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carmen_b
07-16-2022, 06:52 PM
^ I would do the same. At the very least he could have told you 7-10 days ago he was considering adding an extra night and asked what you thought about hosting them for three nights.

Staci
07-16-2022, 07:11 PM
He also started paying her child support since she does have them more days. So my mindset is if you’re paying her since she has extra days then keep the agreements and stop letting those kids change the schedules on a whim which gives them too much control and creates instability and uncertainty.

Gotcha!

I've never been in that situation, but have a child of my own. I know how hard it is to do 24/7 when it's your own child. I can only imagine how hard it must be when they are someone else's children.

miss.a.p1600
07-16-2022, 07:23 PM
^the hard part about someone else children is feeling like you have no input and no control. For me at least it’s anxiety provoking.

Raising Kids is hard as it is. Let it be someone else’s kids.

They already come “pre-programed” by their bio parent and it feels like walking on eggshells if you make suggestions for improvement

If I had my choice AND all the available men had kids already, I’d chose infants (you can have more of a role in raising them) or seniors in high school (because they are on their way to independence)

carmen_b
07-16-2022, 08:19 PM
^ I’m struggling in the way you guys describe above.

If this were MY nearly 10 year old she would NOT be clinging to me during my business hours. She would be out being independent at least 5-6 hours during those days.

What I wish J would do is what I would tell my own family members to do.
I’m not biased giving different advice *here* vs what I would tell everyone !

carmen_b
07-16-2022, 08:23 PM
Also... the cat is out of the bag ( regarding the whole should I say anything about not having a date night scheduled ).

Of course I said something.
I can not seem to keep my mouth shut for 10 minutes if something is bothering me.

He was already on it. :)
He showed me come texts where he was working on setting the window up.

miss.a.p1600
07-17-2022, 06:59 AM
^ I’m struggling in the way you guys describe above.

If this were MY nearly 10 year old she would NOT be clinging to me during my business hours. She would be out being independent at least 5-6 hours during those days.

What I wish J would do is what I would tell my own family members to do.
I’m not biased in a sense of giving different advice *here* vs what I would tell everyone !

I’m the same way.

Seeing how L has coddled these kids, has no structured summer activities planned (besides clinging to him and me), doesn’t make them do chores, and multiple other serious nuisances of him and Berthas half-assed way of raising them makes me want to shake the shit out of them.

MY kid definitely would not be as needy, clingy, lazy, unrefined, etc as this.

It’s rough looking past all of this and is the prime reason I’m not getting more serious with him until he can make it worth my while to overlook this bs for another 10 years.

Aurora_Sunset
07-17-2022, 04:16 PM
Step-daughter was really good for about 6 weeks after I talked to her about boundaries and not taking things that aren't hers and wasting or ruining things. Then, yesterday, I got home and found out she wasted an entire roll of paper towels, taking them to her room and ripping them up; took my fairly new bottle of body wash AGAIN and squirted most of it into a bowl; and also took, tied a knot in, and hid my husband's honor cords from his graduation cap that he had already told her she could not have or play with when she asked about them Friday night.

I literally had to smack talk my husband into actually following through with our threat of punishing her. The entire punishment was just that she lost the TV in her bedroom for the rest of the day. That's it. That's not even that harsh of a punishment! She was still allowed to watch with us in the living room or watch Youtube videos on my husband's iPad. Like, my god, it was such a tame consequence. But you'd think I was recommending beating her for how hard my husband dragged his ass on actually doing it. He kept pushing off anything I said, and then tried to just offer to buy me a new body wash. I was like "I don't need you to buy me a new one." He was like "I will buy you a new one. There. Done." I was like, "How about you just discipline your daughter?" And his response was, "How about I just take care of it?" I asked if he was going to spend the rest of her life watching her cross boundaries, steal things, ruin things, and do shit she's not supposed to do and, instead of punishing her so she learns better, just pays off the people she harms, like a mob boss or some shit... That's exactly how rich, spoiled kids grow into rich, spoiled adults, because their rich mommy and daddy just throw money at everything. And we don't even have the money to pull that off!

He finally did it, and said he felt "so bad" while she was in her room for 30 minutes screaming and crying her head off. I was like I'm sorry, but this is the only way she learns. I honest to god wish she was the type of child who just listened when you tried to explain to her that she did something wrong and why she can't do something, but she's NOT. Whenever you try to lecture her or tell her she did something wrong, you can just SEE that there is nothing clicking in her brain. There is no level of shame or fear that she's going to face consequences. Multiple times, I have been right in the middle of a sentence explaining why what she did was wrong, and she'll just interrupt with a completely unrelated question like, "Can I play on your phone?" I mean... seriously... I'm in the middle of telling her she's in TROUBLE and she's just like "Yeah, ok, phone?" The child DOES. NOT. LEARN. until she actually experiences a consequence. But every time I've gotten my husband to actually follow through on his threats of punishment, she straightens up. She just knows, at this point, that 99% of the threats he makes are absolute horse shit because he almost never follows through on them, so she constantly pushes boundaries. I told him that I guarantee if she's this upset about losing her TV, she'll stop. He maybe will have to do it 2 or 3 times if it doesn't work this first time, but if he's consistent, she WILL stop. It's the only damn thing that gets through to her.

And like I said, it's not exactly like our punishments are truly harsh, in any capacity. For gods sake, she used to tell us that her stepdad would paddle her and lock her in a dark closet as punishment. Taking away a damn TV is some hippy-dippy shit compared to that.

carmen_b
07-17-2022, 05:42 PM
^ We have J's daughter pay for things she ruins .
She gets an allowance and if she ruins a $20 item ( her allowance is $10 a week ) she doesn't get any money for extras / little shopping things. I mean .... she has everything it's not like she *needs* the money but it does seem to work somewhat. I like the idea of handing it to THEM ( the one who ruined it ) and being like " you are fixing this now ".

I would talk to your hubby about what those items cost and what chores she is going to do to pay it back.

carmen_b
07-17-2022, 05:45 PM
The canoe adventure was a great success.
I honestly love how structured it makes the day haha.
It takes an hour to drive there, we were at the lake two hours, went to eat , and then an hour to drive back.
J seemed very pleased with it. He gave me a huge hug after his shower and mentioned we hadn't had a day like that ( all three of us ) in awhile. We hadn't. My dog did well in his shark outfit life preserver . He was a rescue fearful of EVERYTHING and wouldn't touch water at all for 3-4 years. Now he can boat without being terrified !

I stopped at my AirBnB to check on it after guests left this morning and we got a HUGE grocery haul of things they left behind.
There were some yummy items in there !

carmen_b
07-17-2022, 07:32 PM
I guess we got our window.
His sister from up north will take his daughter to my AirBnB tomorrow. :)
Fun sleepover for them. It's been 11 days since I've had a night alone with J.
I just looked back on the calendar and counted.

I'll be honest ..... I'm a little irritated with J that he didn't finalize this plan a couple of days ago.
It would have been a really good gesture given the difficult calendar.

Last night I told him I was disappointed in him for not telling his ex that his trip was 7 days ( he needed 6 for it ).
Dude ..... PLAN it better next time. He said that he didn't even think to do that !
We didn't had time to ourselves for three days before the trip and THEN you traveled for 6. That is NINE days already. You should have booked that FIRST day back for us. We shouldn't NEED TO be desperately begging family to take her for a night as our night together should have happened already the first day back. Oh well.

I see that I may need to ride J a bit more than I thought as far as planning ha. I would say that I *used* to fully trust him and I would always just back away and not get into his scheduling too much. The last 2-3 weeks ..... well ...... I'm not impressed as I have recently mentioned haha.

carmen_b
07-17-2022, 08:17 PM
^ This sister was very cute.
SHE'S preggo and just came over to announce it while we were all together !
J will be an Uncle !

Aurora_Sunset
07-18-2022, 04:49 AM
It's was nice that my stepson actively sought me out to spend time with me this weekend, but all he wants to do is watch those stupid Mario Youtube videos with him.... lawd, kill me lol

carmen_b
07-18-2022, 07:04 AM
^ Haha. You are sweet to watch with him.

carmen_b
07-18-2022, 07:08 AM
J and I get into this conversation about the huge to do lists we both have ( we procrastinated some life responsibility things ).
We revealed our " lists of shame " to each other lol .

Then he gets going on a couple things like " Well I didn't do my Dentist appt. yet because it's so hard to plan things when I don't know if I have daughter ect. "
Keep in mind ...... he always plans firmly like 3-4 weeks out.
I didn't SAY it but I'm sure my FACE said my thought which was " suppose you had this magic source of help ...... a summer activity perhaps ..... with exact hours you are free to do errands ".
It would be ........ magic !

carmen_b
07-18-2022, 09:16 AM
While I'm looking forward to this date night I'm still kind of offended that he didn't book that first day back in town for us or tell me THAT day ( the first day he was back which was Sat.) that he had the time frame carved out for us today.

Maybe I'm being too picky.
What do you guys think?

miss.a.p1600
07-18-2022, 09:56 AM
Step-daughter was really good for about 6 weeks after I talked to her about boundaries and not taking things that aren't hers and wasting or ruining things. Then, yesterday, I got home and found out she wasted an entire roll of paper towels, taking them to her room and ripping them up; took my fairly new bottle of body wash AGAIN and squirted most of it into a bowl; and also took, tied a knot in, and hid my husband's honor cords from his graduation cap that he had already told her she could not have or play with when she asked about them Friday night.

I literally had to smack talk my husband into actually following through with our threat of punishing her. The entire punishment was just that she lost the TV in her bedroom for the rest of the day. That's it. That's not even that harsh of a punishment! She was still allowed to watch with us in the living room or watch Youtube videos on my husband's iPad. Like, my god, it was such a tame consequence. But you'd think I was recommending beating her for how hard my husband dragged his ass on actually doing it. He kept pushing off anything I said, and then tried to just offer to buy me a new body wash. I was like "I don't need you to buy me a new one." He was like "I will buy you a new one. There. Done." I was like, "How about you just discipline your daughter?" And his response was, "How about I just take care of it?" I asked if he was going to spend the rest of her life watching her cross boundaries, steal things, ruin things, and do shit she's not supposed to do and, instead of punishing her so she learns better, just pays off the people she harms, like a mob boss or some shit... That's exactly how rich, spoiled kids grow into rich, spoiled adults, because their rich mommy and daddy just throw money at everything. And we don't even have the money to pull that off!

He finally did it, and said he felt "so bad" while she was in her room for 30 minutes screaming and crying her head off. I was like I'm sorry, but this is the only way she learns. I honest to god wish she was the type of child who just listened when you tried to explain to her that she did something wrong and why she can't do something, but she's NOT. Whenever you try to lecture her or tell her she did something wrong, you can just SEE that there is nothing clicking in her brain. There is no level of shame or fear that she's going to face consequences. Multiple times, I have been right in the middle of a sentence explaining why what she did was wrong, and she'll just interrupt with a completely unrelated question like, "Can I play on your phone?" I mean... seriously... I'm in the middle of telling her she's in TROUBLE and she's just like "Yeah, ok, phone?" The child DOES. NOT. LEARN. until she actually experiences a consequence. But every time I've gotten my husband to actually follow through on his threats of punishment, she straightens up. She just knows, at this point, that 99% of the threats he makes are absolute horse shit because he almost never follows through on them, so she constantly pushes boundaries. I told him that I guarantee if she's this upset about losing her TV, she'll stop. He maybe will have to do it 2 or 3 times if it doesn't work this first time, but if he's consistent, she WILL stop. It's the only damn thing that gets through to her.

And like I said, it's not exactly like our punishments are truly harsh, in any capacity. For gods sake, she used to tell us that her stepdad would paddle her and lock her in a dark closet as punishment. Taking away a damn TV is some hippy-dippy shit compared to that.

L does the same thing especially with his daughter.

The men seem to have real difficulties enforcing punishment, boundaries, on their daughters.

L’s daughter cannot handle the word NO! It’s really bad to the point where if there is something she wants him to do or buy she will literally harass tf out of him calling him nonstop, asking multiple times until she gets the answer she wants. Sometimes he will hang up on her or she will hang up on him. It’s ridiculous and unhealthy.

Also his kids break stuff all the time and he rushes to go buy them something new instead of teaching them to take better care of their stuff or punish them for being careless, holding them accountable and responsible for their actions.

His son has gotten 3 new phones in the last year. And I think they were purposely breaking their phones just to get brand new ones.

Its quite frustrating. Those kids are the epitome of loose boundaries and money pits.

miss.a.p1600
07-18-2022, 10:05 AM
Thank heavens L took his daughter back same day.

It wasn’t that bad because she entertained herself at her cousins house. And I did buy her a smoothie. I was adamant about going to a healthy restaurant and did not waste my money on food she probably wasn’t going to eat because her parents have pretty much enabled her to eat junk only.

Anyhow, my main grip is how her mom doesn’t put any nicer clothes on her nor does she do her hair so she looks like she just rolled out of bed and got dragged out the house. It’s one of the main reasons I’m reluctant to take her out in public and I feel bad because it’s not her fault it’s her trifling ass mom and maybe L’s fault too

Staci
07-18-2022, 11:32 AM
While I'm looking forward to this date night I'm still kind of offended that he didn't book that first day back in town for us or tell me THAT day ( the first day he was back which was Sat.) that he had the time frame carved out for us today.

Maybe I'm being too picky.
What do you guys think?
I think that having schedules locked down in advance is very important to you. You seem to have (or at least desire to have) almost every minute of the day not only planned - but planned well in advance.

I'm not saying that is right or wrong - but I don't know that it is as important to other people as it is to you, and therefore it is hard for others to understand the need.

carmen_b
07-18-2022, 11:37 AM
^ Thanks for your take.

I think I will let it slide this time because the calendar at least isn’t a complete pile of shit the next 7 days.
We get tonight to ourselves ( thanks J’s sister I owe you one lady ) , then J has her Tues and Wed, then we have Thurs, Fri., Sat., and Sun. to ourselves !! Now THAT I can do !!
The calendar finally isn’t just a pile of poop to step in lol!

We won’t face this situation again ( a trip for him ) until late Sept.!
He does have a business trip booked AND my one day in Sept I need to show up in person is during it ( boo ) BUT that is a long way off.

miss.a.p1600
07-19-2022, 04:25 AM
L has another day off this week.

Ugh!!!!! I’ll make sure either he is gone from the house or I am.

I will rage against him if he races to bring those kids back to this house instead of focusing on applying for higher paying jobs.

Aurora_Sunset
07-19-2022, 05:55 AM
I've asked my husband for weeks now to enforce a new rule about the kids cleaning their rooms on Sundays before they leave. I literally made it as easy as possible for everyone involved considering I'm at work. I said all I care about in regards to step-daughter's room is picking up the trash off the floor, which usually results in finding food pieces on the floor and cleaning those up so we don't get ants. All I want stepson to do is make sure all his dirty dishes are brought to the kitchen and to make his bed. I told my husband to just start making it a routine that after they shower that day, to have them get dressed and then spend 5 minutes with them in their room doing these simple tasks. I'm completely ignoring the fact that there's still toys and shit all over their floors. (It's also been over a month now since he swore he would help stepson clean and organize his Lego shit that's all over his floor, because I pointed out to him that I can't vacuum until he does). Right now, I just want the garbage and dirty dishes picked up, and I told my husband I want him to help stepson make his bed at the end of the weekend, because he has a tendency to have accidents and not tell us. Then, days go by until I go in there to tidy up and end up finding the pissed-soaked sheets and clothes he threw in his hamper.

My husband has not enforced this at all in the last 2 months I've been asking him to do it. So of course - what do I find today when I go in their rooms? Bunch of food and all those paper towels she used up all over stepdaughter's floor. And dirty dishes and piss-soaked sheets and clothes in stepson's room... My husband has been completely dismissive of the bed sheets thing, because the kid is on new medication that's supposed to keep him from having accidents at night. But guess what... Maybe just do what I ask and check the damn sheets. Does it really take that long or that much effort? I'd do it myself but he's still sleeping when I leave for work Sunday morning. At 10 years old, he should be making his bed anyway. It's always completely torn apart and strewn everywhere by the end of the weekend - probably cuz he tears them off his bed after peeing on them and not telling us.

carmen_b
07-19-2022, 07:26 AM
^ At 10 he needs to do ALL his own cleaning. This means even if your husband is watching him and telling him every step while he pretends not to know how.
He should be doing own laundry , declutter, bed making , ect. !
ALL of it.

If he pees from meds maybe the depends products ?
Easier to throw one away than remake a bed.

miss.a.p1600
07-19-2022, 08:41 AM
I agree with Carmen.

At 10 I’d have them assisting with chores. They’ll do it usually if you oversee and help with it too.

Ls kids make their beds up but I like them to vacuum, dust, and wash their bedding, and clean bathrooms (which I don’t mind helping with as long as they make a move and get it done)

Girl one day I was so fed up wirh L coddling them and enabling some sort of pampered kid privilege that I said “fuck him” and started giving orders to EVERYONE up in that house. No one leaves until the house is organized like it was before they arrived.

I refuse to be cleaning up after able bodied kids who are old enough to complete easy household tasks.

carmen_b
07-19-2022, 09:12 AM
Thanks for doing it " my way " J .........

They are out today 8a.m.-Noon doing things outside the house and tomorrow there is a 4 hour play date ( at the OTHER house ).
^ I'll be adding that into my play date notes lol.

J creating these windows of not crowding me has earned him some points ( insert eggplant emoji here ).

miss.a.p1600
07-19-2022, 09:16 AM
^yes! If men were less militant and hellbent on doing things their (inefficient) way……..they’d get a lot more play

miss.a.p1600
07-19-2022, 09:25 AM
Summer with divorced men with kids……….it’s rough!!!!!!!

Thankfully L is sticking to his 2 days a week still but the thought of when he’s off more than two days, stupidly tells his kids he’s off more than two days, and the pressure they put on him especially his son to linger around here more than two days brings me a lot of anxiety.

I’m also frustrated L seems to be immature af with finances splurging on dining out but won’t fill up the fridge when he sees it empty. I swear if I have to fill this fridge up he will be doing the cooking and cleaning.

I’m about one empty fridge away from pinging my sugar daddy

He FINALLY filled the fridge and freezer after I had to fake cry and blow him for 3 minutes.

Acting stupid like he didn’t know we were low in stock on everything “oh are we low on toilet paper…..teehee?”

Asshole!!! You gone permanently be low on sex and companionship you keep playing dumb.

I’ll play dumb too and have a 10 day period, fake headache and stomach ache, fake depression , and more.

I really think he has pushed me closer and closer to secret online sexwork/SD. Money which I will be spending on MYSELF/my exit plan.

I’m starting to really resent him

My therapy session won’t come soon enough.

Aurora_Sunset
07-19-2022, 09:58 AM
If he pees from meds maybe the depends products ?
Easier to throw one away than remake a bed.

It's not the meds making him pee, he just has always had problems with bed-wetting and he's on a new med to help him NOT pee. Which is my husband's reasoning for not bothering to check his sheets - he thinks he won't wet the bed anymore because of the meds. But obviously they aren't foolproof. I have my own opinions on why he's gotten away with wetting the bed for so long, but I tend to keep those to myself since everyone else wants to blame it strictly on him being autistic. But anyway.

He used to wear a pull-up to bed, but the problem is that he's so big now (way bigger than most 10 year olds) that even with the biggest size, if he wets himself, it still leaks out and gets all over the sheets. And now my husband won't even enforce him wearing one because they're both convinced the meds will take care of everything...::)

carmen_b
07-19-2022, 10:00 AM
I assume you've got a wet proof mattress cover on already ? I have those on all my AirBnB beds.
They make a slight crunch sound but save mattresses.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003PWNH4Q?maas=maas_adg_api_2133728670901_macro_1 _2&ref_=aa_2&aa_campaignid=14575208366&aa_adgroupid=129908784194&aa_creativeid=ad-544474719974_kwd-317765219217_dev-c_ext-&th=1

Aurora_Sunset
07-19-2022, 10:22 AM
Bio-mom is such a bitch.

She just texted my husband that she's on her way to the hospital with "extremely high blood pressure" and they say she "could have a stroke at any minute." Then, of course, went on for a whole paragraph about how if something happens to her, she wants us to give full custody of the kids to her parents. Because it's "What she wants, and what the kids would be happy with."

Just love how every time she thinks about dying, the ONLY thing she's concerned about is making sure it's known that her dying wish is that we DON'T have custody of the kids.

The thing is, if something were to happen to her now, from an objective perspective, yes, I could agree that the kids would be better off with their grandparents, at least for the next couple years as my husband gets situated in his new job and the kids get a little older to the point where we could trust them to get themselves off the bus and be home alone if we're at work. And from a personal perspective, no, I don't want the kids fulltime while we're still trying to build ourselves up career-and-finance wise. But I'm not giving her some blanket promise that we will ALWAYS agree to give custody to her parents, for the rest of the kids' lives. If something happened in 5 years, for instance, we'd probably be completely fine to take them. I'm willing to bet that if her parents were actually honest, they wouldn't want full custody of the kids for the next 11 years either. They're trying to enjoy their retirement.

I'm not saying I WANT this to happen and to become a full-time parent. It just pisses me off that she makes a statement like this about once a year. (Literally - this is at least the 3rd time I can think of her doing this). And, the thing is, I know it has nothing to do with her actually worrying about "what's best for the kids," it's purely just her ego of not wanting US to raise them. It's just her being a cunt. She wonders why we aren't more interested in being "friendly" and doing co-parenting with her, but she's CONSTANTLY telling us that her biggest fear in death is thinking that her children would, GOD FORBID, end up living with us. Like... you can't tell us all the time what incompetent, shitty parents you think we are, and then wonder why we have no interest in being super close co-parents lol. Also, she's so fearful of the kids living here, but she'll do everything in her power to send them over as often as possible. If we're so horrible, why you always trying to send them to us? LMFAO

Honestly, I'm sure nothing will happen. She exaggerates everything. She's never had blood pressure issues unless she's pregnant (and if she IS, unknown to us, there's no way she'd be far enough long to have pre-eclampsia). And she's 35 or 36. Not saying it couldn't happen, but I have a feeling she doesn't suddenly have such high blood pressure that she's about to stroke out. It's probably in the 140s because her dumbass is dehydrated. They'll give her some saline and send her home lol

ETA: I wonder if she just finds reasons every once in awhile to try to get my husband to agree to give custody to her parents if she dies, so she can use it as some sort of proof that he's admitting he's incapable of caring for them or something.

miss.a.p1600
07-20-2022, 04:55 AM
^shes really dumb.

The kids automatically go to the other parent (unless he has hella CPS calls or voluntarily relinquishes his parenting rights).

Obviously he’s not that bad of a parent if she’s never had to call CPS on him.

And why would you tell someone that? If that’s what she really intends, she would move in silence, then hit him with a lawsuit posthumously.

Now you know her intentions so keep a lawyer on deck!

miss.a.p1600
07-20-2022, 05:00 AM
He FINALLY filled the fridge and freezer after I had to fake cry and blow him for 3 minutes.

Acting stupid like he didn’t know we were low in stock on everything “oh are we low on toilet paper…..teehee?”

Asshole!!! You gone permanently be low on sex and companionship you keep playing dumb.

I’ll play dumb too and have a 10 day period, fake headache and stomach ache, fake depression , and more.

I really think he has pushed me closer and closer to secret online sexwork/SD. Money which I will be spending on MYSELF/my exit plan.

I’m starting to really resent him

My therapy session won’t come soon enough.

I did it.

I created an account online with pics added. I just need to get a dba and EIN to register for ONLYFANS.

LOL!!!

Mf took too cotdamn long (and STILL hemming and hawing over getting to the money) that ima get to MY money with or without his slow ass.

Raise enough so I can ditch him and his endless baggage

miss.a.p1600
07-20-2022, 05:06 AM
L has got to be the dumbest parent.

He is off today.

Joy! -*in my sarcastic voice*

I hope he stays out of my way. I will avoid him if he starts smothering.

But why tf does he keep telling his kids his off days. So of course they’re calling him nonstop begging to come to this house.

Boy you already hosted them here 2 days last week, gave your daughter an extra day. Now I need a break from the obligations. And better not see them until the next PLANNED parenting time.

I will rage if I hear “oh the kids coming over today”

NO take them OUT if you want your parenting time.

I think he’s maxed out at his kids and ex wife constantly asking him to spend money so if he is smart he will turn down their request.

But if he was smart he would have never told them he’s off work today. I’m halfway starting to think he’s mentally retarded.

carmen_b
07-20-2022, 08:21 AM
^ Good luck !

Why the hell is he off so much ?

Work 5 days a week L for fucks sake !

carmen_b
07-20-2022, 08:23 AM
I feel pretty miserable at this phase in the calendar. :/
The 6 days of J traveling and him not booking the first day back for US has got me riled up.
I'm going to have to ask him to not do that again .
I tried to not be picky and let it play out but it really hit a nerve with me.
He tried to offer some help ( sending daughter to the sleepover at my AirBnB with his sister ) but ..... " meh ".
He is also earning some points today setting up that playdate outside the house.
Since J and I work remotely we obviously will get a couple hours for us during it .

I caught a break in what I was dreading in the Sept. calendar.
I realized I was working with my client in the MORNING the day he flies out on his business trip and so it IS possible to join him on the next one. My client isn't in the MIDDLE of the trip like the last one. I shared that EXCITING news with him last night and then he mentioned his company is getting super strict lately with travel ( covid concerns as half their upper management got sick last week including his boss he was with every day ).
Now we are at a 50/50 of this 5 day Sept. trip being on .
I'm holding those other days open at this point .
I feel like us not traveling together ruined the last 10 days haha.

carmen_b
07-20-2022, 09:12 AM
^ Oh I should mention I get relief tomorrow .
We have four days of just us scheduled.

miss.a.p1600
07-20-2022, 02:25 PM
Thank heavens he is just taking them OUT

And getting his son a new iPhone just for doing the bare minimum.

Those kids won’t be able to successfully hack it in the real world

carmen_b
07-20-2022, 06:31 PM
Omg I have so HAD it .

I tried to escape for a movie and left a little too late ( J and I were cuddling on the couch ).
IF there wouldn't have been a line I would have been all good but there was like 20 people in line and it was moving slow!

I'm embarrassed now that I'm headed home lol.

On a bright note the play date OUT of the house was 6 hours.
He was like " at her friends " haha not letting me know WHICH right away for my notes hahaha ( as if a little detective work won't reveal the info ).

carmen_b
07-21-2022, 09:51 AM
Yesssss
The house is just OURS for 4 days ! :)
We made it ( barely ).

miss.a.p1600
07-21-2022, 11:32 AM
^Awesome!

L has a long workday. I love when he works late eves and I have early mornings. Less smothering and more i am able to deal with the other nuisances.

carmen_b
07-21-2022, 05:49 PM
J was on a weird kick this morning.
He wakes me up at 7:55 am so we can all stare at each other while buy spray guy wastes 30 min by showing up late.
I think he got salty when I declined the suggestion to take his daughter somewhere for 30 min. AFTER we all waited already !
Dude... cmon I am completely out of patience at this point . I’m starting my work day!

miss.a.p1600
07-22-2022, 12:55 PM
L just sprung his son on me AGAIN!

I knew he was off one day this weekend. And figured that was his parenting time.

His dumb ass said “oh I’m going to get my son tonight after work, is that okay, because my daughter has an all girls party Saturday?”

Um NO!!!

You’ve been known about this and I refuse to be inconvenienced last minute

I said let BERTHA drop him off TOMORROW……

I am glad he is ASKING instead of trying to tell me. But Fuck!

Bitch what part of 24hr minimum are you not understanding?!?

carmen_b
07-22-2022, 12:59 PM
Damn I loved waking up and having the house entirely to ourselves. :)

miss.a.p1600
07-22-2022, 01:04 PM
L just sprung his son on me AGAIN!

I knew he was off one day this weekend. And figured that was his parenting time.

His dumb ass said “oh I’m going to get my son tonight after work, is that okay, because my daughter has an all girls party Saturday?”

Um NO!!!

You’ve been known about this and I refuse to be inconvenienced last minute

I said let BERTHA drop him off TOMORROW……

I am glad he is ASKING instead of trying to tell me. But Fuck!

Bitch what part of 24hr minimum are you not understanding?!?

Everytime he inconvenience me, I’m pinging my sugar daddy.

Im going to stop answering his calls during the day. Because I’m tired of him catching me off guard and making me look like the bad guy

carmen_b
07-22-2022, 01:25 PM
^ He didn't stick to the " tell me all changes with 24 hours notice " and the two days a week thing? :(

carmen_b
07-22-2022, 01:26 PM
Ok ...... having an empty house I see I don't hate my life lol !
That was getting to be a close call. I have no idea how full time folks do it .
I hope we never need to cross the bridge because I literally couldn't cross it unless I had my own place nearby to go possibly.

miss.a.p1600
07-22-2022, 02:21 PM
Damn I loved waking up and having the house entirely to ourselves. :)

I LOVE an empty house.

miss.a.p1600
07-22-2022, 02:24 PM
^ He didn't stick to the " tell me all changes with 24 hours notice " and the two days a week thing? :(

Nope he’s defaulting back to his usual “when you have kids everything is spontaneous”

Um no bitch!

PLANNED parenting times less than 24 hours (and that’s generous) or I will rage/decline

Add to this is the fact HE will be at work so I will have to interrupt my day to take care of this kid.

Not playing with these mfs anymore.

What pisses me off to no end is how his ex wife and kids are planning this shit. Then he just figures he will tell me last minute.

I'm sorry but I should have input before these kids. THIS is why I can’t envision a future with him.

carmen_b
07-22-2022, 03:51 PM
^ Not ok.

miss.a.p1600
07-22-2022, 07:01 PM
Thank goodness Bertha doesn’t like her kids to be here when L isn’t here.

I don’t like it either. It’s beyond my pay grade.

She’s finally doing her job and sending her son to a relative.

He would have caught hell if he pulled up with his kid for last minute non-scheduled parenting and it wasn’t an emergency

miss.a.p1600
07-23-2022, 08:51 AM
Thank goodness Bertha doesn’t like her kids to be here when L isn’t here.

I don’t like it either. It’s beyond my pay grade.

She’s finally doing her job and sending her son to a relative.

He would have caught hell if he pulled up with his kid for last minute non-scheduled parenting and it wasn’t an emergency

Well I guess I spoke too soon. And I’m not taking L’s calls during the day anymore because it usually involves some sort of unplanned last minute childcare emergency

Next thing I know his son is ringing the doorbell and Bertha is nowhere to be found. Why is the bitch driving off before he gets inside? Why am I chilling in my pjs and having to interrupt my day?

These mfs couldn’t plan a damn parenting schedule if their lives depended on it.

His kid is here now. Bertha dropped him off and sped off.

Should have known this bitch would have no real plans lined up. She has no friends because she’s a cunt and neither does her son because she sticks him in his room for video games all day.

Anyways I’m calling my sugar daddy every time he fucks up. And working my way out of here.

Him and Bertha are both mentally retarded.