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moneybags
03-25-2022, 05:11 PM
Leveling up on my money is probably the best thing I can focus on right now.


https://youtu.be/G5mBWva21HgOkay

techqueen
03-29-2022, 12:15 PM
The biggest thing that has made the difference for me has been EFT tapping and meditation. My entire brain feels normal af after a session.

Also, staying celibate. I love to fuck but you know that meme going around saying when you fuck someone their spirit enters your body. That shit is true.

I don't care how sexy a dude is. I'm so much happier when I keep my vagina to myself.

moneybags
04-01-2022, 09:29 PM
I made this mistake of telling a customer I was celibate, but I self-pleasure and he thinks the cure is a “real dick” ugh. Nope the antidote for me is NOT letting a dick anywhere near me unless I’m getting paid. In the future, I think more people will see celibacy as a valid and healthy life choice. Men can’t fathom as strippers why we don’t have sex. Do you want to work on your day off-I don’t either! I agree sex is sacred. Celibate for over 5 years! Our society is so hyper sexual that celibacy is seen as a “wrongness.”

Anyways, set my intentions for April. I didn’t want to take a day off work, but energetically it feels April 1st is the perfect day for energetic spring cleaning. I’m going to do some tapping tonight on money.

I did my budget for April. I’m putting all my energy into my financial goals. I’m doing something called “$1000 month.” to increase my income a thousand dollars.

I’m doing a detox from my crush as well and finding another practitioner temporarily. Will probably see him again. I just need some space so I can reset our relationship to a more professional one while I focus on my financial goals.

I’m also working on my fitness goals

I knew I would do the right thing, but it wasn’t easy!

charlie61
04-04-2022, 06:42 AM
I do have a counselor assigned to me that I think I talk to once a month or if I have an emergency. We talk in a week for the first time.

I've been on my medication for 5 days now and I'm going to ask them to switch me to something else. I do notice that I feel a little more calm and focused, but the difference is so subtle that it's not worth the side effects. And the side effects aren't even that bad at all it's just that the benefits are so minor they outweigh them. And amoxetine isn't something that builds up in your system and needs time to work better. I've heard a lot of people who tried medicine for their ADHD say things like how once they got on it it was like a night and day transformation and that they are so mad at themselves for not seeking treatment sooner because it made such an amazing difference.....definitely not my experience so far.

Yeah, i think placebo effect could be in play for folks who say stuff like that. More often than not, i think it's common for the body to feel side effects before feeling benefits since every system is adjusting...

Genoveve
04-04-2022, 04:37 PM
I have changed my stance on the medication somewhat. The side effects are now barely noticeable and while the benefits are still a lot less than what I was expecting, there are still some and they are helping me some. So I'm wondering if it's worth the trade-off of being on something that isn't habit forming that I can go off of whenever I want. Actually I think what I am going to do is ask for something stronger, and if it makes a huge difference then it might be worth but if it doesn't also doesn't make a huge difference I'll go back to amoxetine.

Genoveve
04-07-2022, 03:09 PM
^^No clue if I am on the maximum dose, just told them that I would like to switch to something else.

My counselor asked me for some short term goals and the only thing I could really come up with was decorating my bedroom because since I moved I haven't done hardly any decorating. I am motivated to have it done by our next session and it's looking like I will; the only thing I have left to buy is some sort of computer chair and the only reason I haven't yet is because I need to see the rest of the room completed in order to know what style to get.

Genoveve
04-16-2022, 03:57 PM
I took my first dose of my new medication, Concerta, today. I guess it is a stimulant but not an amphetamine. Idk if it's something that needs time to work, but I took it over 6 hours ago and feel nothing.

As far as my room progress; assembling my bed has been very time-consuming and I'm hoping to finally finish it tonight. Planning to make my end tables tomorrow so I should have them painted and set up soon, then I can hang the rest of my art up and pick out a computer chair. Once this is room is done I plan to do the cubby area in between my bedroom and bathroom and turn it into a sort of altar.

SnuffleUffleGrass
04-17-2022, 07:00 AM
Lemon water makes me happy these days. & Also reducing sugar in my diet, it's bad to always indulge the sweet tooth as you age.

indiegirl
04-17-2022, 01:47 PM
Lemon water makes me happy these days. & Also reducing sugar in my diet, it's bad to always indulge the sweet tooth as you age.

Lemon water. Ahhhh yes. So tasty! Another one of my faves is strawberry infused water. Ermagerdddddd! I feel like a fancy bitch after drinking it.

moneybags
04-17-2022, 09:30 PM
I’m reading codependency manifesto. My old codependent patterns of caring too much about others are creeping in. I need to set boundaries with some unhealthy people. I’m going to start by distancing myself slowly.

Genoveve
04-18-2022, 06:30 PM
Well I read that Concerta IS supposed to kick in like, within an hour. I felt nothing that day and even poured out and counted my pills that night to see if I actually took one, you know how sometimes you can think about doing something and it tricks you into thinking you did it when you didn't. But no I definitely took one. I had a headache almost all day that day and took a ton of excedrin and figured that probably wasn't the best day to judge its effectiveness, so I took it again yesterday but yesterday I wasn't home all day and drank prosecco during the day and red wine at night so again, not a great day to judge the effectiveness. I did feel uncharacteristically organized when I was getting ready to leave the house and very calm while driving but it was subtle so I didn't think much of it. Today is the first normal, routine day I've taken it. I don't feel any stimulant affect at all but I do feel more calm and organized, way more than with the atomoxetine. So far no side effects.

I did read that there's something called the 'Concerta crash' which is where your symptoms come back worse than before once it wears off, but I feel like that's the case with anything. If you eat sugar you get a sugar crash, if you drink coffee you get a caffeine crash, if you take pain pills regularly you get rebound pain, if you smoke weed all the time you're extra cranky when you don't smoke...etc.


I’m reading codependency manifesto. My old codependent patterns of caring too much about others are creeping in. I need to set boundaries with some unhealthy people. I’m going to start by distancing myself slowly.

Are you distancing yourself slowly for your sake or theirs? As opposed to doing it quickly or cutting them out period.

Genoveve
04-21-2022, 02:18 PM
To update on the Concerta, I am actually loving it. I feel no side effects whatsoever, I actually don't feel anything especially not the stimulants probably because I'm on the lowest dose and drink a lot of strong coffee. I'm just more focused and not in a hyperfocused tweaker kind of way. I just......do stuff. I'll be like 'Okay I'm going to do this now,' and then I just.....go do it. Then 'Okay now I'm going to do this,' and I just do it. My brain isn't pulling me into 19 pointless directions at once.

My bedroom is basically finished; my bougie computer chair arrives tomorrow and I just need to buy nails so I can hang the last thing (a mirror) and that's it. I've already started on the shrine area.

moneybags
04-21-2022, 10:57 PM
^^^alright. I forget what a blessing good mental health is. Finding the right meds is hard. I’m glad you found something that worked for you.

My mental health has been better since I detached from everyone. I’m focusing on my life and using my time and energy for my highest good.

I’m ignoring anyone or anything that brings me down or isn’t in alignment with my highest self. Screw everyone! I’m way too nice and I’m done being an inauthentic “nice girl”. Being nice gets you no where in life. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna be unnecessarily mean or rude, but if putting myself first pisses anyone off-well good riddance.

Listened to some law of attraction videos today that raised my vibration. I meditated twice today and am committed to doing energy work everyday to keep my vibes high.

Genoveve
04-21-2022, 11:15 PM
Being nice gets you no where in life. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna be unnecessarily mean or rude, but if putting myself first pisses anyone off-well good riddance.

it’s true. And when you start putting yourself first you attract people who respect you and like you for yourself, not for what you can do for them.

smeca
04-22-2022, 02:13 AM
Exercise/getting outside daily, preferably first thing. I feel great for the day if I get my heart going in the morning, or go for a walk and hear the birds singing. I need to do something daily or i feel like a slug. Except Sundays-that is my no obligation day. I do a lot and deserve a rest.
(This is now I work a day job. Exercise wasn't a problem while dancing but I kept a work schedule and Sunday as a rest day bc Saturday night was the longest busiest night.)

Avoiding negative thinking. I'd say positive thinking but I think it's more important first to notice when I'm dwelling on something negative, even if it's just flippant or silly, and cut it out. All it does is bring your energy down. Same with worrying- although if anyone has tips on how to stop worrying ,like a process, I'm all ears. I know logically there's no point worrying what you cant control, and in the past I have 'let go', feeling lighter and almost cheery, just not sure how I was so chill.

And I KNOW the key is gratitude, I need to work on truly feeling grateful for what I have.

Ask for help, talk about what you're struggling with, someone may help or at least it gets out your head.

Somebody said something online about happy marriages, but it ties in if you have a partner or maybe even with friends. It was to do a nice thing for them. Sounds simple but we get wrapped up in ourselves so easily, our problems, what we need from others etc, and just refocusing on doing something out of love to see somebody smile dissolves all that and makes you feel good too. It can be small things like making them a snack, but something that will warm their heart and yours.

At the moment I struggle with wanting some recognition for what I do in this household, or feeling that I shouldn't require any. Like when am I being pissy and when am I just tired? My job is flexible but I do prioritise when I have deadlines since it pays and we need my wage lol. I think I have housewife mindset but actually we both work, so I shouldn't think that way so much.

More practically- bc I prioritise my job I finish and go do something fun, and realise we have nothing for dinner and i feel like an idiot. I've taken to taking 5 mins during my work day to make a list of real life things I need to do: mainly it's plan dinner for today and tomorrow, and I'll see if I need to go buy milk or food or whatever. I have a list in the kitchen that I add to whenever I see we're running out of something, so when I do a supermarket run I take it and don't over/under shop. I feel really good when I'm on top of the food and money like this.

moneybags
04-22-2022, 09:11 AM
^^^ill second avoiding negative thinking. I don’t want to be a Pollyanna either, but I’d say it’s better to error on the side of being too positive.

Meditation helps you show down your thoughts, so you can shift them to healthier thoughts I’m meditating twice a day for the rest of April. I’ve noticed a huge difference.

It’s 11:11 btw

Genoveve
12-16-2022, 03:02 PM
I've been making some changes lately; once DST hit I could not wake up before like 10:30 am, I kept waking up between 10:30-11:15 and whenever I'd try to get up earlier I'd just keep hitting the snooze button and I'm not even a big snooze button person. It was so depressing waking up that late when it gets dark so early, and I was starting to wonder if something was wrong with me since I just could not seem to wake up. Then after seeing an inspiring tiktok I decided to just start waking the fuck up and since then I have been successfully making myself wake up a little earlier each day. I should officially be waking up before 8am by this weekend. It's crazy because it proves to me that the whole snooze button phenomena was completely psychological, once I firmly decided to stop hitting it I never hit it again. I've also been a lot better at making myself actually get up out of my bed and starting the day quicker too.

A thing I have always struggled with is working out earlier; even though it would be most advantageous for me to work out first thing in the day I am basically never able to do it but the last few days I have just been making myself do it and since I'm really enjoying it I'm planning for early workouts to become my norm.

Another thing I have been struggling with for basically all of my 30s is losing motivation and energy at sundown. Once the sun sets I just don't want to do anything that requires any sort of mental or physical energy, even if it's stuff I like doing. My plan is to be getting up early enough to where all of my stuff that requires energy is done by the time it's dark, I feel like that's ultimately going to be way more effective since trying to get myself to be productive at night has just never worked.

carmen_b
12-16-2022, 06:17 PM
^ Your plan is excellent !
I find that I HAVE to wake up by 8 otherwise there is too much " light " loss as well in winter.
I'm the same too . I struggle in a way to be " out " past 7:30 p.m. !
I have made actionable steps to be out and be comfy until 8:30 p.m. ( currently some days I'm comfy out until then ).
I tend to just want to be home ( or wherever I'm sleeping ) by 8:45-9 at the latest .
I typically just don't stay out past 9 anyway but I want it to be at least *on* the table once a week ( such as if I'm out with a date or out at a live show ) to stay out until 10 or 11 . Otherwise I miss a lot of the " new city " energy ( such as my comedy shows ,live music things, ect. ) !

Genoveve
12-19-2022, 03:26 PM
I'm officially waking up before 8. On Friday my pets woke me up too early at like 7 which sucked and I was tired all day, the next day was the first time my alarm was set before 8, it was set to 7:58 (lol) but unfortunately because I had turned up my white noise machine I didn't hear my alarm as soon as it went off and I woke up two min later at 8:00, but today it was set for like 7:48 but my pets woke me up ay 7:30 and I stayed up and felt fine. Tomorrow it's set for 7:44, 6 is the ultimate goal. Since falling alseep earlier is the biggest factor the rule I have been following is to have everything done, have all the big lights off (I switch to mood lighting) and be in bed at least 60 min before I have to be asleep, 90 min is better. Oh and of course no caffeine after 5, which of course that cut-off time will become earlier and earlier.

Genoveve
12-30-2022, 04:58 PM
I've been waking up before 7, tomorrow I get up at 6:30 which I think is what I'm going to stick with for a while. Today was the first time that I was up and going early enough to be walking my dog while the sun rose. With waking up at 6:30 I can take my time getting up and still walk my dog at or before sunrise (it's rising at 7:30 here currently) and then still have plenty of time to workout before getting on cam. I have also been having success with camming a bit earlier than I usually do, over time I'm going to stream earlier and earlier and if I'm still able to make money doing that I may start getting up at 5-5:30 so that I'm able to walk my dog when it's still completely dark in the morning once it's hot again.

kimbe
12-31-2022, 12:42 AM
I admire your initiative, I think it's hard to get up early (before 8 ) when I don't have anything specific scheduled. I would need to go earlier to bed though..

HoneyMachado
01-02-2023, 12:11 PM
I am getting back into fitness and mental reprogramming. I am worthy of all my heart desires and will reach my goals.

SnuffleUffleGrass
01-03-2023, 12:15 PM
Just staying hydrated is important, especially as one ages. & Sadly due to the unpleasantness of UTIs and kidney stones, sometimes drinking a lot of water helps prevent trips to the hospital.

AvaJade
01-08-2023, 11:09 AM
^ I'm in the process of being diagnosed with ADHD and it seems I may be on the spectrum too. I wanted to comment in this thread when you first posted it but don't even know where to start - it's all so raw. It's a big shock to start learning about this stuff in my early 40s but it makes sense of a lot of my past.

At the moment I'm going through fatigue from burning out in a vanilla environment (again). I feel I'm just coming out the other side of a nasty bout of depression and anxiety linked to it all. I'm really proud of myself for dealing with things so well this time...am probably being vague but I don't have the energy to go into detail right now!

AvaJade
01-08-2023, 11:14 AM
Oh, as to the point of the thread. I'm working on being more brave and going for some of the things I really want in life. I can't just settle anymore - playing nice and playing the 'game' in certain environments doesn't suit me that well and has been destroying my soul recently, LOL.

I think learning more about myself has helped me to give less fucks. I know I'll be OK with or without the approval of others.

Likethis
01-21-2023, 10:39 AM
^ I'm in the process of being diagnosed with ADHD and it seems I may be on the spectrum too. I wanted to comment in this thread when you first posted it but don't even know where to start - it's all so raw. It's a big shock to start learning about this stuff in my early 40s but it makes sense of a lot of my past.

At the moment I'm going through fatigue from burning out in a vanilla environment (again). I feel I'm just coming out the other side of a nasty bout of depression and anxiety linked to it all. I'm really proud of myself for dealing with things so well this time...am probably being vague but I don't have the energy to go into detail right now!
Keep it up, it's great that you're dealing with it all. Learning about the possibility that you could be having either one of those diagnosis after living your whole life not knowing about it can be incredibly overwhelming. Depression and anxiety can really hurt, it's such a struggle. I completely understand that you can't go into detail.