View Full Version : The Step Parent Corner …… rant, brag, shine, or cry here
smeca
11-27-2022, 05:25 AM
^I can't imagine having 2 kids in the house. I'm not about it at all this weekend. I won't moan but..Every day it makes me more sure I don't want any of my own lol
miss.a.p1600
11-27-2022, 06:23 AM
^at least with your own you have 100 percent control
smeca
11-27-2022, 06:32 AM
^yeah and 100% of the aggro, every day! Lol
miss.a.p1600
11-30-2022, 04:09 PM
I just notice L has the entire week off next week.
Most likely he will consult with his ex wife that he pays child support to on how he can further assist her lazy ass, coddle and overspend on his lazy kids for the holidays, while completely ignoring my needs and assisting me with this household I pay bills in.
Normally I would rage but I’m just going to continue to lock down the pussy n use that time to pack my shit while he is busy playing mr mom/getting reduced to an on-call manny by his ex-wife
I seriously hope this mf isn’t moving his kids in for the week he is off and instead will focus on being MASCULINE n providing in a new job while those kids stay with Bertha for the week.
He hasn’t said anything to me about his plans with his kids coming into my space.
Asshole.
Well I’ll be traveling so I won’t have to deal with them all weekend thank heavens I’ll have a break from his nonstop obligations.
I wonder should I require they clean up! I’m tired of his kids coming over and not cleaning to my specifications. (Ex if they use toilets and showers and stay longer than 24 hrs then they need to clean that in addition to their rooms)
Is this reasonable? Partially I don’t want to say anything bc I’m just gonna quietly leave his ass instead of constantly battling him and his kids to respect my boundaries of my space - but the last I want to do is travel then get back to a filthy house that they messed up?
Aurora_Sunset
11-30-2022, 07:19 PM
^^I think your requests for them to clean up are reasonable. I would say it's not really gonna do much to say you don't want him to have them over, since it is his house too and you won't be there to disturb. So, I wouldn't go so far as to demand that they not come over while you're gone. Like I said, I think the cleaning rules are reasonable - BUT, (from personal experience), you can ask all you want for there to be cleanliness rules while you are away so that you don't return to a dirty house, but they won't fucking listen. Mine don't.
I say just focus all your attention on how you'll be out of there soon, and try to let the rest just ride.
miss.a.p1600
12-03-2022, 01:37 PM
This is the first weekend I’ve had by myself in a long time.
Not having to deal with him or his kids for a weekend.
This is magnificent! I should travel more often.
miss.a.p1600
12-12-2022, 01:53 PM
So L’s kids are now only going to be here once a week GUARANTEED because L is working 2 jobs now.
Less nagging from him, less annoying kid behavior that I cannot check, more peace for me.
The heavens have answered my prayers!!!!
carmen_b
12-12-2022, 07:40 PM
^ I'm a little jealous. :)
Once a week is the perfect amount imo .
I feel like *if* anything happened with N ( and it might not due to other factors ) ..... he has his child two days a week.
I hope that even way into things he would freely give me a day a week off ha.
But I'm not sure I can stomach this situation ever again so there is also that.
I'm not sure a relationship will develop here either ....
I've mostly stayed out of this thread ( ptsd city lol ) !
Aurora_Sunset
12-13-2022, 07:40 AM
My husband and I finally sat down yesterday and did some very eye-opening money exercises and a budget. It made him finally realize WHY we struggle even though we make a certain amount of money. He agreed to a very strict food/eating out/entertainment budget for next year. But even cutting way back on that just makes up for the fact that we were already over-budget. Now, he wants to add more expensive rent and utilities on top of our already strained budget? When I plugged in the numbers for that, it put us even MORE over-budget, even with the other cuts.
Even with that, he's still claiming he wants to move and is "willing to do whatever it takes to make it happen."
I told him I want at least a week to think it over and reserve the right to declare that we stay where we are for another year. Because here's the thing: the way things are now, I am already the one pulling overtime all the time just to make up for the gap where we're already over-budget. He can say that he'll do whatever it takes to make up for the even bigger gap, but what does that entail? He just told me the other day that picking up overtime at his job isn't as simple as he thought it was because they're cutting back on OT. He said he'd find a second, part-time job, but I know what it's like to try to find a part-time job around a rotating night-shift schedule - I've tried with that EXACT schedule before - and no one wanted to work around my availability. He can say he'll "try," but he also "tried to find a new job" for over a year with no success before going back to school, which became another 18 months before he had a new job. Unless he can show me in the next week or 2 that he has a REAL plan to bring in more income by January, what will really happen is just that I have to continue to work OT, possibly even more than I do now, and I will have to get a second, part-time job because I have the more flexible schedule. Which will mean there's no way I'll be able to do school as well.
And what really irks me about it all is that, yes, I would LOVE to be in a house rather than an apartment. I also want more space and privacy. But the only reason he's so adamant about it is because of the kids. He wants more space for THEM. He wants more space FROM them when they're here. He wants to be a closer drive to them. I understand, but how is it fair to expect me to continuously shoulder a heavier financial burden and proceed to carry even MORE of the load just so HE can have the lifestyle HE wants with/for his kids?
I hate saying it like this, because I want our marriage to be a "team sport" in everything - but quite frankly, if his motivations for moving us into an even more expensive lifestyle than the one that we already can't currently afford without extra work, is all because of HIS kids, then HE needs to be the one putting in extra work to make up the income-expenditures gap. I don't know how many times I've heard him say "I'll get a second job" when I stress about money. Never seen him do a damn concrete thing about it, except put in maybe one application and then shrug when nobody called. Show me you're serious and can actually bring it in, or I can't approve this move and kill myself with work just so your kids can have a backyard 2 weekends a month.
carmen_b
12-13-2022, 08:30 AM
^ Well you know I agree with that.
I joined that professionally managed step mom support group and I'm on there all the time telling women that 50 / 50 bill splits are NOT fair when one person needs a large house and needs more groceries ect. because of their choices. I thought the counselors who manage it would take it down but they are up there in all their glory lol.
I think he makes more than you so you guys are not 50 / 50 per say but yeah ..... I think if he really is needing this larger space he needs to present a plan for it BEFORE doing it ( no forced scrambling for hours and side hustles ).
Plus .... they are there 4 days . They are FINE in the smaller space.
Answering fast , ha. I try to stay out of this thread !
miss.a.p1600
12-13-2022, 12:42 PM
^ I'm a little jealous. :)
Once a week is the perfect amount imo .
I feel like *if* anything happened with N ( and it might not due to other factors ) ..... he has his child two days a week.
I hope that even way into things he would freely give me a day a week off ha.
But I'm not sure I can stomach this situation ever again so there is also that.
I'm not sure a relationship will develop here either ....
I've mostly stayed out of this thread ( ptsd city lol ) !
Girl I been jealous you escaped ptsd city while I’m still trying to extract myself
im still having flashbacks (arguing for 3 hours with L over thinking his kids can come over and be exempt from clean after themselves) and I most likely be getting anxiety every weekend when they bust through the door talking loud as shit nonstop.
Once a week is golden. I feel so much less anxiety when the weekend hits cause I know I’ll get my well deserved day off after work before having to go right into having to deal with his endless obligations/my space and boundaries invaded after working 50+ hrs
These men are highly delusional thinking anyone wants to take on anything more without being highly compensated
miss.a.p1600
12-13-2022, 12:48 PM
Aurora I feel like men (just my experience dealing with L) will say they’ll do “anything” to get the family ahead but if they ain’t taking action towards that already there is a high risk of them just talking lip service and putting you in position to do it all or wait a long time while you nag for years and they complain you nag.
I sat here and nagged this mf for 2 years!!! Should have left him 2 years ago. Now he complains having to wait 2 weeks for sex.
Anyways
I’d draft a contract and have it notarized and pull sex off the table of goal isn’t met lol!!!! I’m ruthless when it comes to withdrawing pussy though…….
And it’s absolutely NOT fair for you to have to shoulder the burden of improving lifestyle for him n his kids. I agree he need to have a SOLID plan of ACTION on how he will improve the lifestyle for y’all without relying on you to cover for him because that’s something he should have the internal drive to do whether you’re there or not.
Aurora_Sunset
12-13-2022, 02:08 PM
I broke down the numbers for him further and told him that if we moved, 1) He would NEED to get a part-time job that brought in at least $400-500/month extra. And 2) He would need to be SUPER serious about sticking to our strict budget constraints. I said this included the money he blows on the kids. No more brand-name junk food at the store every time they come over. No random V-bucks for Fortnite or "just because" toys/video games every other weekend. They eat what we make or they get corn dogs/PB&J. No letting them go on multi-hundred dollar shopping sprees for their birthdays next year. I even told him we would have to be that household that is super stingy about electricity/heat/AC use.
I wrote a whole list of things that would HAVE to happen (for both of us, to be fair) in order to make the move feasible. I made it very clear that I was willing to do the things on this list, but he needed to understand that it was going to be a big sacrifice for everyone. That living like this meant very little savings for other goals for maybe a year-year and a half. We WILL be "house poor." Which he said he really doesn't want.... But he also really doesn't want to stay here.
I completely agree. I just want him to make his own decision, knowing exactly what I'm going to hold him to. He keeps getting like halfway through a job application for a part-time job or updating his resume, and then throwing his hands up and saying "I don't want to do this. I guess we're staying here." And then I'm like "Well, what don't you want to do? I'm telling you it's feasible but there are conditions that have to be met. Which is more important to YOU?" And then he waffles back into saying that he WANTS to move, but doesn't want to be house poor. It's like I can see the responsible adult part of his brain telling him that it makes a lot more sense to stay here another year in order to be more comfortable with spending and saving money. But he doesn't want to make that call - he wants ME to be the "bad guy" responsible adult that says "No, we're not moving."
carmen_b
12-13-2022, 02:39 PM
The waters fine out here. Literally.
I have plans to swim at 4 p.m. and then at 6 I'll go to dinner whatever I want lol.
In my old life on a Tues. I'd already be stressing because it meant his daughter has been there already either 1 or 2 days. Tues. always fell as visit day 2 or 3. On the 4 day weeks when it was day three ... anxiety land would be starting right about now .
Girl I been jealous you escaped ptsd city while I’m still trying to extract myself
im still having flashbacks (arguing for 3 hours with L over thinking his kids can come over and be exempt from clean after themselves) and I most likely be getting anxiety every weekend when they bust through the door talking loud as shit nonstop.
Once a week is golden. I feel so much less anxiety when the weekend hits cause I know I’ll get my well deserved day off after work before having to go right into having to deal with his endless obligations/my space and boundaries invaded after working 50+ hrs
These men are highly delusional thinking anyone wants to take on anything more without being highly compensated
Aurora_Sunset
12-13-2022, 06:17 PM
He called me from work to tell me that he already got an interview scheduled with a part-time gig, and also that he would feel a lot better staying where we are.
I'm honestly impressed (and a little turned on) at the responsible decision. I really expected him to push to move. I think in the past, he would have. I can honestly see certain ways that he's starting to click into a more responsible adult mindset who doesn't expect me to shoulder all the slack the last few months. I intend to praise him on this during therapy tomorrow lol
carmen_b
12-13-2022, 06:36 PM
There's nothing wrong with working the extra hours and STILL keeping bills low.
Save and have the rainy day fund for safety!
Aurora_Sunset
12-14-2022, 05:25 AM
^^Exactly what I told him!
I told him he should still get a part-time job as quickly as possible, I would still work as much as I can around school, and we should still stick to the super strict budget we would have if we had moved. Except, instead of just barely scraping by, we'll throw all the extra money into savings, so that in a year, maybe we can actually buy a starter home at least, rather than getting stuck in a rental doom spiral.
I think one more thing I need to impress upon him is that this means he still can't go "crazy" on himself or the kids buying extra shit this next year. I know a big reason he finally relented was because he was sad that he wouldn't have any extra money to "treat" the kids during the year, like V-bucks, video games, or birthday blowouts. I told him we could have a little more leeway for their birthdays since it is something he promised them long ago, but other than that, he still needs to reign in his frivolous spending on them. Staying here isn't an excuse to blow all our savings on treating them to more toys and crap because he feels "guilty" about not moving. If he really wants to upgrade to a house for them, then he needs to understand that means explaining a budget and sacrifices to them on a rudimentary level that they can understand. I'm not about putting our "financial worries" onto the kids, but it honestly does them no good to grow up thinking that anyone can buy anything at any time they want without having to make some tough choices and sacrifices occasionally. They need to understand that their mom and grandparents are very privileged, and the fact that we live a little more low-brow right now isn't due to lack of hard work. Some things just take time when you don't have generational wealth.
I don't know when he plans to break the news to bio-mom. I already warned him she's going to be a rancid, guilt-tripping bitch about it.
smeca
12-14-2022, 03:16 PM
Moan incoming. Bf getting daughter tomorrow. He has to work Sunday Monday though. I'm finishing work for Christmas on Friday, I'm soo mentally drained, I really not up for this. Also having her on Sunday. Gah, that's my lazy day.
Also I have a test to take in the city on Monday. I was going to make a day of it, but now I have to head straight home so she's not home alone all day. Unless he can take her to work and I pick her up when I'm done and drag her round the shops. I don't think it's appropriate though really, she'd have to be there about 4 hours. The test centre does not allow anyone inside to wait. Can she sit in the car in the car park for an hour? Lol
carmen_b
12-14-2022, 03:21 PM
omg this is giving ME anxiety ^
It's why I had a general " hour or two " only solo policy per week with just his daughter.
..... staying out of here for a bit or trying too lol
carmen_b
12-14-2022, 03:24 PM
I will say that I just had the JUICIEST MEATY conversation with N about the difficulties of step parenting.
He has done it too !
THREE kids ..... omg ....... now I'm like ........ this ex of his must have had a golden pussy or something I can just not imagine taking that on. I'll try to not think like that lol .
OUT OF SIGHT is out OF MIND.
Where I described my thing as " everyone mostly gets along " he admittedly his situation often had very TENSE moments .
He said he " tried his very best to be a great step and still came up feeling like I failed " .
I just can not believe he has gone through this too!
I was honest with him that a source of tension with J was my NEEDING breaks.
smeca
12-14-2022, 03:39 PM
^golden pussy LOL
OK he says she's fine to stay home while I make the trip out more worthwhile (the drive will probably take longer than the test) . He says she's independent at home. *shrug* fine . This is me trying to plan out everything when I don't have all the info. I should ask first (:
That's good N has perspective on how it is as a step parent. Interesting he said he felt he failed... i wonder if too many separated parents do things their way and their new partners just have to fit in.
smeca
12-14-2022, 03:42 PM
Oh half the issue is he tells me the schedule at some point ages ago, but will he write it on the calendar? I need shit on the calendar, my head is full lol
carmen_b
12-14-2022, 03:44 PM
If I remember ..... yours is 12 ? That is fine to be home 4-8 hours imo .
WELL in most situations. MY former partner will 99% probably helicopter to where the daughter is lacking independence at age 12 . He will probably cap her alone time at the house at 1-2 hours at 12! BUT .... not my problem any more !
carmen_b
12-14-2022, 10:20 PM
With N.... I saw him short notice Sunday ( I was ready for the concert and went over to see him instead ). Part of why I made that last min. choice was missing his touch.
I also looked cute for concert lol.
Now he is doing a short notice request tonight and I'm cutting it off at the knees. He needs to learn to plan ahead / ask for my time on the calendar. He won't get ANY more short notice time until a well planned outing is done first.
smeca
12-15-2022, 03:52 AM
Yeah she is 13 now.
He's gone to get her. It's so cold here atm, well into the negatives. I told him to make sure shes not wearing shorts like a few weeks ago (?!) . He said her mum says she is refusing to wear the warm coat her mum bought, only wearing the coat he bought (which is mainly waterproof but not warm enough for his freezing weather). Why are they like this?? :s
carmen_b
12-15-2022, 07:43 AM
^ Have you heard the term Nacho ?
Basically .... " Nacho Kid ? " ha.
Stuff like clothing .... food pickiness ..... I always Nacho.
miss.a.p1600
12-16-2022, 03:16 PM
If I remember ..... yours is 12 ? That is fine to be home 4-8 hours imo .
WELL in most situations. MY former partner will 99% probably helicopter to where the daughter is lacking independence at age 12 . He will probably cap her alone time at the house at 1-2 hours at 12! BUT .... not my problem any more !
Yeah with one kid especially a girl they won’t leave them home alone too long if at all
carmen_b
12-16-2022, 03:49 PM
^ Because heaven forbid they should learn to manage 4-6 hours of the day themselves.
miss.a.p1600
12-16-2022, 04:20 PM
Me personally- I’d rather have them dropped off with some trustworthy adult supervision than to be up in my house alone acting like they own the place/end up step grandparents/teen drug rehabs/etc
carmen_b
12-16-2022, 04:39 PM
^ I don't think it's a *great* idea to leave them 4-6 hours at age 10.
Maybe an hour.
( with access to a phone )
I meant at 12-13 years the 4-6 hours should be ok.
miss.a.p1600
12-16-2022, 08:45 PM
#ifitsbeyondmypaygradeitainthappening
#peacefulweekend
#soloadventure
#myhousemyrulesbitch
miss.a.p1600
12-17-2022, 12:19 AM
I can’t wait till I’m out of here so I won’t have to do anymore ducking and dodging hella obligations on my days off
miss.a.p1600
12-17-2022, 03:15 PM
Also L called me. I intentionally ignore his calls on possible kid pickup days JUST IN CASE him and Bertha have a last minute childcare crisis that I don’t feel like dealing with…..call ya family while I hit the ignore button on my phone so I can enjoy my peace
miss.a.p1600
12-18-2022, 09:01 AM
thank heavens they’re out!!!
miss.a.p1600
12-20-2022, 08:51 AM
I seriously can’t wait until him AND those kids have left this house.
I’m probably going to have to leave and make a solo trip somewhere (anywhere!) next weekend because I do NOT want to deal with this mf trying to double up and triple up the visitation.
Edit=thank heavens they’re out!!!
Now …. I need to figure a way to ditch them next weekend now that I know dude is planning to double up next weekend.
I may get a hotel or something because I absolutely refused to be locked in with him and his kids another holiday when their mother (and L’s dumb ass) thinks it’s acceptable to send her kids to my house EVERY fucking weekend/every cotdamn holiday - even Mother’s Day.
I am realizing I need my obligation-free weekends back. And I guess I’m going to have to pay for the luxury to be alone.
carmen_b
12-20-2022, 08:57 AM
^ Any family near you could stay with Sat. / Sun. ?
Because being with family is a definitely a " natural " type of excuse for the holiday ( which I'm assuming you mean at Dec. 24 and 25 ).
Speaking of ..... I personally am LOVING how it falls on Sat. / Sun. ! Can we move this shit to the weekend EVERY YEAR please ? I feel like people are carrying on this week with a normal work week instead of just having it all jacked .
miss.a.p1600
12-20-2022, 10:04 AM
Good point!!!
I just can’t wait till I don’t have to do all these mental gymnastics to get my needs met.
I’m willing to be single again so that I can get my house and peace and everything else back to myself
carmen_b
12-20-2022, 10:11 AM
^ I feel like even " splitting " it might be a good option.
Like ... the 24th ..... go to your own thing most of the day and then go to family house at 7 p.m. or so to visit with them.
Spend a few hours with family in morning and then return and do a few hours with him / kids.
I get the vibe L will have them ALL day the 24th and 25th which is fine ( it's the holidays ).
It doesn't mean you have to be there the entire time though. Then they can loaf the entire time ( which they will NEED to because things are closed ) ! It's probably the hardest days of the year to get L to take them out of the house for activities so why fight that ?
miss.a.p1600
12-20-2022, 12:51 PM
^youre super helpful in these solutions
You’re right he’s probably going to try to have them ALL weekend.
FML!!!
carmen_b
12-20-2022, 12:53 PM
^ Well if you are working the 24th maybe you can suggest they be out 4-6 hours of that work day ?
Such as he goes to family during that time AND takes them to see a movie. Movies are open the 24th and 25th !
miss.a.p1600
12-20-2022, 07:00 PM
Some step moms be like
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2007/mar/10/familyandrelationships.family1
miss.a.p1600
12-22-2022, 09:48 AM
I am REALLY dreading his kids coming here this weekend
I’m working overtime and the last thing I want to to be hassled by him to spend what little downtime I do have in a way HE thinks I should spend it/forced holiday obligations (aka being locked in with him and his kids who most likely will not go anywhere except lay around this house)/dealing with loud ass kids who don’t clean up after themselves
I can’t up and leave like I want bc I have to work.
I’m gonna need a ton of edibles to get through this holiday
Aurora_Sunset
12-22-2022, 12:56 PM
Bio-mom wants us to pick up the kids today instead of tomorrow because of the winter storm coming in. But it's not going to be nearly as bad by us as it is farther north or what they were predicting a week ago. She blew up both our phones all morning, even though my husband already fucking talked to her LAST NIGHT and told her no, we're not getting them tonight, he'll still come get them tomorrow. He called her back and told her AGAIN, and she sent a nasty-gram to both of us, first accusing us of "putting the kids' safety at risk." Like... if the roads are that bad first thing in the morning, we'll wait a few hours. They WILL clear the freeways 2 days before Christmas. Jeezus. Then she made a point to claim that she's taken off work plenty of times for the kids and we've never done it once.
First of all - yes, we both have taken off work. Secondly, you're the primary guardian, bitch. Which is what you WANTED and DEMANDED. Thirdly, you're salary. We're not. I literally cannot afford to not go in tomorrow just because she doesn't want to keep her damn kids a few extra hours for the roads to be cleared (if they're even that bad in the first place). She also commented that she "couldn't imagine that we're both going to work tonight and tomorrow morning in blizzard conditions." Well, unless the company shuts down, yes, we are.
Then, she said if we can't get them until Saturday, it will "break their hearts." Omg, they won't die because they had to wait a day. And they won't. If he can't get them in the morning, he'll get them by dinnertime. This isn't an all weekend storm.
She's acting as though 1) if he can't get to them at 9am, it'll be the end of the damn world if they have to wait until the afternoon for the roads to be safer, and 2) making sure the kids are here RIGHT WHEN THEY WANTED TO BE is more important than our paychecks. Sorry, it's not. She ended her bullshit with "the kids should come first." Them having a few extra hours over here doesn't come before me being able to pay rent.
Unless she wants to Venmo me $300, then sure, I'll take tomorrow off and go get her crotch-goblins now.
carmen_b
12-22-2022, 01:04 PM
^ Don't bite.
:)
A schedule is a schedule.
You can drive 15-25 mph in the storm if needed , ha.
" NO " is a complete answer.
Aurora_Sunset
12-22-2022, 01:13 PM
" NO " is a complete answer.
Precisely. What really pissed us both off is that she already asked about this last night. She was already told no. I fucking hate when she can't just accept the first answer she's given just because it's not what she wanted to hear.
We all know the real reason she wants the kids out of the house sooner is because her new boy toy is spending the weekend, and she probably wants him to come early. ::)
Aurora_Sunset
12-22-2022, 01:24 PM
I'm also starting to get wary of this new guy too. Apparently, he took the kids out a few days ago and took them shopping, dropping $100 on them.
Bro... why the fuck are you taking these already spoiled kids on a $100 shopping spree A WEEK BEFORE CHRISTMAS? Wtf? These damn kids already have too much shit.
miss.a.p1600
12-22-2022, 06:00 PM
Bio-mom wants us to pick up the kids today instead of tomorrow because of the winter storm coming in. But it's not going to be nearly as bad by us as it is farther north or what they were predicting a week ago. She blew up both our phones all morning, even though my husband already fucking talked to her LAST NIGHT and told her no, we're not getting them tonight, he'll still come get them tomorrow. He called her back and told her AGAIN, and she sent a nasty-gram to both of us, first accusing us of "putting the kids' safety at risk." Like... if the roads are that bad first thing in the morning, we'll wait a few hours. They WILL clear the freeways 2 days before Christmas. Jeezus. Then she made a point to claim that she's taken off work plenty of times for the kids and we've never done it once.
First of all - yes, we both have taken off work. Secondly, you're the primary guardian, bitch. Which is what you WANTED and DEMANDED. Thirdly, you're salary. We're not. I literally cannot afford to not go in tomorrow just because she doesn't want to keep her damn kids a few extra hours for the roads to be cleared (if they're even that bad in the first place). She also commented that she "couldn't imagine that we're both going to work tonight and tomorrow morning in blizzard conditions." Well, unless the company shuts down, yes, we are.
Then, she said if we can't get them until Saturday, it will "break their hearts." Omg, they won't die because they had to wait a day. And they won't. If he can't get them in the morning, he'll get them by dinnertime. This isn't an all weekend storm.
She's acting as though 1) if he can't get to them at 9am, it'll be the end of the damn world if they have to wait until the afternoon for the roads to be safer, and 2) making sure the kids are here RIGHT WHEN THEY WANTED TO BE is more important than our paychecks. Sorry, it's not. She ended her bullshit with "the kids should come first." Them having a few extra hours over here doesn't come before me being able to pay rent.
Unless she wants to Venmo me $300, then sure, I'll take tomorrow off and go get her crotch-goblins now.
Girl I’m in the same boat.
when I hear L talking about he might be off tomorrow I closed my pussy up and instantly went drier than styrofoam thinking those kids would be here a day earlier than expected
HELL NO!!!!
Hoe better attach some snow chains, a puffer coat, and a shot of whiskey and figure out how to get those kids in a blizzard cause I refuse to have my peace interrupted by being snowed in multiple days on end!!!!!!
miss.a.p1600
12-22-2022, 06:01 PM
I'm also starting to get wary of this new guy too. Apparently, he took the kids out a few days ago and took them shopping, dropping $100 on them.
Bro... why the fuck are you taking these already spoiled kids on a $100 shopping spree A WEEK BEFORE CHRISTMAS? Wtf? These damn kids already have too much shit.
less money you have to spend and you can save for yourself n your retirement
miss.a.p1600
12-22-2022, 06:36 PM
Bio-mom wants us to pick up the kids today instead of tomorrow because of the winter storm coming in. But it's not going to be nearly as bad by us as it is farther north or what they were predicting a week ago. She blew up both our phones all morning, even though my husband already fucking talked to her LAST NIGHT and told her no, we're not getting them tonight, he'll still come get them tomorrow. He called her back and told her AGAIN, and she sent a nasty-gram to both of us, first accusing us of "putting the kids' safety at risk." Like... if the roads are that bad first thing in the morning, we'll wait a few hours. They WILL clear the freeways 2 days before Christmas. Jeezus. Then she made a point to claim that she's taken off work plenty of times for the kids and we've never done it once.
First of all - yes, we both have taken off work. Secondly, you're the primary guardian, bitch. Which is what you WANTED and DEMANDED. Thirdly, you're salary. We're not. I literally cannot afford to not go in tomorrow just because she doesn't want to keep her damn kids a few extra hours for the roads to be cleared (if they're even that bad in the first place). She also commented that she "couldn't imagine that we're both going to work tonight and tomorrow morning in blizzard conditions." Well, unless the company shuts down, yes, we are.
Then, she said if we can't get them until Saturday, it will "break their hearts." Omg, they won't die because they had to wait a day. And they won't. If he can't get them in the morning, he'll get them by dinnertime. This isn't an all weekend storm.
She's acting as though 1) if he can't get to them at 9am, it'll be the end of the damn world if they have to wait until the afternoon for the roads to be safer, and 2) making sure the kids are here RIGHT WHEN THEY WANTED TO BE is more important than our paychecks. Sorry, it's not. She ended her bullshit with "the kids should come first." Them having a few extra hours over here doesn't come before me being able to pay rent.
Unless she wants to Venmo me $300, then sure, I'll take tomorrow off and go get her crotch-goblins now.
agreed.
kids can wait a couple hours.
that money and paycheck cannot.
typical Bertha manipulation tactics to try n force her sinister agenda.
miss.a.p1600
12-22-2022, 07:23 PM
Precisely. What really pissed us both off is that she already asked about this last night. She was already told no. I fucking hate when she can't just accept the first answer she's given just because it's not what she wanted to hear.
We all know the real reason she wants the kids out of the house sooner is because her new boy toy is spending the weekend, and she probably wants him to come early. ::)
i love how you and your husband are mostly on the same page about the visitation and he consults with you first.
Ls dumb ass needs to get a clue. But honestly at this point that fool is just digging his own grave into “guilty divorced dad singlehood”
some men just need to be single till their kids are 18 cause they’re pretty useless until then.