View Full Version : Unanswered Questions...
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 09:04 AM
^^^
Um, I think Trix are good. I think the rabbit would have been happy. It is only a rabbit. Rabbits don't have angst. See? http://mfrost.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/lazin.png
Rabbit angst? Ill give you rabbit angst -
http://www.angryalien.com/0204/exorcistbunnies.html
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 09:25 AM
PJ... LMFAO
That was great!
Djoser
06-09-2006, 09:27 AM
PJ, you crack me up--the neighbors are now convinced I'm insane, after hearing my reaction to that Trix rabbit post.
And Jenny, what is that bunny doing, eating Trix? That's a funny picture, I love it.
I have actually heard that male rabbits can be quite vicious around other males, and will kill them. Maybe if they ate Trix they'd mellow out a bit--but with all the sugar in it, they might get worse, like the bunny from The Holy Grail. Maybe that's why rabbits should never, ever eat Trix...
Hell, I liked the stuff when I was a kid, but we didn't eat it much--my parents weren't fond of breakfast cereals, since they had never seen Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail (the feasting passage from before the Holy Hand Grenade, not the rabbit part).
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 09:30 AM
"And fruitbats, and orangutangs, and breakfast cereals...."
"skip a bit, brother."
"and thine enemies, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."
I love the bunny movies, last I checked there weren't that many though...thanks PJ.
Djoser
06-09-2006, 09:33 AM
"That's no ordinary rodent..."
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 09:34 AM
"with big sharp pointy teeth!"
::makes exaggerated crazy hand motions::
man, dont get me started.
Djoser
06-09-2006, 09:38 AM
No, go ahead--that's my favorite movie of all time...
Well, as far as comedies go.
I have a friend named Tim, and whenever I leave a message on his answering machine, I always say:
"There are those who call me...Tim?"
Or "Your a busy man, O Tim"
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 09:42 AM
Then you need to buy your friend Tim THIS:
http://www.entertainmentearth.com/prodinfo.asp?number=TYV15017
I also want the bunny slippers.
Djoser
06-09-2006, 09:47 AM
Wow, that's cool--I should get it for him, and another for myself, lol...
I also am quite fond of Sir Robin's minstrel's song, "He's not afraid to be killed in nasty ways..."
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 09:53 AM
oh, and back OT....
FUCK THE SNORKS.
Djoser
06-09-2006, 09:59 AM
Who the fuck are the Snorks?
I barely know who the Smurfs are, as it is.
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 10:02 AM
Snorks were the B-list afterthought version of the Smurfs, only much more lame, and UNDERWATER.
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:04 AM
A Reading from the Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20:
Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 10:09 AM
"One...Two.....FIVE~! Uh....THREE!!!"
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:10 AM
Who the fuck are the Snorks?
I barely know who the Smurfs are, as it is.
Snorks and their lik are just wrong wrong wrong.
The present Leader of the Snork Lovers lives in Chicago and is pregant as we speak. She will be producing another snork-lover, which cant be a good thing.
maximvsv
06-09-2006, 10:19 AM
Here's the way I see it:
On the why are we here: All of the gadgets you see and every experience you've had with falling objects, pool tables, fire, spilled liquids, and all of the other day to day experiences should have shown you by now that everything is cause and effect and that it is only operating in one direction, relative to time. Noting spontaneously changes direction or turns into a frog or whatever, and people just don't want to believe it applies to each and every molecule everywhere, including in their brains. We're here, because when this universe got started, each and every little energy pulse that became a hydrogen atom and then became something more complex was already on a fixed path to become exactly what it is now, part of your toe, a speck of dust in the air, whatever. Luckily, we don't have a means of perceiving it, but the whole universe is predetermined, including every action each person will ever take and every sound each person will ever utter. That being said, there's no way to determine whether humanity is of any special significance in the whole thing or just there as some sort of complex construction equipment.
What are you supposed to do: You're supposed to exist. Even feeling confused about stuff is built into the process of the track you're on.
I explained it to someone once in the context of the 'first cause' theory of the existence of god. God made you do it, and god made it your fault. It doesn't matter that free will is an illusion, we're still built to perceive it and believe in it and to act as if it's true.
Color: Color is a result of perception. The light frequency reaching your eye from some object or from some direction stimulates one set of optical nerves that handle black and white and degrees of brightness in between. The light frequency also stimulates a second set that is sensitive to red, green and blue frequencies. Now, some objects reflect most of the frequencies of light that bounce onto them, which is how mirrors work. A mirror is not some insubstantial phenomenon, it actually is the colors it bounces, because it bounces them. Likewise, a clear glass is the color of the stuff behind it because it sends those frequencies through, and if you change the background, you change the color of the glass. You perceive one color while someone off to the side will perceive different colors, because the frequencies reaching the other person are different, but that means that the same object has more than one set of colors.
Luckily, most objects absorb enough of the light that hits them to make them appear fixed in color, but if you bounce a high enough concentration of light of one frequency or a number of frequencies off of something, you will see that the absorption capacity gets overloaded and the reflection becomes more and more like the original light source. Point a red laser pointer at a blackboard, and it will still reflect some red.
The sky is blue because of nitrogen content.
Clocks turn clockwise because they are the result of mechanizing sundials developed in the northern hemisphere.
Kids don't come with instruction manuals because they're each custom assembled, and the two who started the process aren't even done the manufacturing process during their lifetimes.
Hurt feelings don't hurt more than physical injury, they just cause more distress because they change the way you think the world is supposed to work and you have to rebuild your set of rules to accommodate. On the other hand, getting bitten by a shark doesn't require much more than (1) getting away from the shark and (2) trying to put the pieces back together before you lose too much blood.
Trix: Trix are for kids because that who the people who make them are making them for. Nobody makes Trix for adolescents or adults.
Smurfs: They reproduced by being repeatedly drawn.
Spoons: Wherever you left them, they either got knocked aside or someone took them. If they aren't within six feet of where you normally keep or wash them (and you may not actually know where you keep them, so that could be the problem), then someone or more people or creatures large enough to move a spoon (like a dog) has moved them.
The six feet part is just an anecdotally perceived radius that seems to be the distance at which most fallen or displaced objects are found. Also, this presupposes you or the people you have around you don't have unexpected habits with regard to spoons, like throwing them out of moving vehicles and such or leaving them in ice cream containers when you throw them away.
damned shit: I don't know. You'd have to be more specific.
high heels: (1) developed over several inventors (2) initially added to boots to make people look more important (because people assign more importance to taller people, which is based on expectations of sanity and resources reflected by healthy growth in a medieval environment. Girls don't have to wear them.
Tree falls: If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, it still makes a sound. I'm not going to research it, but I expect it was originated by a mental health professional to convince someone to stop managing events that were not relevant to his or her higher priority concerns.
Driveway/Parkway: That's George Carlin's isn't it. Anyhow, if you only parked on the driveway, it would accumulate vehicles like some sort of roach motel. You drive on it, too. Some people park on the parkways, too. Regardless, if you aren't using it to drive the vehicle to or from some place, like a garage, it isn't really a driveway. If you simply park a car there, it is a parking space. A parkway is supposed to get you to, from, alongside or through a park.
Hair: Hair on your head is set for a specific size limit, too. Most people find it inconvenient to grow it that long, though.
Snorks: Never met them
fourway: You cannot physically arrive at the same time. Regardless, you can be there close enough to seem simultaneous. Well, the rule is that I go first. Then someone else with less paranoia than sense will start, and how the other drivers' comfort levels allow that to proceed determines who gets through next. Then, the vehicle to the right of the one that just went can go through, then the next person to the right.
Need more? Just ask.
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 10:22 AM
Er.. Thanks? LOL
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:23 AM
Here's the way I see it:
On the why are we here: All of the gadgets you see and every experience you've had with falling objects, pool tables, fire, spilled liquids, and all of the other day to day experiences should have shown you by now that everything is cause and effect and that it is only operating in one direction, relative to time. Noting spontaneously changes direction or turns into a frog or whatever, and people just don't want to believe it applies to each and every molecule everywherte, including in their brains. We're here, because when this universe got started, each and every little energy pulse that became a hydrogen atom and then became something more complex was already on a fixed path to become exactly what it is now, part of your toe, a speck of dust in the air, whatever. Luckily, we don't have a means of perceving it, but the whole universe is predetermined, including every action each person will ever take and every sound each person will ever utter. That being said, there's no way to determine whether humanity is of any special significance in the whole thing or just there as some sort of complex construction equipment.
What are you supposed to do: You're supposed to exist. Even feeling confused about stuff is built into the process of the track you're on.
I explained it to someone once in the context of the 'first cause' theory of the existence of god. God made you do it, and god made it your fault. It doesn't matter that free will is an illusion, we're still built to perceive it and believe in it and to act as if it's true.
Color: Color is a result of perception. The light frequency reaching your eye from some object or from some direction stimulates one set of optical nerves that handle black and white and degrees of brightness in between. The light frequency also stimulates a second set that is sensitive to red, green and blue frequencies. Now, some objects reflect most of the frequencies of light that bounce onto them, which is how mirrors work. A mirror is not some insubstantial phenomenon, it actually is the colors it bounces, because it bounces them. Likewise, a clear glass is the color of the stuff behind it because it sends those frequencies through, and if you change the background, you change the color of the glass. You perceive one color while someone off to the side will perceive different colors, because the frequencies reching the other person are different, but that means that the same object has more than one set of colors.
Luckily, most objects absorb enough of the light that hits them to make them appear fixed in color, but if you bounce a high enough concentration of light of one frequency or a number of frequencies off of something, you will see that the absorption capacity gets overloaded and the reflection becomes more and more like the original light source. Point a red laser pointer at a blackboard, and it will still reflect some red.
The sky is blue because of nitrogen content.
Clocks turn clockwise because they are the result of mechanizing sundials developed in the northern hemisphere.
Kids don't come with instruction manuals because they're each custom assembled, and the two who started the process aren't even done the manufacturing process during their lifetimes.
Hurt feelings don't hurt more than physical injury, they just cause more distress because they change the way you think the world is supposed to work and you have to rebuild your set of rules to accomidate. On the other hand, getting bitten by a shark doesn't require much more than (1) getting away from the shark and (2) trying to put the pieces back together before you lose too much blood.
Trix: Trix are for kids because that who the people who make them are making them for. Nobody makes Trix for adolescents or adults.
Smurfs: They reproduced by being repeatedly drawn.
Spoons: Wherever you left them, they either got knocked aside or someone took them. If they aren't within six feet of where you normally keep or wash them (and you may not actually know where you keep them, so that could be the problem), then someone or more people or creatures large enough to move a spoon (like a dog) has moved them.
The six feet part is just an anecdotally perceived radius that seems to be the distance at which most fallen or displaced objects are found. Also, this presupposes you or the people you have around you don't have unexpected habits with regard to spoons, like throwing them out of moving vehicles and such or leaving them in ice cream containers when you throw them away.
damned shit: I don't know. You'd have to be more specific.
high heels: (1) developed over several inventors (2) initially added to boots to make people look more important (because people assign more importance to taller people, which is based on expectations of sanity and resources reflected by healthy growth in a midieval environment. Girls don't have to wear them.
Tree falls: If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, it still makes a sound. I'm not going to research it, but Iexpect it was originated by a mental health professional to convince someone to stop managing events that were not relevant to his or her higher priority concerns.
Driveway/Parkway: That's George Carlin's isn't it. Anyhow, if you only parked on the driveway, it would accumulate vehicles like some sort of roach motel. You drive on it, too. Some people park on the parkways, too. Regardless, if you aren't using it to drive the vehicle to or from some place, like a garage, it isn't really a driveway. If you simply park a car there, it is a parking space. A parkway is supposed to get you to, from, alongside or through a park.
Hair: Hair on your head is set for a specific size limit, too. Most people find it inconvenient to grow it that long, though.
Snorks: Never met them
fourway: You cannot physically arrive at the same time. Regardless, you can be there close enough to seem simultaneous. Well, the rule is that I go first. Then someone else with less paranoia than sense will start, and how the other drivers' comfort levels allow that to proceed determines who gets through next. Then, the vehicle to the right of the one that just went can go through, then the next person to the right.
Need more? Just ask.
Oh yeah? I disagree.
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 10:27 AM
Oh yeah? I disagree.
:laughing:
Yeah! Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mister!
Jay Zeno
06-09-2006, 10:30 AM
Here's the way I see it:
....
Need more? Just ask.
Which begs, to me, my question:
Why do we make things so difficult for ourselves, as individuals and as a species?;)
Incidentally, I was so completely wrong about something. I thought all this fuss about snorks was about sporks. I kept looking at those funny little plastic picnic implements and thinking, "What the hell kind of a problem do people have with these?"
Sometimes my life is an Emily Litella routine. (Favorite: "endangered feces.")
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 10:34 AM
A lot of people fear the almighty Spork. Sooner or later though, they all come to the darkside and worship it.
doc-catfish
06-09-2006, 10:35 AM
I used to wonder why is it called a blow job when the girl sucks.
Because "suck job" just doesn't sound quite right, even if it is functionally correct.
And the Snorks, those were the archrival red smurfs (http://www.emule-mods.de/extra/RedSmurf.jpg) weren't they? /:O
As for my unanswered questions:
1. What is so wrong with tearing the tag off my mattress?
2. What state is Margaritaville in?
3. Why is there no East Virginia?
4. Are Beer Nuts actually made with beer?
And the one that has been pestering me since I was five...
5. How many licks does it REALLY take to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie Pop? Its like WAY more than three.
:P
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 10:35 AM
Sporks=Good
Snorks=Bad
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:40 AM
Sporks=Good
Snorks=Bad
Snorks being poked by Sporks = Good
Snorks poking Mork from Ork with Sporks and Corks = Bad
maximvsv
06-09-2006, 10:44 AM
Difficult is a condition the observer perceives. We don't make things difficult, we just notice how they require more than passing observation and consideration to understand.
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:47 AM
Difficult is a condition the observer perceives. We don't make things difficult, we just notice how they require more than passing observation and consideration to understand.
This doesnt explain Snorks, you know.
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 10:48 AM
Complete Dorks talking about Snorks and Sporks and Corks and Mork From Ork and Guinea Pigs Are Neither Italian Nor Pork=Amusing
Jay Zeno
06-09-2006, 10:51 AM
We don't make things difficult...Damn, then I've been observing the wrong species.
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 10:54 AM
Damn, then I've been observing the wrong species.
Observing Snorks by mistake, are we, JZ?
Mastridonicus
06-09-2006, 10:58 AM
In my experience,
both Snorks AND Sporks are lethal.
Pending lawsuit on one.
Regardless, PJ, I'd like to buy an argument please.
MrChristopher
06-09-2006, 11:05 AM
Piss off, you manky scotch git!
Oh...you wanted Arguments...sorry...this is Abuse. Try next door.
Prester_John
06-09-2006, 11:15 AM
In my experience,
both Snorks AND Sporks are lethal.
Pending lawsuit on one.
Regardless, PJ, I'd like to buy an argument please.
Dont give me that, you snotty faced heap of parrot droppings. Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed, maloderous, pervert!
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 11:25 AM
Complete Dorks talking about Snorks and Sporks and Corks and Mork From Ork and Guinea Pigs Are Neither Italian Nor Pork=Amusing
You're so strange.
;D
How long did it take you to rhyme all that?
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 11:25 AM
Dont give me that, you snotty faced heap of parrot droppings. Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed, maloderous, pervert!
::swoons over to PJ::
ME NEXT ME NEXT!
lunchbox
06-09-2006, 11:40 AM
Tree falls: If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, it still makes a sound. I'm not going to research it, but I expect it was originated by a mental health professional to convince someone to stop managing events that were not relevant to his or her higher priority concerns.
My stance is a technicality, sound is only in your head. Something does not make a sound if nothing is there to hear it, all it does is produce vibrations. So if even just a cricket is nearby that is capable of registering that frequency, there is sound. If nothing is, there is no sound.
Driveway/Parkway: That's George Carlin's isn't it.
Gallagher
lunchbox
06-09-2006, 11:46 AM
Because "suck job" just doesn't sound quite right, even if it is functionally correct.
There are a few theories. I'm of the belief it was shortened from 'below job'
that one and others on wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oral_sex#Terminology_and_slang
Bridgette
06-09-2006, 12:17 PM
My stance is a technicality, sound is only in your head. Something does not make a sound if nothing is there to hear it, all it does is produce vibrations. So if even just a cricket is nearby that is capable of registering that frequency, there is sound. If nothing is, there is no sound.
Gallagher
Uh, that's not a technicality, that's a basic Philosophy 101 question. TECHNICALLY, the simple fact that no one is there to hear it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. The very definition of sound is vibration, so TECHNICALLY it exists whether you hear it or not. PHILOSOPHICALLY, one might argue that if no other being is there to recognize the existence of something, it might not actually exist. But we could never really know for sure. So the guy stranded on a desert island might not exist to the rest of the world, but he damn sure exists to himself ::) But anyway, it boils down to how we define existence. Does it have to be recognized by other(s) in order to really exist?? :D
Sirona
06-09-2006, 01:13 PM
If chocolate chip cookies have chocolate chips in them and peanut butter cookies have peanut butter in them do Girl Scout cookies have Girl Scouts in them? Is that why you can only get them for such a short time each year? You can only cull so many Girl Scouts from the herd before it's noticed?
lunchbox
06-09-2006, 01:43 PM
I checked the definition, you're right. I disagree with it, but noone asked me when they decided to define it in such a way.
Bridgette
06-09-2006, 01:53 PM
Well I am glad you saw the error of your ways, but I was hoping for more discussion on the whole existence thing :P ;D
Rhiannon
06-09-2006, 03:15 PM
If chocolate chip cookies have chocolate chips in them and peanut butter cookies have peanut butter in them do Girl Scout cookies have Girl Scouts in them? Is that why you can only get them for such a short time each year? You can only cull so many Girl Scouts from the herd before it's noticed?
Heh.. My Brother-In-Law went off one day about how he was going to write the company and complain about false advertising because no where in the ingredients does it list "Girl Scouts". He was going to do the same with baby food and dog food.
Nicolina
06-09-2006, 04:36 PM
if a tree falls in the forest and no one is there i hear it, does it make a sound? and really now, who thought up that question?!
Wasn't it a Zen koan?
maximvsv
06-10-2006, 01:03 PM
My stance is a technicality, sound is only in your head. Something does not make a sound if nothing is there to hear it, all it does is produce vibrations. So if even just a cricket is nearby that is capable of registering that frequency, there is sound. If nothing is, there is no sound.
Uh, that's not a technicality, that's a basic Philosophy 101 question. TECHNICALLY, the simple fact that no one is there to hear it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. The very definition of sound is vibration, so TECHNICALLY it exists whether you hear it or not. PHILOSOPHICALLY, one might argue that if no other being is there to recognize the existence of something, it might not actually exist. But we could never really know for sure. So the guy stranded on a desert island might not exist to the rest of the world, but he damn sure exists to himself ::) But anyway, it boils down to how we define existence. Does it have to be recognized by other(s) in order to really exist?? :D
Sound is a particular range of vibration of physical objects, like light is a particular band of frequencies in which photons can exist.
Bertrand Russell's philosophy is that existence is perception, which leads to his (?) theory of the existence of god because things remain even after you leave the room and forget about them.
Djoser
06-10-2006, 10:07 PM
Well I am glad you saw the error of your ways, but I was hoping for more discussion on the whole existence thing :P ;D
"To be is to do" Socrates
"To do is to be" Sartre
"Do be do be do" Frank Sinatra
Wwanderer
06-11-2006, 01:50 AM
Wasn't it a Zen koan?
Nope, a British theologian I believe.
-Ww
Bridgette
06-11-2006, 02:35 AM
LOL DJ ;D
There was once a guy called DoBeDo because of that song and his pot-smoking. hehe
Maxim, that's cool, but still just one person's theory. I reckon we all choose how we define existence on the philosophical level :P
Djoser
06-11-2006, 03:38 AM
I can't take credit for that little gem--I saw it as graffiti in a bathroom at my college--and found out later it was Kurt Vonnegut who made it up (though of course the philosophers in question did propose what they are credited as saying).
I guess ol' Kurt went to my college, so it makes sense--though I'm sure it wasn't him who wrote that in that bathroom, he went there long before I did!
ChristyWild
06-11-2006, 09:56 AM
Why is it children under the age of 8 never seem to sleep- only recharge??
kdogg247
06-12-2006, 09:00 AM
If a man says something in the forest and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?
(Stolen from another SWer, although I forget who said it.)
slickntatted
06-17-2012, 09:02 AM
Yours are fake. They r big because you paid for them. I should know. Been all up in them!