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EricaErotica
05-17-2017, 11:32 AM
You keep talking about how you need closure. I don't even think you know what that really means. You already know the truth of the situation. There is nothing else to know. You now need to just close this chapter of your life. The best way to do is to cease all contact with him and to stop analyzing him, his life, his girlfriend, etc.

foxirox
05-17-2017, 11:36 AM
I think you're in love with the idea of being in love. You say he is perfect, but you don't know him. Not really. He has a girlfriend and lives in another country...I think you need to end whatever it is and move on. Sorry if this seems harsh but I had a similar situation last year.

Met a guy online, he lived about 2 hours away from me. We spoke almost everyday...I confided in him and told him stuff I haven't even told my own family. We got really close and he was pushing for us to meet. I went down to London to see him and he basically stood me up. Later came a thousand apologies and we agreed to meet again. He suddenly went really quiet and weird. A few months later, he had got with someone else. I've never felt so used in my life. BUT - I'm so glad it happened it really taught me NEVER to get involved with anyone who buys a show from me. EVER. I treat camming now very much like a business. I don't care now sincere and nice the guy is, he is there to spend money and I am there to give him a show. End of.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 11:52 AM
I think you're in love with the idea of being in love. You say he is perfect, but you don't know him. Not really. He has a girlfriend and lives in another country...I think you need to end whatever it is and move on. Sorry if this seems harsh but I had a similar situation last year.

Met a guy online, he lived about 2 hours away from me. We spoke almost everyday...I confided in him and told him stuff I haven't even told my own family. We got really close and he was pushing for us to meet. I went down to London to see him and he basically stood me up. Later came a thousand apologies and we agreed to meet again. He suddenly went really quiet and weird. A few months later, he had got with someone else. I've never felt so used in my life. BUT - I'm so glad it happened it really taught me NEVER to get involved with anyone who buys a show from me. EVER. I treat camming now very much like a business. I don't care now sincere and nice the guy is, he is there to spend money and I am there to give him a show. End of.

I am really sorry this happened to you! hugs! I dont plan on meeting him anymore but makes me wonder if anyone met anyone from camsite and was treated with respect.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 12:00 PM
If he got another account to see models while pretending he only visits me and he is in love with me then he really is playing it to the max.

Tsani
05-17-2017, 12:15 PM
Girl, you NEED to move on. Just remove yourself from the entire situation. My opinion is that keeping him on as a customer isn't healthy for you at all. You said he's on a very limited budget and doesn't even take you true private, so you can't use the excuse you're milking him for money.. it's not even much money and is it worth the extra emotional work you're putting in talking to him?

I think you need to do the following:

1. Stop talking to him. Either just ban him without an explanation (though I have a feeling he might make another account to talk to you with), or tell him you're getting too attached and you need to remain professional... then ban him.

2. Stop looking at their facebooks. You're convinced it's not stalking, whatever, that's your opinion, but it's not healthy. Just stop.

Also, you seem to think that just because they're not married yet means he's not happy or not ready to commit. There can be other reasons for a couple not being married. I've been with my current partner for 10 years. One reason we're not married is because with the job he had, my insurance would cost way more if we got married. He now has a job with better benefits, but right now we're saving up to buy a house and can't save up for a wedding right now and a nice wedding is something that's important to us. Another reason is because marriage just isn't that important to us. We live together, we're pretty much married in everything but paper. Stop trying to look for reasons why he's not happy. His happiness is not your problem. The only time when it is, is when he's paying you to make his dick happy. That's it.

And don't be so sure that he's not having sex with his girlfriend. That's often a ploy guys use to make girls feel sorry for them. I've got a male friend who's 50 years old and he could have sex every day and still jerk off twice every day. 50 really isn't that old.

You say that you started camming to escape abuse. I've been abused in the past too and I know that you can't let yourself be a doormat. You can't let yourself be taken advantage of. You HAVE to know your self worth and stand up for yourself. Right now the best way to do that is to stop all communications with this man, stop lingering on it, stop looking at his girlfriend's facebook, stop giving it any thought! Use this as a life experience that you learned from.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 01:04 PM
If i ban him he might return different name and I will always wonder if the next new member is him. Already know it can be done because one of my regulars did it. He returned to my room after two month absence paid for stuff and said whi he was . I dont know why he got new account but the other is still there - he has two. He is normal takes me pvt and is not obsessed so maybe I will ask him next time he in my room why he has this new account.
The guy I thought am in love with most likely got himself new account to make him seem like he only visits me. He always in my room but never online otherwise? I find it difficult to believe he lost his interest in all other models since I already know he likes to play several fronts. This is just strange and he gaming me.
I might stop visiting the facebooks after a while it really makes me sad to look. But no ban for him it will not keep him out of my room am sure.

fbsmgirl
05-17-2017, 01:09 PM
Sometimes I wonder if the posters on this site are really truly over the age of 18 because I've met 14 year olds that have way more sense than this. I mean really, you're a cam girl, you haven't even met the guy in person, he was escaping reality when he came to you, you were paid for your time. Now you want more? If you can't handle duties this job requires, you may want to consider doing something else because this all sounds so unhealthy and kinda creepy.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 01:09 PM
Lol is kinda funny how he plays it so well, covers all tracks , slkips questions , probably plays with several models same game but here I have his real name and stuff. This game is kind of fun.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 01:11 PM
Sometimes I wonder if the posters on this site are really truly over the age of 18 because I've met 14 year olds that have way more sense than this. I mean really, you're a cam girl, you haven't even met the guy in person, he was escaping reality when he came to you, you were paid for your time. Now you want more? If you can't handle duties this job requires, you may want to consider doing something else because this all sounds so unhealthy and kinda creepy.

whatever! in camming real emotions get involved often is normal
if you dont get it maybe you dont understand camming

sexysusie
05-17-2017, 01:15 PM
I can't believe this thread is still going.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 01:16 PM
I was not the one who first tried to engage offline by the way! it was him !

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
05-17-2017, 01:25 PM
Since he loves you say that you had a serious medical bill pop up and you need help. Ask him for $1000 to help you pay for it. He loves you and if he's a man he should want to take care of the girl he loves. You can pull stuff like this. One ploy I heard of is planning to meet him, have him buy the ticket, then have soemthing happen that results in you needing to go to the emergency room that night. Ask for money to help pay for it. Make it so suddenly you've become very sickly and need meds and could use help with that. Milk him! He just played you. Be sad and upset that a person had the audacity to play with your precious heart and make him drain his wallet on you. Make it so bad that his gf finds out and he's less likely to pull this bs again. You deserve better. You deserve something real.

I personally like dating guys who are already in a relationship, but I don't just date the guy. I date the guy and the girl. If I do only date the guy for some reason the girl and I meet and talk and I know that it's cool and that I'm not stepping on anyone's toes.

As for the desire to skype and what-not, charge. Charge extra for the inconvenience of getting on Skype. You can use SkyPrivate (I decided not to because I don't like the payment methods) or NiteFlirt to charge. If he wants to keep chatting with you charge for it. Say your email got hacked (hell let's make you have a stream of bad luck that he can fix with his money) and you got a virus on your comnputer because of it, so now you don't like using email. Sign up with a PhoneSex or a sexting site and give him that number, so he has to pay per message. If he's really that into you he'll be willing to and won't be able to help himself.

Honestly I'm betting that he's just a player who played you to get freebies, but if you make things dire and he likes you even a little you might get something out of him.

Good luck girl.

This is bad advice. You are owed nothing.

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
05-17-2017, 01:29 PM
Lol is kinda funny how he plays it so well, covers all tracks , slkips questions , probably plays with several models same game but here I have his real name and stuff. This game is kind of fun.

You say that you aren't going to contact him or his people but then you post stuff like this? Dororthea girl this is really really bad because I think your perception is way off balance. This is starting to sound a little dangerous.

lildevil_kittie
05-17-2017, 02:24 PM
Lol is kinda funny how he plays it so well, covers all tracks , slkips questions , probably plays with several models same game but here I have his real name and stuff. This game is kind of fun.

No This Game is NOT in any way kind of fun! REREAD what you said

Why would it be kind of fun to get your feelings hurt by some scumbag who wants free shit?

Ofcourse he is covering his tracks and skipping questions because they are NOT relevant to him. He dont give a fuck about how you feel if he is doing those things and in return getting things for free because he is on this so called budget.

Alot of male and female customers have multiple accounts either they get banned or they dont want to be bothered by someone who is getting attached ie: COME to my room and spoil me type messages. I actually had some dude tell me this in my room I laughed at him because he probably did the same thing what this guy is doing to you or something to that nature.


whatever! in camming real emotions get involved often is normal
if you dont get it maybe you dont understand camming

YOU say this whenever someone has something to say that is VALID it is unhealthy and creepy obsessing over someone who is in a relationship for 16 or whatever years. It is showing HOW jealous you are about it


You asked for advice and we are giving it to you then you make little snide remarks when we are doing what we think is best for you to do in the end which is to JUST STOP and move on put your attention else where and make your money hun. IF you cannot get past this dude I don't think this job is for you.

Camming itself is stressful because you have a Role to play and be Strong and not let dickheads get to you on a personal level. which this is what happens if you let your guard down and it starts affecting your career it isn't worth it.


THE CLOSURE IS you need to peace out and ban the dude.

kortneykay
05-17-2017, 02:29 PM
Doro, CEASE CONTACT. You really are making yourself look absolutely CRAZY and DELUSIONAL. Yes, looking at a client's GIRLFRIEND'S fb (especially since he did NOT purposely give you his name) is CYBER STALKING. Making fun of her, as if you're even relevant, is crazy talk. Comparing yourself to a woman who doesn't even know you exist. You can't even get her man to take you private or tip you decently. Girl bye. And I can say this because I've been camming for 10 yrs.

Most of us may form crushes, but it doesn't go this far, especially with a man who's married/taken. MOST clients are taken, but their gf/wife is NOT OUR business. You're jerk off material for her man, and be okay with that because you SHOULD be getting paid for it. That's the trade off.

You're nothing but a cheap fantasy girl to him. He's the cheapest guy in your room and you've invested all this emotional time into him. 10 months of ego stroking, free messages and pic sharing, hours of fb stalking, asking for free skype, and throwing occasional pennies and he has your ass SHOOK!

Pathetic, demented, delusional. Know your place and block this man immediately or continue to torture yourself and waste time when you could be banking. You asked 'What should I do?' and you've had plenty of sweet ladies giving you advice which is more than enough considering how delusional and crazy you sound.


https://m.popkey.co/f13786/g3z5b.gif

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
05-17-2017, 02:52 PM
Real talk, I don't think I could fall in love with someone not knowing what they smell like?

anonymous camgirl
05-17-2017, 03:26 PM
LOL... I had a similar situation, I had dated a cam customer for a total of 3 months.. he was going to leave his wife and small child for me.. I wasn't sure if that would ever happen, but I sure enjoyed the attention I was getting.. gifts , $1000 a month and long privates!.. He was going to leave his wife for me!.. He didn't .. he was going through a midlife crisis AND his wife knew.. he flew out to meet me for the week and his wife was calling all the time knowing he was with me.. He broke up with me in one call and that was that.. never heard from him again.. camming was never the same again.. and I hated cam ever since then.. I guess you could say I became bitter towards cam customers.. especially those who fawn over you , talk about marrying you, meeting you .. etc etc.. it's all BULLSHIT!.. I mean my friends and sister met this guy, You want to know what hurt the most? ALL THAT MONEY I lost.. that money that was my PAYCHECK.. that I supported my kids with.. I had to go find more whales to replace him.. I can't believe how stupid I was.. But back then I actually believed in men being honest and integral.. boy was I wrong.. I know you said this guy is not a big spender. all the more reason to dump him.. my guy was at least making over 6 figures a year working for JAVA sun microsystems as one of their main engineers.. seriously find someone better to fawn over at least.

p.s. now you got me stalking a guy who I haven't thought of in years.. now he is senior software engineer at Apple.. lol





Yes I was thinking that too and considered it a sign that he really wants to be with me forever because he ready to leave relationship. Kept googling midlife crisiz and wondering if am going to get married to him because he never maried his girfriend over 16 years and maybe he still looking for the one.

Blovely
05-17-2017, 03:51 PM
I think its kinda funny how in almost every situation things are always the gf/wife fault. Its always the same excuse with these dudes....she's not freaky enough, she doesn't give me enough attention, she stopped keeping herself up, she's naggy, she's a bitch, she's crazy, etc. Like so its always what she's not doing huh.....ummm ok sure.

Anyways I've read similar stories on here and its always the same....the girl falls for a guy he either wasn't spending much or once they've moved to Skype he stopped paying and the girl allowed it. I don't know why girls allow money to be taken out of of these situation like it some how makes things real. Like ummm in real life money is still needed in relationships whether you're just dating or married, relationships aren't free they take money. In real life I still expect a dude to pay for dates and provide. All these dudes are doing is running game and some just don't seem to pick up on that.


whatever! in camming real emotions get involved often is normal
if you dont get it maybe you dont understand camming
Ummmm no they really don't. Emotions only get involved if you let them, if you don't play the game right, or if don't build tough skin. If you treat camming as a job/career and you treat these guys like a fantasy its very easy for emotions to not get involved. We don't all get emotionally attached.

These guys run game like I stated which is easy to detect after awhile and easy to play back once you've learned the game. You have taken his game as reality. When guys say they don't visit other models they're lying 99% of the time. That's all part of their game. When they come visit your room everyday and chit chat that is game in which they are trying to get your time and attention for free. Everything he's done is game.

I don't have anything else to add...I just think its silly that in these situations the girl always ends of loosing out on $$$ or is expected to stop wanting money because that some how makes things real. No its makes it so that the guy is getting everything for free.

TheBrownFox
05-17-2017, 04:27 PM
Nope. Years ago, I was falling for a #1 reg. on MFC, and was even contemplating getting on a plane to go to HIM (Crazy, right?). Then he goes all "I can't visit this site anymore, because I'm a Christian, and this isn't right" on me. Lol. So yeah, that's the story of a cam site reg reaching his "expiration date." I wonder wtf he ended up doing with those panties that he bought from me.....lmfao. Does he wear them on his head...or sniff them while he's reading John 3:16? :P

TrifilinCamHo
05-17-2017, 05:50 PM
It's kinda gross that the girlfriend in this situation is being assigned *any* blame or responsibility here. Like none of us have ever been lied to by a man.

Let's abandon every rational conclusion in regards to how this is actually going to end up for you and say that theoretically you guys are in fact madly in love. You move out of the country and he leaves his girlfriend to be with you. What makes you think he wouldn't turn around and do the exact same thing to you as he's doing to her right now? Because what he tells you leads you to believe that? What do you think he's telling her? Why would you want to be with someone who would treat any of their significant others like this? This dude is no prize.

You seriously need to let this go. Block him, do not keep him on as a customer. You let yourself get in way too deep and that is totally understandable. When the majority of our interactions with men involve constructing a fantasy and the illusion of a connection, feeling like you might actually have a real connection can be really appealing. I get it and I don't fault you for wanting it to be something. This guy is not it for you and every second you spend thinking about it, checking for him/his poor girlfriend on social media, and giving him FREE attention is losing you money and costing you valuable energy. Stop hustling backwards.

ETA: Closure does not ever come from the person you're trying to get closure from. It comes from you making closure with yourself.

h0ttie
05-17-2017, 05:52 PM
nottttt supporting this BUT tell him to leave his girlfriend if he is serious about you since your starting to feel "wrong" liking a guy whos taken.....he doesnt know you can see his facebook and stuff so if he lies you will know.

if you do want to lose him but are afraid if you block him and he will just come back on another name just start asking for money lol. "oh no i need 300 for a car repair" "i had a bill i forgot about do you think you can give me $200" etc.....

Icantdecide
05-17-2017, 06:38 PM
Real talk, I don't think I could fall in love with someone not knowing what they smell like?

Me either. For whatever reason it's super important to me..most likely physiological/biological attraction.

Genoveve
05-17-2017, 06:44 PM
ETA: Closure does not ever come from the person you're trying to get closure from. It comes from you making closure with yourself.

Preach.

miss.a.p1600
05-17-2017, 07:00 PM
If he got another account to see models while pretending he only visits me and he is in love with me then he really is playing it to the max.

yes he is playing it to the max. Not only does he have you questioning your rational thinking he also has One live in girlfriend/sugAr momma plus one naive love sick cam model that will do anything he wants.

If he's hustling her (by keeping a side piece while in what his girlfriend thinks is monogamous relationship), most likely he's hustling you too. Men are clever little bastards when it comes to getting their needs met. They will lie through their teeth and destroy families just for momentary pleasure.

you will look back at this in 3 years and laugh - if you haven't wrecked your mental sanity over this dude by then.

Please read Pussy Power it's a great book that may help you stay ahead of the games men play.

amanda121
05-17-2017, 07:06 PM
I do some indy skype shows and you wouldn't believe how many guys actually had their real names+ surnames written there, or in their email, or they told me their full name themselves! I actually googled some of these people, not that I care who they are, but I was just interested, if they are truly so reckless! I found their fb and other social media with all the personal photos, where they work, their girlfriends names, etc. One of them was high school teacher and one a lawyer, so def. people who have a lot to lose. And than they talked to me about their gfs, what they do in bed... Many guys are like that, they simply don't care if they get outed! So this is no proof of love.

They didn't care at all that I know, they even wanted to meet in rl and have sex, despite being married/ had gf.

Rispy_Girl
05-17-2017, 08:08 PM
This is bad advice. You are owed nothing.

Fair enough. You should value yourself more and strive for a better relationship than this online player.

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
05-17-2017, 08:30 PM
Fair enough. You should value yourself more and strive for a better relationship than this online player.

My issue is with involving this guys girlfriend in any way. I think that is a bad idea and completely unfair. Some people worry about cammers who give away freebies, I worry about the ones who scare the money away. I didnt mean to pick on you.

IvyRose
05-17-2017, 09:23 PM
SORRY ; long post!!

Dorothea there has been a time I felt like you are feeling right now, madly in love, blinded by it... for me personally everytime I pursuid the fairytales it always ended it being badly hurt.... Prob bec when your brain is so off balance when being atrackted to someone that deeply there is almost no way the guy or girl you are so madly in love with can even begin to come close o that perefct feeling/image you have of him/her
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/02/140206155244.htm
^article: What falling in love does to your heart and brain

From the article:
"Love lowers serotonin levels, which is common in people with obsessive-compulsive disorders," said Mary Lynn, DO, co-director of the Loyola Sexual Wellness Clinic and assistant professor, Department of Obstetrics & Gynecology, SSOM. "This may explain why we concentrate on little other than our partner during the early stages of a relationship."

When you keep seeying him or checking his fb or his gf her facebook you are keeping your brain off balance. You are feeding, and holding on to your strong feeling. I know it hurts like hell but you sooner you cut him loose the better.

Let me tell you about that time I met this gorgeous, amazing, talented and romantic Italian dude....

Dont they allways appear when we are most vunerable?? ALWAYS... whenever you feel stuck, or alone, or you are messed up or in a fight with your current bf THERE pops up you ex asking you to come back to him or you meet that most awesome person which you fall in love with at first sight...

Well I was in a messed up stated (highly depressed and on antidepressive) and there he was, just a day after when I told my mom I was highly attracted to Italian (dark hair toned skin) men. And OMG he even had blue eyes. He looked like a supermodel and he started chasing me even though I had a bf at the time (he slipped a candy with a note with his number on it in my hand while i was sitting next to my boyfriend... I mean the dude has balls.).
I fell madly in love with him at FIRST frigging sight, and I NEVER had that happen before. I am not someone who fancies looks before appearance. and I had never felt like this before at all.. ever.
We dated shortly even though I had a bf, (I had a open relation ship with that current bf) but I just knew i had too cut the Italian dude loose.. He was a professional dancer, he would never stay in one place long. I knew i would end up hurt esp bec I was so madly in love with him, there was no way he could live up to it (also I knew he would never be all mine; he is a dancer and a HIGHLY attractive person. Woman went mad around him.. at the night we met there were 2 girls who offered a 3some to him which he refused.. they went up to the table where we were all standing and asked him about it... offcourse he used it to impress me; letting all of his friends and me and my friends know he refused a awesome offer...).
I also knew I was experiencing eveything highly diff than he did, bec I knew I was so madly in love, and he just ended his long 6+ years relationship and was in a very diff state of mind than I was.
Luckily for me I have had tiny crushes before in which I had to restrain myself bec I knew I would be better off not dating that person, and managed even from young age (16) not to give in to emotions.
I went cold turkey from the Italian dancer by blocking him out of my life after he left my country (he would be coming back after a couple of months), and it was the best thing I ever did.

It hurted like hell, and I was crfying my eyeballs out for weeks curled up in bed. I though about him all day long for 2 months, I though I would never stop thinking or feeling different. But after 2 months of going cold turkey I didnt think about him all day long anymore, and now: years later he is comletely gone, out of my mind. I rarely think about him now, and I know it was better to cut him loose.

I just want you to know, that even though it seems kinda impossible, you can do this. You will feel better again in a couple of months, and when you look back at this you will feel so much better, and will prob think "what the hell was I thinking?!"..
It really helped me back than looking at it from a "science" kind of view, knowing it is a chemical reaction of the brain. you can break free from it though, but I dont think you will if you keep any form of contact

You know deep inside that something is not right, if you didnt you would not have posted for advice. You rationale is trying to stop you. Listen to you rational side and stop every contact with him. You know deep inside that following your lust/desire/in love feeling is not the best option right now, you are not in a right state of mind right now and it is impossible for you to make any decissions right now involving him and a future with him while you are still doped up with being "in love". Go cold turkey and see how you feel about him in 3 months, I just know you will see through his bs right away when you do go cold turkey.
See it as a lesson for the future, whenever you are so madly in love, you have to take a little step back and take a good look if that person is worth it, because you are at your most vunerable state right now

http://www.livescience.com/43395-ways-love-affects-the-brain.html

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 09:34 PM
Yes but how can I cut him lose? He knows exactly where I am online. And how do I end this fall in love thing.
When I look at it logically I see a man stringing women. I am not sure what to think. I dont think he is honest. But today I had successful time on cam and very grateful for the money and wonderful members. But am hurting and is because he was not around. And he tips me so little so am not missing the tips.
I did not look at facebooks today and dont really have much interest in that anymore. It makes me feel pain I can cut off. I am strong. But am not sure what to do about camming situation because I said am no longer infatuated but I am in love all over again today. I hope this passes.

Dorothea
05-17-2017, 09:38 PM
yes he is playing it to the max. Not only does he have you questioning your rational thinking he also has One live in girlfriend/sugAr momma plus one naive love sick cam model that will do anything he wants.

If he's hustling her (by keeping a side piece while in what his girlfriend thinks is monogamous relationship), most likely he's hustling you too. Men are clever little bastards when it comes to getting their needs met. They will lie through their teeth and destroy families just for momentary pleasure.

you will look back at this in 3 years and laugh - if you haven't wrecked your mental sanity over this dude by then.

Please read Pussy Power it's a great book that may help you stay ahead of the games men play.

I think you might be correct. I think is a game to him. I think he wants models to fall for him.

IvyRose
05-17-2017, 09:56 PM
Yes but how can I cut him lose? He knows exactly where I am online. And how do I end this fall in love thing.
When I look at it logically I see a man stringing women. I am not sure what to think. I dont think he is honest. But today I had successful time on cam and very grateful for the money and wonderful members. But am hurting and is because he was not around. And he tips me so little so am not missing the tips.
I did not look at facebooks today and dont really have much interest in that anymore. It makes me feel pain I can cut off. I am strong. But am not sure what to do about camming situation because I said am no longer infatuated but I am in love all over again today. I hope this passes.

Block him from your site, when he appears again under a diff name block him again.
Block his skype and his email, block his facebook and her facebook so you cannot look at it anymore.

I know he can come back under a diff username, but trust me, he will let you know that it is him. I had members coming back under another name while being blocked and they always tell me who they "really are (and with really I mean there old username, bec all other info is considered fantasy in my mind).
If he will come back and wont tell you its him, than you wont know, and you should not care about this bec if he chooses to do that than to me that is proof that he does not care about you in the way you would like and was playing you hard. (bec if he does care a lot he would not be able to be around you without you knowing it is him)

You can choose to write him a last email or something an dlet him know why you are cutting him off if you wanna do that so you will have some form of closure that way



^this is also the way hopw you end this "falling in love thing". End your obsessions and feeding your emotions, dont contact him dont look at pictures, delete all your old emails from him, just: everything. ALlow yourself to feel the anger and hurt, and after that move on.

IvyRose
05-17-2017, 10:05 PM
I think you might be correct. I think is a game to him. I think he wants models to fall for him.

he is not special. I know you feel anger right now, but almost every member I met online has the same objective (meeting up for real and fuck or date; which also results in the same)
I bet you have been tried out by a lot of guys, like we all are but normally you could see past the bs. Because you feel in love right now you couldnt.

He is like everyone else on a camsite though

IvyRose
05-17-2017, 10:12 PM
I have this vid in my mind all the time reading through this all
Just for a comical, light break in between your heavy feelings


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngLEhVU1Ezk

you know you can do something against it, and it is blocking an deleting all contact/emails/pictures/ all of it
A lot of girls have been giving you this advice allready

Holding on to the thought you cannot do this bec he will MAYBE come back under another name, or keeping an eye out of facebook to protect yourself or anybode else etc etc are all excuses to not move on and you know it... If not you are succesfully fooling yourself out of it
Let go of the excuses and do the thing neccesarry to move on. If not carry on and stay stuck in limbo. Its your choice, its your life

Good luck , I know its hard! I wont be writing anymore bec there is nothing else to add!
<3

TrifilinCamHo
05-17-2017, 10:24 PM
Yes but how can I cut him lose? He knows exactly where I am online. And how do I end this fall in love thing.

There are literally 5+ pages of replies here telling you how and why to cut him loose. BLOCK HIM.

maddiebabe
05-17-2017, 11:17 PM
I do some indy skype shows and you wouldn't believe how many guys actually had their real names+ surnames written there, or in their email, or they told me their full name themselves! I actually googled some of these people, not that I care who they are, but I was just interested, if they are truly so reckless! I found their fb and other social media with all the personal photos, where they work, their girlfriends names, etc. One of them was high school teacher and one a lawyer, so def. people who have a lot to lose. And than they talked to me about their gfs, what they do in bed... Many guys are like that, they simply don't care if they get outed! So this is no proof of love.

They didn't care at all that I know, they even wanted to meet in rl and have sex, despite being married/ had gf.

Guys don't care about being outed because they have zero consequences for associating with or using the services of sex workers. We as sex workers must suffer all this social stigma and bs if we are outed- I guess that is why it helps to not give a fuck, but not everyone can do that. Seriously at my last real job one of the top management guys got caught in a prostitution string and it was on local news and just everyone at work and beyond knew the names of the guys they found using hookers. Guess what? The guy still has his job there (I have friends there so I know these things) and nobody says anything at all to him about it. It's A ok. I sometimes wonder if I still had a real job and everyone found out I'm a camgirl.. what would happen to my real job? Would I lose it? Or would I be able to stay there, but in that case I know everyone would slutshame me etc? This is so backwards and fucked up.

Yeah and as everyone says never fall in love with a regular. You are playing a game to get the money, and he is playing a game with you. Love should never be in this equation. Sorry if that is insensitive, but it's the truth. Get rid of this manipulative asshole. Find a guy in real life- I just don't understand how someone can even fall in love with any of these guys even your most favorite customer.. just hell fucking no.

For goodness sake you are a woman- it's easy for us to find/get men.

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 02:07 AM
SORRY ; long post!!

Dorothea there has been a time I felt like you are feeling right now, madly in love, blinded by it... for me personally everytime I pursuid the fairytales it always ended it being badly hurt.... Prob bec when your brain is so off balance when being atrackted to someone that deeply there is almost no way the guy or girl you are so madly in love with can even begin to come close o that perefct feeling/image you have of him/her
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/02/140206155244.htm
^article: What falling in love does to your heart and brain

From the article:
"Love lowers serotonin levels, which is common in people with obsessive-compulsive disorders," said Mary Lynn, DO, co-director of the Loyola Sexual Wellness Clinic and assistant professor, Department of Obstetrics & Gynecology, SSOM. "This may explain why we concentrate on little other than our partner during the early stages of a relationship."

When you keep seeying him or checking his fb or his gf her facebook you are keeping your brain off balance. You are feeding, and holding on to your strong feeling. I know it hurts like hell but you sooner you cut him loose the better.

Let me tell you about that time I met this gorgeous, amazing, talented and romantic Italian dude....

Dont they allways appear when we are most vunerable?? ALWAYS... whenever you feel stuck, or alone, or you are messed up or in a fight with your current bf THERE pops up you ex asking you to come back to him or you meet that most awesome person which you fall in love with at first sight...

Well I was in a messed up stated (highly depressed and on antidepressive) and there he was, just a day after when I told my mom I was highly attracted to Italian (dark hair toned skin) men. And OMG he even had blue eyes. He looked like a supermodel and he started chasing me even though I had a bf at the time (he slipped a candy with a note with his number on it in my hand while i was sitting next to my boyfriend... I mean the dude has balls.).
I fell madly in love with him at FIRST frigging sight, and I NEVER had that happen before. I am not someone who fancies looks before appearance. and I had never felt like this before at all.. ever.
We dated shortly even though I had a bf, (I had a open relation ship with that current bf) but I just knew i had too cut the Italian dude loose.. He was a professional dancer, he would never stay in one place long. I knew i would end up hurt esp bec I was so madly in love with him, there was no way he could live up to it (also I knew he would never be all mine; he is a dancer and a HIGHLY attractive person. Woman went mad around him.. at the night we met there were 2 girls who offered a 3some to him which he refused.. they went up to the table where we were all standing and asked him about it... offcourse he used it to impress me; letting all of his friends and me and my friends know he refused a awesome offer...).
I also knew I was experiencing eveything highly diff than he did, bec I knew I was so madly in love, and he just ended his long 6+ years relationship and was in a very diff state of mind than I was.
Luckily for me I have had tiny crushes before in which I had to restrain myself bec I knew I would be better off not dating that person, and managed even from young age (16) not to give in to emotions.
I went cold turkey from the Italian dancer by blocking him out of my life after he left my country (he would be coming back after a couple of months), and it was the best thing I ever did.

It hurted like hell, and I was crfying my eyeballs out for weeks curled up in bed. I though about him all day long for 2 months, I though I would never stop thinking or feeling different. But after 2 months of going cold turkey I didnt think about him all day long anymore, and now: years later he is comletely gone, out of my mind. I rarely think about him now, and I know it was better to cut him loose.

I just want you to know, that even though it seems kinda impossible, you can do this. You will feel better again in a couple of months, and when you look back at this you will feel so much better, and will prob think "what the hell was I thinking?!"..
It really helped me back than looking at it from a "science" kind of view, knowing it is a chemical reaction of the brain. you can break free from it though, but I dont think you will if you keep any form of contact

You know deep inside that something is not right, if you didnt you would not have posted for advice. You rationale is trying to stop you. Listen to you rational side and stop every contact with him. You know deep inside that following your lust/desire/in love feeling is not the best option right now, you are not in a right state of mind right now and it is impossible for you to make any decissions right now involving him and a future with him while you are still doped up with being "in love". Go cold turkey and see how you feel about him in 3 months, I just know you will see through his bs right away when you do go cold turkey.
See it as a lesson for the future, whenever you are so madly in love, you have to take a little step back and take a good look if that person is worth it, because you are at your most vunerable state right now

http://www.livescience.com/43395-ways-love-affects-the-brain.html

This is really so helpful thank you! just read it and it made me feel so much better! :)
Loved the what I was thinking part. Yeah would be great to look back and think that way...The thing is am not totally ready ready to let go I want some more pm , more conversation, closure...He is probably going to leave himself move on to another model. That is how it is going to end and it will hurt for a while but he will be gone and I will get over it.
I am so reluctant to let go now. I want to but maybe in few days...
But am more reserved now and already see some difference in me. I mean I feel am in love but have no desire to email him, no desire to even pm. I regret sending him love notes before he must be so empowered now and it gets on my nerves. But...I have difficulty just letting it all go.
Also wanted to add I have many regulars in my room, high tippers , small tippers , nice guys and this feeling is a first time for me.

JamaicanAliesha
05-18-2017, 03:52 AM
Guys don't care about being outed because they have zero consequences for associating with or using the services of sex workers. We as sex workers must suffer all this social stigma and bs if we are outed- I guess that is why it helps to not give a fuck, but not everyone can do that. Seriously at my last real job one of the top management guys got caught in a prostitution string and it was on local news and just everyone at work and beyond knew the names of the guys they found using hookers. Guess what? The guy still has his job there (I have friends there so I know these things) and nobody says anything at all to him about it. It's A ok. I sometimes wonder if I still had a real job and everyone found out I'm a camgirl.. what would happen to my real job? Would I lose it? Or would I be able to stay there, but in that case I know everyone would slutshame me etc? This is so backwards and fucked up.

Yeah and as everyone says never fall in love with a regular. You are playing a game to get the money, and he is playing a game with you. Love should never be in this equation. Sorry if that is insensitive, but it's the truth. Get rid of this manipulative asshole. Find a guy in real life- I just don't understand how someone can even fall in love with any of these guys even your most favorite customer.. just hell fucking no.

For goodness sake you are a woman- it's easy for us to find/get men.

exactly. ^^^

CatBBW
05-18-2017, 06:10 AM
I think I will keep him around as client and of course say nothing and just back away from the romance but possibility of banning him comes close.

Don't reply to any of his emails (play the "I got hacked/a virus" card as a previous post suggested) and if he tries talking romance etc in free, tell him you can't possibly talk about that in free as it upsets your other viewers/distracts you from earning your wage, however if he really wants to go further he needs to take you to private so you can concentrate on just him properly and discuss whatever he wants. By the sound of it, he will not ever do this, and after just a few times where he doesn't go private but just sits there (or moans about the new "rules") you can ban him.

CatBBW
05-18-2017, 06:36 AM
This is really so helpful thank you! just read it and it made me feel so much better! :)
Loved the what I was thinking part. Yeah would be great to look back and think that way...The thing is am not totally ready ready to let go I want some more pm , more conversation, closure...He is probably going to leave himself move on to another model. That is how it is going to end and it will hurt for a while but he will be gone and I will get over it.
I am so reluctant to let go now. I want to but maybe in few days...


In which case there's nothing else that anyone can say. My final bit of advice is similar to my last post - charge him for all contact. Charge for PMs, conversation, watch how he's not willing to spend on you but whiiiines that he wants it for free cos "we've got something special". Push him to show his true, moany, middle-aged, egotistical, selfish personality by applying some rules and boundaries to your "special" relationship.

Nikki_Fox
05-18-2017, 08:36 AM
re old men cumming - I have a skype cust who is 60 and will cum 4 times in 20 minutes -and he will call me multiple times a day on occasion and at least a coupe times a week or more - seriously and he cums A LOT!!!! each time huge amounts - pretty amazing - if he was a cam dude he would bank - lol

Best of luck girlie - you know what you need to do - I hope you find the strength to do it!!

absolutelyadorable
05-18-2017, 11:39 AM
This is bad advice. You are owed nothing.

Rightttttttt I was just about to say behavior like that gets people killed.

OP, I wouldn't even bother milking the guy. Just cut your losses, block him, and move on. You're young and you have a lot going for you so why waste that on someone who's clearly playing games? No amount is worth your sanity and peace of mind.

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 11:44 AM
I have to say if I put a different member name to all this would really get rid of him orjust ignore I realized. Small tips , pushing free skype , talking about beung in love meeting and all this in such a shy manner. He is skilled.
Some other guys tip me large and take me true pvt they never mention skype. His photos looks are great but offsite pics he looked different.
He was not in my room yesterday !! I was sad but today I feel better.
I think I should really take advice of people in this thread because every time so far got the right advice and everyone is saying more or less same thing. I think he is extremely manipulative and mesed with my head. He tips so little is annoying. Have bigger tippers recently and feel like he does not value me. I think he is cheap and self centered. In real life I dont like cheap guys so I dont even know what am doing. Gonna read advice here over and over before going on cam. If I get rid of him will be losing about $5

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 12:16 PM
LOL... I had a similar situation, I had dated a cam customer for a total of 3 months.. he was going to leave his wife and small child for me.. I wasn't sure if that would ever happen, but I sure enjoyed the attention I was getting.. gifts , $1000 a month and long privates!.. He was going to leave his wife for me!.. He didn't .. he was going through a midlife crisis AND his wife knew.. he flew out to meet me for the week and his wife was calling all the time knowing he was with me.. He broke up with me in one call and that was that.. never heard from him again.. camming was never the same again.. and I hated cam ever since then.. I guess you could say I became bitter towards cam customers.. especially those who fawn over you , talk about marrying you, meeting you .. etc etc.. it's all BULLSHIT!.. I mean my friends and sister met this guy, You want to know what hurt the most? ALL THAT MONEY I lost.. that money that was my PAYCHECK.. that I supported my kids with.. I had to go find more whales to replace him.. I can't believe how stupid I was.. But back then I actually believed in men being honest and integral.. boy was I wrong.. I know you said this guy is not a big spender. all the more reason to dump him.. my guy was at least making over 6 figures a year working for JAVA sun microsystems as one of their main engineers.. seriously find someone better to fawn over at least.

p.s. now you got me stalking a guy who I haven't thought of in years.. now he is senior software engineer at Apple.. lol
there are so many posts I missed some and am reading all again and first time this
I guess am lucky this guy is NOT a whale. Lol. Not even close.
Sorry this happened to you and thanks for the story share. Yeah am lucky. Lucky he is not a whale, lucky his name fell into my hands, lucky for this forum and great advice. Lucky did not start doing skype for him "out of love" . Unfortunately already sent him love notes but I guess cant win all! Still am so grateful for all advice here and info.

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 12:21 PM
So his wife knew and still wanted him? wow
no wonder these guys abuse women is because wives girfriends so forgiving he run back to momma after dicking some girl and telling love lies.
Before i said his girlfriend looks naive dumb. Well he picked her for a reason! He knows he can do whatever he wants in that relationship is obvious to me he is into naive women and he does not even have any feelings most likely is all about his dick if there are any.

anonymous camgirl
05-18-2017, 03:23 PM
Yea , He used to tell me it is the british way to have a mistress on the side!..LOL.. that's where he was from originally and then moved to California


So his wife knew and still wanted him? wow
no wonder these guys abuse women is because wives girfriends so forgiving he run back to momma after dicking some girl and telling love lies.
Before i said his girlfriend looks naive dumb. Well he picked her for a reason! He knows he can do whatever he wants in that relationship is obvious to me he is into naive women and he does not even have any feelings most likely is all about his dick if there are any.

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 04:24 PM
for men :
british way european way midlife crisis boys will be boys

for women :
whore

Dorothea
05-18-2017, 04:33 PM
received long email from him today in which he confessed his love for me and this email is very beautiful
I seriously anonymous camgirl thank you for your post because I need this. He has a way about him that gets to me.

TrifilinCamHo
05-18-2017, 04:37 PM
received long email from him today in which he confessed his love for me and this email is very beautiful
I seriously anonymous camgirl thank you for your post because I need this. He has a way about him that gets to me.

OK. I'm done here. When this all blows up in your face go back through this thread and try to learn something.

P.S. You're reaping some seriously bad karma carrying on with someone who is involved like this.

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
05-18-2017, 04:44 PM
Alright folks I'm out

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/6d/5e/4b/6d5e4bc8e95133c97efe847dfd207a21.gif

bbwbrianna
05-18-2017, 06:04 PM
As another poster said, just because another person doesn't agree with you on this forum doesn't mean they aren't offering you support. You just don't seem to want to hear the truth. It seems this guy is getting a lot of free attention from you next to near nothing because you want to believe he loves you. If that were the case you would be together now. He would not be with his girlfriend right now. Stalking her on facebook is a bad idea and makes you look a little off center. He is doing a good job of playing you. Men will tell women what they want to hear if they think they will continue getting free attention from her. If you're not serious about making money why not cam? I have to wonder why these guys keep thinking they can get my attention for free and be in a relationship with me and now I know why. Some girls give it away for nothing apparently. With that said I'm out because the OP doesn't seem to get it when it's been explained over six pages long.