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slowpoke
07-01-2021, 10:42 AM
Jesus frequently appears on tortillas.


https://www.google.com/search?q=jesus%2Btortilla&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiS8fv_tcLxAhV-k2oFHUkRDdgQ_AUoAXoECAEQAw&biw=1280&bih=597

Luci Fer
07-01-2021, 06:20 PM
I don’t remember when this was, except I was quite young when the story broke… a woman had made a grilled cheese sandwich and thought she saw the Virgin Mary grilled into the bread. So, she held onto that grilled cheese sandwich for a really long time (I believe ten years), then put it up on EBay for I believe $10,000. So, you know, if you ever see the Virgin Mary in your stool…

HAHAHAHAHA! Don't tempt me.

Luci Fer
07-01-2021, 06:24 PM
Jesus frequently appears on tortillas.


https://www.google.com/search?q=jesus%2Btortilla&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiS8fv_tcLxAhV-k2oFHUkRDdgQ_AUoAXoECAEQAw&biw=1280&bih=597

It probably shows that the Lord is closer to us, closer than we think. It's literally in everything. We eat it and we shit it. That's what they mean when they say 'jesus lives in you'?/:O

WendiStarr
07-02-2021, 12:37 PM
[QUOTE=Aurora_Sunset;3234198]55409


Oh gosh! That reminds me of the time I worked a part time vanilla job at Target. I had to clean the bathrooms and I wondered how some people managed to shit all over the toilet and floor. Did they just stand there, spraying shit? This was in both the women's and men's bathrooms. I finally had enough and quit that job on a day when I went to work and first sight of the day was shit all over a toilet, shit smeared on the stall door and walls and a messy turd right on the floor next to the toilet. I guess some people have creative shitting positions in public bathrooms.

TheBrownFox
07-02-2021, 01:05 PM
Oh gosh! That reminds me of the time I worked a part time vanilla job at Target. I had to clean the bathrooms and I wondered how some people managed to shit all over the toilet and floor. Did they just stand there, spraying shit? This was in both the women's and men's bathrooms. I finally had enough and quit that job on a day when I went to work and first sight of the day was shit all over a toilet, shit smeared on the stall door and walls and a messy turd right on the floor next to the toilet. I guess some people have creative shitting positions in public bathrooms.


Ewww! When I had that temporary job in 2019 remodeling/stocking JoAnn Fabric and Craft store, I was highly annoyed when they sprung it on us that we all had to take turns cleaning and mopping the mens' and womens' bathrooms. We all had to do it, however me and a coworker friend of mine only did the womens' bathrooms and let someone else do the mens' bathrooms, because they were still allowing men to just walk in and use the bathroom while the woman (cleaning it) is in there alone. Sorry, I'm not gonna be left alone in a mens' bathroom (with the door closed) with one of those contractor guys who's always oogling female employees...while the dude's got his pants down...

whirlerz
07-02-2021, 01:30 PM
Ew^

At my storage, they let men & women use the same bathroom, even though there's 2 bathrooms, so I always am careful going in there.:yuck::yikes:

charlie61
07-02-2021, 06:06 PM
It's the worst when you're 100% sure that you're experiencing a nice, big, successful, easy poo, and then you look down and it was like... hardly anything. Just me?

indiegirl
07-02-2021, 06:23 PM
Sometimes I feel like I'm birthing out of my ass with a "wide load" and have to play calming music on my cellphone and close my eyes to ride through the pain of "delivering" on the toilet. LOLL. Those are the ones that leave me sore.

WendiStarr
07-02-2021, 08:15 PM
^ I hate to tell you this but that's exactly what birth feels like. I've had natural childbirth before(not by choice, baby came out fast) and it felt like I had to take a shit. When I was pushing baby out it felt like my ass and vag had become one. It was like I was taking the world's biggest shit.

indiegirl
07-02-2021, 08:26 PM
^ I hate to tell you this but that's exactly what birth feels like. I've had natural childbirth before(not by choice, baby came out fast) and it felt like I had to take a shit. When I was pushing baby out it felt like my ass and vag had become one. It was like I was taking the world's biggest shit.

That sounds awful :(. I've been watching videos and someone said their C-section was less painful than vaginal birth?

miss.a.p1600
07-02-2021, 08:40 PM
^ I hate to tell you this but that's exactly what birth feels like. I've had natural childbirth before(not by choice, baby came out fast) and it felt like I had to take a shit. When I was pushing baby out it felt like my ass and vag had become one. It was like I was taking the world's biggest shit.

This is exactly what my friend said

When we were teens (she had her first kid at 16) I asked her what it felt like.

Bruh said 'it feels like taking a shit'

TheBrownFox
07-02-2021, 09:03 PM
^ I hate to tell you this but that's exactly what birth feels like. I've had natural childbirth before(not by choice, baby came out fast) and it felt like I had to take a shit. When I was pushing baby out it felt like my ass and vag had become one. It was like I was taking the world's biggest shit.


I had a baby in 2003, and yes, that is what it feels like!

miss.a.p1600
07-03-2021, 06:41 AM
^im still a little confused though

Do you actually have shit coming out at the same time the baby is coming out????

WendiStarr
07-03-2021, 07:03 AM
I did with my first. The medical staff don't even say anything. They just clean it up and clean the baby up.

WendiStarr
07-03-2021, 07:09 AM
That sounds awful :(. I've been watching videos and someone said their C-section was less painful than vaginal birth?

I've never had a C-section so I can't say. I know induced birth last year somehow hurt worse than the natural birth in 2009. I'm a wimp with any pain in the abdominal region though. I used to faint over period cramps every month for years and constipation.

JenniferNorth
07-03-2021, 08:08 AM
^im still a little confused though

Do you actually have shit coming out at the same time the baby is coming out????

Yes, my oldest had a piece of poop on her head.

Nothing with the second daughter so it doesn't happen all the time.

JenniferNorth
07-03-2021, 08:09 AM
Speaking of shits, I took a monster shit this morning where I was praying to Jesus. I am not even religious!! But still I was like "God, please help me here!"

LoveyD
07-03-2021, 09:43 AM
I couldn't imagine giving birth without the epidural. You gals who did are warriors! I couldn't feel anything but pressure. Like I had to poop but it was coming out of my vagina. I didn't poop on kiddo, though.

LoveyD
07-03-2021, 09:44 AM
Ever take a full-on rainbow shit? Like it's green, orange, brown...

Emanuelle
07-03-2021, 10:00 AM
I check in the the What's New tab every now and then and I can't believe how long this thread has been going strong. lol

miss.a.p1600
07-03-2021, 01:15 PM
Yo!

Wtf

I’m more confused than ever now.

I thought they’d help you shave your cooch n like clean your colon

charlie61
07-03-2021, 01:30 PM
Yo!

Wtf

I’m more confused than ever now.

I thought they’d help you shave your cooch n like clean your colon

Yeah, it's the one thing no one ever talks about when it comes to giving birth - pretty much everyone shits a little. I've heard that medical staff is great about cleaning it up super quickly and discretely. But there's no way to stop it... you're pushing in that area with so much force.

indiegirl
07-03-2021, 01:36 PM
Yo!

Wtf

I’m more confused than ever now.

I thought they’d help you shave your cooch n like clean your colon

I'd imagine myself farting up a storm with a doctors face right near my booty. I'd rather try a c-section out instead of vaginal.

Super random, one thing that bugs me are public businesses not allowing you to use the restroom unless you pay for food. I don't understand it. I was in such an emergency once and wound up peeing outside their business (thank god it was dark out) because they refused to let me use their restroom. There was no way I was gonna make it home in time to use the bathroom.

indiegirl
07-03-2021, 01:42 PM
Ever take a full-on rainbow shit? Like it's green, orange, brown...

I've had a green and red one once based on eating beets and veggies. Basically it was a Christmas colored festive shit. I thought I was dying and had to google diagnose myself LOLLLL.

AChildOfBoredom
07-03-2021, 03:04 PM
^im still a little confused though

Do you actually have shit coming out at the same time the baby is coming out????

Not quite a rainbow, but I let off with some pretty strange colors when I was in Afghanistan. Mostly shades of green.

miss.a.p1600
07-03-2021, 03:20 PM
I'd imagine myself farting up a storm with a doctors face right near my booty. I'd rather try a c-section out instead of vaginal.

Super random, one thing that bugs me are public businesses not allowing you to use the restroom unless you pay for food. I don't understand it. I was in such an emergency once and wound up peeing outside their business (thank god it was dark out) because they refused to let me use their restroom. There was no way I was gonna make it home in time to use the bathroom.

Yeah I’m kind of vain I guess I’d rather just have my stomach cut open if I’m going to be shitting n bleeding n have my coochie left all hairy n stretched out.

I really thought giving birth was pretty n clean

Cant you just take a shit before you give birth? Like after your water breaks? But before the pain gets too bad?

Sorry if my mind sounds simplistic here. Just a little mind boggling.

indiegirl
07-03-2021, 03:57 PM
Yeah I’m kind of vain I guess I’d rather just have my stomach cut open if I’m going to be shitting n bleeding n have my coochie left all hairy n stretched out.

I really thought giving birth was pretty n clean

Cant you just take a shit before you give birth? Like after your water breaks? But before the pain gets too bad?

Sorry if my mind sounds simplistic here. Just a little mind boggling.

I've been watching youtube videos and I'm also learning about tearing from pushing too hard during birth and some people can tear all the way towards their butt. (Sounds so painful!) It's like "what's the point of a vaginal birth if I'm potentially going to have a 2nd-3rd degree tear where my vagina needs to be sewed up?"

TheBrownFox
07-03-2021, 05:15 PM
^im still a little confused though

Do you actually have shit coming out at the same time the baby is coming out????

No, I didn’t actually have shit coming out. But everyone is gonna have different childbirth experiences.

miss.a.p1600
07-03-2021, 05:35 PM
I've been watching youtube videos and I'm also learning about tearing from pushing too hard during birth and some people can tear all the way towards their butt. (Sounds so painful!) It's like "what's the point of a vaginal birth if I'm potentially going to have a 2nd-3rd degree tear where my vagina needs to be sewed up?"

Yeah one of my relatives said her kid tore her from her pussy to her asshole

Then she said she was horrified when the doctor stitched her up and told her husband “this extra stitch is for you *wink*”

LoveyD
07-03-2021, 07:43 PM
^^I remember they gave me an episiotomy so I wouldn't tear. I don't recall shitting though. My vagina hurt so bad following the birth. I felt like I had been hit by a truck.

miss.a.p1600
07-03-2021, 09:21 PM
Cotdamn!!! It felt like being hit in the vagina?!?

LoveyD
07-03-2021, 10:43 PM
^^^ I felt like I had been hit by a truck in the sense that I was sore all over from all the pushing I did. And yes, my vagina hurt too because I had stitches. The days after giving birth are not fun! I can see why women have PPD. I cried it out at the hospital, but once kiddo and I went home and got into a routine, things were much better. I healed pretty fast, too. Thankfully he was a super sweet and easy baby.

If I pooped during labor, nobody said anything.

LoveyD
07-03-2021, 11:46 PM
The CDC recommends that everyone with diharrea stay out of pools. No swimming for you diharrea people!

JenniferNorth
07-04-2021, 09:54 AM
Cotdamn!!! It felt like being hit in the vagina?!?

Girl, my youngest gave me a prolapsed cervix! Like I had physical therapy for my downstairs afterwards, but in the days after coming home, you could see my cervix just hanging out. It was NOT fun. It's still not 100% back to normal, but it is much better and does not show anymore. I notice the slight difference though.


HAHAHA the CDC has to tell people with explosive poop to stay out of the pool? They don't know enough not to?!! Loooooool!

LoveyD
07-04-2021, 10:08 AM
Omg you poor thing! I had no idea such a thing could happen! I'm glad things are better now, but holy crap! That is scary!

Yes, the CDC said to stay out of the pool or your diharrea issue can spread to others lol!

When I drink carrot juice my poop turns orange.

charlie61
07-04-2021, 07:45 PM
Yeah, medical staff don't tell the mothers that they shit during birth, of course. That'd be pretty rude and inconsiderate! That's why it's such a well-kept secret. They handle it very discretely.

LoveyD
07-05-2021, 10:43 AM
Medical staff know better than to do that, otherwise they'll hear an earful of bitching from the mother.

JenniferNorth
07-05-2021, 02:29 PM
This poop thread turned into a childbirth thread! LOL!

I'm still having bad shits in the AM. Now I have stomach cramps and I can just feel my period announcing it is here....

LoveyD
07-05-2021, 09:20 PM
Prune juice and apples will help you poo.

miss.a.p1600
07-06-2021, 08:32 AM
Just dropped the browns off at the Super Bowl

indiegirl
07-06-2021, 08:36 AM
I kinda was rushing to be on time for my 2nd appointment and flooded my hotel room with the strong odor of poop instead of using my air freshener to clear the air. I'm sure it was noticed when he walked in. LOLLLL

Also I have a specific bathroom in my house I only use to poop in and end up running to it if I have "the runs" even though there's a bathroom right next to my room. Sometimes if it is a "vocal" poop I'll turn the water on to not disturb my roommates.

indiegirl
07-06-2021, 10:41 AM
Also I've been spritzing essences of eau du fart in my hotel room before appointments. I must be in digestive crisis. I just sprayed the room to cover my farts but I gotta start holding them in for my last appt for this morning.

Aurora_Sunset
07-06-2021, 01:45 PM
The CDC recommends that everyone with diharrea stay out of pools. No swimming for you diharrea people!

I once almost gave myself diarrhea in a pool.

Years and years ago, when I was very young and stupid, I was playing in a pool that had jets. I was chilling with my butt up against a jet, because hey, why not - tinglies, right? And suddenly... had to SHIT MY BRAINS OUT. I barely made the run to the bathroom with my buttcheeks clenched.

My dumbass realized I basically gave myself an enema.

So, there's a fun story for ya'll. Keep your buttholes away from pool jets.

LoveyD
07-06-2021, 04:53 PM
Omg I'm dying!^^ you poor girl.

neverendingkneebruises
07-07-2021, 05:57 AM
https://i.redd.it/a5ni73xcmo971.jpg

Too relatable......

indiegirl
07-07-2021, 12:28 PM
https://i.makeagif.com/media/7-07-2021/XAD_kP.gif (/gif/stripper-farts-in-movie-on-make-a-gif-XAD_kP)
What every dancer wants to happen with non-tippers

JenniferNorth
07-07-2021, 04:06 PM
I had Dominos. You know it's gonna be the painful pasta shits in the morning!

Everything here is spot on, esp. that meme.

AChildOfBoredom
07-07-2021, 04:41 PM
Has anyone here read about the sugar free Haribo gummy bears and the reviews they’ve gotten on Amazon?


It was my last class of the semester, and the final exam was worth 30% of our grade.
After a late night study session I felt confident, but I had to decide between sleeping in or cooking breakfast. My eyelids chose sleep.
My stomach later regretted this decision, and after several uncomfortable stomach growls, I finally decided to make a quick stop by the campus bookstore and grab a snack before my test. Since the semester was ending and everyone was going home for the summer, a lot of items were on sale, including the snacks and candy that they kept up front. Being in the hungry state that I was in, it felt only logical to pick the largest, yet least expensive candy in order to get more bang for my buck.
And there they sat: two bags of Haribo Sugar-Free Gummi Bears, buy one get one free.
"What a deal!" I thought naïvely. I would eat one bag before my test, and one bag afterwards.
As I walked to class, I gleefully chewed on those abominable little bastards, unaware of the utter mayhem that they would soon unleash upon my poor, poor anus.
I sat down at my desk as the professor informed us that, due to issues with cheating in the past, restroom breaks would be prohibited until the completion of the exam.
"I'll give you 10 minutes to use the restroom now; this will be your last chance. Any takers?"
The demon bears hadn't released their unholy necromancy upon my stomach yet, so in my moment of ignorant foolishness, I remained seated, still munching on those miniature bear-shaped bombs.
After the students wise enough to take the professor's offer had returned, the professor handed out the test. I was six questions in when it happened.
It started subtly at first, almost like a slight tingly sensation in my lower abdomen. I thought nothing of it, assuming my intestines were just doing their thang. Little did I know that my intestines were trying desperately to warn me of the horror that was on the horizon.
By question 9 it happened again, but this time it was followed by a sharp pain, as if those infernal hellions had orchestrated an attack upon my colon. I fought to contain the groan that tried escaping my lips. It was at this point I began to panic; something was going horribly long, and I needed to get through this test before it got any worse.
By question 14 my worst fear was upon me; the Satan bears' burning, hot, liquidy dark magic crashed against my anal sphincter like a tidal wave. I was able to close the hatch just in time, but those relentless, toxic bears beat against it like Orcs breaking down the doors of Helm's Deep. I knew I wouldn't be able to so much as shift in my seat without risking a breach.
I kept fighting through my exam, clenching my cheeks with all my might. Beads of sweat began rolling down my neck. Suddenly, a loud, gurgling war cry came from my belly, and the entire class lifted their heads.
At this point, nothing mattered except expelling this ungodly presence from my bowels. With 15 questions left, I promptly wrote C for every answer and ran out of the classroom. My professor yelled something, but I was too preoccupied with the volcanic eruption that needed to take place before I could find sweet, sweet relief.
I burst into the restroom like the Kool-Aid man and, behold, the handicap stall was empty. Sun rays from the adjacent window shone upon it, as if it were a gift from God himself. It took me less than .5 seconds to undo my belt buckle, pull down my pants, and finally relax my weary buttocks upon the toilet seat.
It took absolutely no effort to expel this demon. Almost immediately, the floodgates of hell were opened and the damned, liquified souls of an entire bag's worth of gummi bears cried as they burned through my sphincter and into the watery abyss below. I had never felt such simultaneous relief and anguish in my life.
After 30 more minutes of this, I immediately went home, dug a hole in my backyard, and burned the remaining bag of gummi bears.
I leave with this; do not, I repeat do NOT eat these spawns of Satan. Not only did they cause me to fail my final test, but the anguish I experienced is something I wouldn't wish upon anyone, not even my worst enemy. The only place these god forsaken hell bears belong are buried deep below the Earth's surface.

I’m disappointed they were discontinued, as I wanted to find out for myself. Not by trying them myself, but perhaps leaving a bowl of them in the break room at work and seeing what happened.

indiegirl
07-08-2021, 06:56 PM
https://youtu.be/t0ZxO7x6IEE?t=138

Someone posted about passing out on the toilet and honestly this is the most humiliating way to go down on live news. LOL I wouldn't be able to step foot back into my place of work if that was me LOLLLL. She was probably holding in a spawn of satan poop for too long.

TheBrownFox
07-08-2021, 06:59 PM
I think that yummy cheeseburger from Friendly's, and that fudge sundae with M&Ms is starting to do...its...thang...lmfao. Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now!