View Full Version : You know you are a Stripper when.....
anomar
04-22-2007, 07:10 PM
you know you're a stripper when you find yourself brushing off every young guy who hits on you at a normal nightclub, because u feel like you're at work n they are just guys with no money.
This is the best because it's totally a perk of being a stripper... it's like, whenever I want to hit up a bar with some girlfriends, I just go out with them and I rock it like I'm the coolest girl in a bar filled with PLs. :P
No one EVER gets to 'holler at me', irl or itc.
Lysondra
04-22-2007, 07:22 PM
I went shopping last night and saw a guy in a really well-tailored suit and went, "Fuck, if only he was in the club!"
Then I thought I should hustle him anyway because I might be able to get a fancy french dinner.
You know you're a stripper when you hustle everyone, not just customers.
Hey, can someone get me a coke? pleaaaase?
krchab99
04-23-2007, 11:50 AM
^^ so true lilth. I have to bite my toung at the smoothie bar at the gym becuse i am postive I could hustle a free protien shake from some unsuspecting muscle dude. lol
BaileyBanksNBiddle
04-23-2007, 05:05 PM
You know your a stripper when....
....you start fondling your breasts in public without realizing it.
....you tip the server at breakfast more than the bill.
....breakfast is at 3:30 a.m. bedtime is at 5:00 a.m.
manchester
04-24-2007, 05:17 PM
you know you're a stripper when daylight saving in spring time comes around and you get all excited because it's the first time you've seen sunlight in 7 months.
manchester
04-24-2007, 05:41 PM
oh, oh, oh,
when you have 3 names:
your fake name
your real name
and your fake real name.
ViolaStrings
04-24-2007, 05:56 PM
You know you're a stripper when you get excited to get a new set of acrylics. This time, you brought your own topcoat, and your nails won't glow in the black light anymore.
Picaresque
04-24-2007, 06:07 PM
when you're in class, in line at the store, or in public anywhere...and all of a sudden you look at some random guy and the thought pops into your head: "I wonder if he went to an SC last night?"
Minette
04-24-2007, 11:10 PM
[QUOTE=BaileyBanksNBiddle;1052629]You know your a stripper when....
....you start fondling your breasts in public without realizing it.
QUOTE]
I was just talking to someone about this yesterday, and had my hands on my tits for a good portion of the conversation. ::)
Fahren
05-01-2007, 11:28 AM
When you are on a date at a regular bar, and you start randomly dancing with other guys, then you hop on the pool table and spread your legs and clap your shoes.
krchab99
05-01-2007, 11:35 AM
^^^lol thats funny but at a real i find myself scouting the guys for who i think will spend. lol
MoetATL07
05-02-2007, 08:18 AM
You hear a song on the radio and instantly think "how could I work this on stage".
LuckiCharm
05-02-2007, 08:36 AM
... when you've been living in your place for about a year and your family STILL hasn't seen it because that would mean having to go over the place with a fine-toothed comb and hide all the evidence (i.e. the pole, the shoes, etc.)
Oh My Gosh!!!!! That is SO ME!!!!
Lmao!!!!
papillonluvr
05-02-2007, 08:04 PM
You hear a song on the radio and instantly think "how could I work this on stage".
lmao. I find myself doing this still even though Ive been outta work for like 3-4 months!
Does it ever go away?
Lysondra
05-02-2007, 08:10 PM
You can afford $1000 in emergency car repairs.
:angry:
*kicks car*
You know your a stripper when you can wipe your nose on a total strangers shirt several times a year, and laugh about it with your friends...... ah, the good life.
ChristyWild
05-07-2007, 09:48 AM
You hear a song on the radio and instantly think "how could I work this on stage".
OMG! I do this all the time...or there are songs I like and can't play at work cuz they're too slow. :(
:rotfl: :rotfl: This actually happened to me....SO EMBARASSING!!! You know you're a stripper when... you go the Doctor's for a physical and when he tells you to bend over and touch your toes, you turn around...put your ass right to his face and bend over and touch your toes thinking nothing of it...until he clears his throat and says to you...."Um... ma'am, could you please face me?" Luckily he was the only Doctor in there....LOL! :rotfl: :rotfl: DDdddddeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UH....Sorry, Doc!!!!!!!!
Stripper in Training
05-07-2007, 04:34 PM
Its nothng to see your girl in the dressing room talking about how she financed her new boob job
dawnr1101
05-09-2007, 02:46 PM
lmao. I find myself doing this still even though Ive been outta work for like 3-4 months!
Does it ever go away?
No...I stopped dancing 7 years ago and I still do it...(hazards of the business);D
PrettyCurlieQ
05-09-2007, 02:50 PM
You know you're a stripper when you get excited to get a new set of acrylics. This time, you brought your own topcoat, and your nails won't glow in the black light anymore.
I don't trust myself w/ nail polish anymore..not even for my toes!! :D
ChubbyChaser
05-09-2007, 03:08 PM
You're so used to your stripper shoes that you've forgotten your real height :)
Minette
05-10-2007, 04:41 PM
You put on some two-inch heels and walking in them feels funny. You can't figure out why until you realize it's because they're too low!
cameron_keys
05-10-2007, 07:32 PM
When all your "conservative" clothes you wear out with friends are still hootchie mama!
I"ve found I have 3 distinct wardrobes...
1)old super conservative suits that I'll never wear again(because I refuse to work for a corporation again) and will likely donate soon.
2)frumpy old clothes..sweats and the like that are only good for lounging at home..but DAMN so comfy adn
3) stripper clothes. Stripper clothes I wear to work...Stripper clothes I wear AT work... even when i go out my jeans are LOW slung, tight and ripped up..tops are sexy(some slutty) and most could(and some have)been work on stage.
LuckiCharm
05-11-2007, 11:03 AM
You know you're a stripper when you have ever worn a garter as a headband because you couldn't find a real one.
You know you're a stripper when you look in the underwear section for work clothes.
cameron_keys
05-11-2007, 11:16 AM
You know you're a stripper when 4 inch heels feel like flats
Kaiyla
05-11-2007, 04:54 PM
^^^^so true. And barefoot just feel "stunted."
When you run into a bouncer/dj/guy from work outside of work and it's like he's shrunk 8 inches overnight.
Windy
05-12-2007, 10:23 AM
When you hear other friends describing their night out with their "co-workers" or "collaegues"
you call everyone you work with "the girls"
lgrant98001
05-13-2007, 02:20 AM
You know you're a stripper when...
You're a Black Stripper from Philly, you request "Brickhouse" from the DJ, and get pissed when he plays the Commodores instead of the Rob Zombie version!
One of my favorite songs. I didn't know about the Rob Zombie version...so I picked up a copy and I love it! Thanks for mentioning it....
Lynn
Lysondra
05-13-2007, 02:49 AM
When you hear other friends describing their night out with their "co-workers" or "collaegues"
you call everyone you work with "the girls"
I keep doing this *headdesk* *headdesk*
It's the one thing that really gives me away.
'Don't you work with any men?'
Uhhhhhhh.
Indira
05-16-2007, 01:24 PM
....nothing can put you in the mood for going to work better than a new outfit.
....you play name that tune with the DJ and the joy you feel when he tells you the name of the song and that he has the CD .......the shit out of luck feeling when he tells you that somone else already dances to it.
.....1 or 2 extra lbs mean the difference between telling the DJ give me LOW LIGHTS or telling him do my lights however...
.....when at the end of the night, and a few beers to many, you dig for 10 minutes in your dance bag trying to find your underwear...only to say fuck it and wear your g-string home.
....the relief you feel when the girl that is on stage in front of you is dancing to a long set. You have just enough time to go pee and touch up your lipstick.
....how bad it sucks when you don't have enough time to pee before you go on stage and it hurts to suck in your stomach 'cause your bladder is soo full.
....roll out of bed, spend the first 15 minutes unwadding and sorting in to piles of 10, all around you, all your stage money from the night before,cursing yourself for not doing it the night before and changing it for bigger bills, because now you have to go shopping with a huge wad of one dollar bills.
burnedrose
05-16-2007, 02:16 PM
...when you think nothing of the neighbors seeing you hanging your laundry outside...naked.
...when you have random people live vicariously through you ("Omg, I so wanted to be a stripper..tell me what its like? do you make money? is it fun? can I be you?")
Windy
05-17-2007, 01:23 PM
...when you think nothing of the neighbors seeing you hanging your laundry outside...naked.
...when you have random people live vicariously through you ("Omg, I so wanted to be a stripper..tell me what its like? do you make money? is it fun? can I be you?")
LOL. yea its like i have sparkly tie thongs hanging out to dry...lol.
and yea when i tell random girls who ask what i do, theyre like "ommmggg! u must be like, so brave! i could never do that! like, how much money do you make??? )
haha
cinammonkisses
05-17-2007, 01:43 PM
I went shopping last night and saw a guy in a really well-tailored suit and went, "Fuck, if only he was in the club!"
I do the same thing. When I'm walking down the street and I notice guys checking me out, stopping to try to talk to me (these are white-collar men too) all I can think about is "dam why didn't I meet you at work"
cinammonkisses
05-17-2007, 05:59 PM
You know you're a stripper when...
You're a Black Stripper from Philly, you request "Brickhouse" from the DJ, and get pissed when he plays the Commodores instead of the Rob Zombie version!
Which version? 2003 or the one w/ Lionel Richie and Trina?
Brandon BabyDoll
05-17-2007, 07:34 PM
...when you think nothing of the neighbors seeing you hanging your laundry outside...naked.
lol so true
Miss_Bee
05-17-2007, 07:48 PM
You know your a stripper when....
....you start fondling your breasts in public without realizing it.I've only been doing it for 3 weeks and that's the BIGGEST thing I've noticed.
I find myself rubbing my assets while shopping :-[
mercedez
05-22-2007, 07:31 PM
lmao. I find myself doing this still even though Ive been outta work for like 3-4 months!
Does it ever go away?
No...its been over a year since I quit....and I keep doing that!!
Sayan
05-23-2007, 06:05 AM
1.You know you are a stripper when...hearing the word "V.I.P room" makes you smile and excited even if you are not at the stripclub !:O
2. when you hear a song you like and automatically imagine choregraphy for a stage show wile doing your groceries:P
3.When feeling naked when you don't have that pile of cash on you at all time.../:O
4. when you regularly shop for plastic surgeon names even if your are in absolutely NO need of plastic surgery::)
cameron_keys
05-23-2007, 09:01 AM
When sipping champagne feels like an accomplishment...not just a beverage!
needtodance
05-24-2007, 08:48 AM
When you go to a myspace profile, and your first thought isn't "Wow, my sister finally got a myspace, I wonder how she's been! niiice graphics on the profile" but its "DAMMIT not this song i HATE dancing to this song! This isn't a happy song!"
Windy
05-26-2007, 12:05 AM
You know you're a stripper when you realize that BEFORE you danced, you let random guys outside of the club who are trying to pick you up TALK YOUR EAR OFF n you just stood there, giggled, was polite and tried to "leave" but he just kept talking and you did nothing!
Now after practicing of the weeding out of the time wasters n men who jus ramble on n dont spend any money, you know how to cut off un-needed conversation just like THAT.
nikita
08-08-2007, 09:30 AM
Funny thing. One of my guy friends post a consolidated list that from this thread on Myspace. Apperently this has made it's way around the internet.
Taylorlila
08-08-2007, 11:21 AM
...when your bf takes a picture of you by the computer, and stripperweb is on the monitor.
...when you have to find a new nail tech. because the one you used before you started dancing doesnt carry a glowing topcoat.
...shopping for work clothes is now fun.
...you have to watch where you spend large amounts of 2$ bills (well thats only around here)in case somebody knows somebody thats not supposed to know youre a stripper.
...you constantly have your mirror on the floor so you can parctice floorwork and see how it looks.
...you once never wore flats or left the house w/out makeup...now you always where flats and only where makeup if you have to work.
...you don't bat an eyelash to walking in on a coworker on the phone screaming and/or crying...in fact its REALLY weird if that doesnt happen at least once a night.
...you see a pretty girl and think of what she'd look like in stripper clothes and how she'd move on stage.
...$5 really isnt that much for a redbull.
...when you come across all those old clothes you never wore, and thank god you didnt get rid of them...because a little snip here, some sequins here...and thats one damn fine outfit.
...you had to come up with a good reason AWFUL fast for the white vinyl knee high 7 inch heeled boots that you forgot to take out of your trunk when your bf was showing it to a friend that might buy it.
cameron_keys
08-08-2007, 11:24 AM
...you had to come up with a good reason AWFUL fast for the white vinyl knee high 7 inch heeled boots that you forgot to take out of your trunk when your bf was showing it to a friend that might buy it.
Ok I have to know..what did you come up with?
Taylorlila
08-08-2007, 11:30 AM
I think I said my bf bought them for me because he thought they were hot to wear around the house lol. They're too damn big to fit in my half size locker!!
Bella21
08-08-2007, 01:58 PM
^I've had people find my crazy shoes in my trunk before. :) I always use "my friend is a model" hehehe
gingerlee
08-08-2007, 02:19 PM
...you once never wore flats or left the house w/out makeup...now you always where flats and only where makeup if you have to work.
Damn straight! ;D
Bella21
08-08-2007, 06:52 PM
...unless you're in a good mood, you tend to snarl at men hitting on you
...you have a day every week or two that you don't leave the house or answer your phone
...you have a secret hiding place for cash
...you have to lie to family members about how you're able to afford your vacations/free time/big TV's/etc
and yes... grocery store trips involve flip flops... and who wants to waste that make-up anyways??