and I can't crash diet because I'm nursing. No fat burners for me either... :-/ I like actually having boobs for once - but what good are they when the rest of me sucks rig now. And I almost don't want to stop pumping ever because I don't want them to shrink back and possibly get even smaller than they were before. I can't afford a boob job right now.. It's all I can do to go to the dermatologist for micro, and injections once in a while - just so I can better compete with the little girls in the club - even though I'm only in my early 30's.. It's frustrating. Thank fucking God I'm not getting my period right now - I'm HORRIBLE when I have PMS...! Breast feeding is great for so many reasons.. Even without PMS though.. Yea.. All I can think about is getting back in shape just so I CAN work.. And then when I do - I have to pretend. I don't always feel so terribly about myself - but It happens a lot.. As strippers we do a lot of pretending don't we...? Thank you for this thread. I don't like to see anyone down themselves - but it makes me feel a little less crazy seeing all these girls who are so beautiful feeling as insecure about themselves as I do. xoxo
kaninchen
07-16-2015, 06:04 PM
Today was rough beauty-wise. I haven't tanned, shaved, or worked out in a week, so I feel like a flabby hairy salamander. I'm reminding myself that these little details are minor, that all I need to do is hit the gym and primp and I'll be back to normal. I feel like keeping myself in tip-top Barbie shape for too long actually makes me more insecure, because then when I do have tangible faults, I have no coping mechanisms for them.
charlie61
07-16-2015, 07:26 PM
Today was rough beauty-wise. I haven't tanned, shaved, or worked out in a week, so I feel like a flabby hairy salamander. I'm reminding myself that these little details are minor, that all I need to do is hit the gym and primp and I'll be back to normal. I feel like keeping myself in tip-top Barbie shape for too long actually makes me more insecure, because then when I do have tangible faults, I have no coping mechanisms for them.
Couldn't agree more. And I'm right there with ya today!
Flickdreams
07-20-2015, 11:18 AM
^ yup, no room to move.
kaninchen
07-22-2015, 05:59 PM
I feel like Jabba the Hutt. Stupid period!
kortneykay
08-17-2015, 10:32 AM
Occasionally and I know it's personally because of self-hate vs. self-love. I'm learning to love myself but it's hard especially when my body and face is changing due to my weight loss journey. I definitely feel a lot prettier with make up on. The guys that occasionally bullied me in high school used to secretly try and fuck me too so I knew I had "something" they wanted. I knew if I simply studied men, I could seduce them to get what I want. It sort of made me into a femme fatale. Now I'm trying to sculpt myself into the woman I want to be which means giving myself a chance and trying to love me.
KaraLynn
08-17-2015, 02:41 PM
Too often.
Daniellaa
08-21-2015, 07:49 AM
Yes! I obsess over the way I look. I'll start the day out feeling good about my body but then if I eat too much or eat to the point of my stomach feeling full I suddenly feel like I look fat. And logically I know you don't suddenly gain 20 pounds from eating one large meal or one cupcake but when im feeling that way all logic goes out the window and I will see like a literally 20 pound difference on myself in the span of a day. I'll stare at myself in the mirror from absolutely every angle and find things that look weird to me and obsess over it. It really sucks. Its nice to read about other people going through the same thing but it makes me feel so sorry for everyone too cuz its such an awful feeling and I wouldn't wish it on anybody.
michele11
09-08-2015, 03:12 PM
Yes. Right now! I haven't been able to work out like I use to in over 3 years. I'm lucky I'm skinny but I bought some short out fits( two piece gowns have been my thing about 6 years) and I've always been known for my ass ans legs and I wanna cry. I hate the way they look! I sent pics and people say I look good but I'm not walking around like that. And i hate my skinny lower face and my implants are looking smaller. i'm not going to look in the mirror until my trip! Why did I buy this stupid short stuff?! because my new travel friend wears it and I thought it'd look good on me?!?
*~*Zorn*~*
09-09-2015, 03:53 PM
Yea... Right now me too. I'm revisiting this thread because I'm feeling especially frustrated. My little girl is 5 months as of yesterday - but I'm still nursing - I want to.. Wanna keep the boobs longer too *lol* It's a bitch though because I have to have a certain amount of calories to keep my levels from dropping. I know I already complained about this - but no crash dieting for me.. Ugh... No fat burners.. And I looked at the scale today - I was doing so well - and I've gone up like 7 lbs.. Think it's because I'm about to get my period soon - and that's another thing! That just came back - thought nursing would stave that off a bit longer - but nooooooo....! Now I got body issues AND the breakouts and PMS to go along with the monthly curse - so I was already feeling shitty about my body - now I'm twice as frustrated.. I had to go back to the doctors today for a lower back strain - it's keeping me from building my core back right now. I swear if my pole could laugh at me - it would have all kind of jokes right now. I won't walk around like this though either - breaks the law if attraction - if I'm not feeling confident and fit - I'll just wait to go back to work cuz I won't make money feeling like this. I was watching something today though - tips for belly fat and weight loss - some of it's common sense like cut sugar - some of it was a good reminder - drink lots of water - a lot of the time weight gain is largely due to dehydration - and seriously watch your intake of table salt - that's a good one. Try not to use regular table salt - spring for the good shit - and of course exercise *derp* Now if I can vigilantly take my own advice maybe I can stop bitching as much.. :-P *lol* xoxo
DorienG
12-20-2015, 02:05 AM
I actually always feel good about my body (except that I'm short, but there ain't much I can do that change that), but I'm thinnish, firm, muscular, so generally feeling ok.
But, I've been under a lot of stress. I'm getting paid to study for a job I'm up for. It has been non stop looking at books and screens....for hours. Also, it's been dry and windy. Sooo....my eyes have become so dry that my eye doctor during my year check up said that one of my eyes had no tears!! He said NOBODY should have eyes that dry:-(
My eyes are big, but somewhat deep set. I feel like they are so irritated that they have sunken deeper into my head! Up until yesterday (it's raining , finally) within a few hours my make up would end up in the corners of my eyes and they would feel swollen and irritated. Not A Good Look!! And the stress of passing these tests to get the position I want with this company, has made my skin dry. I've NEVER had dry skin! (This is not my body. That skin rocks!) It's my face. I've been using pure coconut oil on it at night. It's That Dry!
So this, has made me feel facially unattractive. I still go out and do social things (when I have time) but during the day, my shades never come off. But for the two shifts I dance per week, I just try to make-up as glamorous as I can and check the eyes more than usual. I love false lashes, but as dry as my eyes are, I don't want to chance the glue irritating me more.
Also, my on-going love/hate relationship with my hair. It's long, (below mid back), curly-wavy and fine. I really don't do too much to it because I want it healthy. And although I've always wanted hair like 90's era Alannis Morrisette (she doesn't even do her hair like that anymore), I know it's a 'dated' look. But I personally love the look. But a lot of guys, mostly the younger ones, aren't into it. So, sometimes I'm hating on my hair, sometimes not. Also, the longer it gets; the flatter it gets on the top of my head. Even though I diffuse it! I've tried different products and I Hate hair spray:-) I do get a blowout about every 5 weeks or so and work it for a few days. It's like night and day! Custys and dudes, hell, random women like my hair when it's blown out! So, yeah, I feel prettier, but then I'm mad that I have to go to that extent for my hair to look pretty.
(Yup, another long post). Maybe if I could get a head transplant, then I would be ok???:-)
Raven88
12-20-2015, 05:08 AM
I felt this way through elementary school, because I had severely crooked teeth and hated my nose and was super skinny. Then I got braces, filled out, started contouring my nose with makeup (before it was a common thing lol) and dyed my hair from reddish brown to light blonde.
I was still skinny but I had an ass, and until my early 20's NO cellulite or a single hint of body fat...but now at 27, my teeth have moved a bit, I'm no longer size 0 and I have cellulite..I'm going through a nose hating phase and want a boob job since my friend got hers last year.But I just don't have the cash right now for all three things to get fixed sighhhhhhhhhhh
charlie61
12-23-2015, 02:56 PM
Just did a glycolic acid peel yesterday. Oh yeah...feeling SUPER sexy today!
(Anyone who's done a peel before knows what I'm talkin' 'bout...the short-term effect is a little horrifying, but the long-term results are worth it!)
Genoveve
12-23-2015, 03:30 PM
^^^I'm sitting in the hair salon right now and I just had a laser session done on my face an hour ago, my face is bright red and super shiny. I did a glycoloc peel once and had to be in public for hours afterward. #sexy