View Full Version : 2019 DATING Adventures Thread (2018 continuation)
carmen_b
12-01-2019, 06:32 PM
Mmmmm. The British accent is a *good* one isn't it ?
Not quite the panty dropper of the Australian accent ( at least for me hahahah ) but it is very very good.
carmen_b
12-01-2019, 06:37 PM
Omg. I am just having the weirdest weekend.
I'm trying to see Mr . " I own 40 houses " just to see if he really does look like the pictures / is not nuts / gather a little intel but I just can't get my shit together today. I am SO tired. I have retreated to go sit in front of this full spectrum bright like for 20-30 minutes . I really struggle in winter. Perhaps maybe not the wisest idea to date someone in a fancy ski area who will want a seamless blend into his life of course lol ( I can't ski worth a damn either but I champagne and hot tub like a pro ).
:(
carmen_b
12-01-2019, 07:39 PM
I saw the Aviator again on Tinder. This time he shaved a year off his age ( he says he is 34 now ). He has only 1 photo with shades on.
And a fake name. NO profile info.
He is obviously prob a little nuts. I can't help but feeling like my little screening process ( maybe he saw me on FB as a suggestion ?) helped spur this vague profile on .
He is prob crazy but I would totally fuck him. At least I didn't get pissed this time. It was more amusement and a " yeah , he's hot AF ".
miss.a.p1600
12-01-2019, 07:52 PM
Omg that gave me a chuckle. If crazy women have good pussy then crazy men have good dick?
carmen_b
12-01-2019, 10:42 PM
^ It's not the crazy that makes me want to fuck him hahaha it's just his looks ( 6'4" or so ). He said 6'5" in Tinder before. Maybe he is 6'5" , not totally sure.
1/4 inch beard ( dark brown hair ). So handsome. Blue eyes.
Anyway ..... bleh. I remember seeing him on Tinder about 5 weeks ago when I picked it up a bit as M was pulling his bull shit and reaching out via text . He didn't answer my invite for a drink via text so I had to let it go.
I honestly sometimes catch myself starting to write something dirty to send over when I have a buzz on and I'm just so firm with myself. NO .... you are NOT sending this hahaha.
I sometimes wonder if he might be married. I know his name / the ex's name. There is an overlap in address there and I'm not 100% sure separation is fully there . She has his last name still.
There is this blurb in there ( I had sent a mountain picture from Glacier National Park in Montana ) and his reply was :
" yeah , I'm Jerking "
" I mean JEALOUS lol "
^ It was an auto correct fail and I still regret not telling him that if that was the case, I would send A LOT MORE mountain photos .
I was driving at the time and only hit the " ha ha " button.
miss.a.p1600
12-01-2019, 11:18 PM
Winter is “cuffing” season.
It’s cold, people are indoors more, and they want somebody to lay up with. It’s hard for men to be chasing poon poon in winter so they’d rather lock down some reliable pussy
And wouldn’t the crazy cancel out the good looks? I’m just imagining some guy going into full exorcist mode mid dick ride
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 07:36 AM
Omg Carmen b
You said something that seriously stuck out in my mind this am.
My crazy ass (yes I feel crazy because I keep thinking about and posting about this guy) woke up wanting him to call me and text me today. Even though after Carmen E described what she thought was going on I should want to eliminate him but maybe I’m a glutton for punishment or something or I just got addicted to the male attention/male touch that I’ve been missing for YEARS
Forgive me if I sound foolish
Then I thought about how you said he probably thinks I’m married after I said I’m not alone yet and I ignored those late night calls. And I was like I told his ass I was single so wtf why would he think I’m married? ...... when he met me in the grocery store I was wearing a diamond ring on my ring finger. I explained it was NOT a wedding ring and just a strategy I used when I went into married couples homes especially so wives wouldn’t get jealous or or men wouldn’t try anything.
My dumb ass forgot to take it off. And so maybe he thought I was lying or something and really married
I suppose this explains things better. If I’m allegedly married in his mind then I should be DTF since I gave him my number and allowed him to pursue me.
Welp! When pretending to be married goes all wrong LOL!
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 07:49 AM
I feel addicted to a drug rn ...... and I ain’t even had the drugs yet
Tf?!?!
I probably should just walk away from it all
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 08:02 AM
Omg he just text me! I need dicks anonymous rehab
seashell
12-02-2019, 09:31 AM
I would totally fail at dicks anonymous rehabilitation XD
"They tried to make me go to rehab and I said no, no, no"
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 09:37 AM
^ Same. I went dry for two months ( my own rehab ! ) and am so so so so so OVER it !!
It will actually be two months in two days lol but who is counting ?
YEAH, Miss P., you might be onto something! Just maybe give him reassurance you are single. If you trust him you can even have him pick you up for the next date ? I mean .... when you think about it .... so many people lie. I mean .... just flat out lie. So those of us who PREFER honesty / clarity are always looking for these little clues you know ?
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 09:39 AM
It's ON for tomorrow with Mr. Real Estate.
I have to admit ..... he annoyed me at first ( I have that really strong preference for the quick face to face meeting v.s. extensive texting ) but I noticed yesterday we texted a little and I did enjoy talking to him. We have also talked on the phone a couple times.
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 09:43 AM
I CAN NOT believe my father would defend M !!
Omg.
We had lunch yesterday and I told him I wasn't seeing M anymore and wasn't inviting him to a family event today ( due to him not initiating in Oct. , then being forgiven late Oct., then not initiating AGAIN in November other than helping me move ). I can't believe my Dad would defend him ! His Alaskan Mountain Man persona just seems to nab everyone including my dad I guess ! Ugh. ;(
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 09:50 AM
The aviator just reached me !!!
I want to fuck him so bad. I don't care if he is nuts. Should I ? !
He reached me via Tinder. I must have swiped right on him but had a buzz on and don't even remember doing that.
He asked if I want to get together.
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 10:02 AM
^^^fuck that crazy out of him lol!
Wait! Are we talking stage 5 crazy or mild crazy?
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 10:08 AM
^ He seemed really really normal when we met honestly. Nice person.
This is the one who wanted our 2nd date in the day time . I've got to chat with him and make sure he is really divorced or that they are really open. There are just signs that he taken . The ex wife seems to still have his last name . The day time date suggestions.NO tan line on hand though. I always check. I need more info for sure.
Having some attention on the horizon is making me not hate my home city as much hahahah.
Mr. Real Estate is already on calendar for Tues. Offer aviator Wed. ?
At some point if I'm living in the USA still ( I was supposed to get on a plane somewhere cheaper in 3-5 days ) ..... I need to get back to the damn club and earn too. I feel like I should treat myself though. I didn't chase dudes at all for two months !
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 12:35 PM
I can’t answer the aviator right away.
He can’t know he’s got me haha.
Gotta let the message sit 12-16 hours or so.
AChildOfBoredom
12-02-2019, 02:25 PM
I fly home in two days and this guy’s asking me out on a date. As if I’m not supposed to be able to read right through that.
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 05:58 PM
I can’t answer the aviator right away.
He can’t know he’s got me haha.
Gotta let the message sit 12-16 hours or so.
Damn half a day?!?
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 11:16 PM
^ yup, I saw the message this morning at 9a.m. or so.
Maybe I'll answer it now ( 11:20 p.m. ) or maybe wait till morning.
I just can't let him entirely have an upper hand. ;/
He sent it on Tinder also ..... but he has my cell . ?
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 11:56 PM
( delete )
miss.a.p1600
12-03-2019, 07:29 AM
^ yup, I saw the message this morning at 9a.m. or so.
Maybe I'll answer it now ( 11:20 p.m. ) or maybe wait till morning.
I just can't let him entirely have an upper hand. ;/
He sent it on Tinder also ..... but he has my cell . ?
I'm a little scared to do anything. I was OBSESSED with the Aviator back in Aug.
BUT .... it was only one date and some texting and calls so I can't really expect too much you know?
I started seeing M shortly after .
It kind of shows the weirdness of online dating a bit.
Thoughts?
Looking through our texts ... so much fun communication July 29 - Aug. 20
Then .... poof he was gone. ;/
I reached him weekly for 3-4 weeks after and then again late Oct. ;(
My thoughts??? ...... he gone have to eat a LOT of pussy to make you forget about his disappearing act
miss.a.p1600
12-03-2019, 07:31 AM
Hmmm.
Going to wait until tomorrow to even reply if I do.... it's a little to think about.
I won't accept a day time date either hahaha. I looked back through our texts and see I was so clearly trying to transition this Tues. day time date suggestion he had to an evening. hahah
https://www.glamour.com/story/guy-stopped-calling-texts-again
Daytime?
I actually want to see the dude I’m dating in the daytime one of these days soon
Oh nvmd I see what you mean. And yeah a guy trying to meet you on Weekday during the day could be a red flag he’s reserved his prime real estate frid and sat evenings for other women.
Tuesday during the day only if day he worked weekends and he had something like family emergency that night.
carmen_b
12-03-2019, 08:56 AM
Yes!!!!!
My thoughts??? ...... he gone have to eat a LOT of pussy to make you forget about his disappearing act
carmen_b
12-03-2019, 08:59 AM
Yes, to me the day time suggestion was a red flag ( which I'll discuss with him first before meeting ).
It seems that he is either married OR that I didn't make the " evening hours " cut at that time ( last Aug ).
I can see in my texts that he suggested that day time date and then I suggested the next day ( evening ). I was trying to steer things an evening direction. Then ..... he vanished. ;/
I'm still just hesitant in a way to "burn" any time . I mean .... I can dedicate my evening hours to the club Wed. / Thurs. / Fri. this week and I will most likely see a good return for that time !! I have already given my rsvp to Mr. Ski Area Real Estate ( M ) for tonight.
Daytime?
I actually want to see the dude I’m dating in the daytime one of these days soon
Oh nvmd I see what you mean. And yeah a guy trying to meet you on Weekday during the day could be a red flag he’s reserved his prime real estate frid and sat evenings for other women.
Tuesday during the day only if day he worked weekends and he had something like family emergency that night.
carmen_b
12-03-2019, 09:19 AM
I feel like this article has some good advice :
https://www.glamour.com/story/is-he-really-interested-into-you
carmen_b
12-03-2019, 09:27 AM
I'm nervous for this date tonight. He is willing to meet me early ( my preference ) at 5:30 so I see it as a great sign.
Plus he is coming down from the mountain so I don't have to drive out of town ( good sign #2 ).
The bad sign is that I have my time preferred and area of town ....... I am not going to suggest the actual place. He will have to.
UPDATE : place suggested. We are good to go !
carmen_b
12-05-2019, 03:12 PM
Got on with the Real Estate guy VERY VERY well. ;)
I'm going to try to be a lady and keep some deets close. Hahahaha .
We will see if that changes if I get a buzz on at some point today.
miss.a.p1600
12-05-2019, 03:35 PM
^ Well ... he did ask out twice already right ?
Not sure if my advice is great but a simple suggestion of Sun. coffee or brunch might be ok.
It’s only the start. Meeting weekly is pretty standard the first few weeks.
I'm 100% not saying that you need to step in and initiate. Just maybe a small hint or something that a Sunday meeting would be nice.
How would one go about asking this?
Sorry I usually to go places and then be like “oh you should totally be here....” but I get that’s like super last minute so I don’t know what to say exactly
seashell
12-05-2019, 03:37 PM
Fuuuck. I'm so annoyed at R. We had a really great night, went out for a very fancy dinner at a place that he chose, then walked around the city, and kissed for the first time at the lake. He was super sweet, and I'm pretty convinced that he's a straight-edged, vanilla guy, for the most part. I like that. I love nerds and slightly awkward sweet guys.
But then he kept insisting on coming back to my place. I mean, I get it, he's a 30 year old guy. But like... can't anyone just chill for the first few dates? Show that you give a shit about me and take it slow? I miss America. I am so fucking sick of these European douchebags. At least in your own culture and language, it's easier to figure out a guy's intentions.
I'm going to just straight-up ask him if he's looking for a girl to hook up with, or to actually date. I'm OK with casual relationships. But I don't want to play that game of "Does he like me?" Make up your mind. I'm really bummed, I had decided that I liked this one.
carmen_b
12-05-2019, 03:38 PM
" I was thinking about doing brunch at xyz Sunday. Would you like to join me ? "
How would one go about asking this?
Sorry I usually to go places and then be like “oh you should totally be here....” but I get that’s like super last minute so I don’t know what to say exactly
miss.a.p1600
12-05-2019, 03:39 PM
^oh! Lol! That sounds easy
seashell
12-05-2019, 03:39 PM
Also, really wishing I hadn't posted an obvious Instagram story of our date night out. LOL. Two glasses of wine, and I got a little too generous with social media. Hoping I didn't scare away the cute British guy.
carmen_b
12-05-2019, 03:39 PM
Nothing wrong with getting that clarity. I find it helpful too. I only want to date leading to LTR so even thought it's forward I like to get the intention thing out of the way.
Basically .... there is so much still left to see if there are common threads on. You don't want to fight someone as simple as the " what are you looking for intention ".
Fuuuck. I'm so annoyed at R. We had a really great night, went out for a very fancy dinner at a place that he chose, then walked around the city, and kissed for the first time at the lake. He was super sweet, and I'm pretty convinced that he's a straight-edged, vanilla guy, for the most part. I like that. I love nerds and slightly awkward sweet guys.
But then he kept insisting on coming back to my place. I mean, I get it, he's a 30 year old guy. But like... can't anyone just chill for the first few dates? Show that you give a shit about me and take it slow? I miss America. I am so fucking sick of these European douchebags. At least in your own culture and language, it's easier to figure out a guy's intentions.
I'm going to just straight-up ask him if he's looking for a girl to hook up with, or to actually date. I'm OK with casual relationships. But I don't want to play that game of "Does he like me?" Make up your mind. I'm really bummed, I had decided that I liked this one.
miss.a.p1600
12-05-2019, 03:41 PM
Fuuuck. I'm so annoyed at R. We had a really great night, went out for a very fancy dinner at a place that he chose, then walked around the city, and kissed for the first time at the lake. He was super sweet, and I'm pretty convinced that he's a straight-edged, vanilla guy, for the most part. I like that. I love nerds and slightly awkward sweet guys.
But then he kept insisting on coming back to my place. I mean, I get it, he's a 30 year old guy. But like... can't anyone just chill for the first few dates? Show that you give a shit about me and take it slow? I miss America. I am so fucking sick of these European douchebags. At least in your own culture and language, it's easier to figure out a guy's intentions.
I'm going to just straight-up ask him if he's looking for a girl to hook up with, or to actually date. I'm OK with casual relationships. But I don't want to play that game of "Does he like me?" Make up your mind. I'm really bummed, I had decided that I liked this one.
No they can’t.
Male dating coaches are teaching them that if they don’t fuck by second date then the women is not interested and sees him as a “beta” male.
Third date and definitely 90 days is out the window for a lot of these guys.
Also if you ask them what they are looking for they may still conceal their intentions (and say some vague generic line “I’m open to relationship”) but what they leave out is timeframe and whether or not that’s with YOU. They don’t want to ruin their chances of getting pussy.
*but by all means ask; some guys will be 100% straightforward and say what their intentions are even if it means risking you walking away because you don’t have the same intent
seashell
12-06-2019, 05:01 AM
^^You ladies are so wise! <3
Ok, I asked him what his intentions are, and he said he's looking for someone to date, he wants a relationship eventually, and he really likes me.
I don't know if we're just having a lot of language barriers, or my crazy trust issues are creating problems, or what, lol. His actions have been really sweet and caring, so I guess I’ll go with that. I told him I liked him, too, and that we’d hang out again soon.
Interestingly, I have to say I’ve had really good luck with guys being very nice, caring, and generous, when I bring up the fact that I don’t trust them yet. They don’t want to seem like a bad guy, so they go out of their way to prove themselves (even if they really are just a fuckboy in the end). Maybe a hustle tactic to lean into. ;)
lurkingtitties
12-06-2019, 07:36 AM
No they can’t.
Male dating coaches are teaching them that if they don’t fuck by second date then the women is not interested and sees him as a “beta” male.
Third date and definitely 90 days is out the window for a lot of these guys.
Also if you ask them what they are looking for they may still conceal their intentions (and say some vague generic line “I’m open to relationship”) but what they leave out is timeframe and whether or not that’s with YOU. They don’t want to ruin their chances of getting pussy.
*but by all means ask; some guys will be 100% straightforward and say what their intentions are even if it means risking you walking away because you don’t have the same intent
Ok I agree with this up to a point and it’s good to not be naive about the dating pool these days. But at the same time this ^^^ and a lot of other stuff I see on here about dating and relationships is jaded AF. Our thoughts are powerful and if all you (not you specifically, miss.a.p., the General you) tell yourself is that men are trash, that’s all you will encounter. It’s something I’ve been wanting to point out here for a while.
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 08:04 AM
Thanks for your input lurking t
I actually need to hear that. I do believe in law of attraction And I am not trying to imply all guys are trash.
I just came off a binge of that “alpha male strategies” guys YouTube videos so it is easy to get cynical watching dudes like him give men advice .... but he does say his channel is for men who are NOT looking for relationships only to keep women around for sex or whatever. I figured if I watch it I’d get a better idea of guys who are not look for relationships so I can avoid those guys.
The only trash ones are they ones who straight up lie or string women along for their own gain.
If I had to estimate I’d say 25% of guys are relationship minded then narrow that down to find the one who is a good fit
lurkingtitties
12-06-2019, 03:43 PM
I'm glad you liked my input! It's something that I've learned for myself recently so I totally get having a hard time with it.
Sometime last spring I remember a discussion happening on here about online dating. One of the members (Can't remember who) wrote a post about how she was on Tinder for a while before ultimately finding a boyfriend offline. She met some interesting guys who treated her well even though none of them panned out into a serious relationship for various reasons. The part that really jumped out at me about the post was that she said she approached it with a positive LOA mindset, that there were lots of cool guys on the app interested in connecting with her. At the time I was just beginning to climb out of a dark place myself, and I believed her but also couldn't fathom it being true for me too. Since then I've come a long way and my mindset is different. I agree with her statement because I feel good about myself. Men have been treating me differently as well since I've improved my mindset. (Still no BF yet, but I know it will happen!)
There's a LOA motivational speaker I've listened to a lot this fall after someone mentioned him in the LOA thread in Hustle Hut. Neville Goddard. One of the things he talks about is having a "mental diet" of only positive content in order to keep your vibration high so you can manifest your desires. He was an old-school guy so he was more talking about newspapers back in like the 50s, but it very much applies to social media these days. I'd say falling down a rabbit hole of a pickup artist's YouTube channel and then subsequently having self-limiting attitudes about dating is a shining example of how it works!
seashell
12-06-2019, 05:05 PM
^That is super true. I think mindset is everything, when it comes to seeking higher quality partners. The types of people that are attracted to you, the way you "permit" them to treat you... It all improves when your mindset improves.
I hung out with R again, today. He was near my place for work, so we went out for a coffee, and he walked my dogs with me. He is such a gentleman... I really don’t know what to make of him. I need to find out why his past relationships didn’t work out, lol. The only problem is... he’s super conservative... I don’t know if I would have any chance with him, if I told him about my past in sex work. He was open minded about my current job as a Tarot reader, though... :)
Also, I think I'm over the British guy. Talked to him at length, today. The first thing he did was complain about his job and his financial situation... I dunno, I get really annoyed by guys who are too negative. I need to be with someone who has a positive outlook on the world.
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 06:02 PM
So my recent experience with my sole dating partner has caused me to lose interest. I realize that him just leaving a long term relationship is not a good look for me to continue with him right now and I feel the need to pull back because I don’t do friends nor free attention
If he text me or call me should I just take a long time to respond or not respond at all? Or should I just tell him the truth?
Or am I thinking too much into this?
I’m trying to be mature but......
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 06:52 PM
I want to actually complete my own operations... geez!!!
JGB2009
12-06-2019, 08:46 PM
So my recent experience with my sole dating partner has caused me to lose interest. I realize that him just leaving a long term relationship is not a good look for me to continue with him right now and I feel the need to pull back because I don’t do friends nor free attention
If he text me or call me should I just take a long time to respond or not respond at all? Or should I just tell him the truth?
Or am I thinking too much into this?
I’m trying to be mature but......
I have no advice but I'm laughing cause you think just like me. Hope u figure it out though. Good luck.
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 08:52 PM
^yeah you know what
Fuck him!!!!! (And not in the good way)
I know I say this every time but I’m dead ass serious this time
And naw I ain’t trying to be mature cause mfs can’t handle maturity they want someone to give them pain and keep them guessing. So guess what? I’ll be THAT bitch today
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 10:40 AM
Sex a couples times a day for 3 days. Sore AF.
I’m not sure I can keep up . Seems I have the opposite of my usual problem now.
:/
I hope he will compromise with once a day while I recover.
Not sure where things will go but I have really enjoyed the week.
Oddly ... I sort of knew he would do this ( kind of want me completely absorbed into his life ). It’s probably a huge red flag but I enjoyed the last few days. I need to give him *some* time to miss me though . :/
My day job is remote ( I work from a computer ) so he kind of expected me to just work from the house but I prefer coworking spaces or coffee shops . So we are having these little push back situations.
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 10:58 AM
Is anyone curious about the next crazy level from the Aviator ?
.... can’t see him now and persue that as things are a monogamous direction with new M / Mr. Real Estate / Skier..... but got the crazy confirmation !
lurkingtitties
12-07-2019, 03:11 PM
Yes, definitely tell us what the Aviator did and congrats on the sex
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 04:11 PM
I said I might be open to meeting and asked what he was thinking.
He said a " movie and possibly make out " . I joked to him about his fake name and he is like " Yeah, my full name is M.B.L "
However, it is NOT lol which I know 100% from my screening! This stupid idiot thinks I am not smart enough to get an I.D. on him from his own damn website, linked in, and FB . He is lying about his full name entirely and completely willing to WASTE MY TIME. Most likely married. I kind of want to confront him and let him know how much I USED TO like him !
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 04:38 PM
^probably so.
The guy who gave me THE best oral sex of my life told me his name was MJ.
Most likely a fake name, attached to a crazy dude (yes he went crazy after I refused to fuck him), etc.
I’m
Just glad he wasn’t rapist or serial killer crazy cause how the hell would I report someone named with 2 letters only
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 04:40 PM
^ These morons think women are not smart enough to use Tech / see their real info. Honestly. It just irks me that the Aviator was / is willing to burn my time and energy. He maybe had some guilt over it ( could explain the disappearance in August ). I just liked him SOOOOOOO much. ;(