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carmen_b
06-29-2022, 12:06 PM
We walked by victorias secret and went in.
It was super fun shopping together we had actually never been to one together.
I got a bunch of panties and a bra. Where did all my panties go anyway ? I had some 6 months ago and was down to like two pairs now I swear. Now I have a nice bag of em. :)

It's been a balancing act.
I know he's super super generous ( like there is no way to say otherwise ) but I am still an hesitant to give him or his daughter any more than like 2-3 hours during the M - F 9-5 time frame.
It is just this mental thing I can not seem to get over even though I know that I can afford to do so.

neverendingkneebruises
08-04-2022, 12:22 AM
It's so sad to me when I see dancers consistently do well at work but stay with deadbeat broke bums. If well off men will pay you hundreds or thousands in VIP rooms at strip clubs, you can absolutely find one to pay all your bills & spoil you like a princess!

miss.a.p1600
08-04-2022, 03:42 AM
^that really boggled my mind.

I worked with some supreme hustlers but their actual boyfriends were deadbeats living off of them.

Mf I’m hustling men in AND out of the adult industry.

If you ain’t payin, I ain’t stayin. Period!

The meter is ALWAYS running!

miss.a.p1600
08-04-2022, 03:43 AM
Shouts out to the REAL men paying ALL the bills.

Not 3/4, not 75%, not 7/8, ………All of them! Every last dollar.

carmen_b
08-04-2022, 01:28 PM
Right ? Why would you be with a guy who makes less than you lol ?
The entire concept .... just no.


It's so sad to me when I see dancers consistently do well at work but stay with deadbeat broke bums. If well off men will pay you hundreds or thousands in VIP rooms at strip clubs, you can absolutely find one to pay all your bills & spoil you like a princess!

carmen_b
08-04-2022, 01:49 PM
My guy is spoiling me less.

This is something I obviously don't enjoy lol.

chanzep
08-04-2022, 02:00 PM
It's so sad to me when I see dancers consistently do well at work but stay with deadbeat broke bums. If well off men will pay you hundreds or thousands in VIP rooms at strip clubs, you can absolutely find one to pay all your bills & spoil you like a princess!

I always found it weird but it's very common, just read on this forum your see lots of girls paying to live with men it's sad. Maybe they are lonely I know some girls prefer to be with someone they are not really into than be alone. Or some are blinded by love and glad a man accepts them.
I couldnt it wouldn't work for me.

miss.a.p1600
08-05-2022, 04:45 AM
L getting jealous because a prospective client was slick trying to flirt with me.

Bruh I am an attractive woman to a lot of men.

Not my fault you can’t provide your way out of a paper bag if your life depended on it. If I have to work, then you have to accept I will meet suitors through work who could replace you. It is what it is.

Pay ALL these bills and you wouldn’t have to worry about that.

xxxGothBarbie
08-06-2022, 09:39 AM
LoL while it's not a bill , last night I made bf buy me clothes online after I made him buy the food delivery. If you aren't spending your $ on ac then you're spoiling me in other ways. I refuse to spend any of my savings at this point staying here.

carmen_b
08-06-2022, 05:14 PM
My dude owes me hahaha

I will be perusing menus to suggest for his return next week.
Oh , who are we kidding ? I'll just call Monday and get reservations too haha .

carmen_b
08-06-2022, 05:16 PM
One of his cards is out next to the spot we keep our keys.
Maybe it's a hint to take it to the spa on Monday as a " I'm sorry I traveled by myself this weekend and not WITH you my darling " apology.

miss.a.p1600
08-10-2022, 04:48 PM
L pays most of the household bills except one that I want him to start paying.

So I told him he needed to contact a male prospective client that he knew was flirting with me to help get it paid.

His ego started kicking in. But I still think his masculine pride is missing since he has yet to offer to pay it.

I’m going to get him or another man/other men to pay it. If he knows what’s good for him he will offer to pay it.

miss.a.p1600
08-10-2022, 05:11 PM
I always found it weird but it's very common, just read on this forum your see lots of girls paying to live with men it's sad. Maybe they are lonely I know some girls prefer to be with someone they are not really into than be alone. Or some are blinded by love and glad a man accepts them.
I couldnt it wouldn't work for me.

My guy friend, whose baby moms was a stripper, said that a couple points of their relationship she made more than he did and she used the money as leverage over him to run the show and gain compliance from him.

Well he didn’t like that too much and started out earning her so she would have too much leverage over him.

I think some women use the adult industry to make a lot of money, more than their man, so they have that control factor as well.

Then there are the women who earn a lot more than their partners but are okay with being financially dominated at home.

miss.a.p1600
08-10-2022, 05:46 PM
Beware of men who gaslight you into thinking it’s okay for them not to provide.

They’ll say stuff like

“With the pandemic/inflation/rising costs/(insert excuse here) it takes TWO incomes…”

Or

“This isn’t the 50’s”

xxxGothBarbie
08-10-2022, 09:12 PM
Beware of men who gaslight you into thinking it’s okay for them not to provide.

They’ll say stuff like

“With the pandemic/inflation/rising costs/(insert excuse here) it takes TWO incomes…”

Or

“This isn’t the 50’s”

Yup or when they start spending on themselves more than you. That's OK bc as far as he goes , I'm totally broke lol
Plus he still hasn't gotten sex. I'm not putting out shit until I'm able to not have to pay for my own food anymore.

miss.a.p1600
08-10-2022, 10:27 PM
^And DEFINITELY don’t do men who have to pay out money to their ex wives and dependent kids (unless they make 7 figures, it’s NOT worth the headache to have to split coins)

miss.a.p1600
08-11-2022, 04:46 PM
I flat out told L (when he was dumb enough to ask a “hypothetical” question about what if I paid the rent instead of him) that if I’m paying rent or any other major bills, I will kick him out / move out and be single.

Why would I pay all the bills AND deal with a man AND fuck them for free?!?

Boy you better come correct. Pussy ain’t cheap or free. Neither is dealing with mens annoying quirks. Compensate me!

baer45
08-12-2022, 10:10 AM
The important question to ask is: What if all the payments stop today, will it destroy your life or will you have a buffer zone to restart?

When I signed up to this forum, I was semi retired from sex work. I was offered a sugar deal by a long time customer . I wanted to move out of my old apartment because I do not like the landlord. This person offered to pay my rent for a new place, and gave me a generous monthly allowance. But one day, someone left a note in my mail box and basically said: I have paid 3 months rent for you, and you need to find a new place to live. This someone even left her name on the bottom, and I know it's the wife. Even now, look back, I appreciate that she gave me 3 months buffer. I know it's a drop in the bucket for them. It really helped me to set a new starting point for life. Plus, I had saved up most of the allowance, that helped too.

My IMHO, it's a BAD idea to have someone to pay all your bills unless you are married to him. If not, at least, he has to pay the bill through you. you can act as a proxy. Everything is under your name.

Plus, If a man pays all my bill, I will make sure he knows that I save up money. I won't give him any idea that I am under his control if he threatens me financially.

baer45
08-12-2022, 10:16 AM
To respond to/answer all of you ladies:

I have three daughters of my own, at 31 years old.
He has one daughter that lives with his ex-wife.
When I met him he was making waayyy more than me, had his own place, car, blah blah blah. The usual stuff that a grown man should have. He lost his job and that's when a series of back-to-back bullshit started happening.

Hurricane Harvey poured through Houston so he lost his car due to flooding. He was then let go from his job and when he found another one, broke his foot on day one :irked:. He got back on his feet (metaphorically) but it was honestly a slow-going process. I was the one paying all of the bills while he wallowed in this depression over his finances. And I stuck with him only because I genuinely cared and I'd already seen where his life and ambitions lied before knowing me. I genuinely believed that it was immoral to break up with a man over money. I don't believe that stupid shit anymore, but I did at the time.

But I reached my personal limit with being the breadwinner, maid, therapist, and fuck toy with nothing but "he's nice to me" in return and told him that it was over. The man apologized for everything, swore up and down he would do better with adding to my life financially..... and then as he was making these changes he was hit with child support.

My bills aren't that high. But I'm still "helping" him pay our rent while I also pay the utilities and my own personal bills (cell phone, car insurance, etc.) because his child support is that damn high.

That is what I mean by "he's broke".

It sounds like it's time for me to call it quits.

I'm not a young 20-year-old with no kids anymore but I've never had a problem with getting a man to spend on me. My daughter's father paid for everything when we were together and I met him when I was just 16. It's embarrassing to think about it now but I didn't even know what size shoes my own kids wore or what the cost of milk was because his money paid for all of it. I would just tell him what I needed and he'd get it. But he also used his money to control me. So I left.

The man I dealt with after him would sneak hundreds into my purse or pay for things that I would mention in passing. He bought stuff for my girls all the time. He was married so it felt good to not take a guy seriously and get spoiled. I was just emotionally scarred from my controlling and abusive ex and swore off "provider men" because I assumed that they were all like that. How foolish. Now I have a nice guy that couldn't afford a one-bedroom if I dumped him today.

That is something I experienced. Been in love with a broke man, and had to see his dream gradually dies.

carmen_b
08-12-2022, 11:02 AM
Always have a buffer !! ^^^
A huge buffer is ideal ha !

That’s like the coolest wife ever ha!
Three months ?
She must have been so done with him !
If I was still attached to my dude I would have been so much more dramatic than a nice note with three months notice !!

miss.a.p1600
08-12-2022, 11:13 AM
^They’re paying for the woman to “quietly” leave.

A severance package if you will.

It’s in their benefit to share a bit of change.

One of my relatives is the OG sugar baby and she discovered her now husband was messing with another woman in some country in Asia. She knew he promised her all kinds of gifts/money/etc so she told him to give her a bit of change (pay her car off) then cut her off.

Sometimes it’s easier to get what you want when you give people a little bit of what they want.

People more willing to quietly move on if they’re compensated a little for the hassle.

baer45
08-12-2022, 09:50 PM
I did walk away quietly.

Sam38g
08-13-2022, 11:28 AM
Always have a buffer !! ^^^
A huge buffer is ideal ha !

That’s like the coolest wife ever ha!
Three months ?
She must have been so done with him !
If I was still attached to my dude I would have been so much more dramatic than a nice note with three months notice !!

Sounds like she was in a relationship with the wrong person in that marriage. Should have tried being a sugar baby to the wife instead.

carmen_b
08-13-2022, 11:41 AM
^ I bet the wife also scored ( cash wise ).
Honestly some guys have enough to share.
I bet she wound have preferred not to share obviously !
95% chance she didn’t approve but small chance of “ do what you want “ policy also !

Sam38g
08-13-2022, 12:36 PM
^ I bet the wife also scored ( cash wise ).
Honestly some guys have enough to share.
I bet she wound have preferred not to share obviously !
95% chance she didn’t approve but small chance of “ do what you want “ policy also !

It could have been her money that he was spending, which is not uncommon at all.

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 01:47 PM
^That would be horrendous.

I wish a mf would…..

I remember seeing those stories about the Tinder Swindler and thinking to myself “the moment a dude asked for money, a loan, to hold or borrow anything would be the moment I’d ditch him”

Those women were sugar mommas who didn’t know they were sugar mommas.

carmen_b
08-13-2022, 02:12 PM
^ Same. Loaning $100 or something is different than a dude asking for large amounts. Like ..... seems a little obvious but of course all sex workers would say that hahaha.

carmen_b
08-13-2022, 02:13 PM
Sam38 : I honestly didn't even think of that ! BUT yes it could be the woman who had the financial power the whole time !

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 04:00 PM
^ Same. Loaning $100 or something is different than a dude asking for large amounts. Like ..... seems a little obvious but of course all sex workers would say that hahaha.

< $100 is my threshold (significant others only) and it better be returned within 24hr or less.

Once L borrowed $50 and I raged against him for asking me for money (so he’d get the point not to rely on me for money - I don’t like being in a mommy role) and lucky for him he returned it within a few hours.

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 04:03 PM
Sam38 : I honestly didn't even think of that ! BUT yes it could be the woman who had the financial power the whole time !

I also believe the man can be the higher earner but the woman still can have the financial power.

Sam38g
08-13-2022, 06:40 PM
I also believe the man can be the higher earner but the woman still can have the financial power.

Women making more money than men is growing, but one has to take into consideration about inherited money too. Some women have more money & assets than the man they married. Paying off the other woman is cheaper than getting a divorce & having to pay Palimony.

If the man is earning and has all the money, his wife paying off the mistress would be noticed & he has all the power in the relationship. But since the wife paid her off & he didn't say anything, tells me the wife is the one with the assets.

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 07:21 PM
^to your second paragraph = not necessarily…. Remember Scottie Pippen? His wife said on their reality show that she controlled the money even though he was the top earner in the relationship and she didn’t work outside the home.

She managed the finances so she would be able to more easily notice if he was cheating…..and could make him end an affair if he was.

There are men who earn the money and let their wife manage it especially if the wife is trustworthy and better with money and/ or they don’t want to be tempted to spend on other women. Or sometimes these men with a lot of money are financially submissive and the wife HAS to control the money (before another broad steps in and cuts her out)

To your first paragraph… you pose an interesting point

whirlerz
08-13-2022, 07:23 PM
Remember that dude that owned the sports team (that he later lost by spouting racial shit)?

He had a mixed sugar baby, she had a house & some fancy car(s), the wife & her palled around occasionally, til she she up & sued the SB for the goods, & won, too!

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 07:36 PM
^Me personally if I had an inheritance I would marry someone with equal or greater wealth for that exact reason.

I’ll be damned a man cheat on me then I be stuck with the mf to not pay alimony. If I made more I’d be smart enough to get an iron clad prenup

Mf ain’t about to use my money AND cheat. Hell to the naw

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 07:38 PM
Remember that dude that owned the sports team (that he later lost by spouting racial shit)?

He had a mixed sugar baby, she had a house & some fancy car(s), the wife & her palled around occasionally, til she she up & sued the SB for the goods, & won, too!

I remember that.

Sugar baby got too comfortable and wouldn’t stay behind the scenes and running her mouth to the media.

I think that law where wife could sue mistress is California

whirlerz
08-13-2022, 07:49 PM
Technically if we work adult industry, men pay all our bills by default :D

But a good point by the wise ladies here is use the money you save to invest in yourself bc you never know if/when a rainy day comes you want to be prepared.

Also any OG kept women you learn from?

Genie Sayles was one of the first woman I learned from. This broad went from single mom on welfare to millionaire.

I also learned a little from Anna Nicole … classic OG sugar baby had that 80 year old buying cars, homes, etc for her and her kid. Only downside was she couldn’t secure the legacy bag and died way too soon.

What is OG?
See, in ANS case there wasn't a wife, but a family member (his son Howard)
Her big mistake was not securing by getting her name on a will, or TOD (transferable on death).

She had some tape recording of him saying he wanted her tb supported, which means SHIT in court. The written word stands.

Also, she was careless w/her health, especially at the end, she had a 105° fever, should have went to the hospital fuck the media she was worried about .

That guy she was with didn't give a damn about her, Howard the atty/drug provider.

whirlerz
08-13-2022, 07:53 PM
^Me personally if I had an inheritance I would marry someone with equal or greater wealth for that exact reason.

I’ll be damned a man cheat on me then I be stuck with the mf to not pay alimony. If I made more I’d be smart enough to get an iron clad prenup

Mf ain’t about to use my money AND cheat. Hell to the naw

A prenup would be in order, or you're fucked, not in a good way..

My one health provider married a bum she had to pay him alimony, he didn't work either.

miss.a.p1600
08-13-2022, 08:01 PM
What is OG?
See, in ANS case there wasn't a wife, but a family member (his son Howard)
Her big mistake was not securing by getting her name on a will, or TOD (transferable on death).

She had some tape recording of him saying he wanted her tb supported, which means SHIT in court. The written word stands.

Also, she was careless w/her health, especially at the end, she had a 105° fever, should have went to the hospital fuck the media she was worried about .

That guy she was with didn't give a damn about her, Howard the atty/drug provider.

OG is like the original
Like the ancestors that paved the way
Wouldnt know as much without the elders who did it before you

Youre right. I don’t think Anna Nicole’s husband cared enough to make sure she was taken care of without him. He was fine with lavishing here in the moment but that was it. She was overly dependent on him for major wealth although if she kept working or invested well instead of excessive drinking n drugging she could have been very wealthy in her own right without that old ass man.

whirlerz
08-13-2022, 09:27 PM
Also if you are a housewife, or even if you are a working spouse and would suffer financially if your dude died, you absolutely need to be beneficiary on a life insurance policy.

If it’s not voluntary then Pull an Anna Nicole, tape a hidden voice recorder in your cleavage, and get a verbal confirmation that you’ll be included in the will

Make sure they pay bills ……. Even posthumously

That did not & will not hold up in court, it must be in writing.. TOD is the way to go, a simple form, have him sign, get it notarized & you're good

whirlerz
08-13-2022, 09:32 PM
OG is like the original
Like the ancestors that paved the way
Wouldnt know as much without the elders who did it before you

Youre right. I don’t think Anna Nicole’s husband cared enough to make sure she was taken care of without him. He was fine with lavishing here in the moment but that was it. She was overly dependent on him for major wealth although if she kept working or invested well instead of excessive drinking n drugging she could have been very wealthy in her own right without that old ass man.

I meant that last guy she was living with, his name was Howard, he was an attorney.
But you could be right about her husband, Howard Marshall.

He did try to get her to start a perfume or something like that, so she'd have something on her own, & yeah, keep working, she was about party.

miss.a.p1600
08-19-2022, 06:32 AM
https://youtu.be/W4e4WbJpPpI

How to beware of landing in the “struggle love”/sugar mommy role (unless you really like that sort of thing)

This also explains why some women consciously choose men who don’t make near as much money as they do and financially support men

xxxGothBarbie
08-22-2022, 06:29 PM
https://youtu.be/W4e4WbJpPpI

How to beware of landing in the “struggle love”/sugar mommy role (unless you really like that sort of thing)

This also explains why some women consciously choose men who don’t make near as much money as they do and financially support men

The clown I'm with makes $700 a week and could be on his own but noooo his dumbest has to waste it on beer & other nonsense. I'm the only one saving to leave here by next month. I'm unattracted to guys that can't/don't want to save their money.

carmen_b
08-22-2022, 06:40 PM
Kudos to J.
I saw him write the 3k mortgage check out.
My total for living for the month ? I paid the lawn guy $80 haha.

miss.a.p1600
08-23-2022, 05:39 AM
^nice!!!

I will give L a little bit of grace. He paid for the living quarters, has been buying more groceries lately (cause I’ll be damned if I buy groceries AND cook AND clean), and offering more.

Although I can’t help shake the feeling that I want more bills covered by him which he could do if he took this higher paying job but since he won’t then I’m going back to that mentality if one man won’t cover all your bills then gotta recruit Bob, Chad, Steven, and whoever else……multiple men!

A lot of these men out here were not raised to provide and if they do they’re barely scratching the surface. Then they wonder why they get left, cheated on, or only desperate women they don’t want are attracted to them.

miss.a.p1600
08-23-2022, 05:48 AM
The clown I'm with makes $700 a week and could be on his own but noooo his dumbest has to waste it on beer & other nonsense. I'm the only one saving to leave here by next month. I'm unattracted to guys that can't/don't want to save their money.

That’s really frustrating! It’s like some people are so caught up in the day-to-day survival mode they don’t think that far ahead for financial planning.

Men have fragile egos and some of them don’t believe they can be financially independent because they’ve lived their entire lives barely getting by so they get complacent and accept that where they are is where they’ll always be.

L seems like this. He wastes a lot of money on frivolous shit - to self sooth. Then wastes money helping Bertha when he doesn’t have to or need to. He coddles the fuck out of her and those kids. I wouldn’t be surprised if this bitch quietly makes more money then him but having all these fake financial crisis to make him pay for divorcing her.

I also have a relative who does the same thing. Self soothing with booze and partying on the regular but not much saved up for future needs. And probably check to check.

I get really frustrated when I around people who aren’t financially wise (and not even trying to be) so I just do the best I can myself while finding more financially wise people to associate with.

miss.a.p1600
08-23-2022, 06:01 AM
I had to get clear with L again.

He brought up me paying half the rent to the therapist in a “hypothetical” situation. I gave him the coldest death glare he’s ever seen. And reiterated “If I pay any rent, I’m living by myself”

My pussy went into immediate lockdown just from that foolish ass statement.

Wtf do I need a man for I’d he is a man child, sugar baby, dead weight ?!? I refuse to put up with a man’s annoying quirks, help them take care of their kids, cook, clean, fuck on demand for free with no compensation

You got me all the way fucked up!! I’ll let Bertha have that role.

carmen_b
08-23-2022, 06:14 AM
^ I'm in this other stepmom spot and one lady was like " I'm paying 25% of the mortgage ( his mortgage ) . The dude thought it should be more.
UM .... NO .....
The guy and the kid/s take TIME.
Tell him next month you'll be coming in with LESS ( like more like 15% ) hahaha.

What is with men these days ?
Is there something in the food chemically castrating them or something ?

Sam38g
08-23-2022, 10:09 AM
^ I'm in this other stepmom spot and one lady was like " I'm paying 25% of the mortgage ( his mortgage ) . The dude thought it should be more.
UM .... NO .....
The guy and the kid/s take TIME.
Tell him next month you'll be coming in with LESS ( like more like 15% ) hahaha.

What is with men these days ?
Is there something in the food chemically castrating them or something ?

They all listen to other predators in the bars, gyms, in podcast telling them how to get over on us in every single way. How it is their right to take our youth, gas light us and abuse so they can brag to all their buddies. Their hook is to get us to fall in love with them and then start eroding our self confidence, slowly get us to want less while doing more of the cleaning, shopping, cooking and then for us to pay half the bills or more. Then say we are mothering or emasculating them which gives them the right to cheat.

carmen_b
08-23-2022, 10:11 AM
^ I'd say I'm safe from this. We use a housekeeper service every few weeks and he probably orders out or takes us to eat three times a week ha.
I cook a couple meals a week as a thank you to him. Sexy times are my contribution. To continue those he needs to make my life significantly easier ( and he does ) !

It ALSO really does take both people to " keep up " a house .... just things like declutter and cleaning basics take some time !
I enjoy my dude. I don't understand these guys asking women to pay 50% . It is so weird.

miss.a.p1600
08-23-2022, 01:31 PM
^the other “half” of the contribution…..I think men sneak it in in other ways (to indirectly get the woman to contribute her half or more) if they’re a closet 50/50 type dude

.