View Full Version : Ladies - theoretical worst customer?
maximvsv
04-20-2006, 01:47 PM
But even worse, are the guys who argue with me about how much they owe me, or even if they should pay anything at all for the couch dances, AFTER I specifically told them the prices and asked them if they wanted to continue to the subsequent dances after the first one; the guy's trying to get away with a freebie. Some girls deceive guys and keep them back in the couch room as long as they can without telling them what # dance they're on, but I NEVER do, I'm one of the few honest/upfront dancers! So to be purposely falsely accused by the guy of me trying to deceive him, just infuriates me.
Here's something to consider. I don't know which dancer you are, but I've been to Oasis. Just this week, I was getting dances from both Tyler and Krista, so, as you know, that's going to be around $40 per song (sometimes, I'll pay the doorman's fee, too). I've been hanging around places like these for around eleven years now, so I can not only keep track of the number of songs being played, but even the dancer rotation to let a dancer know if she's going to be called up again soon (in case she needs to pay the DJ to skip her or has some other schduling issue). Anyhow, the actual song length does not match the minutes per song number the doorman uses, and he is apt to add a couple in when asked.
That time around, the actual number of songs played was three. The doorman called it four from off the clock.
So, if you relied on the doorman to keep track of the number of dances, it's quite possible the customer will be concerned that he's being lied to.
I'm sure there are customers out there looking to scam their way out of paying, and I certainly wouldn't condone that. I'm just saying you might want to keep that in mind.
Emily
04-20-2006, 02:10 PM
Oasis is one of the clubs that does a dance as 4 minutes instead of a song. it says this at the entrance of the couch room. There are clocks all over the room. The door man writes down the time you entered and the time you get up. How can there be any confusion? This is probably the most honest system I've ever seen!
Also, a dance is $20 per song there (also posted.) And a dancer doesn't have to pay the DJ to skip her there....just FYI. Sounds like someone might be taking advantage of you.
What phillydancer is tlaking about is an unfortunate circumstance where the guy buys multiple dances, knowing he's getting mults, and acts like it's one. Or maybe he honestly doesn't realize it and tries to spin it around like you are the scam artist. THAT I hate.
maximvsv
04-20-2006, 03:48 PM
The only clock I saw was up next toi the doorman, which a customer can't see from all but two of the couches. As for the time versus songs sign, maybe someone took it down, I'll look for it again, but I didn't see one when I was there.
As for the skip situation, the only time the dancer asked me for money for that was when she was at Delilah's, where they do charge the dancers for it. As for whether she's taking advantage, she was, but I'm okay with it anyway.
TaLlOnE
04-20-2006, 05:12 PM
he has a hair trigger and didn't have the courtesy to tell me to get up, or to put a condom on beforehand
he wants to inform me about the impending threat of a hostile alien (from mars) take over, then tell me how i can avoid it by running away with him to (insert name of current drug capital here)
he has trouble with bladder control
he not only makes a mess around song 2, but informs me he has herpes
he starts a fight with the other guys who want my attention
he throws beer at my best girl
he bites the bouncer
was this ALL one guy?? /:O LOL
red red red
04-22-2006, 11:28 AM
The only clock I saw was up next toi the doorman, which a customer can't see from all but two of the couches. As for the time versus songs sign, maybe someone took it down, I'll look for it again, but I didn't see one when I was there.
If precision of time is really that big of an issue, we could all start doing what one infamous former Wizzards dancer used to do--buy a little timer and set it up next to the couch so it buzzes when the four minutes are up!
onlythebest
04-22-2006, 12:07 PM
I don't know if this has been said yet,but I hate customers that try to push your limits and is being cheap in the process.I.E. he tries grabbing and talking you into "extras" but he doesn't want to cough up the dough for you putting up with his moronic *ss.I don't do "extras" so stop trying.
maximvsv
04-23-2006, 06:14 AM
If precision of time is really that big of an issue, we could all start doing what one infamous former Wizzards dancer used to do--buy a little timer and set it up next to the couch so it buzzes when the four minutes are up!
You're missing the point, which is that someone who is expecting the time to be measured by the number of songs is going to feel taken advantage of when the clock measurement differs from that expectation. So, it's possible the customer has a reason for his point of view.
cinammonkisses
04-23-2006, 08:41 AM
I hated the guys that used to tell me, "You're too beautiful to be doing this!!"
I just wondered...would they prefer to have some fat, ugly, trollish looking woman dancing for them?
I get that too from customers. I started asking them, "so isnt' that the reason you come to stripclubs..to see beautiful girls? If I and the rest of the pretty girls weren't here, then you'd be complaining about how ugly the girls are right?" Then they shut up.
red red red
04-23-2006, 05:10 PM
You're missing the point, which is that someone who is expecting the time to be measured by the number of songs is going to feel taken advantage of when the clock measurement differs from that expectation. So, it's possible the customer has a reason for his point of view.
I get the point. I'm just at a loss as to what the dancer is supposed to do about this problem, short of setting up a little timer next to the couch. My point in intially commenting on this was that a four-minute dance is the same length if not longer than a one-song dance anyway, unless the DJ is playing Freebird or something. There shouldn't be much cause for customer dismay over a disputed 15 seconds.
poriland4
04-24-2006, 07:42 AM
The worst customer is the one that bring his wife to the club to show she is better looking than you.....
PhillyDancer1982
04-24-2006, 02:29 PM
What I originally meant by customers who argue with me over the number of couch dances I did, goes like this:
1.) One time, I was giving this slick foreigner(French, I think) dude a dance. I specifically asked him if he wanted a second one, he mumbled like he was indecisive, so I repeated the question, and made sure I got a very affirmative "yes" before continuing. Then after the 2 dances, when we stood up and I collected my $40 from him, he chose that time to say "no, we only did ONE dance" AFTER he'd agreed to the prices and to go on. Basically he was trying to fool me intentionally. He then reached out and grabbed back his money, out of my hands! I had to get the management to deal with him and get my money back. This WAS intentional by the guy. Apparently other girls had complained that he was trying to touch them inappropriately and pull over slick moves, so not long after my experience with him, he got kicked out.
2.) One time, there was a fat rich dude who brought his barely-21, very hot little blonde son with him to the club(along with many of his old-guy friends). The son agreed to a couch dance with me and it was agreed that his dad would pay for it. Well after the dance ends, the son says "let me go get the money from my dad" then returns with only $5! Then the fat dad refused to pay for it and also insulted me in front of everyone! At first I was steamed and didn't do anything but sneer "hmmph, SLUT!" at the father as I stormed away, but later I told a bouncer and the bouncer questioned the father and son. Do you believe that the son tried to claim that I'd promised him a lapdance for free?? The bouncers knew the kid was full of shit, and also figured that the father probably told the kid to say that. Like father like son, and the father was a stereotypical "scumbag" who probably spends too much time in casinos and too much money on hookers. Earlier the dad lied to me by saying he had no more money, but I saw him tipping all the other girls generously MINUTES AFTER HE SAID THAT. Eventually they got my remaining $15 to me.
THATS what I meant...intentional "theft". I try not to overcharge customers and watch the clock as best as I can. HOWEVER one annoying thing that I noticed about the couch room is, when the dude monitoring the couchroom doesn't pay attention, or tries to charge you for an extra dance when you go only 15sec over!! >:( That ESPECIALLY happened at Wizzards, where the bouncers didn't sit in the couch room, so it was easy for them to miscalculate the time the girl actually did the dance, since it takes some time for the girl to get dressed and walk outta the length-longways couchroom.
PhillyDancer1982
04-24-2006, 02:30 PM
And yes, that is correct...I DID refer to the fat father as a "slut." Yes, guys can be sluts too. Hahaha that rich middle-aged dude was called a slut by a stripper sucks for him haha.
Gia2608
04-24-2006, 02:44 PM
LOL this is so funny! I think I've dealt with every one of these guys. Someone stole my gown one time when we were in the champagne room (I got up to go pee and walked to the ladies room in just my thong and shoes- I dunno why I did that I just wasn't thinking I guess) I got back and he and my gown were gone! A thong or bikini top is one thing, but a floor-length snake skin gown? What is he going to do with it and how did the bouncers not see him leave with it!
Someone at the Cheetah once asked me if my dad had molested me. I dumped the champagne bucket over his f'n head!
Guys that obviously have never touched a breast before that think because you've pried twenty fucking dollars from they're chubby little fingers they can squeeze your tits so hard you're worried they'll rupture.
Also, I work at a club where there is a lot of extras going on (LIke most clubs down here!) SO my favorite is the guy that just diesn't beleive/comprehend that I'm not going to have sex with them, they ask how much and I tell them NO. and then they offer me an amount of money ($300 or something equally as ridiculous) and I tell them $24,000.
maximvsv
04-25-2006, 02:44 AM
I get the point. I'm just at a loss as to what the dancer is supposed to do about this problem, short of setting up a little timer next to the couch. My point in intially commenting on this was that a four-minute dance is the same length if not longer than a one-song dance anyway, unless the DJ is playing Freebird or something. There shouldn't be much cause for customer dismay over a disputed 15 seconds.
So, now you want the customer to be rational, too?
Seriously, though, in that sort of situation, a dancer should decide for herself what she wants to do.
Straying back to the topic, I'm pointing out that there can be a reason for this sort of dispute, to begin with.
As for the people in PD1982's follow-ups, yeah, those people deserve derision.
sexysweet
04-25-2006, 06:09 AM
I hate the men who tell you all about their million dollar summer home in N. Carolina, and their million dollar winter home in Fl. blah, blah, blah.
All the while trying to buy me 5 shots at a time but when I ask for a dance (after 20 minutes of above BS) He says "just stay here with me I'll take care of you" at which time he slips a whole $5 in my garter, and then proceeds to try to talk me into leaving because we would have so much more fun OTC.
F#
[email protected] off you cheap bastard.
PhillyDancer1982
04-25-2006, 10:12 AM
I hate the men who tell you all about their million dollar summer home in N. Carolina, and their million dollar winter home in Fl. blah, blah, blah.
Haha that reminds me of this dumb Indian guy who comes to Oasis sometimes. Every time I walk around the inside of the bar for tips, he stops to tell me that I shouldn't wear so much heavy eye make-up(even though a lot of guys compliment my eye make-up and tell me that it accentuates my beautiful blue-green eyes!!). Sometimes he goes on and on, and it's kinda annoying because I don't wanna get lessons on how to do my make-up when I know what makes me money. So one night he was there, and my 2nd round inside the bar running into him again, he repeats the shit about the eye make-up for the SECOND time that night and goes on and on. I put my boobs together as a hint for a dollar, and he says blandly "I ran outta change" yet he keeps talking on and on about my fucking eye make-up! :headache: WHY THE HELL WOULD I WANNA STICK AROUND, AFTER HE ALREADY USED UP A FEW MINS TALKING, TO HEAR HIM CRITICIZE MY MAKE-UP IF HE ISN'T EVEN TIPPING??? I started making suggestions, such as "what would you do if I removed my eye make-up?" or "how about I remove my eye make-up, if you agree we have some fun in the champagne room afterwards?" and he simply ignored me and rambled on! As the little birdie would say, "cheep cheep!"
Well, my very rich male friend/customer was sitting next to the Indian. Meanwhile the Indian was bragging to my friend about how he's "worth 46 million dollars," blah blah blah, more bullshit, and how he "knows how to treat a lady right." Then if the Indian's really worth $46million, then why was he bumming $1 bills off my friend for the rest of the night?? And he obviously did NOT know how to treat a lady right, because according to my friend, he was giving the constructive criticism preaches to more than a few other girls as they walked by. What a LOSER! Next time he comes in, I gotta think of a sharp not-so-nice comeback to say to him!
What was he thinking? Only a girl with low self-esteem would stick around to hear his "constructive criticism" for no tip. And most strippers in the industry are not just confident, but overconfident and conceited!! Conceited strippers would NEVER believe the words from some non-tipper, they'd be thinking "well, the way I look has made me so much money here from all these other customers, and this guy isn't tipping anything." If the Indian wants to find low-confident girls who would put up with his bullshit, why don't he check out the local McDonalds or unemployment office?...I'm sure he'd find a lotta low-confident, not-so-great-looking girls there.
PhillyDancer1982
04-25-2006, 10:15 AM
And by the way, maximvsv...you're a BUTT-HEAD lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (inside joke)
:butthead: :butthead: :butthead:
Come on, you know you like it!! ;D
xoxoGracexoxo
04-25-2006, 12:19 PM
I think I had my theortetical worst customer last night, actually. This guy was over the top. All the classic nasty customer moves, with some I'd never seen before -- repeatedly tried to jerk down my thong (it's a topless club), flipped me over during a couch dance and tried to lay on top of me, tried to lick me, literally twisted my arm while I was trying to get off his lap where he had pulled me, offered to give me a line of coke "as long as your arm", tried constantly to get me to leave the club with him. It was a slow night, so I was more or less putting up with this, but I finally had enough when he told me he wanted to "rape me." I called things off, and asked to be paid. He tried to give me $8 for five dances and acted like I was the asshole when I insisted on getting ALL my money. Claimed to be best friends with the manager, using his first name like this was going to intimidate me. (How hard is it to know the manager's first name? He introduces himself to people, for God's sake.) On the other hand, it was my decision to put up with all of his bullshit, because it was a slow. I finally got my money and even went on to have a decent night, but damn.
sexysweet
04-26-2006, 05:13 AM
You reminded me of the other ass holes who try to get extras by saying "really I am good friends with the owner, it's O.K. to give ME a blow job" ::)
Sinful333
04-29-2006, 07:39 PM
I have a hard time with some customers here is my list...
-Grabbing my leg/foot/shoe while I am on stage to get my attention. The last time this happened I kicked the guy in the face.
-Calling me over for a dance, forcefully pulling me down onto their lap and saying, "Can you feel that, I came while you were on stage." This guy... I FREAKED washed my backside and legs with bleach water and then charged him 100.00 for sitting on his lap.
-Getting a dance, approving of another and another... but his 4 stupid freakish friends are gathered around giving the guy "knuckles" while I am trying to work.
-Requesting a dance, then disapprove of the song.... and the next song and the next song, until either you leave with their money or just dance in front of them. Don't they know time is money.
-Being called giant/beam pole/tall bitch by someone who is 5' nothing. Being 5'10 flat footed, really gives guys short man syndrome when I have my shoes on.
-Guys trying to get me drunk at work. (I limit myself to two drinks a night), then the bartender starts giving me water shots or just plain pepsi. I should get a kick back on that money they spend, damnit!
-Guys asking me, what does your mother think about you doing this job. My response is always the same... she thinks its great that there are men like you out there willing to put my ass threw school.
I could go on and on...
Sin-
Pretty_Penny
04-30-2006, 04:19 PM
he would have all of these HATED characteristics
-smell bad/have bad breath
-be overly touchy and aggressive
-say assholish rude comments, or otherwise be an arrogant fuck
-be cheap
-smoke cigars
Mastridonicus
04-30-2006, 04:34 PM
Ladies and Gentlemen,
Meet Mast.
I wash about 4 times a month, and I eat pizza 4 times a day.
I'd say I have a bad complexion but when I laugh the only victims are my neck pimples.
I believe I am attractive and I know you like bigger men, so I would say you'd hate me touching you, but you'd want it anyways. I mean c'mon look at me, MY MILKSHAKE is what brings the boys to the yard ladies. Sorry. If you don't like that then I'll introduce you to Mast's pimp hand, tho using it ends in heavy breathing and since I havn't brushed this week I'm a little self concious about my breath.
I always ALWAYS am good to my girls in the tips area, I mean, what dancer DOESN'T have a good use for Sunday paper coupons and Free Door Passes. But still, I believe change is better spent at the tip rail than in the dj booth getting a little somethin somethin.
Not only do I smoke cigars, but I have a pet name for my ATF "Ash Tray"
^^^ Now THAT would make me the worst customer ever!
Where do I come up with this stuff.
NoCoverLover
05-01-2006, 05:35 PM
Dragon breath havin, non-stop spray/blow talkin, thin short sportin, I'm-a-DOCTOR-and-I've-got-3-fancy-houses-and-5-fancy-cars-and-I-wanna-take-you-away-from-all-this bullshit braggin, loud-mouth heavy drinkin, I-don't-go-to-THESE-places, one-dance buyin, actin like it KILLS him to hand over the money for one goddam dance piece of shit who tells me my job isn't a fucken job and thinks if he pulls this shit on enough strippers, one of us will fall for it and fuck him for free.
Yes I've had guys who did ALL of the above! :beat:
For the girl you has to sit with that loser, it's anything but funny...
But that description of it sure as hell is!!!
:rotfl::rotfl:
Nakedtruth
05-02-2006, 01:11 AM
Very drunk guy buys a table dance (THANK GOD not a lap dance), half way through the dance turns his head and pukes against the wall- thankfully not on me.
Customer: "I have another dollar for you, but if you want it you have to get on all fours", then "tickles" my butt with his $1. I told him to f* himself, grabbed his buck and walked away.
Customer comes up to the stage while I am dancing for another custie, and, surprise attack! he reachs up between my legs and grabs my (naked) crotch. I wasn't quick enough to stop him but did manage to avoid his getting any further (i.e. slipping a finger in).
Guys who try to pull out their dick during a lapdance. This guy whips it out while I am facing away, I hear the zip and turn around, ask him wtf he thinks he is doing. The guy has the nerve to ORDER me to suck it, then tries to refuse to pay me because I won't. He actually tried to push past me out of the ld area when I blocked the door!
Custy gets off on the second song, no warning, thin pants and apparently commando. His jizz gets all over me. GROSS!! I tell him he owes me extra since he got off and got it all over me and my g-string. SOB has the balls to tell me I should tip *him* since he has to go home and change now!! Bad enough that this is scary and gross, he has to be an asshole too?
georgiapeach
05-02-2006, 06:37 AM
in just a month i've had guys ask me if i was able to read, yell at me for spending all my time dancing with my favorite regular instead of him (after the bartender had to threaten to throw him out for not even buying a drink), tell me that my college education was worthless, try to put their hands down the front of my panties (it's a no touch club), try to follow me home, tell me about having anal sex with lesbians and throw up on me. they were all pretty bad on their own - put them together and they'd be a nightmare! :O
Stringer
05-03-2006, 01:30 AM
and #2 does every one know who the little old man on the six flags commercial whos dancing around thick glasses no teeth... bald... well I had a custy who looked just like him and he would spit when he talked and I would have to keep a napkin over my drink to keep him from spitting in it ( i did try to keep holding it but he insisted i placed it on the table ) he liked to wear womans cloths .....he was scarry
OMG! lol
thechaosfairy
05-03-2006, 04:13 AM
Gawd. Yeah, mr. say-it-don't-spray-it drives me mad.
I can't figure out this one customer. Half the time he's trying to impress me and telling me he's rich and is gonna buy land, and tipping me heavily. The other half, like today, he's getting in my personal space, SPPPPITTING his words (yuck! I had to abandon my coffee), and trying to play stupid head games that seem to be totally random, while NOT TIPPING A DIME. I think maybe he's a bit off in the head.
I also (had) this stage-tipping regular who I've decided just isn't worth it. Every time he comes in he talks in this nasal, garbled voice about how his next door neighbor is watching him get dressed because she likes to watch, and how he's going to sue her. (He's over sixty.) Then in the next breath he invites me to go to a nude beach with him. It's very obvious that he has some kind of paranoid fetish fantasy and can't help but bring it up EVERY GODDAMN TWO MINUTES. Nowadays I'm just going to say "hi" and "Yeah" and ignore him totally otherwise. It's too fucking much of an effort to respond to him: I have to get him to repeat himself every other sentence because he talks like his mouth is full of marbles.