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View Full Version : You know you are a Stripper when.....



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Lola Rose
02-11-2007, 10:25 PM
when a pricy trip to the mall is no biggie, you just work an extra day or two the next week.

britt244
02-11-2007, 11:39 PM
dont know if this has been posted, but..

..when all your friends know you by a different name.

ive worked at 5 clubs and the ones i keep in touch with from each either use my stage name that i had there or my real name, so i answer to 3 different names :P i respond to my real name, brittany, and tessa.

redhothoney
02-12-2007, 01:08 AM
You know your a stripper when:
you have to wear sunglasses during the day, because your not used to seeing the sun.
you have yet to figure out how to get the smoke smell out of your hair, especially when your hair still looks perfect! you know how your hair smells when 100 people are smoking at one time...
you keep nail glue in your purse.
you check out the news just to make sure none of the clubs you work at caught on fire or got busted.
you watch america's most wanted to see if you recognize any of the criminals jk!
you check the weather to see if it's going to be raining money haha.

dawnr1101
03-01-2007, 10:21 PM
This list is great!!!

verfolgung
03-12-2007, 10:33 AM
... As April 15th draws closer, you know there are certain customers who you won't see until after they get their refund checks from the IRS.

ExoticEngineer
03-12-2007, 10:56 AM
You know your a stripper when:
you have to wear sunglasses during the day, because your not used to seeing the sun.
you have yet to figure out how to get the smoke smell out of your hair, especially when your hair still looks perfect! you know how your hair smells when 100 people are smoking at one time...
you keep nail glue in your purse.
you check out the news just to make sure none of the clubs you work at caught on fire or got busted.
you watch america's most wanted to see if you recognize any of the criminals jk!
you check the weather to see if it's going to be raining money haha.

Oh, that one made me laugh and cry all at once!

zoe jane
03-12-2007, 11:57 AM
you know your a stripper when no one knows you by your real name any more!!

ExoticEngineer
03-12-2007, 12:04 PM
When you know exactly how to get glitter out of your eye without the world coming to an end.

You can change your underwear, wearing platform heels and smoking a cig in under 10 seconds, and NOT break an ankle!

You have an accute sense of when 2.5 minutes have passed.

Gypsy14
03-12-2007, 12:07 PM
How do you get glitter out of your eye without the world coming to an end???!!!!

Lola Rose
03-12-2007, 02:41 PM
You use a very slightly damp qtip and remember to breathe! ^

LuckiCharm
03-12-2007, 02:53 PM
When you don't do any drugs, but you always know where to get the best shit.

:rotfl: :rotfl:

spoiledpet
03-12-2007, 07:30 PM
when you have to have a serious discussion with your SO about definitions for "yesterday", "today" and "tomorrow" so that you can get your schedules back in sync.

Slim_C
03-12-2007, 10:49 PM
When you are standing in the kitchen, cooking, and you find yourself clapping your booty unconsciously

cameronfl
03-13-2007, 08:31 AM
you watch america's most wanted to see if you recognize any of the criminals jk!


In that idea....when you flip through the adult trade mags(the free glossys advertising strip clubs and escorts) to see which of your former co-workers are now advertising as escorts

ExoticEngineer
03-13-2007, 12:31 PM
When you are standing in the kitchen, cooking, and you find yourself clapping your booty unconsciously

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Oh I have done this!!!!! Hahahaha! And have been busted many times for it too!

krchab99
03-30-2007, 10:23 AM
I had to bring this thread back becuse i had one of these moments to day it was this....you know you are a stripper when you are standing in the nail salon wondering how that nail polish will effect your money and how it will glow under the black light. :)

kryssy
03-30-2007, 11:59 AM
when you constantly put your body in pain because you need/want the money

Windy
03-30-2007, 03:19 PM
when you just leave your sequin garter at home because your it's your kittens new favorite toy :)

crawling on your knees dont hurt at all anymore.

someone grabs your butt as you walk by, n you turn back fast ready to slap someone's face, when you see that it was just one of your fellow strippers, as she walks by giggling.

you have dreams of dancing in strange clubs uve never seen before n everything goes wrong...or..everything goes right ;)

Lysondra
03-30-2007, 05:16 PM
when you just leave your sequin garter at home because your it's your kittens new favorite toy :)

crawling on your knees dont hurt at all anymore.

someone grabs your butt as you walk by, n you turn back fast ready to slap someone's face, when you see that it was just one of your fellow strippers, as she walks by giggling.

you have dreams of dancing in strange clubs uve never seen before n everything goes wrong...or..everything goes right ;)

When your dog's favourite toy is your one dollar notes and you figure he can have 'em 'cause 'it's only one dollar'.

Yekhefah
03-30-2007, 05:21 PM
^^^ Where are you getting one dollar notes? ;)

You know you're a stripper/dominatrix when someone asks you what your name is and you have to think about it. This happened to me the other night - I was out with friends and met a new person, and I almost said I was Ariella, then I stopped myself and started to say Lily, then remembered my real name! (I use Ariella at the dungeon and Lily for stripping.)

Lysondra
03-30-2007, 05:23 PM
^ It happened to a friend in America... she had pictures of her dog chewing up the ones she brought home. Hahaha. :)

Although the other day I found $200 in fifties in the corner of the seat of my car... and for the life of me I couldn't remember ever losing $200...

Yekhefah
03-30-2007, 05:24 PM
Yeah, it's official, I hate you now. :P

blayze
03-30-2007, 08:11 PM
when your friend brags about how much money her new boyfriend has(and yeah, he's LOADED), and not only are you not impressed, but you then tell her how her BFs BOSS (whos even MORE loaded) came in to see you at the SC a few nights ago and dropped a few grand on you.

LatinaRose
03-30-2007, 08:45 PM
When you are standing in the kitchen, cooking, and you find yourself clapping your booty unconsciously


:rotfl: Yeah, I do that all the time!!!!

Minette
03-31-2007, 12:10 AM
[QUOTE=ExoticEngineer;1000640]When you know exactly how to get glitter out of your eye without the world coming to an end.
[QUOTE]

And you can do it during a lap dance without the customer ever knowing!

hannah83
03-31-2007, 09:46 AM
You know you're a stripper/dominatrix when someone asks you what your name is and you have to think about it. This happened to me the other night - I was out with friends and met a new person, and I almost said I was Ariella, then I stopped myself and started to say Lily, then remembered my real name! (I use Ariella at the dungeon and Lily for stripping.)

haha this happened to me just the other day. me and my best friend were at a pajama party hosted by a local radio station. when the dj asked her what her name was she responded with her stage name, which threw me off a little bit. Right as I'm trying to debate what name I should give, he turned to me and asked what my name was.

*awkward pause* "Hannah."

my friends in the room were laughing at me because they knew I just gave out my stage name. I was sooo embarassed.

Roulette
04-01-2007, 08:47 PM
when you read the comments on this thread and think say to yourself "oh god - that's happened to me - I dont want to read anymore - these are true" (on of my best friends earlier today)

ExoticEngineer
04-03-2007, 03:25 AM
When you have a black light in your room, and it's NOT for getting freaky with your hunny! ;)

Windy
04-03-2007, 03:28 AM
haha this happened to me just the other day. me and my best friend were at a pajama party hosted by a local radio station. when the dj asked her what her name was she responded with her stage name, which threw me off a little bit. Right as I'm trying to debate what name I should give, he turned to me and asked what my name was.

*awkward pause* "Hannah."

my friends in the room were laughing at me because they knew I just gave out my stage name. I was sooo embarassed.

haha. i know when i meet new people OTC, theyll ask me my name. ill pause..and say my name like a lightbulb just lit up in my head. probably think im lying - because, who really pauses when you ask someone theire name, right?

but its like at the club im so used to my stage name haha , and ill say it just like *that*

Amelia
04-03-2007, 09:37 PM
When you walk past the children's school uniform section and think, "Work clothes!"

Yess!

Tart
04-04-2007, 02:08 AM
^ hahaah.

But the pausing to say your name... Yah I do that shit a lot. Its worse when you are meeting your bfs friends and they are like " oh hey im bob..you are .. "

and I have to for real sit and think about it for like a split second..

They probably think im either on drugs or fucking stupid

PookaShell
04-04-2007, 02:16 AM
This is like saying "you know you are a teacher when you are teaching kids...." or "you know you are a plumber when you are fixing toilets"

Anyway, it's just the way the job is. In every job there are people who find it and then there are the jobs that find them.


Haha. This is such an old post...but this seriously had me rolling around laughing, Emily.

PleasureVictim
04-10-2007, 05:01 AM
dont know if this has been posted, but..

..when all your friends know you by a different name.

ive worked at 5 clubs and the ones i keep in touch with from each either use my stage name that i had there or my real name, so i answer to 3 different names :P i respond to my real name, brittany, and tessa.

Good one- I know all about this!;D

DancerNTampa
04-10-2007, 05:51 AM
You know you are a stripper when ....

When the check out guy hands you your change from the groceries and you try to take it in between your breasts by squeezing them together with your hands!!!


LMFAO!!!

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

icey
04-10-2007, 08:18 AM
I know I am a stripper when I am out with my friends at a night club dancing, and I am still getting dollars. :D

Bella21
04-11-2007, 08:30 AM
I love when this thread gets bumped!!

... when your friends get drunk and say, "Let's go to a strip club!" and you WANT to go because it will be fun and you're drunk. But, you know SOMEONE will probably recognized you at any given club in town and then everyone will want to know why they're calling you "Bella".

... when you've been living in your place for about a year and your family STILL hasn't seen it because that would mean having to go over the place with a fine-toothed comb and hide all the evidence (i.e. the pole, the shoes, etc.)

Picaresque
04-11-2007, 08:57 AM
when you know 1 phrase in spanish: wanna dance, it's 20$

You need one more (unless your club allows two-way contact): "no puedes tocar!" 8)

Gypsy14
04-11-2007, 11:50 AM
... when your friends get drunk and say, "Let's go to a strip club!" and you WANT to go because it will be fun and you're drunk. But, you know SOMEONE will probably recognized you at any given club in town and then everyone will want to know why they're calling you "Bella".

... when you've been living in your place for about a year and your family STILL hasn't seen it because that would mean having to go over the place with a fine-toothed comb and hide all the evidence (i.e. the pole, the shoes, etc.)

Both of these are soooo true for me! I've worked at different clubs all over the city (with a few different names!) and I really can't go as a customer without struggling over what name to give out... I always get recognized! And inevitably, my friends slip up and call me by my real name!
And yeah, there's NO way my parents can come for a visit!!

britt244
04-11-2007, 11:57 AM
^^ haha, my friend waitresses at a diff club by me, and she came to see me at work and kept asking for me by my real name because she was wasted and she ended up arguing with the bouncer because she insisted she knew i was there and he was telling her he didnt know anybody by that name.

anomar
04-11-2007, 12:33 PM
Sometimes I'll be at the grocery shop and swearing sweats and running errands and suddenly I'll see some attractive guy or think about good sex and I can just FEEL these sudden, unannounced bedroom eyes shoot out of my face and confuse the person next to me. :D

TigersMilk
04-20-2007, 07:08 PM
..When youre out somewhere wondering to yourself if you know that old creepy man in a business suit giving you odd stares or not from the job.

ExoticEngineer
04-20-2007, 07:12 PM
Ahhhggg! I hate this one! ^^^^^^^

Lysondra
04-20-2007, 10:57 PM
..When youre out somewhere wondering to yourself if you know that old creepy man in a business suit giving you odd stares or not from the job.

Or when you see an old creepy guy in a business suit and go, "Hmm.. $300.. no no wait.. $400.. I could DEFINITELY make $400 off him."

Nameless
04-21-2007, 08:51 AM
you have to unfold your creased money in the check out line of the grocery story, while getting strange looks.

JadeBrooklyn
04-21-2007, 10:02 AM
Your money smells of perfume and it's all ones.

cherry_sin
04-21-2007, 03:31 PM
You leave the club and go to Walmart to do some after work munchies shopping, and take like ten minutes cramming ones into the little slot at the self checkout, just so you don't have to talk to anyone (because of course, you are still in your fake lashes).

holiday
04-21-2007, 08:55 PM
You visit a strip club as a patron and it KILLS you to see a nicely dressed man sitting alone, scanning the room, waiting for a dancer to come over and sell him dances but none of them do and the money in his wallet is just calling to you.

Minette
04-22-2007, 11:18 AM
When people ask you how old you are, and you have to pause and think about it for a second, because you lie about it at work.

Kaylinn
04-22-2007, 11:28 AM
When wearing 7 inch heels is more comfortable than 2 inch heels.

When you go to Walmart to "restock" Glitter, false eyelashes, lotion, baby wipes, fake tanner, some really cute cheap eyeshadow colors, hair pills. Make sure you save the reciept for the tax write off.

You know your a stripper when you walk into a car dealership, lookin smokin hot, say I want THAT car. Sales man says, ok lets go inside and talk about financing, and you say, Oh no..its cash!
And you think to yourself...wow, This car only took me 700 lapdances to pay for!

Windy
04-22-2007, 04:10 PM
haha minette - tis true!

and yeah kaylinn...7 inchers are way more comfortable than 2 inchers for some reason!

you know you're a stripper when you try not to flaunt yer cash in front of yer parents because you told them your a receptionist who get paids 8.50 an hour.

you know you're a stripper when you get upset when your cats find yer dollar bag that u havent bother to count yet, n they make a huge mess of it.

you know you're a stripper when you find yourself brushing off every young guy who hits on you at a normal nightclub, because u feel like you're at work n they are just guys with no money.