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~Carmen~
01-24-2020, 10:45 PM
Ok so that makeout session I had a couple months ago doesn’t count then cause I didn’t orgasm nor did I let him play with my pussy but my boobs were out and he sucked on them for a couple seconds - wait does this count?

Anyways I googled Hitachi and the results.....30 second orgasms....cotdamn!!!!

That depends on your definition of celibate. Mine is no men in any sexual situation. If yours is different, that's okay!

~Carmen~
01-24-2020, 10:46 PM
I fell off the wagon but rejoining ! :)

You are always welcome back! :)

trustfundkiller
02-18-2020, 05:59 PM
I'm basically celibate. The last time I had sex was in December with my ex and I regretted it. The last time before that was in July when I was still with doofus. He was a mistake, period. I only made that mistake because I was horny. I might start dating again within the next few months but sex is off the table until I meet someone deserving, who values me and is in it for the long haul. For the longest time my rule was "10 dates before sex" and that's a great way to separate the wheat from the chaff. I want to get to know someone and be able to see the situation clearly, and I want to know their real intentions.

Marina Starr
02-18-2020, 07:00 PM
When men want to come in for "coffee" at night after taking you out on dates not knowing you're celibate.

52800

~Carmen~
02-18-2020, 08:02 PM
When men want to come in for "coffee" at night after taking you out on dates not knowing you're celibate.

52800

"Coffee" turns into GTFO of my house.

Marina Starr
02-19-2020, 01:08 PM
52806

miss.a.p1600
02-23-2020, 12:16 PM
52806

Couldnt have agreed more.

I started a thread on this a long time ago but I am convinced most men only spend money on wives (sometimes not even till a divorce goes down) or adult industry women.

Working in adult industry was the best way to turn the tables on male cheapness, male entitlement

miss.a.p1600
02-23-2020, 12:18 PM
Or don’t make the mistake I did a couple months back n share Uber with them so you have to go back to their house. If you do share a ride......LEAVE that mf as soon as you get back and say you have a work project in the am

It’s too hard to not give in once the train gets set in motion (and you let the dude be the conductor) if you know what I’m saying


When men want to come in for "coffee" at night after taking you out on dates not knowing you're celibate.

52800

miss.a.p1600
02-23-2020, 12:51 PM
“Let’s go back to my place for coffee”

“Let’s share an Uber”

“Let’s go back to your place an watch a movie”

and other euphemisms for “Hey girl, I treated you to a nice evening/date, now you can compensate me and let me put my dick inside you”

Esixxx
02-27-2020, 08:06 PM
Celibate since April 2019. Each time I entertain the thought of getting to know men on a deeper level- it goes sideways from 0 to 100.

B.O.B. is my best friend, he does not fail me unless I forget to charge it. :D

~Carmen~
02-29-2020, 02:41 AM
Celibate since April 2019. Each time I entertain the thought of getting to know men on a deeper level- it goes sideways from 0 to 100.

B.O.B. is my best friend, he does not fail me unless I forget to charge it. :D

Welcome and congratulations on almost an entire year!

52871

miss.a.p1600
02-29-2020, 06:19 AM
Celibate since April 2019. Each time I entertain the thought of getting to know men on a deeper level- it goes sideways from 0 to 100.

B.O.B. is my best friend, he does not fail me unless I forget to charge it. :D

What’s B o B stand for?

~Carmen~
02-29-2020, 06:07 PM
What’s B o B stand for?

Battery operated boyfriend.

miss.a.p1600
02-29-2020, 09:35 PM
Celibate since April 2019. Each time I entertain the thought of getting to know men on a deeper level- it goes sideways from 0 to 100.

B.O.B. is my best friend, he does not fail me unless I forget to charge it. :D

Same

But my experience I find that...

9 times out of 10 they do something idiotic to mess up the momentum

Esixxx
03-01-2020, 12:14 PM
Welcome and congratulations on almost an entire year!

52871


Thank you :)

And damn I didn't realize it's almost been a year

Marina Starr
03-01-2020, 06:28 PM
Perfectly sums it up for me. I've never been a sexual person.

52886

miss.a.p1600
03-01-2020, 08:47 PM
^interesting. I’d like to know how you define being a “sexual person” like does that mean having any type of sexual activity or does it mean doing things that make you feel sexually attractive (which *could* lead to sexual activity)?

moneybags
03-10-2020, 06:10 AM
^^^I use to be fine without sex until I got older. Part of the celibacy club too. Keeps me sane and my life drama free.

miss.a.p1600
04-01-2020, 11:56 PM
Why is it harder during times like this?

I’ve been celibate for some time now and it’s been easy but times like this?!? I’ve thought about calling dudes up from my Rolodex and seeing what they’ll offer.

whodathoe
04-10-2020, 06:50 PM
Haven’t had sex since last January...and it wasn’t even worth it ��. After that I decide not to have sex unless I was in a relationship and most men aren’t even dateable (if one more guy ask if he can “chill in the car”) ��

After my exposure in the industry I can’t see me just going for a random hookup ever again.

Esixxx
04-10-2020, 09:14 PM
I made it one full year. Never really thought about it- until just now. The ex bf has been texting a couple times a week recently. Damn how times flies.

I love my drama free life :)

jasmine22
04-10-2020, 10:03 PM
Haven’t had sex since last January...and it wasn’t even worth it ��. After that I decide not to have sex unless I was in a relationship and most men aren’t even dateable (if one more guy ask if he can “chill in the car”) ��

After my exposure in the industry I can’t see me just going for a random hookup ever again.

The sex industry was supposed to be “degrading” but it made me see my worth. I’m celibate because giving into my sexual urges for a man that’s not a provider or willing to give me what I deserve isn’t worth it anymore. They make toys for that anyway....why risk a disease for 10 min of fun?;)

~Carmen~
04-11-2020, 02:03 PM
I made it one full year. Never really thought about it- until just now. The ex bf has been texting a couple times a week recently. Damn how times flies.

I love my drama free life :)

Congratulations! That's a huge milestone.

He wants what he can no longer have. Typical.

Drama free is the only way to fly :).

Hungry Bunny
01-04-2021, 11:59 AM
This morning I realized that I haven't had sex since Dec '15.

When I've attempted to enter a relationship, I had to cut it off because the guy seemed like he was pressing for sex, yet little effort had been made in getting to know ME. Dating for a few months doesn't make my panties fall off. There are guys online who get far less in return and spend $$$. I have no desire to sleep with a man who isn't head over heels about me and shows it with actions. I'm a biromantic asexual, so it's gonna take more than some stuffed animal and weak dates to get in the sugar cave.

These guys are just trying to get their dicks wet with as little effort as they can get away with. Lol. There's a pot for every lid, but don't let them guilt you!

Good luck to the ladies in finding a proper mate in 2021!!

NotANewGyal
01-04-2021, 06:05 PM
I honestly love celibacy. I am just so not into the drama men seem to be causing me lately. It is so silly and yet so boring and irritating lol. Anyways, I love charging for my time and energy, I feel more degraded dating, hence celibacy!

charlie61
01-04-2021, 08:01 PM
This morning I realized that I haven't had sex since Dec '15.

When I've attempted to enter a relationship, I had to cut it off because the guy seemed like he was pressing for sex, yet little effort had been made in getting to know ME. Dating for a few months doesn't make my panties fall off. There are guys online who get far less in return and spend $$$. I have no desire to sleep with a man who isn't head over heels about me and shows it with actions. I'm a biromantic asexual, so it's gonna take more than some stuffed animal and weak dates to get in the sugar cave.

These guys are just trying to get their dicks wet with as little effort as they can get away with. Lol. There's a pot for every lid, but don't let them guilt you!

Good luck to the ladies in finding a proper mate in 2021!!

I'm a biromantic asexual, too!! Omg! I'm so jazzed over here. :hug:

miss.a.p1600
01-04-2021, 09:26 PM
If I could go back to celibacy I would.

I went years being celibate and enjoyed it.

I’m not a fan of the “expectation” of sex in relationships. I do think women should be wise about their partner because men will try to get you in relationships or marry just to get all-access pussy

Hungry Bunny
01-05-2021, 09:49 AM
I'm a biromantic asexual, too!! Omg! I'm so jazzed over here. :hug:

Do you tell your prospects that you're a bi-ace? I tried a couple of times, but it seems that most ppl don't even really know what an asexual is or that we aren't all the same.

charlie61
01-05-2021, 01:49 PM
Do you tell your prospects that you're a bi-ace? I tried a couple of times, but it seems that most ppl don't even really know what an asexual is or that we aren't all the same.

Yeah, I'm very much out, but people have no idea what I'm talking about when i bring it up. They usually have questions, but it still doesn't really register for them until we get a bit deeper into the relationship. And i think the concept is just so foreign to non-aces. I've been in relationships with people for years who still struggle to understand. It's admittedly complex, especially since i have a decently high sex drive when it comes to getting myself off in private (sorry to be graphic), and have no history with abuse or anything like that, yet have no interest in partners trying to pleasure me sexually. I've figured out ways to hack my orientation in relationships, which has taken me a lot of time. I mean, you get it. It's very nuanced compared to non-ace orientations...

Hungry Bunny
01-05-2021, 03:11 PM
Yeah, I'm very much out, but people have no idea what I'm talking about when i bring it up. They usually have questions, but it still doesn't really register for them until we get a bit deeper into the relationship. And i think the concept is just so foreign to non-aces. I've been in relationships with people for years who still struggle to understand. It's admittedly complex, especially since i have a decently high sex drive when it comes to getting myself off in private (sorry to be graphic), and have no history with abuse or anything like that, yet have no interest in partners trying to pleasure me sexually. I've figured out ways to hack my orientation in relationships, which has taken me a lot of time. I mean, you get it. It's very nuanced compared to non-ace orientations...

I don't like that people think they can change my mind or that some bad experience caused me to feel the way I do. When I was still having penetrative sex, I'd try to get my bf to not bother me about phucking by giving him oral. It rarely worked. A man with pu$$y on his mind will have it on his mind regardless. If he didn't try that time, he surely did the next.

I agree that it is more complicated. I've only recently found out that we have our own flag. Lol. It's hard for me to explain to folks bc it is ingrained that sex is a part of a healthy relationship. It's a part of unhealthy relationships too! You don't need SEX to be intimate.

Have you found dating women to be easier because you don't have to deal with being poked? With men, I worry that if I throw them a bone (pun intended) they'll expect me to always partake in coitus.

charlie61
01-05-2021, 05:09 PM
I don't like that people think they can change my mind or that some bad experience caused me to feel the way I do. When I was still having penetrative sex, I'd try to get my bf to not bother me about phucking by giving him oral. It rarely worked. A man with pu$$y on his mind will have it on his mind regardless. If he didn't try that time, he surely did the next.

I agree that it is more complicated. I've only recently found out that we have our own flag. Lol. It's hard for me to explain to folks bc it is ingrained that sex is a part of a healthy relationship. It's a part of unhealthy relationships too! You don't need SEX to be intimate.

Have you found dating women to be easier because you don't have to deal with being poked? With men, I worry that if I throw them a bone (pun intended) they'll expect me to always partake in coitus.

Yes, that's one of the strategies i use, lol. My partner has a high sex drive, and i offset that with oral. When we first started dating, we were having sex twice a day, which is like... an insane amount for an ace to try to contend with, mentally and emotionally. Now, it's usually once a week on the weekend, and i give oral once or twice a week. I try to always initiate to help myself feel more in control of the situation. He seems very happy. I'm getting better at staying mentally present for all of that activity. It used to be really hard for me, but i feel like i can keep up now. And to be clear, this is all work I've chosen to do on myself. He would never, ever pressure me or anything like that. It's tough being romantically attracted to people but having no desire and deriving no satisfaction from partnered sex. It's much easier in many ways for me to have sex with people i don't care about, because i don't understand or feel the connection between sex and love. The more i care about someone, the less i understand sex.

It's kind of like being deaf and going to a dance club with your partner. The first time, it's like, umm, okay, we can do this for a bit, as long as you're enjoying it. But when you can't hear the music at all, and your partner wants to take you dancing for the hundredth time, the 200th time, and beyond...

I find it easier to date men, actually, because i find that with sex with women, they really need the sex to be two-way and emotionally connected, and I'm not great with either of those things. I think men are more comfortable continuing to have sex with me, knowing my limitations. I would not be comfortable being in a loving relationship with a heterosexual man and not meeting his emotional and sexual needs (because the two are definitely tied together, for men who are in love).

It sounds like you normally date women, when you're dating?

Hungry Bunny
01-05-2021, 11:37 PM
Yes, that's one of the strategies i use, lol. My partner has a high sex drive, and i offset that with oral. When we first started dating, we were having sex twice a day, which is like... an insane amount for an ace to try to contend with, mentally and emotionally. Now, it's usually once a week on the weekend, and i give oral once or twice a week. I try to always initiate to help myself feel more in control of the situation. He seems very happy. I'm getting better at staying mentally present for all of that activity. It used to be really hard for me, but i feel like i can keep up now. And to be clear, this is all work I've chosen to do on myself. He would never, ever pressure me or anything like that. It's tough being romantically attracted to people but having no desire and deriving no satisfaction from partnered sex. It's much easier in many ways for me to have sex with people i don't care about, because i don't understand or feel the connection between sex and love. The more i care about someone, the less i understand sex.

It's kind of like being deaf and going to a dance club with your partner. The first time, it's like, umm, okay, we can do this for a bit, as long as you're enjoying it. But when you can't hear the music at all, and your partner wants to take you dancing for the hundredth time, the 200th time, and beyond...

I find it easier to date men, actually, because i find that with sex with women, they really need the sex to be two-way and emotionally connected, and I'm not great with either of those things. I think men are more comfortable continuing to have sex with me, knowing my limitations. I would not be comfortable being in a loving relationship with a heterosexual man and not meeting his emotional and sexual needs (because the two are definitely tied together, for men who are in love).

It sounds like you normally date women, when you're dating?

Ahhh, look at you, summing up my sex life! Lol. I started having sex when I was 15. I thought things would get easier or that guys would leave me alone about it once I gave it up. I'm in my 30s now and they have always wanted more. Damn, I haven't smashed anyone since I was in my 20s. Now I feel kinda old 😲 Anyway, after several years of feeling like "this is just part of the relationship for the guy", I realized I was Ace.

Dating men is fun, because I like to have power over the men. Having sex with them, I feel like I lose some of that power. Plus, most guys are very undeserving. Lol. I may date one this year, but I don't plan to be penetrated. I used to only let guys go down on me, but some guys think they can talk you into "enjoying" their dick afterward. That can lead to a dangerous and uncomfortable situation.

My experience with women is more limited. It's something I'd like to lean into. I don't have issues connecting with them emotionally. I enjoy the way women feel. As a bi-ace, I've realized I have to be careful with straight friends. I may not try to sleep with them like some lezzys would, but I can still develop those more-than-friend feelings. Also, I've found that lesbians don't like Bisexuals and don't understand a Biasexual. Lol. They fear the bisexual will leave them for a man/cheat with a man.

I still want love and affection. I just don't want it to come with vagina stabbing and a risk of STIs.

miss.a.p1600
01-06-2021, 06:04 AM
This is the problem I’m having.

I’ve tried to do just oral so I wouldn’t have to have penetrative sex. But no - that’s exactly what men do. They just HAVE to fuck you with their dick. I think it’s an ego thing because they want to know that no other dude is fucking you n you’re not cheating on them.

charlie61
01-06-2021, 07:49 AM
^Girl, you sound more and more like a sex-disgusted asexual every day! I'm personally not disgusted by sex or sex-negative for the most part (to me, it's just like...i don't get it.), but your sentiment is quite common.

I'll stop threadjacking at this point, lol! Resource from asexuality.org if anyone is interested: http://wiki.asexuality.org/Asexuality

miss.a.p1600
01-06-2021, 07:56 AM
I don’t think I’d mind it - if it was good.

Problem is most dudes I’ve encountered are mediocre at best. And to find a guy that’s good at fucking would mean I’d have to sample like hundreds of dicks or sit there like a drill sergeant, order them around, and fucking coach their ass over n over till they get it right.

So yeah I guess kinda felt like I could relate to Hunny when she said she didn’t want the vagina stabbing lol!!!

*oh I just googled these terms. I’d say most times I’d fall into the range of “not interested” when it comes to penetrative sex with most guys

Esixxx
02-06-2021, 06:50 PM
Well... tonight just went weird.

I went out to dinner with a guy I made friends with at the job I just left. ( I thought this was going to be a dinner as friends- as I do have male friends.)

He's cool to talk with, attractive, well spoken. It was a good time, and as he was dropping me off at my place, he hugged me and I hugged back, then he went in for a kiss.

I feel stupid awkward at the moment- just not feeling it- I have been celibate for quite sometime now and not into the dating scene- just really have no desire. Eh...

(I just needed to get that out)

~Carmen~
02-06-2021, 07:42 PM
Well... tonight just went weird.

I went out to dinner with a guy I made friends with at the job I just left. ( I thought this was going to be a dinner as friends- as I do have male friends.)

He's cool to talk with, attractive, well spoken. It was a good time, and as he was dropping me off at my place, he hugged me and I hugged back, then he went in for a kiss.

I feel stupid awkward at the moment- just not feeling it- I have been celibate for quite sometime now and not into the dating scene- just really have no desire. Eh...

(I just needed to get that out)


Yikes! I'm sorry that happened to you.

Esixxx
02-06-2021, 07:58 PM
^^^ Thank you.

I am just feeling awkward about the whole situation. He sent a text a bit ago with how he looks forward to spending more time with me in the future- I just don't know how to break it down to him that I am not interested in all of that. I'm going to sleep on it before responding. I don't want to lead him on.

Like I like having friends and what not, but the idea of dating, sex- doesn't interest me and hasn't in a really long time, and I am okay with that.

~Carmen~
02-06-2021, 08:11 PM
^^^ Thank you.

I am just feeling awkward about the whole situation. He sent a text a bit ago with how he looks forward to spending more time with me in the future- I just don't know how to break it down to him that I am not interested in all of that. I'm going to sleep on it before responding. I don't want to lead him on.

Like I like having friends and what not, but the idea of dating, sex- doesn't interest me and hasn't in a really long time, and I am okay with that.

I wish I had some good advice but I'm not sure how I would handle that either. I'm the same as you, no interest in dating or sex.

I'm sure you will handle it just fine. Sleeping on it is a good idea. Good luck!

Holly_xoxo
02-09-2021, 03:12 PM
^^^ Thank you.

I am just feeling awkward about the whole situation. He sent a text a bit ago with how he looks forward to spending more time with me in the future- I just don't know how to break it down to him that I am not interested in all of that. I'm going to sleep on it before responding. I don't want to lead him on.

Like I like having friends and what not, but the idea of dating, sex- doesn't interest me and hasn't in a really long time, and I am okay with that.

If you haven't been dating him then you could just friendzone him without getting in to the details of why. I haven't been interested in dating for a long time either. Sometimes I miss the companionship but there hasn't been anyone in ages that got me excited. Hopefully he'll still want to be friends but if not, it's better that you get that out of the way sooner rather than later.

Esixxx
02-09-2021, 03:33 PM
If you haven't been dating him then you could just friendzone him without getting in to the details of why. I haven't been interested in dating for a long time either. Sometimes I miss the companionship but there hasn't been anyone in ages that got me excited. Hopefully he'll still want to be friends but if not, it's better that you get that out of the way sooner rather than later.

I haven't messaged him back- I just felt yuck after he kissed me without asking me (this wasn't a peck kiss.) And you are right about it happening sooner than later.

Holly_xoxo
02-09-2021, 04:16 PM
I haven't messaged him back- I just felt yuck after he kissed me without asking me (this wasn't a peck kiss.) And you are right about it happening sooner than later.

Good call. He shouldn't have tried to kiss you without you showing obvious interest first or initiating it.

moneybags
02-12-2021, 02:40 AM
I’m celibate and still a sex symbol...lol.

~Carmen~
02-12-2021, 11:09 AM
I’m celibate and still a sex symbol...lol.

Making money is much more of a thrill than sex;D

Marina Starr
05-11-2021, 03:30 PM
Feeling BLESSED with the gift of Celibacy.

Thank you Jesus for giving me the strength to keep my legs closed. #teamcelibate #celibatehoe

whirlerz
05-11-2021, 03:32 PM
Hi ya Marina! :)

Marina Starr
05-11-2021, 03:37 PM
54992

Hi ya Marina! :)

~Carmen~
05-11-2021, 04:21 PM
Feeling BLESSED with the gift of Celibacy.

Thank you Jesus for giving me the strength to keep my legs closed. #teamcelibate #celibatehoe

Amen to that! Cheers to all of we untouchable Goddesses:drink:.

izshadow
05-20-2021, 12:16 PM
I miss being in a relationship but I dont want to pursue one anymore cause I just dont want to have to deal with the sex phase of it. I'm Ace. I used to be demisexual but now just ace. I just have no desire and finding another ace partner would just be to exhausting.

moneybags
05-20-2021, 02:52 PM
I’m pretty much a born again virgin. The paradox of being a celibate cam model.