View Full Version : The Random Thoughts Thread...
carmen_b
09-13-2020, 08:13 PM
^ I talked it out a bit with him.
He explained that he had become re-anxious about me staying the evening . He verbalized that my confusion was valid ( two weeks ago he did tell me to always just stay when I didn't have the house sit ). We thought of some possible solutions such as just having me leave from 7-9 while they do the bath and bed time routine .
He also felt like staying too frequently might send an " instant step mom " type of message and he wasn't sure how to proceed with things. So talking it out was a good thing. We are going to revisit the whole living situation thing and talk more about it soon. I was able to explain to him more WHY I was initially doing this ( in order to save just 3-4 months on housing and pay down credit cards faster ) . We have known each other about 5.5 - 6 months.
He has booked a nice hotel for me the next two nights which I think is a nice gesture.
whirlerz
09-13-2020, 08:48 PM
Where's my air horn when I need it?
AChildOfBoredom
09-14-2020, 03:43 PM
TIL: the photographer feels that, on top of having The Grizz as my chaperone, keeping pepper spray, two knives, and a handgun with two extra magazines under my dress was “maybe a little excessive”.
WendiStarr
09-14-2020, 06:41 PM
^ Better to be safe than the alternative. Too many sleezy/bad male photographers out there with sinister agendas.
I'm wondering what the heck is wrong with my tween. I asked her what she wanted to dress up as for Halloween and she said a toilet. When I said no, she asked if I could buy a butt face mask. Wth? I was hoping she'd want to be Hermione Granger from Harry Potter, a 1950's sock hop girl, a witch, or something "normal".
AChildOfBoredom
09-14-2020, 06:53 PM
Where's my air horn when I need it?
If you’re gonna go, go all out.
53441
plus
53443
will really get someone’s attention. Ask me how I know.
https://youtu.be/icnRMW6P9nc
^ Better to be safe than the alternative. Too many sleezy/bad male photographers out there with sinister agendas.
True enough.
I'm wondering what the heck is wrong with my tween. I asked her what she wanted to dress up as for Halloween and she said a toilet. When I said no, she asked if I could buy a butt face mask. Wth? I was hoping she'd want to be Hermione Granger from Harry Potter, a 1950's sock hop girl, a witch, or something "normal".[/QUOTE]
I don’t know. On the one hand, I like how unconventional it is.
on the other… it’s still a toilet.
whirlerz
09-14-2020, 08:19 PM
Lol. Years ago, I lived with a mechanic, he put a truck horn in my car, that he got from work.
I'd get to work in the morning, see someone, & honk my horn to say hi, scaring the crap outta them cause it was so loud, + they were half asleep too
AChildOfBoredom
09-15-2020, 02:36 AM
Lol. Years ago, I lived with a mechanic, he put a truck horn in my car, that he got from work.
I'd get to work in the morning, see someone, & honk my horn to say hi, scaring the crap outta them cause it was so loud, + they were half asleep too
An air horn, or just a high tone electric horn?
SnuffleUffleGrass
09-15-2020, 05:50 AM
.I have to share this because I rarely get to experience this level of regret these days.....
Months ago I sold a very nice antique rocking chair to pay my phone bill. Yesterday I found out how valuable it really was, I sold it for a literal fraction of its worth.
The whole problem with collectibles is they aren't worth much until someone in love with the item(s) forks over cash. I could not afford to keep the item.
Anyways, Tell City wood furniture is valuable, you heard it here. I'll be keeping the rest of it that I find.
moneybags
09-15-2020, 08:19 AM
.I have to share this because I rarely get to experience this level of regret these days.....
Months ago I sold a very nice antique rocking chair to pay my phone bill. Yesterday I found out how valuable it really was, I sold it for a literal fraction of its worth.
The whole problem with collectibles is they aren't worth much until someone in love with the item(s) forks over cash. I could not afford to keep the item.
Anyways, Tell City wood furniture is valuable, you heard it here. I'll be keeping the rest of it that I find.
omg. Im so sorry. I totally understand.
WendiStarr
09-15-2020, 12:22 PM
Remind me to never make homemade enchiladas ever again..way too much work! I will just buy them from a restaurant next time.
kimbe
09-15-2020, 12:23 PM
^ Take out is underrated! ;)
AChildOfBoredom
09-15-2020, 12:42 PM
My friend from he community just got both ears pierced and a nose ring. Talk about unexpected. Keep in mind, she actually did baptize into the church (whereas I have not).
carmen_b
09-15-2020, 02:11 PM
^ I’ve calmed a bit from above but not 100%. I’m hitting the road now for Montana and I’ve still got that part of me that’s like “ I don’t want someone who didn’t help me out this week joining “. I’m driving and he is flying up in two days.
Maybe it’s ME who is out of line haha.
Very well could be . He got my hotel covered again last night but I still ended up mad. I checked out at noon and found a garden spot for lunch ( success there ) . But now Ive wasted 1:15-3:30 just being marooned in the car for AC . I have a one hour work commitment before I leave.
I couldn’t even do a coffee shop patio with my dog it’s so hot !
I hope I calm the fuck down. :/
Either I will or I won’t.
I’ll be true to where my intuition leads.
lynn2009
09-15-2020, 03:59 PM
I will never understand why so many people on SW choose to stay angry all the time and fight with people they clearly hate instead of using the ignore list feature.
carmen_b
09-16-2020, 10:47 PM
Of course a phone call then leads me to feeling sorry for HIM ! ;/
Shit ..... life is complex sometimes isn't it ?
He explained that he always kind of had that boundary of not wanting any over nights when his daughter was there but he experimented with it and overall isn't feeling comfy with it . Like .... he had pushed through that uncomfy feeling to try to keep me happy ( we are talking 3-4 nights not a frequent thing ).
So my rage has subsided a bit but now I feel uncomfortable in others ways. Like ..... he is referencing something about " not ready for me in step mom role " and some other things to wrap my head around. I know I never had the *title* but I was trying to BE a good ( start ) to a step mom.
I feel so 50/50 on just leaving the situation which I hate to admit but it is just how I feel.
He says he feels like me staying there ( more often than the 50% of the time when he is kid free ) seems like it's prematurely moving in together. I'm a little embarrassed because I was crying so much in this last hour of being on the phone but the rage seems to at least be *subsiding* somewhat.
What do you guys think ? We are coming up to knowing each other 6 months very soon.
It's so damn much to think about it's making my head explode. Now there is an absolute CAP on just 15 days of intimacy every month in perfect conditions ( like we are both in town and not sick ) ? I say it that way because with home schooling she is never out of the house and he doesn't really do the " night cap " thing after he bed time other than the very very very rare occasion.
moneybags
09-17-2020, 12:04 AM
Of course a phone call then leads me to feeling sorry for HIM ! ;/
Shit ..... life is complex sometimes isn't it ?
He explained that he always kind of had that boundary of not wanting any over nights when his daughter was there but he experimented with it and overall isn't feeling comfy with it . Like .... he had pushed through that uncomfy feeling to try to keep me happy ( we are talking 3-4 nights not a frequent thing ).
So my rage has subsided a bit but now I feel uncomfortable in others ways. Like ..... he is referencing something about " not ready for me in step mom role " and some other things to wrap my head around. I know I never had the *title* but I was trying to BE a good ( start ) to a step mom.
I feel so 50/50 on just leaving the situation which I hate to admit but it is just how I feel.
He says he feels like me staying there ( more often than the 50% of the time when he is kid free ) seems like it's prematurely moving in together. I'm a little embarrassed because I was crying so much in this last hour of being on the phone but the rage seems to at least be *subsiding* somewhat.
What do you guys think ? We are coming up to knowing each other 6 months very soon.
It's so damn much to think about it's making my head explode. Now there is an absolute CAP on just 15 days of intimacy every month in perfect conditions ( like we are both in town and not sick ) ? I say it that way because with home schooling she is never out of the house and he doesn't really do the " night cap " thing after he bed time other than the very very very rare occasion.
Forgive me for saying this but I figured you were a more mature woman (30 something). If I was dating in my 30’s or even late 20’s and looking for marriage I would feel some type of way. If you are looking for marriage or commitment and he’s not then I would seriously think about if I wanted to invest time and energy in a relationship with someone who is pushing me away.
I just watched me best friend pour 3 years in a relationship with some guy who is now MIA. She broke up with him because of it.
I don’t think he’s a bad person, but if you want more and he doesn’t I would figure it out before you invest more time.
I hope I’m not projecting, but this is why I don’t want to date. I seriously feel like too many men do waste our time. I’m sure it happens to men too, but from my experience men will date a woman as long as it’s convenient, but get scared when it’s gets too real.
Honestly, my advice would be to pull away from him and see what you want. Don’t tell him why. This isn’t playing mind games. just be busy with your own life. First, it will give you some perspective. Secondly, if you aren’t chasing him he’ll notice and probably start to chase you. I would get busy living your life without him. I don’t mean breaking up or anything. Just be a little bit more unavailable. Focus on making money or take an online class.
WendiStarr
09-17-2020, 06:11 AM
T_T When you did a cam show with a lot of demands and realize you only made $20 for all that. I need to raise my rates.
carmen_b
09-17-2020, 08:47 AM
THANK You so much Money !
That is how I feel right now. His actions are clearly holding me at an arms length. I feel like his points would be much more valid if we had known each other 3 months v.s. 6 .
Some of what he said last Sunday when I was having my earlier melt down such as " I'm not ready for you to be in a step mom role " are making me sick. Like ..... dude I have known her 5 months and BEEN a great step mom this entire time ( even if there isn't a label of that )! It makes me feel like he is preparing to leave ( and if he is just grow some fucking balls and do it ).
I will not give this much more time honestly.
I have made mistakes in the past ( giving men the benefit of the doubt and sort of " waiting " beyond my comfort ).
Yes, you gauged my age correctly.
lynn2009
09-17-2020, 05:54 PM
I found another beautiful house!!! I'm going to try to see it on Saturday. Wish me luck!!!!
carmen_b
09-17-2020, 06:32 PM
^ yes!!!!
SnuffleUffleGrass
09-18-2020, 12:19 AM
Random thought- I'm pleasantly surprised about how I learned to love box wine. Being from a wine region (Northern CA) I always looked down on cheap wines and box wine. Now I realize I was missing out. NO I'm not drinking it right now.
Also my boyfriend got an awesome new hot/cold travel mug as a "swag" gift from a contractor he is working with...I'm thrilled it's a $40 mug for free.
carmen_b
09-18-2020, 07:50 AM
J is here.
No sex and I made him take an Uber to hotel.
I’ll talk to him openly before doing anything else passive aggressive.
I didn’t communicate with him coming up and he got here like “ I wasn’t sure if I needed to get my own hotel ect.! “
I felt like I wanted a to give him a taste of the discomfort I feel in our day to day life.
On one hand .... he can say “ hey we need to slow the roll a little here “ but on the other I don’t have to be all cheery about it especially when he says things like “ evenings are family time “ . I have felt sick for 4-5 days about not being “ family “. If I’m not I’m not I guess . I just need to figure out what to do.
Maybe it’s me who is being a brat. It isn’t his responsibility to house me. I honestly just assumed he would meet me in the middle somewhat especially considering my house sit is open 60% of the time. I think it would be more fair if he BOTH offered to give time helping me find a place AND helped pay for it ( a room or apt ). I’d only need it 8-10 days a month ( in Oct and Nov ) but it might help relieve this issue. It seems beyond wasteful to need another resource beyond what he have ( two huge houses ) but it is what it is I guess.
carmen_b
09-18-2020, 07:58 AM
Snuff : I want that mug ! I’m on the road now I want hot tea constantly.
WendiStarr
09-18-2020, 08:28 AM
Why is it that my boyfriend finds it perfectly acceptable to go on trips with his suspiciously gay acting guy friend for 17 days out of the month, yet when I bring up me going out of town to visit my grandpa who has cancer, he gets all teary-eyed about it, like, "Really? How long would you be gone?" and asks if I'm sure the baby would be okay without me. I'd feel too guilty going anywhere without the baby anyways. Obviously I'd have to bring the baby with me because she's breastfed and is use to being with me 24/7 since birth but geeze! It was just a thought. I'm still nervous about traveling due to pandemic conditions so I doubt I'll go anywhere. I don't get why I'm expected to be here all the time while he gets to go hang out with his friend and go all over the state and out of state. I feel like I might as well be a single mom if I'm going to be alone all the time anyways. I'm thinking about one of these times when he comes back from a trip, going to my grandma's cabin up north or getting a hotel room up there for a few days, and saying nothing to him about it, so that when he comes home, he'll wonder where we are, and when he asks where we are, just give him a vague answer of "with a friend".
SnuffleUffleGrass
09-18-2020, 08:47 AM
Snuff : I want that mug ! I’m on the road now I want hot tea constantly.
Check thift stores, a lot of these mugs end up there since they're so common now.
I have a really battered one I found when I was on a strip trip & I keep using it b/c no harm if I lose it. Sadly I had a cute blinged out one I'm pretty sure I lost by forgetting it at my restaurant job. I'm still mad at myself for that.
JGB2009
09-18-2020, 05:49 PM
You make our conversations so exciting!!!!! Don't I wish!!!!
moneybags
09-18-2020, 08:00 PM
I would love to “retire“ in a commune with other like minded women. Better yet,
an ex sex worker commune. Omg that would be so crazy.
AChildOfBoredom
09-18-2020, 08:58 PM
I would love to “retire“ in a commune with other like minded women. Better yet,
an ex sex worker commune. Omg that would be so crazy.
I don’t know. I don’t think I’d want everyone to be too alike. You could say I have sort of a commune going here, but with quite an extravagant variety of people. We all have very different perspectives in pretty much everything, and I feel it’s a lot more interesting and worthwhile that way.
SnuffleUffleGrass
09-19-2020, 04:57 AM
I would love to “retire“ in a commune with other like minded women. Better yet,
an ex sex worker commune. Omg that would be so crazy.
You're always welcome at my house! You will have to help me with my cooking blog. I'm not so handy with social media.
lynn2009
09-19-2020, 11:58 AM
I found another beautiful house!!! I'm going to try to see it on Saturday. Wish me luck!!!!
I am making an offer! 5.5% over asking with inspection for informational purposes only. Offers are due in the morning so hopefully I'll hear by the end of the day tomorrow.
It's on a street with traffic instead of nestled into a neighborhood but there's a sidewalk, room to turn a car around in the driveway and it backs up into a cute little neighborhood for walking the dog.
chanzep
09-19-2020, 01:59 PM
Good luck
chanzep
09-19-2020, 02:02 PM
So I finally have a vacuum I like. My carpet was full of dirt and I had to do it twice be because the canister got full right away. My next place has to have flooring everywhere because this is disgusting. I think I'm going to hire a steam cleaner.
SnuffleUffleGrass
09-19-2020, 05:10 PM
So I finally have a vacuum I like. My carpet was full of dirt and I had to do it twice be because the canister got full right away. My next place has to have flooring everywhere because this is disgusting. I think I'm going to hire a steam cleaner.
I so feel this. I'm slightly annoyed the carpet at our new house is so light. Not the most pet-friendly color. Good thing I have a carpet shampooer.
Random- dinner turned out lovely, so did dessert.
AChildOfBoredom
09-19-2020, 08:55 PM
Got a call today from a friend who was freaked out about her hair ties “mysteriously” disappearing. She just got a cat earlier this week. There’s nothing mysterious about it.
chanzep
09-20-2020, 12:35 AM
Lol that's funny. My cat loves mine.
lynn2009
09-20-2020, 03:54 PM
I am making an offer! 5.5% over asking with inspection for informational purposes only. Offers are due in the morning so hopefully I'll hear by the end of the day tomorrow.
It's on a street with traffic instead of nestled into a neighborhood but there's a sidewalk, room to turn a car around in the driveway and it backs up into a cute little neighborhood for walking the dog.
Lost this one too. They had six offers as of yesterday. Idk how many more they got this morning.
The listing already updated and it sold for less than my offer, so it must have been all cash. Fucking asshole.
miss.a.p1600
09-20-2020, 04:23 PM
So I finally have a vacuum I like. My carpet was full of dirt and I had to do it twice be because the canister got full right away. My next place has to have flooring everywhere because this is disgusting. I think I'm going to hire a steam cleaner.
carpet is disgusting
the only benefit is no cold floor in winters
I vacuum mine at least 2-3 times a week now a days
and oddly there is no shortage of dust n dirt
AChildOfBoredom
09-20-2020, 06:52 PM
I heard carpeted bathrooms used to be a thing. Is this true? How in the hell?
miss.a.p1600
09-20-2020, 07:16 PM
^yes girl.
Gross!
I think it was a 70s and 80s thing.
I saw a house on Zillow with carpet in the entire bathroom
One of my relatives had carpet in their bathroom in their old house
AChildOfBoredom
09-20-2020, 07:18 PM
Why? Just… why? Who ever thought that was a good idea? How did they come to that conclusion?
miss.a.p1600
09-20-2020, 07:18 PM
I think I’m going through something or I’m just becoming a connoisseur of wine here lately. I’ve had 2 bottles in the past 2 weeks and craving more.
miss.a.p1600
09-20-2020, 07:21 PM
Why? Just… why? Who ever thought that was a good idea? How did they come to that conclusion?
only thing that comes to mind is probably those people who step out the shower wet and maybe don’t want to slip n fall but instead of just getting a shower mat they carpet the whole damn bathroom
moneybags
09-20-2020, 08:39 PM
Omg...California Bill gets signed to let prisoners get a job as firefighters after release. Awesome!
Good news is hard to come by these days. I’ll take it.
AChildOfBoredom
09-20-2020, 11:27 PM
only thing that comes to mind is probably those people who step out the shower wet and maybe don’t want to slip n fall but instead of just getting a shower mat they carpet the whole damn bathroom
As many times as I’ve heard gripes about guys with their aim not being true, toilets clogging and overflowing, etc., I don’t understand how anyone could’ve thought it was a good idea.
chanzep
09-21-2020, 06:53 PM
I live in South Texas and we only get a few cold days a year which I really enjoy now. I want flooring everywhere with just a few rugs. I vacuumed again today and canister full again. Carpet in bathrooms is gross.
whirlerz
09-21-2020, 07:53 PM
^yes girl.
Gross!
I think it was a 70s and 80s thing.
I saw a house on Zillow with carpet in the entire bathroom
One of my relatives had carpet in their bathroom in their old house
Why? Just… why? Who ever thought that was a good idea? How did they come to that conclusion?
As a woman w/male roomies, I shudder to think..:yikes:
TG I've my own br.
AChildOfBoredom
09-21-2020, 07:58 PM
I have microfiber mats I place outside the showers, but those get rotated and washed regularly. I have a couple area rugs, but no permanently installed carpeting. Nor would I want it, considering I’d gotten a puppy which needed to be house trained.
As a woman w/male roomies, I shudder to think..:yikes:
TG I've my own br.
I lucked out when I had a male roommate. Sort of. We shared a bathroom. He was good about that, just not always good about using the air neutralizer after having a shit.
whirlerz
09-21-2020, 08:08 PM
I have microfiber mats I place outside the showers, but those get rotated and washed regularly. I have a couple area rugs, but no permanently installed carpeting. Nor would I want it, considering I’d gotten a puppy which needed to be house trained.
I lucked out when I had a male roommate. Sort of. We shared a bathroom. He was good about that, just not always good about using the air neutralizer after having a shit.
Men are nasty, sorry.:yuck:
I put a solid air freshener in their br. I put a hand soap in there too.
I also run around w/Trader Joe's mini non aerosal room sprays, made out of essential oils.
Use it in the kitchen too.
AChildOfBoredom
09-21-2020, 08:28 PM
Well, I never said he was perfect. I kinda don’t have much of a leg to stand on if I’m going to be 100% honest. My introduction to Mexican food unleashed a plague upon this land, too.
WendiStarr
09-22-2020, 08:21 AM
They have bug repellant, rodent repellant..why can't they make people repellant? I'd totally spray that shit to keep undesirables away.