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MeganS
01-31-2004, 09:30 AM
no normal self-respecting man wants to think about the one he loves " working it on someone else in any way shape or form, and if they dont mind then they really dont care about you. because the whole reason for a relationship is to share what you have with one person, not them and who ever else has the money to see it.


I'm really impressed with the fact that you can insult my husband by claiming he's not a normal self respecting man who just doesn't really care about me. IMO, no self respecting man who RESPECTS his SO would put her in a compromising position where she feels the need to vent to her fellow ladies, only to have you come around lurking, not even granting her the right to her own damn privacy! That's just rich. You sure are a catch, aren't you. :sarcastic:

Pamela
01-31-2004, 09:55 AM
I had a BF who was not pleased with my jobs. He seemed to accept it all just fine for a time however, then wham...Stopped calling etc.

I figure this guy wants to be a software programmer, fine. It's a friggin job! So is mine. >:(

People need to get the hell over themsleves already with the "hollier then thou" SHIT. >:( >:( >:(

You wanna pay all my bills, i quit working, until then i have to support myself child, pets and house! ;D

Pamela

Malibu
01-31-2004, 10:24 AM
I always try to imagine if I were in his shoes. Funny thing is, if my boyfriend was a male stripper, I would find it so f*cking hilarious that I wouldn't want him to quit! Damn, but it isn't the same thing, is it?

I have thought about life that way too. Other couples survive without their other half working in a strip club, I don't think it is impossible. But I am not in your situation so I don't know exactly how things are. Also, I don't know completely how you'd feel about giving up dancing for your man. Is it an issue that you'd throw back in his face at a later stage? Always remember, that a couple = compromise so if you're both willing to give up stripping, then please look into something. There must be other employment options suitable for your lifestyle (I know, easier said than done but if you don't try then you'll never find out).

GirlFriday
01-31-2004, 11:17 AM
:) Coincidentally, opie and samsteele have the EXACT same i.p. address, nice catch holiday ;)

Emily
01-31-2004, 11:43 AM
That figures! What a whackjob Opie is.

I hope all this helps Theresa.

carmenNYC
02-01-2004, 05:22 PM
I just have to think, if it bothers him now, won't it still bother him in the future that you were a stripper? That might be something to consider when you make your decision.


true true true!!! some guys will NEVER get over the fact that you were a stripper- even past tense. Grrrr!!!!
one guy i know has this theory about girls: "was a stripper, is a stripper, or wants to be a stripper."

HolidayOnStage
02-01-2004, 06:40 PM
:) Coincidentally, opie and samsteele have the EXACT same i.p. address, nice catch holiday ;)


lol..I knew all those Criminal Investigation classes I took in college would come in handy..Ok..now back to being a dumb blonde stripper. lol

CrescentLuna
02-01-2004, 07:57 PM
This is weird to me, my boyfriend [of 4.5 years] has been pretty supportive of the stripping thing. I'd say vague things like "what do you think if maybe one day I thought about stripping?" reply: "You'd make a lot of money. You should do that."
Me: "I think I'm going to start stripping."
him: "Awesome!"

though, weirdly, when we were getting out of the car before I went into the strip club, I was like "eep, I really don't want to be turned down, that's the really nerve-racking part" he says "but you're just doing it for the money, right?"
erm... ? I wouldn't do it for free but if I hated the idea I wouldn't no matter the money?

Joey
02-03-2004, 01:00 PM
opie....you really burned yourself on this one buddy. If you loved her so much why not let her be her own person? You cant even let her make her own decision without trying to sway her towards the outcome that you would like to happen. Saying things like, "if this is the one, than there should be nothin to think about". By saying that, you are trying to make her feel guilty about even questioning quitting dancing. It seems to me, judging from her other post about relationships, that your behavior about this is making her question things on YOUR end.
In my opinion I think that you may have some resentment towards her because you moved away from important things in your life, and you are now taking that out on her by making her give up something that she obviously enjoys. You go on and on about how important she is to you, and what you do for her...blah blah blah, but your not even giving her the right to make her own choices without going through the obvious effort to change her mind FOR her! I dont know your full situation, but if you really want this to work out, i would suggest giving her some space to be a person.
Theresa..........
what the others have said, i totally agree with. I would not give up dancing if i were you. You obviously are very independent or you wouldnt even question this. That means you are strong, dont let him control you, apparently he doesnt care how you feel about this, or he wouldnt have gone through so much to change your mind. Please PLease dont fall into it, you have things to do in your life, if hes really there for the long ride, than he will understand and support you in whatever way is needed.

bambiblue
02-09-2004, 12:40 PM
I think you have to quit in your own timing and not be forced into something. I have kids, college loans, rent, car payment, bills.... and this is just what I have to do to get where I want to be in life. So no I would never quit, but then again I have been single for a long time and have never had a boyfriend while I was dancing. It just doesn't seem right to me. I was a lingerie model (same thing only clothed) for 2 years and had a bf who didnt care though so i never felt I had to choose.

darkness
02-14-2004, 12:19 PM
umm..you have to think,we can only dance for a short time!what happens when the money you saved is now all gone and so is your guy and so is the chance for you to dance anymore?then your screwed!

Juliette_deSade
02-17-2004, 06:25 PM
I am in the middle of a transition that is very much for me. I pretty much only strip about once a week. I WAS influenced by a man, but he does not make the decisions for me. I will continue to dance to supplement other income, like a music store. Changes that I have personally made are the biggest driving factor for me to not dance.

Theresa, how comfortable are you with your work environment? How confident are you? These are questions you should be asking yourself. Come to that place on your own. Many dancers do feel the need to quit. Just take your SO out of the picture when you take these things into consideration. you live with your decisions forever. You don't necessarily keep a man around though. If you want to be hard on yourself, only do so if YOUR conscience tells you that you have a reason.

Be true to YOUR SELF.
JDS

Sexy
02-19-2004, 02:00 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote from: opie1216 on January 24, 2004, 12:25:28 pm
no normal self-respecting man wants to think about the one he loves " working it on someone else in any way shape or form, and if they dont mind then they really dont care about you. because the whole reason for a relationship is to share what you have with one person, not them and who ever else has the money to see it.

Megan:

I'm really impressed with the fact that you can insult my husband by claiming he's not a normal self respecting man who just doesn't really care about me. IMO, no self respecting man who RESPECTS his SO would put her in a compromising position where she feels the need to vent to her fellow ladies, only to have you come around lurking, not even granting her the right to her own damn privacy! That's just rich. You sure are a catch, aren't you.





Hehe... I was thinking the same thing... my husband IS a Normal Self Respecting guy who loves me enough to want me to enjoy one of my passions. He is thrilled seeing me being thrilled. He loves me so much. The fact is I would quit for him. My marriage is more important than dancing but because my husband loves me he wants me to be Me.

SuzyRea
02-29-2004, 04:40 PM
I had an ex-boyfriend make me quit. This is why he is an EX-BOYFRIEND! He would have totaly flipped if he had known I was also working as an escort a couple of nights a week.

For the right guy, I would stop everything. But its going to be my idea!

Esmerelda
02-29-2004, 06:13 PM
I recently met someone who said he would make it worth my while to quit. We are seeing each other long-distance. He gives me money to pay my bills and gives me gifts. Although he does this, after two months I went back. I'm a very independent person, and I operate under a great deal of autonomy. No matter how much he gives me, it'll never be enough to change my personality and desire to earn my money myself.

S4L
02-29-2004, 08:03 PM
I know a lot of girls that quit for a guy. Almost everyone ended with him back at the bar looking to pick up another dancer.

SexyGemini
02-29-2004, 08:25 PM
To answer the question on this thread...No I've never quit dancing for a guy nor will I ever.

asingledancer
03-02-2004, 02:02 AM
I considered it. But the money was too good(stripping) and college is not getting paid by him!

Oh, and to teresa.. Why would you want to be a guy that comes off as such an controling jerk? For god's sake, his sentence structure leads me to believe that he is not the brightest "bulb" out there! At least find a guy with intelligence. You sound ...and from the picture LOOK way too good for him!
THATS PART OF THE REASON HES SO INSECURE :)

Crystal585
03-02-2004, 10:09 PM
Making a decision to quit dancing for a guy is a different decision for everybody. My personal feeling is if you yourself want to quit for the guy then go for it but if you dont want to quit and the BF is pressuring you to, then get out of the relationship. People who love you in life love you for who you are even if they dont agree with everything you do. I lived with a guy who I almost maried for 7 years I got out of the relationship when I was 25 partly because while he was a loving well educated person with good character, he didnt want to marry a dancer. I left because I wasnt willing to have somebody tell me how to live my life or make me feel like less or a person. My husband now is very supportive of what I do, he knows that I am true to him that I dont cheat and that I leave work at work. He loves me for who I am and I have never been happier, and when I want to quit dancing I will, but ill quit because I want to not because somebody makes me feel bad for what I do.