View Full Version : Mean Girls

07-30-2003, 06:41 PM
Have you ever had the girls at your club talk about you behind your back and do mean things because you are making more money than they are?
It happens a lot at my club. I've been working there for nine months now. A few months ago I started making more money (since I wasn't new anymore) and have been making more and more money, the girls have been viscious! Two of the girls that I was friends with now won't even say "hi" to me and are alwasy glaring in my direction. It almost makes me want to give up, but then I know I can't, I need the money :)
So have you girls ever had to deal with that at your clubs and what did you do?

07-30-2003, 08:22 PM
I ignore them. You are there to make money, not friends. If you can make friends, all the better, but you should concentrate on your customers, not what the girls are doing and saying. Just stay out of the dressing room and stay on the floor. Guess what? Doing this will make you EVEN MORE MONEY, and thus the vicious cycle begins again. ;)

07-30-2003, 08:50 PM
You know what, I know what you are talking about. I had it hit even closer and more personal. I was friends with this girl, we were inseperable. We decided to start dancing, she started a few moths before I did. Anyway When I started working at the club, I saw a whole different girl then the one I knew outside the club. It wasnt long before I was the target of all her sh!t talking and gossip. And yup I made more $$ than her (it was obvious) I ignored her,made it look like it didnt phase me, always made it a point to look like I was having a great time and it made her try even harder to demolish my reputation among dancers and customers.
The thing is, with those kind of people, they are transparent, and its obvious to everone that comes in contact with them, what they are like and what they are trying to do.
So really its best to ignore them.

07-30-2003, 09:14 PM
I learned early on to down play what I make. You know at the end of the night when girls are asking how your night was, I just say something like "oh not that great... gotta keep coming in so the bills get paid ya know what I mean girl." then change the subject. Some will respond quite bluntly that they never tell, I'm naturally blunt to a fault myself; but you gotta be tactful if having them not like you makes you feel uncomfortable.
If you don't give out an actual amount than the only way they could know is if they're spending their night counting your dances, if so it won't take too long to learn how to 'shake them haters off' An ability that will benefit you your whole life.

07-31-2003, 01:45 AM
oh yeah, they all assume you are doing stuff you aren't supposed too be doing because you must be doing "something" to make all that money (and of course it's never get off your lazy ass and work for it!)

Just laugh it off. There will be girls that hate you everywhere and if you quit because of them, then they win.

We've all been there....when someone else is making crazy money when we are working hard too and need the money. It's frustrating to see.

07-31-2003, 02:16 AM
Two of the girls that I was friends with now won't even say "hi" to me and are always glaring in my direction.

Don't know why I didn't think of this before. Marquita and I have been good friends for over four years now(that's her in the picture with me in the gallery it may still be in the upload folder), before we ever worked together. When we did I always did better than her. I moved away for a while and when I came back she had changed into this freaky robot money making machine. We travel together club hoping and every club we work at the girls treat her just like you've described. Never directly bitchy to her or in front of me; but the vibe is there. I've actually caught myself glaring at her a couple times and have even made a snide comment or two. I can see how that looks from her point of view; BUT honestly the only thoughts going through my head are admiration (not jealousy) and really just trying to learn from her. I'm no amateur; but damn, this girl's good! She NEVER sits on "stripper row" and she's always looking for that next dance in a cheerful manor.

Nobody wants to look like a lost puppy begging for tips ESPECIALLY from an 18yr old new girl (no offence). It could very well be they're trying to learn from you under hostile guise so they won't look like a kiss ass in front of others. Very immature but also very likely.

07-31-2003, 02:45 AM
oh yeah...there are girls that will be nice to you if you are making money too...they want to learn what you are doing so they can too!

When I was a newbie, I made "friends" with a dancer that was making tons of money. She was an A-cup and 34 and easily the top money-maker when there were prettier girls there. I talked to her, not just about dancing, but about other things. I wanted to get under her wing and I wanted to be the girl she came to when she needed a second girl for whatever reason....of course, lots of girls hated her too, so I was.

Anyway, I learned a lot from her. She has since left the club and now I'm the girl that a lot of newbies come to saying "what are you saying to [email protected]" or am bitched and sneered at by the veterans. there are worst places to be than that....especially since management likes the girls that are making the money. You are sitting pretty. :)

07-31-2003, 06:53 AM
my first rule was to be nice to other dancers, but NEVER become buds with any that worked inside the club i do.
By my "keeping my distance" i stayed out of the hassle of dealing with gossip, and talk about my earnings. The other dancers did not know my earnings.

Being nice to others is great, but i never took it much past a hello or good-bye.

Worked for me,

08-04-2003, 05:56 AM
What do I care?

People can say what they will about me. I'm not especially nice or mean to anyone I work with. none of them know anything about my private life, except that it's good! This can breed comtempt in itself...so why get even more personal?

08-06-2003, 03:56 AM
I think that Naomi's point about being tactful is wise advice. One night I asked another dancer how her night was going and she was so rude. She actually said that she thought that anyone who would ask that was "tacky". I was only asking because it was a very slow night and sometimes it helps to get a little encouragement from other dancers who are doing alright on a slow night. I was always in the top 3 for sales and she definately was not.
If I were more of a tough, fighting type of chic I would have kicked her ass. Unfortunately I am a petit person who just has to let stuff like that slide.
But always remember to be friendly and try to give a few tips that have worked for you on a particular night. That is usually what most dancers want to hear -- just a little encouragement.

08-06-2003, 10:24 AM
If I were more of a tough, fighting type of chic I would have kicked her ass. Unfortunately I am a petit person who just has to let stuff like that slide.

I hate to admit this; but I do have a tendency to go off on anyone who disrespects me or a friend. I actually wish I were more like those girls who just let things slide. The worse part is that I don't think it's a rage issue, I don't go off yelling and screaming like a wild animal (which is typical) I keep my voice down so nobody else knows what's going on and tell her exactly what I think of her. If it goes on (usually they stammer some apology to me or my friend) then I end up waiting however long it takes to catch her alone and that's when I loose it.

It hasn't happened yet; but some day my temper's gonna go off on the wrong girl and that's when I'm gonna get my ass kicked. So the "tough" girls wish they were more easy going and visa versa.

08-10-2003, 05:53 AM
When I worked here in florida at a club full time I was the top girl and I was always busy I never even had time to comb my hair or redo my lipstick, so I never really hung out w/ anyone or said anything to offend anyone as I was always busy,well I noticed my dance bag was stinking and I had a persian cat who had peed in my bag before but it smelled different well aia never knew what it was I got a new bag, then my best friend from high school who worked there to tells me like a year latter oh yeah chevy& jessie peed in your bag ,nice.

08-10-2003, 02:18 PM
Another thing about the "mean girls" at clubs. Sometimes a person who is just being plain old mean is very insecure with themselves, and that will bring about jealousy as well as other harsh feelings towards others.

I have learned to read 'most' of them by body language alone, and stayed clear. They have issues, and some can be dangerous when confronted.

They are simply mean because they can be very angry, insecure people.
Nothing worse than a "poker faced stripper" in the club.

They have been known to do damage to themselves and others.

08-10-2003, 08:22 PM
after reading this i feel really glad my club keeps the drama to a minimum, sometimes at all costs.

08-10-2003, 08:32 PM
...my best friend from high school who worked there to tells me like a year latter oh yeah chevy& jessie peed in your bag ,nice.

You must have lost your mind when she told you that!
Okay I gotta know; do you still work with these girls? If so what did you do? I'm not sure what I would do; but knowing me I would've slapped the girl friend right then and there for not telling me when it happened.

I don't know though Michele, if they're trashy enough to urinate on someone's stuff than I might've thought twice about getting involved. I'd probably just pull the 'ol "oops I lost my balance, thank goodness you were there to break the fall of my lit cigarette." [evil]

08-10-2003, 09:10 PM
after reading this i feel really glad my club keeps the drama to a minimum, sometimes at all costs.

Well that's nice; but you've only been dancing for a few weeks now, just wait, before you know it you'll be reminiscing, with a laugh, on some of the crazy drama you've seen go on. Rules are broken all the time, trust me ya just gotta watch quietly from a far and at least you'll get a good laugh. ::)

08-10-2003, 10:04 PM
Naomi~~~I PMed you, go read ;D

Yeah I would have gone off on the girl who knew about it if she was supposed to be my friend. Id have a few choice words for her thats for sure.

08-11-2003, 03:26 AM
this happened around 8 years ago , and I never really found out about it until the club closed and I went somewere else, but like 4 years latter that girl started working w/ me at the club I moved to and I told everyone and one night I was like hey chevy remember when you peed in my bag years ago and she denied it, she was a looser anyhow.

08-11-2003, 03:33 AM
It's all true, girls are jealous and vindictive! All you can do is ignore them but be polite, it will all blow over. Just remember, you are there to work and make money, not friends, as hard as that may be!

08-11-2003, 03:39 AM
Sorry if i don't think it's funny to see another dancer ripped off, or worse yet beaten up by some "mean dancer".

The clubs i worked we had very little drama, always with the dancer getting thrown out. We never had a good laugh over someone pissing on others personal items. Or starting a physical 'cat fight'.

This crap is never good for a clubs reputation, or the poor dancers that have to go through this crap while trying to make a buck.


08-11-2003, 08:36 AM
One thing I have learned is to stay back and let the drama fly elsewhere. Becoming involved with the people you work with at the club is the worst thing that you can do. to keep your job and your homelife separate is always the best idea! Less chance of getting hurt mentally, physically or emotionally. As someone once told me, I am a collection agency, I come do my job and collect the money. some of the best advice I could ever get.

10-20-2003, 02:41 PM
I used to have a big problem with a couple girls like that. Guess what? They got fired for causing too much drama. Of course, people see when you're always in the VIP room but when they ask I usually say, not so good. (and lately, that's been honest :D). Everyonce in a while, I say, I did great! So it's harder for them to keep track. Of course I'm always guilty for asking girls how they're doing. It's a really bad habit I know but it's how I keep myself working.

10-21-2003, 04:22 AM
I work with women like that. I can't stand it when they start gossiping about someone else in front of me or try to include me in on their bashing. I's uncomfortable and it creates negative energy; I walk away, refusing to let it ruin my night (and cringe knowing that they're most likely doing it to me too!)

10-21-2003, 09:02 PM
just fucking ignore them who made them god? if you let theyre bs determine your destiny you will have.

10-23-2003, 11:37 PM
When I was a teenager I was hideous to others... Although I didn't dance then... I was JUST rotten to others. :-[ I had some issues that I need to sort through and eventually I did... :-/ I really see those "mean girls" like me when I was a scared young women... I was hurting... and it only made sense for me (at the time) to want others to feel that way too.

Now that I've got my shit under control... gained a few years and released a lot of hurt... I have a different viewpoint of how to deal with "mean girls"...

Be nice. Blow off when they get sassy with you. Keep private but don't write EVERYONE off. There are lots of diamonds in this strippers mine... LOOK at all the intelligent, analytical, sassy girls on this website... Even we (or speaking for myself, I) can (still) be "mean" (watch out for my laser eyes that burn into your soul [evil]!!!) sometimes.

10-24-2003, 03:19 AM
never ever give up!!!!because of some stupid girls NO way!!!

This happens in many clubs, there are always some girls around who are jalours on girls who making more then them.
But please don't give a SH*T!! ;)
Just be more cleffer then them.
If they are talking about you to other costumers, the costumers will observate automaticly so that's one plus point!!!
so what to do..... now you have to make them more incurious. ???
Be happy ;D not to much off course because then it will look fake.
Smile, have some chat's with other costumers, be friendly to the rest of the girls. NEVER go to the bar and sit there alone because it looks like you don't have friends and maybe it is true what the other girls told them.
Walk around, smile, and be gentle.
always's go after them to that costumer to see how he react to you, if he react cold.... than still keep smile and ask him if he don't feel good or if there is a problem, probably he will tell you what he heard about you and then you give him a sweet and cleffer answer like: "look into my eye's do you really believe this girls? do i really look like i am a bad girl??? and ;) 100% he will smile and want to know you more better, so ask for a drink and say to give you a change to prove that you are a good girl ::) ha ha (if you got the drink cheers with him after that look to the girls and put your glass high and grins ;)

I love this game's because you get more power and they feel so silly after that. Anyway Don't get angry of them because then you are the one who loosed.

10-26-2003, 03:57 PM
those kind of girls want you to give up dont give them the satisfaction.

10-27-2003, 02:35 AM
There's always a jealous bitch lurking around, trying to f*** with you. But, I brush them off and let them hoes be jealous of me. In the end, they're the ones who get fired instead of me! >:( ;D