View Full Version : 2019 DATING Adventures Thread (2018 continuation)
carmen_b
08-20-2019, 10:44 PM
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carmen_b
08-26-2019, 05:42 PM
Week #2 on the no dudes plan. ;)
No communication with anyone last 6-7 days.
Feeling refreshed and more energized. I didn't think it was really working until I felt a calm feeling yesterday .
Took myself to lunch today at one of the best restaurants in the city. The process of getting dolled up and going out I'm keeping .... just on SOLO outings.
carmen_b
08-28-2019, 10:43 AM
20 days since any sexy attn but whose counting ( lol ).
It wasn’t even that good either. :/
Leaning towards getting back into the game in a week or two.
Texted B that I wasn't dating but asked if I could touch base with him in a week or two and see if he is still single.
I want to see where he lives haha ( or at least position myself to v.s. having that mystery element there as with Mr. Dissapointment ). I will tell him I will be in his area in a week probably ( he lives 10 miles north of me ). I am there often to see my niece and nephew.
carmen_b
08-30-2019, 02:17 PM
( B )
How common would it be to have an ex wife who DIDN'T change their name back to the maiden name ?
If he isn't married ...... I know he's busy and has his kids 2-3 nights a week ...... I thought my twice a week needs might fit in there somewhere. Ugh. ;/
It is possible FB busted me for my online stalking. I know it always " recommends " anyone who looks you up as a friend. I was lazy and didn't use my fake account looking him up. I didn't click on his LinkedIn - I know that site will show who looks at you.
carmen_b
09-02-2019, 09:03 PM
I have to admit .... I like the tall butcher ( M ) even more now that I spied on his FB .
He has all these beautiful Alaska photos.
There are many in his Alaskan Life where he is ruggedly handsome ( holding big fish ect ) and out in the wild.
I grow food as one of my skill sets and he hunts so we talked last time about being good candidates to survive a econ. collapse ect. as a team.
carmen_b
09-03-2019, 01:44 PM
^ He got hurt at work ( back ) . The scheduling dates thing has been very " off " . He just isn't feeling great.
;/ I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt .
If I don't smoothly transition to seeing M twice a week ...... I'll bail .
I have a lot to do today anyway ( my dancer trip is 3-4 days, a lot of prep for it ). It's kind of nice to have the evening to myself v.s. knowing I need to entertain anyone ( my mood is a factor ).
Next week if there isn't smooth pursuit vibe / easy scheduling I'll have an issue. It's going well so far.
He was so easy with the dancer reveal. I almost want to invite him to see me at the club ( no one ever has ).
AChildOfBoredom
09-05-2019, 04:24 PM
Went on a date last night, after much badgering for me to go. Of course, it was someone trying to set me up with her boyfriend’s single friend… at least this one realized it wasn’t happening and didn’t start acting desperate. I will give him credit for creativity… not just some bland dinner and a movie date. It was actually fun. There just weren’t any sparks flying for me.
carmen_b
09-06-2019, 09:31 AM
I don't feel it's asking for too much to have an idea when I'll see the person I'm seeing 2-3 days ahead ( especially managing my very stacked schedule ).
What do you guys think ? Would you consider it a deal breaker if someone isn't planning 2-3 days ahead ( my preference ) ?
Why can't I just have EXACTLY what I want ? Lol. Such as " lets see a movie Sunday at 8 ".
I am promising myself now Ill bring it up ( or bail ) if he doesn't make time for me at least twice this week. It's isn't his fault that he caught me after Mr. Disappointment but that was a BIG lesson. I never want to be caught in that trap of feeling like I'm having to PULL at a partner for time ....... and my twice a week needs are EASY as well.
carmen_b
09-07-2019, 01:54 PM
^ Its turns out I got exactly what I wanted.
Plans Sunday at 8 haha.
We established it old school ( phone call ) .
( I er towards paranoia of having to fight for time and attention from Mr Disappointment ... kind of seeing that now )
carmen_b
09-07-2019, 11:12 PM
He wants to add me as a friend on FB . Should I ? Haha. Does it take away the mystery ?
miss.a.p1600
09-08-2019, 06:04 AM
^i loathe when guys ask that.
I personally would not. Because it can get too messy. They’ll stalk your profile, try to sum you up based off your profile, do attention seeking shit like post shirtless selfies or post stories and see if you viewed them, act like psychos if you don’t friend them or if you unfriend them, etc
But of course they get alarmed if they ask and you refuse.
Now this is just me, ONLY if I saw it going somewhere Id add him to my restricted list (that’s like a glorified “friend” who can only see your public updates. Basically what they’d see if they weren’t your fb friend anyways).
Id treat Facebook like my pussy, “can’t come in unless I know for certain it’s going somewhere”
carmen_b
09-09-2019, 09:10 AM
It was a nice outing with M.
Sampled new beers at the brewery near my house and had a good talk.
We talked about dating experiences and I was able to share the Mr. Disappointment story .
I don't feel like that affects me much now but it definitely did a month ago when I met M initially.
He hasn't dated much in the last couple years ( he was involved with someone bi-polar and nuts in some other ways he says ).
The plan is to take it slow and easy. We both feel like seeing other 2 times a week sounded good.
The sex is good.
He is really enthusiastic which I love ( at the Brewery he mentioned hoping we would fuck later and we started making out and leaving quickly ). I mentioned a couple things I liked and he remembered / delivered . ;)
There are things that bother me. He is a heavy screen user ( we woke up this morning and he was using his phone in bed ) and he also seems to like the TV on a lot. I like a very quiet house . It may take some adjusting in the future ( + noise cancelling headphones for me ).
carmen_b
09-09-2019, 09:34 PM
^ Edit to this. No more sleepovers allowed I think when it's a business day the next day. When I'm not out of town stripping I'm a business lady in my city 9-6 and I like to keep my hours precise.
I think we are not used to sleeping in the same bed. I thought I did ok but I lost nearly HALF my work day . I was dying of exhaustion and had to go home and rest.
I did get fucked silly but I don't think it was that. I think it was not sleeping quite right so I'll have to lay down that boundary.
queenelayliah
09-11-2019, 01:16 AM
I know this is suppose to be my personal dating adventures but i just HAD to share this little gem. I was on a marriage site reading about how to improve sex & intimacy in relationships ( even though I知 not married). I was reading the comments and saw this and just thought wow, I知 glad I知 not married to this asshole.
51898
51897
NitaBaby
09-11-2019, 04:33 AM
I know this is suppose to be my personal dating adventures but i just HAD to share this little gem. I was on a marriage site reading about how to improve sex & intimacy in relationships ( even though I知 not married). I was reading the comments and saw this and just thought wow, I知 glad I知 not married to this asshole.
51898
51897
When you marry a child, this is the mental math that they do.
carmen_b
09-11-2019, 05:50 PM
^ Something is totally off there.
carmen_b
09-11-2019, 05:54 PM
M was such an amazing mountain man partner in the forest ! We went to a cabin in some rain and it cleared up getting there. We had a beautiful lake to ourselves for sunset and a drink. SO nice !
BUT ..... wtf is it with these dudes not bringing food and drink when I say " the cabin is off grid ".
He totally OWES me a nice dinner out now. I will not be quiet about it.
Our dates have been on the low key side. ;)
He was GREAT company full of wild Alaska stories .
No sex this time haha he claims I " rode him way hard " a couple days ago and hurt his pelvic bone lol.
He offerred lots of affection .... hugs / kisses .....+ his usual stream of compliments ....... and holding me while falling asleep. ;)
carmen_b
09-16-2019, 08:13 PM
My family was super quiet and awkward with M .
Parents had just done a hike / you could tell they didn’t want to be at dinner.
Then he announced in the car he wasn’t up for sex most likely ( an hour before it was an option ?!? ).
I am thinking of breaking it over a few factors .......
carmen_b
09-22-2019, 06:31 PM
Wow.
Cabin trip 2 and he really got his shit together. He brought tons of great food.
Brought weed and giggled at a movie. Watched the stars. Damn ..................
carmen_b
09-24-2019, 07:21 PM
He said yesterday he deleted his Tinder.
I didn't really think about it as I told mine to " not show " me to anyone the last few weeks.
It's cute but it also made me nervous .... like ......... you were still screwing around on an app ( I had assumed he had not interacted with the app at all for a few weeks )?
I explained that I HATE those initial interactions ( the " chit chat " ) which I know is a factor of why I tend to abandon the apps before the person I'm seeing does . I tend to not talk to anyone if something keeps " going " past date 2-3.
I guess I should delete it too in a ceremonial fashion ?
Yesterday he honestly made me a little nervous ( said I make him happy and that he has referenced me as his girlfriend to friends ).
miss.a.p1600
09-25-2019, 04:56 AM
Settled is what you wanted ... why the nervousness though?
carmen_b
09-25-2019, 10:11 AM
He has a larger body type and I am find myself " stuck " on it . I wish he would lose 30-35 pounds or so ( his intention ) and that type of loss I know takes place over 6 - 9 months. It isn't like it will happen in 2-3 months. I worry about his motivation levels with things due to being in that position ( fully honest ).
I have found in getting to know him better in the last two weeks is that he kind of " allows " himself to not sleep at normal hours. He isn't training his body to sleep in an 8 hour block. It could be messed up from coming back from Alaska where the lighting is 20 hours a day where he was . I've set a boundary on that . On Sunday, I was up at 2a.m. with him ( way past my Midnight - 8 a.m. schedule I like to sleep ) . I had to tell him the next day it was the last time I'd be able to do that.
Overall things are well ( treats me really well ). I just had my doubts a few weeks ago because it felt like he wasn't aggressive enough in his " pursuit " . I have known him 7 weeks tomorrow and do feel like things are clicking into place better.
carmen_b
09-26-2019, 08:42 PM
I told him I was trying to not send naughty notes ..... in order to be a lady.
carmen_b
09-26-2019, 08:48 PM
Then minutes later I said I *could* shower , put on lingerie, and have him come over so I can ride his face.
Why not just throw it out there right ? ;)
UPDATE : fail .... see random thread
I hate that feeling ...... like I'm the ONLY one that thinks it would be fun to just meet NOW . Whatever . ;/
It does make me 2nd guess everything though.
I mean .... if it's not sexy and fun and playful ......... what is it ?
charlie61
09-27-2019, 10:26 PM
How are you finding all of these dudes with low sex drives...? I don't understand!
carmen_b
09-28-2019, 01:47 PM
He redeeemed himself. Came the next day and took care of me.
To be fair we did have sex Sunday and I was trying to lure him Thursday.
He was over here Friday folding me like a pretzel and making it right.
I stood up for myself though . I told him I would *rarely* ask.
I felt it was the wrong choice to not come over.
He was worried about being too drunk to preform well .
He had promised his sister too he would take her kids to school.
^ I was pretty insistent that he should have just told her that was off this ONE time.
I will see how it plays out. I won’t tolerate a low drive.
carmen_b
09-30-2019, 03:00 PM
I am finally getting enough sex. We had a 48 hour date that started and ended with sex ( Fri and Sun ).
I think he knew he was on VERY thin ice Friday after not pouncing on my offer Thursday ( I'll admit it does still bother me ).
He admitted it was the wrong call.
carmen_b
10-02-2019, 01:40 PM
God, I'm a damn monster haha.
I would gladly pay someone to free up two hours of my time this evening in order to go fool around with the dude.
He hasn't ASKED so there is that .
I want my life to look like early Rome ...... just dining, frequent sex , bathing, lounging, and time spent outside. Lol.
Vyanka
10-03-2019, 02:34 PM
I have to drop the guy I'm with soon. I'm attracted to his face but the extra weight and other stuff bother me. He is fun to hang with bc we like the same things but he is fucking needy. Dude. If I can't hang every week don't whine about it. Maybe if I liked him 100% I wouldn't give a shit?? Lol. Ugh.
His mother called me his gf. Ugh. No. We never agreed to be exclusive yet. Way too soon and way too soon to have met her too!!
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:11 PM
^ You wouldn't even make time for him once a week ? Lol.
yeah, you didn't like him
Ugh , it's fucking hard sometimes to decide.
I am SO dying to see a photo of your dude because your description is so similar to mine ( he's hot but 35 pound or so I'd say too heavy ). I look at his old " Mountain Man " photos from Alaska and do feel frustrated sometimes. Maybe I'll PM you a pic of mine haha.
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:13 PM
I finally figured it the fuck out ! I just couldn't GET it ..... I had my work hours peak to 55 hours a week the last 4 weeks so I was SHORT on free time but I still had time for my dude a couple times a week.
NOW today ..... I think I finally got to the bottom of it . I am off on a work trip for three days starting tomorrow morning. He is hesitant to come over. It's alcohol I think. Not 100% sure but hints are leading there. He is 8 miles away but " stuck " in hesitation to come over ( it's been 4 days since I've seen him and if he doesn't today it'll be 7 days by the time I get back ). That's LAME considering how close we are. I don't think he is pulling any bullshit like having another partner ( he has put pictures of us on social media ).
I am too busy to deal with him today honestly. I will figure out what to do later. I guess getting a proper out of town send off ( getting fucked and then going to the airport sore ) is something that only I think of and he doesn't lol .
I'm 99% sure I have solved the mystery of where his time is going. It was a TOUGH mystery to crack. He has mentioned wanting to quit drinking but since I've never seen him drunk I didn't think it was an issue. I'd like to think maybe he could kick it but I am hesitant to deal with an addiction, even a common one. I am 100% not ok only seeing someone only once a week after two months ( he knows this ). I really liked our twice a week plan too. We made it together and it seemed great.
It's funny, I don't even really care that much. I don't even care if I switch to being just celibate. I want ALL my time . I won't online date again due to the time wasting element.
charlie61
10-03-2019, 08:17 PM
^I'm so perplexed by how many dudes like this are out there. Are they just intimidated by your sexual confidence? I feel like you're offering the fantasy to so many guys, and they're all... coming up short.
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:35 PM
Well ... like I admitted in the random thing ..... I am a bit of a pillow princess to be honest ........ BUT it doesn't usually bother anyone.
It seemed to just bother the last couple.
Both Kinkster J, Aussie B , and even Mr. Tall still keep in touch with me .
I guess it depends on the person.
I didn't dress up much with this dude either ( ever ) which probably wasn't fair now that I think about it. We were heavily absorbed in outdoor adventure though. I would pack a bag with things like a saw , an ax, food , water . Then throwing lingerie in didn't seem to fit and I'd forget ( I threw rubbers in obviously hahaha ).
charlie61
10-03-2019, 08:37 PM
Well ... like I admitted in the random thing ..... I am a bit of a pillow princess to be honest ........ BUT it doesn't usually bother anyone.
It seemed to just bother the last couple.
These boys need to learn how to WORK! Like, damn, i thought that was a fantasy for lots of dudes.
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:39 PM
Ok ........ I'll be honest too. Being " less than satisfied " led me reach out to J.
He reports that he is " single with a warm body and ready to serve ".
I know it was wrong to reach him. ;(
I didn't do anything with it .
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:41 PM
M seems to TOTALLY forget I have a fingering fetish even though I'm not shy about it .
Maybe I should pretend to not like sex or something. Being enthusiastic does seem to burn me.
I really don't want to stay in this situation but his birthday is next week. Ugh.
I don't really want to go over to his parents house though ( first time meeting them ) to attend this party for him either .
charlie61
10-03-2019, 08:44 PM
I'm in crisis because i've divorced my Hitachi (bye bye, crazy- intense solo orgasms) in order to open up the potential for partnered orgasms. But now that i've successfully had a partnered orgasm (which was good and satisfying in its novelty, but nowhere near as intense as Hitachi orgasms), i feel reliant on sex as an opportunity to get myself off - something i've never felt, since i've had my Hitachi for like over ten years. And both sex and partnered orgasms aren't always reliable. But i have to stay away from my Hitachi to keep the potential for partnered orgasms open. When I'm using my Hitachi (solo), any partnered sexual touch feels irritatingly underwhelming, whereas when I'm Hitachi-free, sexual touch feels better even when i don't come. But without my Hitachi, I'm missing out on reliable, crazy intense orgasms.
Argh! Crisis. Sorry for the TMI rant... lol
charlie61
10-03-2019, 08:49 PM
Like ..... last time for example ......... dude seems to TOTALLY forget I have a fingering fetish even though I'm not shy about it . WTF. I read this article where this other girl was reporting that she LITERALLY spells out exactly what to do to get her off and men don't do it . Lol . Stupid.
Maybe I should pretend to not like sex or something. Being just genuinely happy / enthusiastic does seem to burn me.
I really don't want to stay in this situation but his birthday is next week. Ugh.
I don't really want to go over to his parents house though ( first time meeting them ) to attend this party for him either though if I'm planning to leave.
Ridiculous! Ugh.
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 08:51 PM
Eh, fuck it. I just texted and said we should talk and consider separating.
I can't pretend I'm ok with how tonight played out.
It shows him that it's ok to not make time for me and I'll just be ok with a 7 day wait ?
I am seeing another personality trait in him too ( it just takes TIME for this stuff to creep up ). I think he is a bit of a sucker for drama and time wasting. I have seen a couple instances where he has let people waste his time . It's a separate issue obviously but he has a lack of respect for his own time .
Off to block him on all social media channels ( as a precaution if he really is drinking heavily today ).
charlie61
10-03-2019, 09:00 PM
^Yeah, as i get older, i find that listening to my gut sooner rather than later can save you sooooo much time, energy, drama, and heartache. There's some quote that's like, don't continue putting more time into making a mistake just because you've already been doing it for x amount of time...
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 09:04 PM
^ it's an investing term !
" Don't throw good money after bad " .
I remember feeling this urge to break it off 3-5 says ago even though it seemed like I was being treated really well ( overall ) but I was seeing things ...... him allowing his time to be wasted ........ " mysteries " of why he couldn't come over even though we live close.
carmen_b
10-03-2019, 09:18 PM
Fingers for solo time ? I've done that too ( taken a break from devices in order for more O's with a partner and it does work ).
Another option is a less intense toy ....
I'm in crisis because i've divorced my Hitachi (bye bye, crazy- intense solo orgasms) in order to open up the potential for partnered orgasms. But now that i've successfully had a partnered orgasm (which was good and satisfying in its novelty, but nowhere near as intense as Hitachi orgasms), i feel reliant on sex as an opportunity to get myself off - something i've never felt, since i've had my Hitachi for like over ten years. And both sex and partnered orgasms aren't always reliable. But i have to stay away from my Hitachi to keep the potential for partnered orgasms open. When I'm using my Hitachi (solo), any partnered sexual touch feels irritatingly underwhelming, whereas when I'm Hitachi-free, sexual touch feels better even when i don't come. But without my Hitachi, I'm missing out on reliable, crazy intense orgasms.
Argh! Crisis. Sorry for the TMI rant... lol
charlie61
10-03-2019, 10:15 PM
Fingers for solo time ? I've done that too ( taken a break from devices in order for more O's with a partner and it does work ).
Another option is a less intense toy ....
Yeah, fingers for solo time. But that still doesn't come close to Hitachi orgasms! Sigh.
AChildOfBoredom
10-04-2019, 01:28 AM
At least you get a moment’s peace for solo time. Being head of the madhouse here, I’m not so fortunate.
carmen_b
10-04-2019, 10:04 AM
What do I DO with him ?
He said he promises to make it up to me .
Im being picky ( have an issue with him waiting to see me until Sunday v.s. seeing me Thurs. before I left town ).
I can't decide what to do and am out of town now .......
We did talk via text and he does have a problem with me not being sexually generous enough ( suspected ).
It's embarrassing to admit but I didn't think he minded . I find it a *little* odd because he gets sex at the end of each encounter . I guess he wants more foreplay ?
Vyanka
10-04-2019, 04:56 PM
^ You wouldn't even make time for him once a week ? Lol.
yeah, you didn't like him
Ugh , it's fucking hard sometimes to decide.
I am SO dying to see a photo of your dude because your description is so similar to mine ( he's hot but 35 pound or so I'd say too heavy ). I look at his old " Mountain Man " photos from Alaska and do feel frustrated sometimes. Maybe I'll PM you a pic of mine haha.
Lol. I'll try to get a picture. Just picture a young 20 something Jason Mamoa but fair skin. And I'm obsessed with that actor. Lol.
But this guy lives 3 hours away and by the end of the week I'm beat and gotta catch up on stuff. Idk. I'm confused. I do enjoy my time with him though. More like a friend with a very cute face.
MissTay
10-04-2019, 05:26 PM
I've started to see this guy and he takes forever to cum! I know that's a good thing in most cases but he is packing! So as much as it's amazing most the time I actually get really worn out by the time he's cumming! I'm not as experienced as some of you all! I was with 1 guy before I split with my husband. A couple times I've actually told him I'll just finish him off with a blowjob but I feel like this isn't going to work long term if that's always what needs to be done.
carmen_b
10-04-2019, 06:29 PM
^ I don't like the forever guys ! haha.
I'm easy so it's hard if a guy takes a bit.
Vyanka: Oh, the distance does explain why it's only been a weekly-ish meeting.
carmen_b
10-04-2019, 06:32 PM
Meanwhile I'm here in Mr. Talls town ( I don't think he's here ) just sitting here dealing with these memories of the best pussy eating of my life.
#1 sexual regret of 2019 is not fucking him ........
don't mind me ..... lol
Whatever lucky lady pounced on him when he moved back East ...... we HATE her. Hahahaha.
carmen_b
10-04-2019, 06:45 PM
Damn my friend is a wise woman . She mentioned maybe I should just chill and see happens in 2 days.
I'm back in town in 48 hours.
If I were him, I'd get ON IT ........ dinner reservations ........ flowers ....... mindset to be dtf .