View Full Version : Stripper Fondling
Sitri
09-10-2004, 08:29 AM
VG,
I am not suggesting that this should be done as a matter of practice, I am suggesting that people make mistakes.
Granted, there is limited information here, but I think people need to work it out before they kick you out.
VenusGoddess
09-10-2004, 08:32 AM
Oh, I agree. Although in the article, the woman did mention that it's something he's constantly "bragging" about and finds funny. My overall view of that situation was that he was just being disrespectful. There are some things that just cannot be worked out...this may have been one of them for this particular person. :D
P.S. I still wuv you. LOL :kiss:
Sitri
09-10-2004, 09:56 AM
wuv u 2. ;D
FONDL
09-10-2004, 09:56 AM
This is one of the funniest threads I've seen. As someone who has been married for over 30 years, I just love getting marriage advice from people who have never been married. Kind of like taking tennis lessons from someone who has never played. Some of you are in for a very rude awakening someday.
AinNY
09-10-2004, 12:48 PM
This is one of the funniest threads I've seen. As someone who has been married for over 30 years, I just love getting marriage advice from people who have never been married. Kind of like taking tennis lessons from someone who has never played. Some of you are in for a very rude awakening someday.
Ignorant statement :-\
goldclubbing
09-10-2004, 02:29 PM
Fondl-I've been married for more than a decade and with my wife for more than fifteen years and find that marriage is a process...the amount of time matters not its what you put into it and the attention you give the relationship that matters.
As far as why would you fondle or engage in sexual activity with someone outside the relationship? It happens...but put it in the lock box because IMO most girls are like Venus...you can look but if you touch...thats the last hot meal your getting from me, get your whore to cook for you bastard!
Madcap
09-10-2004, 08:02 PM
AinNY~ I share, in theory, your sorta flowery view of marriage (I share it, but i think it's bullshit at the same time in most circumstances, people marry others they just aren't right for nineteen times out of twenty). But I know that in not every situation every detail should be voiced. Nor does it need to be. This is no attack on you or your point of view, however, since i understand your view (as much as i can, anyway)...
Starts, he should not have been stroking the dancer's ass (or whatever). This doesn't stem from his being married, but rather from a basic respect for another person's body.
Seconds, he should have just kept his dumb assed mouth shut about it. He got tossed from a SC, why tell the world? If he told his wife, he told a lot of others.
But, if she doesn't trust him, and if he's fondling other women then she has reason to, why is she married to him? If she's that freaked out by it then she needs to divorce him and marry someone who is more to her liking.
Look, i don't see a whole hell of a lot to respect in this man, but if i were in his shoes, i'd have never married a woman that did not have trust for me. Nothing bothers me more than a jealous woman.
I, for one, am not the jealous type. If i'm WITH a girl, then i'm giving her trust until she fucks that up and then there is no trust, and no relationship. I don't care what has happened up until now, screw me over and you hit the highway. And i mean this in both a sexual and a nonsexual way. I've been through that shit with giving chance after chance to someone that doesn't even deserve a second one. I'll be goddammned if i ever let anyone break my heart for the second time again.
And, the fact is that i think that any woman i am with should feel the same way i do about it. TRUST until there is a reason not to trust.
The way i would see it would be COOK that marriage. She tosses him for that, then she didn't trust him from the get-go.
It really seems like the way a couple people see it, here, no-one should ever get married.
EDIT: Adding that i'm not blaming her for not trusting, he gave her reason. But cook the marriage nonetheless. So help me god i will never even enter into a relationship with a woman that has a problem with me entering a SC. I'm not some animal that goes nuts at the sight of something that makes it's cock hard. She treats me like i am and we have problems.
MojoJojo
09-11-2004, 12:18 AM
I may be a freak, but I really don't see what the big deal is.
FONDL
09-11-2004, 06:19 AM
I think a lot of you have been watching too much Dr. Phil. There aren't nearly enough facts known about this situation to come to any conclusions.
AinNY, I suggest you put your posts to this thread in a time capsule and open it in 30 years or so. You'll be amazed at how much your views have changed. If you're lucky you'll even have become wise enough to realize that you owe me an apology.
Lilith
09-11-2004, 06:46 AM
If we're really lucky, you'll ride your arrogant ass out on the high horse you rode in on. First, I doubt you've quite reached the level of perfection in which you seem to perceive yourself. Second, why should we take your word for it? For all we know, you're a lonely 46 year old fat guy living in his mother's basement, surrounded by fifteen cats.
VenusGoddess
09-11-2004, 06:54 AM
:rotfl:
afxturnip
09-11-2004, 08:22 AM
For all we know, you're a lonely 46 year old fat guy living in his mother's basement, surrounded by fifteen cats.
And what, pray tell, is wrong with that? I just pretend I'm Peter Ustinov in Logan's Run...
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
And so forth and so on. I'm just waiting for Jenny Agutter to show up, and I'll knock off that Michael York bozo and wow her with a deep and inscrutable singular name.
-afx
Katrine
09-11-2004, 02:39 PM
My cat has 3 names Afx <swoon> ;)
AinNY
09-11-2004, 04:15 PM
I think a lot of you have been watching too much Dr. Phil. There aren't nearly enough facts known about this situation to come to any conclusions.
AinNY, I suggest you put your posts to this thread in a time capsule and open it in 30 years or so. You'll be amazed at how much your views have changed. If you're lucky you'll even have become wise enough to realize that you owe me an apology.
Good luck with that...im a nice guy...but im not that nice...i dont owe you an apology for anything. I was just discussing something and voicing my opinion.
You said that its worthless listening to someone's opinion b/c of their "status" or age or whatever...THAT IS JUST PLAIN IGNORANT. Its your choice...but its ignorant...whether or not you want to accept that fact is not my problem.
Being married and being old means nothing. You couldve gotten married at 17 in high school to your wife...never having been in another relationship....What would make you an expert in relationships? Beign married means nothing...it doesnt make you more knowledgeable than me or anyone else.
Marraige is a piece of paper...and thats it....a relationship is a relationship...its all the same...saying your married doesnt change anything...
I dont care to argue this anymore. I know what i think and I will always stand by it....maybe its idealistic and far fethched...but its what I believe and what I desire in my life. I'll aim for perfection(or close to it) instead of accepting mediocrity(sp?).
And WHY WOULD YOU NOT TELL YOUR WIFE....i still dont get this. I'm just not the type that ever hides anything....regardless if Im going to get in trouble for it. If I fucked up I'll take my consequences even if it means ending the relationship. When Im in a relationship with someone...especially someone i am married to, I dont ever want there to be something I cant tell her.
ONCE AGAIN...Im weird. :-\
afxturnip
09-11-2004, 04:23 PM
You said that its worthless listening to someone's opinion b/c of their "status" or age or whatever...THAT IS JUST PLAIN IGNORANT. Its your choice...but its ignorant...whether or not you want to accept that fact is not my problem.
Being married and being old means nothing. You couldve gotten married at 17 in high school to your wife...never having been in another relationship....What would make you an expert in relationships? Beign married means nothing...it doesnt make you more knowledgeable than me or anyone else.
I'm being very literary today, and in the same thread too! All this discussion reminded me of Thoreau. From Walden...
---------------------
When we consider what, to use the words of the catechism, is the chief end of man, and what are the true necessaries and means of life, it appears as if men had deliberately chosen the common mode of living because they preferred it to any other. Yet they honestly think there is no choice left. But alert and healthy natures remember that the sun rose clear. It is never too late to give up our prejudices. No way of thinking or doing, however ancient, can be trusted without proof. What everybody echoes or in silence passes by as true today may turn out to be falsehood tomorrow, mere smoke of opinion, which some had trusted for a cloud that would sprinkle fertilizing rain on their fields. What old people say you cannot do, you try and find that you can. Old deeds for old people, and new deeds for new. Old people did not know enough once, perchance, to fetch fresh fuel to keep the fire a-going; new people put a little dry wood under a pot, and are whirled round the globe with the speed of birds, in a way to kill old people, as the phrase is. Age is no better, hardly so well, qualified for an instructor as youth, for it has not profited so much as it has lost. One may almost doubt if the wisest man has learned anything of absolute value by living. Practically, the old have no very important advice to give the young, their own experience has been so partial, and their lives have been such miserable failures, for private reasons, as they must believe; and it may be that they have some faith left which belies that experience, and they are only less young than they were. I have lived some thirty years on this planet, and I have yet to hear the first syllable of valuable or even earnest advice from my seniors. They have told me nothing, and probably cannot tell me anything to the purpose. Here is life, an experiment to a great extent untried by me; but it does not avail me that they have tried it. If I have any experience which I think valuable, I am sure to reflect that this my Mentors said nothing about.
One farmer says to me, "You cannot live on vegetable food solely, for it furnishes nothing to make bones with"; and so he religiously devotes a part of his day to supplying his system with the raw material of bones; walking all the while he talks behind his oxen, which, with vegetable-made bones, jerk him and his lumbering plow along in spite of every obstacle. Some things are really necessaries of life in some circles, the most helpless and diseased, which in others are luxuries merely, and in others still are entirely unknown.
The whole ground of human life seems to some to have been gone over by their predecessors, both the heights and the valleys, and all things to have been cared for. According to Evelyn, "the wise Solomon prescribed ordinances for the very distances of trees; and the Roman praetors have decided how often you may go into your neighbor's land to gather the acorns which fall on it without trespass, and what share belongs to that neighbor." Hippocrates has even left directions how we should cut our nails; that is, even with the ends of the fingers, neither shorter nor longer. Undoubtedly the very tedium and ennui which presume to have exhausted the variety and the joys of life are as old as Adam. But man's capacities have never been measured; nor are we to judge of what he can do by any precedents, so little has been tried. Whatever have been thy failures hitherto, "be not afflicted, my child, for who shall assign to thee what thou hast left undone?"
------------
Okay enough spam for the day. Eat hearty.
-afx
NinaDaisy
09-11-2004, 04:32 PM
IMO, the wife was looking for a handy excuse to toss his ass out. Too bad we can't hear her side of the story...
If that wasn't the case, she was being overly sensitive in part due to the general ignorance and presumptions most people make regarding strippers.
MojoJojo
09-12-2004, 08:40 AM
Learning when to keep your mouth shut is an important part of a long term relationship. The whole "total open honesty at all times" policy is a dangerous one.
I disagree that marriage is "simply a piece of paper." For many, it is a holy commitment that cannot be compared to a relationship.
For others, such as myself, it is a statement about what you're basically willing to go through for the other person. The fact is, at its best a divorce is expensive. When you're not married, walking away is much easier.
AinNY
09-12-2004, 10:11 AM
I disagree that marriage is "simply a piece of paper." For many, it is a holy commitment that cannot be compared to a relationship.
I agree Mojo....i didnt just mean its a piece of paper....i mean its what you make of it. Being married is just a status unless you make it otherwise.
Saying you are married isnt something that impresses me anymore(it used to mean a little more, but looking at the people that get married nowadays its just not that special anymore)...any two morons with 20 bucks can get married in Vegas...
If that makes any sense ???
polecat
09-12-2004, 10:47 AM
I know what i think and I will always stand by it....maybe its idealistic and far fethched...but its what I believe and what I desire in my life. I'll aim for perfection(or close to it) instead of accepting mediocrity(sp?).
Bravo. Then this you shall always have. It makes finding a mate incredibly difficult, but there are some out there that share the same beliefs.
The tough part is sticking to those guns and not wasting too much time with obviously unmatched candidates... usually because they are extremely good in bed. LOL. Men AND women are guilty of wasting away too much time with a 'bad fit' relationship because the alternative of loneliness seems too unbearable when you have someone, no matter how bad a fit, in your life. Yet being alone is the only way not to thwart your search for that special someone, hence it's shooting yourself in the foot.
Back on the topic of this story- I believe the article isn't telling all the details just by knowing a little bit about human nature. Most people wouldn't flush a marriage of that many years down the toilet for one indiscretion. There just had to be much more grief in their history. Heck, most people put up with a LOT more grief than they should ever consider they deserve before finally breaking things off.
MojoJojo
09-12-2004, 11:15 AM
I hear ya. And since 50% of marriages fail, even listening to those who are married could be risky.
goldclubbing
09-12-2004, 11:18 AM
Lets get back to the topic...STRIPPER FONDLING...I'm for it!
NinaDaisy
09-12-2004, 03:49 PM
Lets get back to the topic...STRIPPER FONDLING...I'm for it!
And what if the stripper isn't?
We haven't heard her side of the story either...
MojoJojo
09-12-2004, 03:55 PM
I've had dances from a few strippers that encouraged fondling because we knew one another on a more personal basis. In that case, I went with the flow. I have, during drunken stupors, heard the words, "Watch the hands, Mikey." which I always comply with. Industrial Strip, of course, was a different story, since that is what they advertise, but even then I was rather timid.
goldclubbing
09-12-2004, 04:47 PM
Nina-the only strippers I know never have a problem telling me or any other guy their boundries.
NinaDaisy
09-13-2004, 03:55 AM
Nina-the only strippers I know never have a problem telling me or any other guy their boundries.
That may be true, but unfortunately there are times the guy crosses them very suddenly without even asking that the dancer has to "comment" on it.
Sitri
09-13-2004, 04:19 AM
I think if we build in some more characters, like her mother, the mother-in-law, his buddies, the strippers boyfriend.
We can have a full-blown fictional soap opera..... ;D
goldclubbing
09-13-2004, 11:58 AM
Point taken Nina...question for you, whats an appropriate way to tell the touchy feely type of dancer to knock it off without having them take that as rejection?
VenusGoddess
09-13-2004, 12:02 PM
I've had dances from a few strippers that encouraged fondling because we knew one another on a more personal basis. In that case, I went with the flow. I have, during drunken stupors, heard the words, "Watch the hands, Mikey." which I always comply with. Industrial Strip, of course, was a different story, since that is what they advertise, but even then I was rather timid.
Ewwwww...I cannot believe that you actually went there. YUCK!! *Washes eyes with soap and water* Just reading that gives me the creepies. :yuck:
VenusGoddess
09-13-2004, 12:04 PM
Point taken Nina...question for you, whats an appropriate way to tell the touchy feely type of dancer to knock it off without having them take that as rejection?
How about: "Listen, as much as I like you...the next time you touch me, you could find vice slapping cuffs on. And, I'm not in the position to bail you out...touching is illegal here, sweetie."
VenusGoddess
09-13-2004, 12:06 PM
I think if we build in some more characters, like her mother, the mother-in-law, his buddies, the strippers boyfriend.
We can have a full-blown fictional soap opera..... ;D
Well, I'll bet Betty Sue (the best friend) told her to kick him out. She tried to talk her into staking out the club and jumping the girl on the way out, but the scorned woman didn't feel comfortable doing that. Last I heard, she was going to file for divorce on grounds of mental anguish, adultery, and just plain drunken stupidness. Of course, we haven't started talking about the little flings on her side. But, since she didn't know those men (and her husband knew this stripper) it doesn't count. :)
goldclubbing
09-13-2004, 01:44 PM
Venus I think I worded my question badly because I think it would be a little extreme to say that to a dancer for grabbing my package now and then. Its just not appropriate any more than it is for me to check her oil. I guess I can answer my own question, seek a less gropy dancer.
VenusGoddess
09-13-2004, 06:11 PM
Ooopsy...sorry, I misread that...I thought you were asking what a dancer should say to a customer. :D
But, how about, "I'm much more comfortable with the 'no-touch' approach." *smile, wink, wink, smile*