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tuesdaymarie
08-15-2015, 08:20 AM
^Jay, I've made multiple posts in the past on what happened when my doctor attempted to insert an IUD for me, and it was extremely traumatic. I don't want to go through that again, especially when women who have placement issues often have considerable pain IF their doctor can get an IUD placed. If you're going to throw out judgment on my education and my preferred contraceptive measures, maybe you should at least read the entire thread, where I mentioned at least twice that the IUD failed for me.

Further, a tubal ligation does not require multiple days in the hospital, and I also mentioned Essure (again, in the thread you apparently didn't read but want to hop into to be rude), which doesn't even require general anesthesia. But thanks for taking your time to "educate" me.

Aniela
08-15-2015, 10:41 AM
This is exactly why we need more sex education. If you think an ambulatory procedure (IUD) that takes less than five minutes is more traumatic than major surgery (that requires GENERAL anesthesia, and multiple days in the hospital), then someone didn't educate you right. I did had an IUD once; it was quick, easy, and absolutely painless.

On the surface, I agree w/ this -- I also had problem-free IUD & I agree that there needs to be more education abt sex/bc in general.

But tuesdaymarie has mentioned having had serious problems w/ the IUD. Apart from her exp, it (or any other method) isn't guaranteed to work for everyone. Unless you're her or any other woman's personal gyno, you really have no place talking like this.

kortneykay
08-15-2015, 01:46 PM
Also, I forgot. I'm too damn self-centered so it just wouldn't work out : /

audrey_k
08-15-2015, 06:45 PM
I used to not want kids for the longest time and everyone would tell me "you'll change your mind when you get older" and I would roll my eyes... but probably sometime over the last 5-7 years I've changed my mind. I definitely want kids. But for me there's a big difference between becoming a stay at home mum and having a child. My mum worked full time when I was younger and it didn't do anything horrible to me, if anything it made me more independent, and my independence is one of the things that has helped me survive and accomplish what I have in my life. It also zapped any ideas out of my head that my goal in life was to get married and have children and find someone to take care of me. I have friends who had stay at home mums and they definitely think that way as it's been role-modeled for them... I don't want my child to think that way. When I have kids I'm not going to give up my entire life to stay at home and make sandwiches and play with blocks-- I'm going to continue in my career and do the best I can being a mum, giving my child everything that they need, and they'll probably become the centre of my life, but I'm not going to make them the only thing in my life. I feel like that's when people become miserable, because if you do that for eighteen years, what are you going to do when they grow up and leave home? You're going to be miserable and spend your days wandering without purpose. Me being around 100% of the time but being miserable is worse than me being around 60% of the time and being happy. I know some women who all they want to do is have children and push buggies and play with baby toys and make their entire life about their child, I don't get that, but to each their own.

But I think you either want children or you don't, it's a mental/emotional thing that you can't change. If you don't want them you shouldn't have them, it will make everyone miserable, most of all the child. If you want them you should have them, you probably will always feel like a part of your life is missing without a child. I don't think either way is better or worse.

Dakota Pink
08-20-2015, 12:49 PM
I've always wanted the bumper sticker that says "we had a child but the dog was allergic so we gave away the kid". I've never wanted kids for so many reasons, overpopulation, time consuming, financially dependent, the way society is, other children's influence etc. People used to tell me the same thing, when you get older and married that will change... I'm now married with a house, 3 cars, 3 rabbits and two dogs and I'm 33 and still have no desire to have kids.

TBH kids kind of scare me. I hated being a child and my husband had a really abusive childhood so he doesn't want children either. When I went to get my IUD placed (but I had a full on surgery and they placed the IUD after the procedure so I understand being hesitant about getting one) my husband went to the consultation with me at the OBGYN and we decided 100% no kids after sitting in that waiting room. It was full of horrible acting kids and babies screaming.

My Dr. Is a guy and he's always been very accepting of me not wanting kids, I'm so sorry so many people have had such an issue getting long-term/permanent birth control. (I have major health issues so it's not an option for me). I'll adopt an animal from a shelter, or to prevent from being in a bad situation, that's why I now have three bunnies, but no kids for me in my future.

Aniela
08-20-2015, 02:19 PM
I've always wanted the bumper sticker that says "we had a child but the dog was allergic so we gave away the kid".

...

My Dr. Is a guy and he's always been very accepting of me not wanting kids ...

I would totally get that bumper sticker just to piss off certain ppl in my family :devil:

Would your dr happen to be part of the Cigna network? Idk where you're located but if it's not more than one state over, I'd think seriously abt planning a trip to see him abt getting 'fixed'

SuperJa
08-20-2015, 03:04 PM
I just recently found out that the abortion clinic here does surgeries, costing between free and $1500 depending on which one you pick. Seriously considering this. They make you do a couple consults, but the girl I found out from works with me and she says they legitimately accept the idea that some women don't want kids, which is a refreshing change. It'd be amazing to not have to stress out about pregnancy ever.


Honestly people who HAVE to have a biological baby sound a lot to me like people who won't adopt a shelter dog because they HAVE to have a puppy. If I ever decide, hey I do want a child around, I'd adopt one. There's so many kids out there without families, it seems wrong to me.

sexsells
08-22-2015, 02:57 AM
I'm not sure if id like to birth children, but I'd possibly consider adopting. I worry though that I would be too pedantic and controlling and authoritarian and not compassionate enough. Having and looking after children is a very self-less thing to do (as in you can't be selfish as you have little ones to think of). I don't know if i could handle that.

caramelcraze
08-22-2015, 04:32 AM
I'm not a huge fan of babies and I'm REALLY not a fan of pregnancy. I grew up with a ton of siblings and a stay at home mom who really didn't understand how to tactfully deal with a flock of children. Regardless, she really tried to drive home the fact that all women should have children, every woman she knew who didn't was miserable, and that easy pregnancies were the norm.

I naively believed her until my depo shot failed & then proceeded to have the twin pregnancy from hell. 2 trimesters of non-stop vomiting, fainting, early onset gestational diabetes, heartburn, migraines, swelling (my feet went up 2 shoe sizes), anemia, daily nose bleeds, roids & hair loss. As harsh as it may sound to some, by the time I miscarried I was relieved that I didn't have to go through any of it anymore. I can't imagine going through that shit storm EVER again.

All that being said, I wouldn't mind adopting like a 4+ year old who slept through the night, could use the bathroom unattended, and communicate with me in something other than wailing tears... those are just things I really have no desire to deal with ever if I can avoid it. Plus there are already so many kids out there who need parents, so if I ever feel the burning urge to be a bonafide mom instead of a dog mom, I'll probably just go that route. For now, dog mom suits me perfectly (as does sleeping through the night :p ).

Dakota Pink
08-25-2015, 05:18 AM
I would totally get that bumper sticker just to piss off certain ppl in my family :devil: haha, same here!

Would your dr happen to be part of the Cigna network? Idk where you're located but if it's not more than one state over, I'd think seriously abt planning a trip to see him abt getting 'fixed'

I'd love to be permanently fixed but with my Heath issues my body can't take it. From the best I can tell my body would send me into a permanent disability from my pain disorder that may never be controlled again, unless on major prescriptions. For now I've still got 4+ years on this IUD and its saving me from having my period daily (had it daily for 8 months straight before the surgery and IUD) and its saving me from two surgeries a year.

As much as kids scare me, there is nothing more precious than a child and I give all my repect to the mothers (and fathers) of this world. It's just not for me but I've seen some amazing sacrifices from parents and its so heartwarming. In a different life with a different body I'd like to at least have the option to chose, but I don't and I'm perfectly Okay with it. I love my husband and I'd do anything for my pets and I hope one day to have a bigger house and bigger yard and have more pets!

To all the dedicated parents out there I give you my full support! It's not my gig but raising children is the hardest responsibility and I do respect you for your hard work.

Raven88
08-26-2015, 07:06 PM
I don't want kids for several reasons. I have an autistic brother, cousin and uncle. It's in my genes and I don't want to raise an autistic child. I had a hard time being a sibling to one growing up, and saw what my parents went through. I don't think anyone can understand until they have spent time around autism what it is really like.
I wouldn't wish it upon anyone..no offense to anyone who might have a child with this disorder.

I already live in one of the most expensive cities in North America. In a ritzy area on top of that. It's just too expensive.
I want to travel, I love fashion and looking good, and it's hard to do this with children

I'm incredibly squeamish. I've been known to run to the bathroom and come close to throwing up from just SEEING it in MOVIES. I've gone home when people have gotten sick at work because I couldn't deal...so how will I have kids? lol

I'm already getting older. I'm almost 30 and finished school later than average due to parental/life bullshit. My career isn't settled and by the time it is, I don't think I will be able to have children as easily.

The world is too chaotic and overpopulated as it is...why add to the problem.

EvelynHeartsYou
08-28-2015, 06:54 PM
I was just confirmed sterile, yesterday afternoon :) I had the Essure procedure done (twice... there were complications the first time), then 90 days later I went for the modified HSG (sterilization confirmation).

I have known since I was 7 that I didn't want children. I simply don't have the urge. I have plenty of other reasons to repulse me from the thought of birthing and raising a child, but the main one is that I don't have the maternal urge for humans and I have never once changed my mind and that's a fine reason. I've been seeking a doctor to sterilize me since I was 18 (I wouldn't have believed me at 18, either) and started to get disheartened around 25 so I stayed on birth control for way longer than I should have. Now at 31, I have finally found a doctor who believes in women's choices (in Texas!!) and I couldn't be happier :)

Serena-Shields
08-29-2015, 12:44 AM
I absolutely do not, in any sense, want a little rat running around my feet and puking on my pretty hair. Babies gross me out and toddlers can never seem to keep their snotty hands off my 3k worth of dolls.

Obviously I cannot have children in the 'traditional' sense, being a trans woman. I get a little agitated and sad when I think about how I can't ever get pregnant, but less in the ''I want to have a baby'' sense and more in a ''I can't fucking do it because I was born with the wrong parts'' sense. I'm good with children, I use to train five year olds to ride horseback all day, but I can get rid of them after an hour AND I get paid for it! With a kid you get your bank drained, you lose a significant amount of time for yourself and you have to raise the little fucker. I am entirely selfish and I want to live out my life playing with pretty dolls and petting pretty equines and spending all my time by myself. I will NEVER date a guy who wants children and marriage and all that shit. Yuck.

I would probably make an excellent mother in the way that I get very protective and nurturing around kids and I will do anything I can to make sure one of my riding students is safe, but it's not because I love them- it's because I'll feel so bad if they get hurt and I'd rather do a bunch of work to avoid that guilt.

SweetJulia
08-31-2015, 04:24 PM
I so don't want kids. I'd have to go off anxiety meds, get huge, fuck up my stomach tattoo, and risk passing on mental illness. And that's before the little fucker is even out.

Optimist
09-04-2015, 06:40 AM
I've never heard of a dr refusing a vasectomy, but I hear LOTS of "you'll change your mind" with women.

We let 15 year olds do gender reassignment steps but we refuse to let a grown ass woman tie her tubes. If that doesn't scream "women don't know how to make decisions" I don't know what does.

CHECKMATE! That's the best argument I've heard. I will be using it.

Optimist
09-04-2015, 07:06 AM
This is exactly why we need more sex education. If you think an ambulatory procedure (IUD) that takes less than five minutes is more traumatic than major surgery (that requires GENERAL anesthesia, and multiple days in the hospital), then someone didn't educate you right. I did had an IUD once; it was quick, easy, and absolutely painless.

That being said, I am not questioning your choice of whether you want to procreate or not. Just pointing out your lack of understanding of birth control methods.

One note is that all procedures have potential complications. Anyone thinking about any form of birth control should do research on it. What's painless for one may not be for others. For instance my mother ended up sterile because she got an IUD that caused a nasty infection. I have had issues with pill contraception that has caused me excessive bleeding, It can be trial and error so don't be shy about doing your own research and getting a second opinion if you have an uncooperative or uninformed doctor on your hands. I'm still getting over the arrogance of a doctor refusing to do a procedure to sterilize and I frankly think it's an unspoken government effort to keep women (specifically white women) cranking out kids at a level over replacement rate. Minority and poor women have a much different history with sterilization in this country so I'm struck by the stark difference.

Anywho, I support your decision to wait and think it over, OP. I have no kids and I will not have any unless at the 11th hour, I married a dude who actually wanted the job of raising a responsible human to adulthood. I mean the kind of guy wo isn't in it for a mini-me or a little buddy, but an actual leader/nurturer.

tuesdaymarie
09-04-2015, 09:36 AM
^More than a few people have made comments to me about how I'm an intelligent white woman, so I should feel obligated to reproduce because minorities are "breeders" and are taking over the country. I just tell them my boyfriend's hispanic so I'm already a race traitor.

LaylaLovely
09-04-2015, 10:12 AM
I never wanted kids...but I had one when my bc failed..well I also didn't take it accordingly..lol but I wouldn't change a thing she changed me for the better...would I have more!??? Nope. I didn't want children before but now at I'm a mom I see that I just shouldn't have more.. My anxiety can't handle having a whole life to stress over.. I'm constantly worried about her and her well being her future etc. Lol. Now I have the mirena and i hold on dearly to that haha!

justanothercamgirl
09-04-2015, 10:47 AM
I had my tubes tied years ago.

(Hurray for Canadian Health Care)

Optimist
09-04-2015, 12:21 PM
^More than a few people have made comments to me about how I'm an intelligent white woman, so I should feel obligated to reproduce because minorities are "breeders" and are taking over the country. I just tell them my boyfriend's hispanic so I'm already a race traitor.

Yeah! I found out the Quiverfull movement the Duggars belong to is all about that. Some people have some wild reasons for wanting to trap women in motherhood at any cost (to the women).

IvaSkye
09-04-2015, 01:48 PM
I do not want any kids. I suffer from depression and I think it would be selfish for me to bring more kids into the world when I can barely take care of myself because of mental illness.

Even if I didn't suffer from depression, I still do not see myself ever wanting to have kids. But then again, I am only 23 and my mind could change when I am in my 30's, but definitely have no desire to have children right now or in the near future.

KaraLynn
09-04-2015, 02:34 PM
I don't want children and never did, luckily my husband doesn't want any either. When I was single I never pursued a long time relationship with men who did want children because I knew it would be a conflict of interest in the future.

princessonyx
09-07-2015, 10:13 PM
I'm glad I found this. I'm 23, I don't want children. If I have children, it will be a long time for now - and I am probably going to adopt --- IF and ONLY IF i decide to. I grew up in a really abusive home, and I'm trying to unfuck my life from that and I'm afraid to perpetuate or pass those same things down to anyone else. My siblings ALL have children and are in committed relationships. I am not sure what that says about me because I am not - lol probably that I am too anxious for it all just yet. My parents fucked me up, I don't want to even risk doing that to another human being.

justlurk
09-14-2015, 07:23 PM
I do not have kids nor wants kids. I'm a total outcast since I do not have pets either. My SO and I both do not want kids now or in the future. My whole family has medical issues and/or is crazy.

amberlly
09-14-2015, 07:45 PM
I can appreciate that permanent birth control for younger women without children could seem drastic to an outsider/professional. But if the person is of sound mind and can clearly understand the procedure and consequences - its surely their right to be given access to the treatment.

Is it possible that permanent birth control would be more accessible if the person was to go overseas to get it done? Somewhere less regulated/ concerned with religion and political correctness etc. Like in Asia?

audritwo
09-14-2015, 10:21 PM
Kids are a fucking 20+ year money pit.

http://www.marketplace.org/topics/your-money/saving-retirement-dont-have-kids

Aurora14
09-15-2015, 12:19 AM
I never wanted kids, I have had 3. I have mental issues. They are the big reason I didn't want kids when I was younger and part of the reason I had them when I was older (I only had kids because my husband wanted like 6, we settled at two). I have a hard time taking care of myself. I really am surprised that I can take care of my husband and kids. I can't help but think of what life would have been like if I could have gotten my tubes tied earlier. I feel bad because I don't feel that motherly attachment. There are times I feel resentful toward my kids. Don't get me wrong, I take care of my kids and possibly spoil them, and I do occasionally have that huge rush of love. But hopefully it will be easier when they are older. I've noticed I can deal better the older/ more self sufficient a kid is.

I think that anyone that doesn't want to have children and wants to choose a permanent option should be able to do so. Make the patient go to a couple of consult sessions, maybe a psych eval, and let them get their procedure. Most women know if they want them or not. The women that don't want them usually have the most well thought out and valid reasons. A lot of people say we are being selfish because we don't want to procreate. Personally, I think it is more selfish to want to have children 'just because'.

Optimist
09-15-2015, 08:39 AM
Kids are a fucking 20+ year money pit.

http://www.marketplace.org/topics/your-money/saving-retirement-dont-have-kids

I'm making a thread of your post in Dollar Den. It's something that needs to be seriously considered by every woman.

Optimist
09-15-2015, 08:39 AM
Kids are a fucking 20+ year money pit.

http://www.marketplace.org/topics/your-money/saving-retirement-dont-have-kids

I'm making a thread of your post in Dollar Den. It's something that needs to be seriously considered by every woman.

amberlly
09-15-2015, 03:02 PM
Medical tourism, seems one can get tubes tied etc in central America and Thailand. Cash based society.

Plus it seems it's not such a permanent procedure in if one wants to get pregnant and changes their mind, they can do so via IVF.

That shows a very different picture to the one being offered by the typical gynecologist.

MissMoore
10-07-2015, 10:13 PM
I have absolutely no desire to have children. I will be in my mid twenties in a few years and I've felt this way since I've been 15.

Tourdefranzia
10-08-2015, 09:33 AM
I too am an INTJ and knew pretty early on that I didn't want to be a parent. There is no reason whatsoever to have children if you don't desire them.

I got my tubes tied in my mid 20's and I've never had more than a fleeting thought of "what if I had kids?" I'm perfectly happy without them. Sometimes I get curious about what my offspring would look like and curious about what it takes to actually give birth (Is it harder than running a marathon? Is it easier than climbing Mt Everest?), but the idea of having a little person (and later, a not so little person living in your basement) clinging to me for the rest of my life just never appealed to me.

There are 7 billion people on the planet. If you decide to take yourself out of the gene pool, I promise, the human race will not suffer even a little bit.

Selina M
10-08-2015, 11:38 AM
Honestly (and this would horrify a lot of moms) I think i would have them if and only if I was wealthy, and could pay a surrogate to carry them and then have daycare/nannies until they're old enough for school.

I don't want the physical trauma of birth, and I don't want to give up my life for another being. I got shit to do besides staying home and cleaning crayon off the walls.
And I know i would be PISSED if I got a kid that turned out to do nothing with themselves. I would probably be like the Asian "tiger moms".

Vyanka
10-08-2015, 11:49 AM
I got shit to do besides staying home and cleaning crayon off the walls.

Ha! :-D

Speaking of over population. I feel like couples who try to conceive and buy eggs, should really consider adoption. Why put someone through physical torture just to get their egg, when they can just adopt a child who needs a family.

Anyhow. I'm in the middle. Not sure. I can't even find a decent man to date around here, and I'm already 34. Lots of non-commitment issues men out there. If I have any kid(s), I want a loving SOLID partner....someone who will NEVER think of leaving their family and taking care of them. Priority. So many shitty dads/husbands out there. Christ.
My idea is to give that child a happy childhood, unlike I had when I was a kid with the constant fights in the house. I would never want to put a child through that trauma.

indiegirl
10-13-2015, 02:42 PM
I go back and forth between wanting kids. I have weeks where I want to quit this job, get a legit professional career, find a SO, and have 1 or 2 kids in the next few years. I've noticed I am wanting those things right now purely to go along with the pressure society puts on you when you reach your mid-twenties (thanks facebook for the wedding and engagement reminders lol). But going that route right now sounds foolish and unplanned....hell, the amount of work it takes to take care of my large dogs is enough for me right now.

In my 30's, a family sounds nice. Right now my goal before I leave the biz is to have a fully paid off house in my name (hopefully in 4 years) and a little bit of savings in the bank to hold me down while I transition jobs. Then I'll go that route. I would feel more secure starting a family and getting married if I had a car and a house in only my own name. After all, you never know if you'll go through divorce or unexpected tragedy down the road, so I'd rather play it safe.

DreamsInDigital
10-13-2015, 07:39 PM
Wow, this post sounds just like me. I have never wanted kids, and I always got that, "Oh, you'll change your mind when you get older." line from family members as well. Well, yep....approaching 30, and still no desire for kids. Not even a little.

I was actually really grateful to see this post bc my bf and I come from totally opposite families. My family: I grew up as basically an only child, my parents were/are very well off and I feel like they had pretty rigid expectations for what kind of person their daughter should grow up to be. Everything was strict, strict, strict, beyond what most people would think was reasonable.

My boyfriend's family: EVERYONE has children, even if they can't afford him. Multiple different random fathers, and they often start around 16 years old and just keep going until they have like 5 or 6 kids. I try SO hard not to be judgemental, but I just can't understand why someone would have that many children that they know they can't afford. I know I'm biased, but it was always the poor kids who got made fun of in school, cuz they didn't have the right clothes, etc. Why would you want to knowingly put your child through that? Every time we go somewhere with his family members, they bring the kids too.

My bf just doesn't understand why I don't like kids and why I wouldn't want to be around them 24/7, so I can't talk to him about it. But sometimes I really feel like I'm going to end up having no friends later in life because everyone I know is eventually gonna pop out some kids and center their life around them, and then we won't have much in common anymore. :(

baer45
10-13-2015, 08:00 PM
After reading all your posts I still want kids, am I stupid or not?

Elektra Luxx
10-13-2015, 09:08 PM
After reading all your posts I still want kids, am I stupid or not?

You're not stupid at all. I want kids so so bad. When I have kids, I'm going to do my best to rise them without screwing them up too bad.

lynn2009
10-13-2015, 09:40 PM
After reading all your posts I still want kids, am I stupid or not?

No, you're not and I don't know why people can't ever defend their own position without putting down someone else's. People have different priorities! It's not a big deal.

Aurora_Sunset
10-14-2015, 09:43 AM
After reading all your posts I still want kids, am I stupid or not?

Not at all. When people want kids, they've probably been around kids and people with kids and generally understand what they're getting into - but whereas people who don't want kids look at it all and say "Nope, screw that," other people will still think the upsides are worth it because they actually like kids.

Like, people can bitch at me all day about how messy, expensive, noisy, and needy cats are and how they would never want a cat... but I love cats, and I think those things are worth it for a cat, so I'm gonna have cats. But a lot of those people would deal with more messes and noises, higher expenses, and more restrictions for a kid cuz they like kids. But I'm like "uh, no, kids are messy and expensive." lol it's just what's worth it to you.

annietrix
11-15-2015, 03:04 AM
I am in 40's and don't have kids.

kinkydirtybitch
11-15-2015, 06:16 AM
I bought hubby a vasectomy for his birthday after reading on the debilitating side effects & shabby comparative success rate of female sterilisation.

I also had the usual bullshit "oh you'll change your mind when you get older/meet a nice penis/[insert other pointless bullshit here]. Well guess what? I'm 44 & have no intention of churning out a wonky one so all the breeders can now fuck off. I just tell them we're sterilised already "just to make absolutely sure".

Children: *shudders*

tuesdaymarie
11-15-2015, 06:04 PM
^What debilitating side effects? I'm going in for another tubal ligation consultation next week. I really don't want to deal with surgery, but the side effects of hormonal contraception don't seem to be going well for me.

mm621
11-16-2015, 04:20 PM
I'm soooo on the fence. Ever since I was a teenager I knew I wouldn't be having ANY kids... I actually thought about getting my tubes tied myself! Then there will never be an "uh oh" moment, or freak outs if birth control failed. I'm not really good with kids, and I feel very uncomfortable with them. Then occasionally, I see happy families by the pool or wherever and get soft, and think to myself, "hey.... I want that, too!" Haha on the other side of the token, running errands and constantly bumping into rowdy, screaming children reminds me of what I DON'T want to deal with... And then I think that karma will kick my ass once the kids are teenagers... Oh yeah. Lol

And pregnancy scares the shit out of me. I know what I'm about to say is weird and does not make sense, because it's actually a very natural thing, but it just seems unnatural to me... With the way your body changes, everything that goes on internally, the potential for complications.... No thank you.

I just tell people, "ask me when I'm 30." Maybe my career will kick off by then, and I can stop being in career change limbo and actually have some stability in that aspect. Lol

charlie61
11-16-2015, 04:33 PM
Before I met my partner, I thought I'd NEVER want kids.

MissJu
11-16-2015, 09:01 PM
When i think about having my own kids:
+ love i will feel toward my kid
Thats probably it.
But i will love a cat too so...
-body will change,skin will get even more stretch marks,my big real boobs may become like spaniel's ears.
-if i will have a child i will have it right! Thats mean i will not use any anesthesia while giving birth and i will do it at home.
-i have no money to grow a child.
-i will be very responsible and i will worry always.kid will age me too much.

kaninchen
11-17-2015, 12:08 PM
And pregnancy scares the shit out of me. I know what I'm about to say is weird and does not make sense, because it's actually a very natural thing, but it just seems unnatural to me... With the way your body changes, everything that goes on internally, the potential for complications.... No thank you.

No, this makes perfect sense to me! My biggest reason for not wanting kids is the way pregnancy changes your body. Maybe I'm vain, maybe being a stripper has spoiled me... But I'm very protective of my body and I don't want anything to damage it. I know aging is one thing, and I'm okay with getting older, but like, volunteering to put myself at risk for diastasis recti, an episiotomy, stretch marks, et cetera, isn't my cup of tea.

This is why I feel like adopting would be ideal for me if I ever get baby rabies. I just can't get over how violent and invasive and scary it seems to actually have a tiny person living inside you. :eek:

kinkydirtybitch
11-17-2015, 12:14 PM
^What debilitating side effects? I'm going in for another tubal ligation consultation next week. I really don't want to deal with surgery, but the side effects of hormonal contraception don't seem to be going well for me.

Seriously life changing shit that I stumbled across when I was googling how to prepare for the sterilisation I had been failing to research until that point, under the wrongful assumption that it's a very straightforward operation without the possible side effects that way too many are suffering as a result.

Like so many things there are people out there with successful sterilisations and that is awesome - I am too fit, healthy & risk averse to jeopardise my current good run of 'luck', personally!

kinkydirtybitch
11-17-2015, 12:15 PM
I just can't get over how violent and invasive and scary it seems to actually have a tiny person living inside you. :eek:

Snap! It felt like a parasite making me sick as fuck.

AlyssaJane
11-21-2015, 04:42 AM
I can't have children. I had mixed emotions about it for a long time. Now I can't see myself being a mother. The time commitment, the loss of freedom, the responsibility. I'm open to step-parenting if I met the right guy and he had children, although I'm not sure I have patience for a relationship either.