View Full Version : The Random Thoughts Thread...
wednesday86
12-17-2015, 12:30 AM
I went back to the club tonight and wanted to leave as soon as I got there..UGH. I don't know if I have social anxiety or what; I just do NOT want to talk to any customers-- period. I pretty much sat in the back counting down the hours until I could leave. Only did 1 dance and was annoyed with the customer the whole time. A big crowd came in and I begged to go home so I wouldn't have to go on stage. The thought of going onto a crowded stage made me want to puke/cry. It's always given me anxiety but I could get over it before...not anymore.
I just don't know if there's any coming back from this burn out. Maybe I'm burned out for good.
I'm going to try camming tomorrow night after my day shift (if I have any energy) and hope I can completely phase into that and eBay asap.
Glamourmilf
12-17-2015, 10:49 AM
:-*
I went back to the club tonight and wanted to leave as soon as I got there..UGH. I don't know if I have social anxiety or what; I just do NOT want to talk to any customers-- period. I pretty much sat in the back counting down the hours until I could leave. Only did 1 dance and was annoyed with the customer the whole time. A big crowd came in and I begged to go home so I wouldn't have to go on stage. The thought of going onto a crowded stage made me want to puke/cry. It's always given me anxiety but I could get over it before...not anymore.
I just don't know if there's any coming back from this burn out. Maybe I'm burned out for good.
I'm going to try camming tomorrow night after my day shift (if I have any energy) and hope I can completely phase into that and eBay asap.
That's what happened to me. I was on a strip trip, and bam! The anxiety hit me so hard, I could barely finish the trip.
I never went on tour again, because it started happening in stores, restaurants, crowds. Shit!
I was working corporate sales also, so I had that to fall back on, thank god!
Even when I worked for an agency doing ppd, it was rough.
Camming is so great for my anxieties,because I never have physical interaction, and Im safe at home. I rarely go out.
I love it this way.
Let me know if u need a support system when u cam..Skype, etc.
Big hugs. U will get through it, i promise.:-*
wednesday86
12-17-2015, 11:09 AM
Thanks Glamour I appreciate that so much. Do you have social anxiety? I'm wondering if I have it and that's what's going on. I'm just going to work day shifts for now since I just can't deal with any kind of crowd whatsoever.
Glamourmilf
12-17-2015, 11:58 AM
Thanks Glamour I appreciate that so much. Do you have social anxiety? I'm wondering if I have it and that's what's going on. I'm just going to work day shifts for now since I just can't deal with any kind of crowd whatsoever.
I have big time social anxiety.
I always think that I'm gonna get 'jumped' if there are too many people around.
I know it's not 'rational', because it's never happened, but nonetheless I still have it.
I'm pretty sure it probably goes back to a past life, or something.
All the random attacks that have been happening aren't helping either.
Genoveve
12-17-2015, 03:19 PM
My cat goes outside and comes back in all day long, I just leave the side door partially open for him. Every time he walks back in the house I always make a big deal out of it, like squealing and petting him, fawning all over him, and he's gotten to where he expects it. Sometimes I don't see him come in until I spot him out of the corner of my eye and he's just standing next to me completely frozen and looking confused, like waiting for my outpouring of affection and wondering why it isn't happening. He's so cute. Yes I'm a crazy cat lady.
Glamourmilf
12-17-2015, 08:17 PM
So, when did the 'E channel' become Kardashian central? I was staying at a hotel that only has basic cable, and "Keeping Up With the Kardashians' was on the entire time!
I clicked on E when I got home, and there they are... All day, everyday! And they're all sooo passive, and eat in almost every scene.lol!
They are even top of the news when E news daily comes on.
Does anyone know if they own that station now?
Just a random thought, only because their 'asses' have been in my face the past couple of weeks, so it got me thinking./:O
xStacey
12-17-2015, 08:34 PM
The guy I had bad sex with two years ago when I didn't have Facebook and whose number I blocked, just sent me a friend request and I don't even have any profile picture, and we don't have friends in common. He must have searched me lol I feel flattered he still thinks about me to search me on Facebook after all this time.
Cashmere Star
12-17-2015, 08:35 PM
they said get a job doing what I love and I'll never work a day in my life
so I became a stripper
kaninchen
12-18-2015, 12:07 AM
So, when did the 'E channel' become Kardashian central? I was staying at a hotel that only has basic cable, and "Keeping Up With the Kardashians' was on the entire time!
I clicked on E when I got home, and there they are... All day, everyday! And they're all sooo passive, and eat in almost every scene.lol!
They are even top of the news when E news daily comes on.
Does anyone know if they own that station now?
Just a random thought, only because their 'asses' have been in my face the past couple of weeks, so it got me thinking./:O
I don't know why I know this, but I think it's because of Ryan Seacrest. He's like a whatever-in-charge at E! and a producer for the Kardashians. So yeah, I guess they kind of do own E! in a way.
Glamourmilf
12-18-2015, 12:28 AM
I don't know why I know this, but I think it's because of Ryan Seacrest. He's like a whatever-in-charge at E! and a producer for the Kardashians. So yeah, I guess they kind of do own E! in a way.
Oh, right. I forgot about that. Makes sense now. Thank you!
Vyanka
12-19-2015, 02:58 AM
This sux, but I dodged a bullet. :duck:
I met a guy in the summer who I found attractive, yet was shy when he approached me. Never heard from him since the day we met. I find out today, he's engaged to his gf of 3 yrs.
Also, I think someone in his clique knows I'm dancer bc his friend who took my bff out on a date asked if I worked nights bartending. Then brought up how he goes to strip clubs once in a while to her, when he feels like seeing boobs. Tacky, I know. She lost interest asap. He also kept referring me as the friend with the big boobs, whose friends were all trying to get laid....like why would you talk like that to someone on a date?? Rude as hell.
I wish I was attracted to their other buddy from the clique. Who genuinely likes me. That one saw me at a bar the 2nd time I met him, and shoved the girl he had just met to the side to say hello to me. Telling me how much he loves me(he was drunk), & how he wanted to take me out on a date. Lol.
Sux, I'm not as anonymous anymore. After dancing for a few years, it's bound to happen!
Glamourmilf
12-19-2015, 10:56 AM
I was returning to my car in a parking lot yesterday, when this woman runs over to me.
I had just been asked for money by some bum right outside of the store I was in, so I'm thinking, "blah, not again."
She's aking, frantically, where the Ulta beauty supply store is around here.
I forgot I'm holding an Ulta bag, which I use to carry something else in.
I tell her there isn't one, and where the closest one is. I see the look on her face go from hope,to disappointment in like a millisecond.:'(
Bitch, I know how You feeling right now. That's the look I had on my face when I realized there was no Ulta out here. #letdown.
Cashmere Star
12-19-2015, 02:56 PM
ugh I am getting addicted to retail therapy... at the dollar store. Their nail polishes and sheet masks are THE BEST! I totally need to work out but my gym pants are already sweaty from working out 2 days in a row and I should go buy another gym pants at forever 12 but at the same time I dont want to spend money but I kind of want to and ufhdfkjsgkhfkssfrr
SimoneGray
12-20-2015, 01:58 AM
^^ Same problem. And the fact that stores are slashing prices for the festive season aint helping. I have more money this year to spend than I have had in a long time and I know January will be problematic as well when prices hit rock bottom. Happily a lot of the things I'm buying are things I actually need, but it still feels like I have a shopping problem lol.
Glamourmilf
12-20-2015, 02:33 AM
ugh I am getting addicted to retail therapy... at the dollar store. Their nail polishes and sheet masks are THE BEST! I totally need to work out but my gym pants are already sweaty from working out 2 days in a row and I should go buy another gym pants at forever 12 but at the same time I dont want to spend money but I kind of want to and ufhdfkjsgkhfkssfrr
I hear ya. Guess where im going tomorrow while the boys are watching football? The dollar store. Yesss!
SimoneGray
12-20-2015, 07:23 AM
Once again I am indecisive about another college degree. I mean I would LIKE to be a lawyer but I am not sure I could cam and do law at the same time, nor am I convinced that I will be driven enough to work for someone else once it is done...on the other hand I could also get my nail technician's license and open a salon which I would also LOVE to do. But, going into business for yourself is risky as hell, so I don't know and I need to decide because something has to happen in 2016, I can't have another year where I don't work on the future.
Cashmere Star
12-20-2015, 09:11 AM
I hear ya. Guess where im going tomorrow while the boys are watching football? The dollar store. Yesss!
Lol here's a (small) portion of my stash. Ain't even the whole picture.
43678
Lipsticks (which are deeply pigmented and work well, surprisingly), makeup, nail polish, detangler, brand name eyelash glue, sheet masks, haircare, hair masks... all for $1 or less each. I am such a cheapass stripper HAHA but I dance to make money not spend money... I wish I could find good fake nails and fake eyelashes at the dollar store but they don't look too good on me.
Dollar stores are also a great place to find brand name stuff to take to the children's and women's shelter. Not always, but there are deals once in a while.
Once again I am indecisive about another college degree. I mean I would LIKE to be a lawyer but I am not sure I could cam and do law at the same time, nor am I convinced that I will be driven enough to work for someone else once it is done...on the other hand I could also get my nail technician's license and open a salon which I would also LOVE to do.
It's just me but I would hate to be an actual lawyer. The schooling takes a long time, the work itself is stressful, you work for someone else, and ugh just not for me. I respect people who can manage it though. Is paralegal the same as lawyer? I heard there's something like being a lawyer but with less schooling, can't remember on top of my head.
Aurora_Sunset
12-20-2015, 10:34 AM
so I don't know and I need to decide because something has to happen in 2016, I can't have another year where I don't work on the future.
Sums up my life right now. :/
xStacey
12-20-2015, 12:20 PM
A guy messaged me on AFF "I am looking for asian take-out. Are you still on the menu?"... Was that supposed to be a pick-up line because it was terrible.
Glamourmilf
12-20-2015, 01:44 PM
Lol here's a (small) portion of my stash. Ain't even the whole picture.
43678
Lipsticks (which are deeply pigmented and work well, surprisingly), makeup, nail polish, detangler, brand name eyelash glue, sheet masks, haircare, hair masks... all for $1 or less each. I am such a cheapass stripper HAHA but I dance to make money not spend money... I wish I could find good fake nails and fake eyelashes at the dollar store but they don't look too good on me.
Dollar stores are also a great place to find brand name stuff to take to the children's and women's shelter. Not always, but there are deals once in a while.
It's just me but I would hate to be an actual lawyer. The schooling takes a long time, the work itself is stressful, you work for someone else, and ugh just not for me. I respect people who can manage it though. Is paralegal the same as lawyer? I heard there's something like being a lawyer but with less schooling, can't remember on top of my head.
I love it!!! Just looking at that stash made me have a #HaulOrgasm! Can't wait to go there today.
Cashmere Star
12-20-2015, 05:44 PM
Whenever I get nervous about standing out or being "different": "I am a stripper and people pay to see me naked, I can do whatever the fuck I want!!" :D
Vyanka
12-20-2015, 08:49 PM
Wow. Miss Universe's ending. How embarrassing. That said, Philippines deserved it. She answered her questions well. Although beautiful, but I didn't like Colombia's little arrogant response. Loved France tho.
xStacey
12-20-2015, 08:52 PM
Last final tomorrow afternoon worth 80%, can't wait to be done ughh!!
whirlerz
12-20-2015, 09:07 PM
Wow. Miss Universe's ending. How embarrassing. That said, Philippines deserved it. She answered her questions well. Although beautiful, but I didn't like Colombia's little arrogant response. Loved France tho.
You know, dammit, I always manage to miss watching this^! :( They don't advertise it much? I enjoy seeing the ladies, the gowns, & especially the country costume segment which's way too short!
Maybe youtube has rerun of it?
lynn2009
12-20-2015, 09:41 PM
Last final tomorrow afternoon worth 80%, can't wait to be done ughh!!
Good luck!
Vyanka
12-20-2015, 09:54 PM
You know, dammit, I always manage to miss watching this^! :( They don't advertise it much? I enjoy seeing the ladies, the gowns, & especially the country costume segment which's way too short!
Maybe youtube has rerun of it?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=dAe-7NZhmq8
Genoveve
12-20-2015, 11:03 PM
^^They probably did it for publicity's sake, like Whirlerz illustrated no one ever even knows when the pageant is coming on and now everyone will actually be talking about it for once. I wouldn't be surprised though if Miss Columbia ends up eclipsing the actual Miss Universe, like isn't she who all of the media outlets would really rather talk to out of the two of them? Her story is way more interesting. There's been a million Miss Universes but there's never been a '2 minute accidental Miss Universe' before.
Vyanka
12-21-2015, 12:58 AM
I sware. My 11 yr old niece acts like a 21 yr old. :-/ For Christmas she asked for makeup, i-tunes and starbucks gift card. Anything by Nirvana, The Ramones, The Beatles, and ACDC(posters, shirts, etc).
Like, what child? No toys? I'm afraid. Kids now a days.
whirlerz
12-21-2015, 09:09 AM
^^They probably did it for publicity's sake, like Whirlerz illustrated no one ever even knows when the pageant is coming on and now everyone will actually be talking about it for once. I wouldn't be surprised though if Miss Columbia ends up eclipsing the actual Miss Universe, like isn't she who all of the media outlets would really rather talk to out of the two of them? Her story is way more interesting. There's been a million Miss Universes but there's never been a '2 minute accidental Miss Universe' before.
Seems like that pagent has had controversy going bk for a while, maybe not every yr but a lot..
I remember, yrs ago, a model from the US entered & won, her agency pushed her into it she said..she ended up agreeing to step down, I guess they kinda considered her a 'wild child' (would seem tame by today's standards).
She was dating a race car driver, he ended up getting killed in a race, I don't remember all the story, there wasn't social media like today but the story appeared in People mag.
kaninchen
12-21-2015, 10:55 AM
Yesterday at lunch with my boyfriend and his friends (a few married couples, white collar types in their 30s) I told them that I'm a stripper, and... they didn't believe me. At this point, I'm just really bored of saying, "Yep, I graduated from college this year, sure would like to get a real job, but gee, I just don't know what I wanna do yet! Hm! ::)" One of them was asking where I'm working in the meantime, and I bluntly told him the name of my locally prominent club.
He laughed and said, "Sure, and what do you do there?" I told him that I convince people to give me lots of money. He kept laughing and said, "No, don't you work in a restaurant or something? I don't believe you!" I was like:
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/icarly/images/e/eb/Dfdlye.gif/revision/latest?cb=20110627235706
I mean, what was I supposed to do to convince them, show them my dressing room selfies or my cash?! So I just went with the whole restaurant thing. The best part of me supposedly working at Whatever Grill is that I couldn't even tell them where it was. I was like, "Ummm... I think it's on, uh, Y Street and X Street in downtown. Yeah."
Just goes to show that people really do believe what they want to believe.
Cashmere Star
12-21-2015, 12:15 PM
I sware. My 11 yr old niece acts like a 21 yr old. :-/ For Christmas she asked for makeup, i-tunes and starbucks gift card. Anything by Nirvana, The Ramones, The Beatles, and ACDC(posters, shirts, etc).
Like, what child? No toys? I'm afraid. Kids now a days.
I just tell myself "omg they grow up so fast <3"
Glamourmilf
12-21-2015, 04:25 PM
I love Christmas. It's my favorite holiday. But I'm sick of it already! And The day isn't even here yet.
Between one of my camsites contest, which was in November, and another one this week during Christmas, it's all too much.:smiley_sa
Christmas decorations and music starts in October where I live. I think I've reached my saturation point.
Anyone else feel like this?:-\
ScarletKitten
12-21-2015, 07:04 PM
I want a white Christmas damnit. I heard that the winter will be mild this year, and that most likely there won't be snow this holiday season. :( I didn't come all the hell up North just to be let down that I won't see snow on Christmas! Goddamnit, global warming, I blame this on you!
Glamourmilf
12-21-2015, 08:54 PM
43698
I want a white Christmas damnit. I heard that the winter will be mild this year, and that most likely there won't be snow this holiday season. :( I didn't come all the hell up North just to be let down that I won't see snow on Christmas! Goddamnit, global warming, I blame this on you!
Ikr? Damn global Warming! *Shakes Fist* You ruin Everything!!!
Vyanka
12-21-2015, 10:08 PM
I'm just mad I'm not going to be able to wear this brand new, heavy duty coat, made for blizzard, this year. I spent a little over $800.00. Bought 2. One for someone else too.
Genoveve
12-23-2015, 11:13 AM
Omg. My one best friend fell in the shower and her knee cap split in 2, they screwed it back in place and now she has to do 6-8 weeks of physical therapy just to get to where she can use a walker/crutches, she's still in the hospital. So I'm asking my brother about it because he broke his tibia and fibula over the summer and needed pins and tons of surgery. He's filling me in and then he's like "I'm leaving the ER right now." And I'm like 'Wait, whut.' He was there for a kidney stone. What kind of Christmas is this. I told them that they must have been on Santa's bad list and that his kidney stone was probably actually tiny coal.
Elektra Luxx
12-23-2015, 12:25 PM
I'm just mad I'm not going to be able to wear this brand new, heavy duty coat, made for blizzard, this year. I spent a little over $800.00. Bought 2. One for someone else too.
It must be a mild winter all over, I'm in South Texas and it's 80 degrees and sunny. I was talking to one of my neighbors and they are BBQing outdoors for Christmas. I'm in shorts, a tee and flip flops
Cashmere Star
12-23-2015, 12:48 PM
I'm just mad I'm not going to be able to wear this brand new, heavy duty coat, made for blizzard, this year. I spent a little over $800.00. Bought 2. One for someone else too.
Just wait, maybe it will be colder during Jan-March. I noticed that the seasons have a bit shifted a bit, like it's often springtime during summer, summer during fall, fall during winter, and winter during when it should be spring. Maybe it's just me.
baer45
12-23-2015, 01:28 PM
43710
Cold enough for you?
culitos
12-23-2015, 03:45 PM
For once in my life I just want to be done with the holidays.
Glamourmilf
12-23-2015, 04:23 PM
For once in my life I just want to be done with the holidays.
Ikr? I was in a Walgreens yesterday, and they had just put up a Valentine's Day display.:yikes:
ScarletKitten
12-23-2015, 11:12 PM
^^Valentine's before Christmas is even here?!?! What the HELL is wrong with people?! How about we just all celebrate our birthdays two months early?? Humans. smh.
Glamourmilf
12-24-2015, 02:20 AM
^^Valentine's before Christmas is even here?!?! What the HELL is wrong with people?! How about we just all celebrate our birthdays two months early?? Humans. smh.
I had to do a doubletake when I saw that Valentine's dispay. And all of the Christmas stuff was shoved off down an aisle marked 50% and more off!
I admit that I'm just as much of a gluttonous consumer as the next person, but now they've gone too far.
culitos
12-24-2015, 03:02 AM
^ On a positive note you can go ahead and kill two birds with one stone! Because what a better time to shop for Valentine's Day than while last minute xmas shopping.
Vyanka
12-24-2015, 09:44 AM
So, I had to break my long ass dry spell and hung out with my young model boy toy.
He is so proper in bed. It's cute. "Can I fuck you?" After an oral orgasm. He's scared to physically hurt me bc I'm very petite. I look delicate to him.
"I won't cum until you give me permission". MY permission? :) Yeah, I like that. Like I'm the boss. More guys should be that thoughtful in bed.
The constant compliments, good for my ego. Lol. I feel like a queen.
Genoveve
12-24-2015, 10:11 AM
OMG Valentine's is one of my top favorite holidays, I hope they bring it out early here!!
ScarletKitten
12-24-2015, 12:09 PM
So, I had to break my long ass dry spell and hung out with my young model boy toy.
He is so proper in bed. It's cute. "Can I fuck you?" After an oral orgasm. He's scared to physically hurt me bc I'm very petite. I look delicate to him.
"I won't cum until you give me permission". MY permission? :) Yeah, I like that. Like I'm the boss. More guys should be that thoughtful in bed.
The constant compliments, good for my ego. Lol. I feel like a queen.
Giiiirl, he sounds like a dream cum true! lol. You are a QUEEN! :)
Glamourmilf
12-24-2015, 12:14 PM
^ On a positive note you can go ahead and kill two birds with one stone! Because what a better time to shop for Valentine's Day than while last minute xmas shopping.
Nah, I won't buy anything for V day now, because all the merchandise is at full price. I'm gonna wait until next month when it all gets discounted.
baer45
12-24-2015, 02:35 PM
http://i.imgur.com/3CtykYch.jpg
Aurora_Sunset
12-25-2015, 08:51 AM
^^Valentine's before Christmas is even here?!?! What the HELL is wrong with people?! How about we just all celebrate our birthdays two months early?? Humans. smh.
Totally off-topic but my ex used to tell people he was a year older than he really was 2+ months after his birthday. Like, he would just turn 27 in June and by Labor Day, if anyone asked him how old he was, he would say 28. No! You can start saying 28 a month or two before your next birthday, not goddam 6-8 months beforehand.
I don't know why it bothered me so much, but it drove me CRAZY.