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bella622
11-22-2005, 11:03 AM
Is management playing on a full deck? for real. How can management not realize there is something wrong with the girl and allow her to go back out there.

Because they are counting on her looks and not her brains... They for the most part don't have to interact with her... As long as she looks good and can make the club money I think most managers are willing to roll the dice to a certain point. Sad...

TrewJewel
02-14-2006, 12:44 AM
Oh yeah.. I've got one of those at my club. Funniest things I've ever heard her say during conversation...
"Today sucked. I'm going to go home and take a nap. Then I'm going to come back and work a midnight til 4. How many hours is that?" ........I couldn't not laugh. But then she seriously looked at me puzzled, "No, seriously.. how many is it?"

songofthesword
02-27-2006, 11:32 PM
well, and I hate to say this, but my ex of a year was a dancer, and I love her to death, but in all honestly, she wasn't in line when god was passing out smarts... she was not dumb, she just said dumb shit all the time.

One day we were talking about the bible and I was encourged that she wanted to start to read the bible... so trying to make a good normal conversation, I ask her a simple question.. what version of the bible she has...

if she honestly didn't know, that's all she had to say.. but no... she tells me, she has the Old Testiment, but she has to go out and buy the New Testiment.

so I am like "damn... you can buy the two seperate?" I am really thinking.. then I"m like.. wait a minute.. and I ask her what is the difference between the two.

So she tells me that "the New Testiment is an updated version of the old testiment".. and then what made it so bad, she had the nevre to say "duh" and then say " I can't believe you didn't know that"

What makes it even worse.. I am an athiest, and here I am, teaching her the difference between the old and the new testiment of the bible.

One day she cooked me some Hamburger Helper, and I admit.. it's pretty damn good... so I swollow something and I start to choke, like seriously.. it was something pretty damn big

so she has to come over and pull me on a chair and pump whatever it was out of my throat.

Why was there a BOLT in my food? and it wasn't a small bolt either... don't even ask me how a bolt got into my food

Well, we aren't together now for a reason

Deogol
02-28-2006, 12:13 AM
There is a theory that one can tell how much "lugagge" a dancer is carrying in her head by the amount of luggage she pulls behind her into the dressing room.

Songofthesword's gal must have had a full blown closet on wheels!

mollyzmoon
02-28-2006, 01:42 PM
There's one dayshift girl I occasionally work with, and a sweet kid, but gawd. Sometimes it's the french language barrier, I'm sure, but still...She got off stage and was all concerned that she was dying. She was out of breath and had been drinking a lot...the way she described what she was feeling, I said "oh, that's just a little indigestion, it's ok". She kept rubbing her esophagus and I said, "yeah, maybe a little heartburn" and she freaked. I had to show her where on her physical person her heart is, and where her stomach is, and where her throat is. It took a good long while to explain that she was not having a heart attack, with me placing her hand over her ribcage and saying "ici! ca c'est ta couer! pas ici!". I found out later, she is always asking for an ambulance when she's got a little smoker's cough.

TifaRae
02-28-2006, 01:45 PM
I have a friend... sweetest girl, but not too bright.

She thinks you can go to Stanford for $5,000 total for four years w/o a scholarship.

I went to South Africa with this girl this summer, and she told me that because Rand is a 6 times conversion rate to the American dollar, my $200 would be equivalent to $1,200. I tried to explain exchange rate vs. economic buying power but to no avail.

When she got back to school in the fall, she was talking about her trip, and in a tone of utter surprise, said, "There are a lot of black people over there."

ANd that's just to name a few instances. :D

cinammonkisses
02-28-2006, 02:11 PM
I worked with a girl who was on her period, mind you she wasn't usually so dim. After putting in a tampon she shouted to anyone and asked for scissors but no one had a pair. She grabs a lighter and lights the string on fire, need I say more? YES... she runs out of the open stall patting her recently singed kitty!!!

I'm gonna pray for that girl. She is definately not wrapped to tight. ::)

greenidlady1
02-28-2006, 02:56 PM
We have had a few of "those" come through the door and suprisingly enough they tend to make money. I think some guys feed of these types of girls. I think some of them probably can't get a job elsewhere because they don't have all of their marbles in a row. One girl who has worked at the club on and off claims to have had a brain injury from a car accident. While I think some of them have fucked their own brains up by using too many drugs. Oh, well, I just tend to ignore them and I try to carry on.

greenidlady1
02-28-2006, 03:00 PM
One of my favorite comments from her was that I was thinking of going to Europe, and the UK in particular at one point, and she butts into the conversation saying how great it would be to travel, but I did have a good reliable car, so going to England should be easy for me ::)

Priceless, Lmao :laughing:

greenidlady1
02-28-2006, 03:06 PM
All this tampon talk reminds me of the first time I used a tampon. My period came and I was at swim team. I was planning on sitting out but they were playing waterpolo that day and I really didn't want to miss out on the fun. So I got a tampon from one of my friend's moms and attempted to use it. I thought it was the most uncomfortable thing in the world and when I got home I told my mom about it. She then informed me that I wasn't supposed to leave the applicator in as well!

Oh and I was 11 at the time.

I actually did the same thing and was 12 but my mom never told me what a period was either until I pulled my panties down, saw blood and start screaming.

greenidlady1
02-28-2006, 03:15 PM
I worked with a girl who was on her period, mind you she wasn't usually so dim. After putting in a tampon she shouted to anyone and asked for scissors but no one had a pair. She grabs a lighter and lights the string on fire, need I say more? YES... she runs out of the open stall patting her recently singed kitty!!!


I literally just slightly pissed my pants, LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BrittaneeDreame
02-28-2006, 05:06 PM
There was this new girl who came running over to me in the dressing room because she'd heard I was a lesbian and "God made man and women to go together, you can tell cause penis' fit in vaginas, and you're going to hell!" I told her that I didn't believe in hell, and she was just like, "oh." I should have left it there, but I'm a bitch sometimes. So I said, "dancing must be hard for you, with all this sinning" and she burst into tears. Apparently all the sinning was hard for her, and she was so glad someone finally understands, cause her ex-husband/boyfriend who makes her do this doesn't understand. Oookay. Then she starts telling me about God, and the Angels. She needs the Angels, cause she hears voices and sees things that aren't real, and she's supposed to take medication for being schizophrenic, but schizpohrenia is a gift from God so she can't take the drugs, and the Angels help her know whats real and what isn't.

The scary thing is she lasted a couple months.

Omygosh, omygosh, omygosh, this is the only one that made me laugh. oh gosh everybody in my dorm building probably thinks im crazy. hahahhahah oh goodness...

Gia2608
03-02-2006, 05:43 PM
There is a girl at my club that is so freakin' out there, I've often wondered if she's slow and I don't know why anyone lets her work at the club. One day she was coming in at the same time as me and I glanced at the marquis and said (aloud but to no one in particular) "Shit! I forgot there was a feature here tonight" and she said to me "a future? what's a future?''. It was a.) ubsurdly stupid that she is a NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKER could look at the word "feature" in writing and still think it said "future" and b.) was incredibly ironic that she would ask me what a future was because I laughed (so the valet could hear) and said:for "you...this," as I opened the door to the club. She looked at me completely bewildered but it was funny. She also watches everything the other girls do when they get ready and asks questions about make-up that my eleven year old sister would know (ex. "what are you doing that for?" when someone uses concealer).

April_B
03-03-2006, 04:02 AM
hahaha.

I had a friend who worked with a girl at a toy store who was a bit thick. One night when they were cleaning the shop she was sweeping and announced loudly :"I wish someone would invent a broom that sucked up the dirt!"
Everyone around her calmly explained that someone, in fact, had. It was called a vaccum cleaned.

Then at a party one night, after quite a few drinks one of my friends said: "wouldn't it be good if there were pills you could take instead of having to drink?" One of the guys laughed and explained to her what drugs were. Whoops!


I feel bad for the guys watching at girl with the blood pouring down her legs. I mean, what would you do?? Would you say something to her?
I'd be too embarrassed for her...

sexysweet
03-03-2006, 08:14 AM
There is a girl I work with who is very young, and beautiful, but not all that intelligent. My favorite line from her is when she was trying to tell me about something she saw on an autopsy show(one of the HBO specials) anyway she says " the body was already in metamorphosis when they found it" .To which I replied you mean rigor mortis? and she said ya same thing. It still makes me laugh! ;D

sexy_celeste
03-03-2006, 08:23 AM
There is a girl I work with who is very young, and beautiful, but not all that intelligent. My favorite line from her is when she was trying to tell me about something she saw on an autopsy show(one of the HBO specials) anyway she says " the body was already in metamorphosis when they found it" .To which I replied you mean rigor mortis? and she said ya same thing. It still makes me laugh! ;D


Thats so cute!

WickedNYGirl
03-04-2006, 01:51 PM
I've had a few "Jessica Simpson" moments myself. But nothing as bad some of these stories. I love this thread!!!!!!!!! :-)

northy
03-04-2006, 03:58 PM
Agreed... Book Smarts vs. Common Sense

My cousin is almost too smart... He got a full ride to MIT and he and I can't sit down and have a "normal" conversation about anything. It's kinda sad...

What is sadder is that there is an actual term for these sort of people. They are classified as intellectual idiots. They have no idea of the world outside their area of speciality.

Alexus
03-04-2006, 04:27 PM
The chick who's father would bring her to and from work...(I wrote about her before). Once caught all of us girls talking about school. And she just butts in our conversation and says "If I don't pay my car bill for a few months. Will they take my car away? My dad told me to ask you guys." We were like WTF?

The same chick, once got her period at work. So she put a HUGE pad on her tiny little thong. Then STILL PROCEEDED TO UNDRESS ON STAGE all the way NUDE!!!! Then while she was dancing and blood was coming down her leg. She just wipes it up with her hand. :ill: It was too gross. I felt bad and told her about using tampons. Her next stage set she took off her bottoms once again only to spread her legs and say "Amaya is this right?" She didn't even have the tampon all the way in. Just the tip was in and the string was hanging out for all to see!!!!

LMAO...I couldn't believe someone can be so dumb.


That is SICK the girl must have had something horribly wrong with her like her dad and her lived in a cardboard box til she was old enough to strip

bella622
03-05-2006, 09:17 AM
What is sadder is that there is an actual term for these sort of people. They are classified as intellectual idiots. They have no idea of the world outside their area of speciality.


That is fu*cking heeeeeelarious!!!! :P :D :P :D

redvelvetrose
03-05-2006, 01:52 PM
I once worked at a supper club with a girl who didn't know what Ethiopia is.
She also was afraid to go in the basement because it was supposedly haunted.
My favorite quote of hers is, "Does anyone here, like, read books?"

redvelvetrose
03-05-2006, 02:08 PM
She thinks you can go to Stanford for $5,000 total for four years w/o a scholarship.


Hell, if that's the case, why am I wasting $10,000 a year to go to a UW school?

Tart
03-05-2006, 02:53 PM
One more for the period stories;

This girl missed a day of work without a doctors note and got fined. She was upset and yelling about it. The manager told her if she had a Dr's note the fine would be romoved. She said "You don't go to the dr for your period". I of course had to ask her why she couldn't work on her period. She said " I don't wear tampons, I put my period in a jar and use it for bait for deer hunting." WTF!

We had another girl who wouldn't do lap dances because it "steals the soul". She finally started doing her verions of them after management talked to her. She would tie the guys hands up, clip his fingernails and keep them, then light matches in their face! She also wore fuzzy earmuffs on stage for some reason.

Holy mother of god. I would pay just to sit and look at these girls lol.

Tart
03-05-2006, 03:05 PM
The dumbest dancers i've met ...

One at the bluemoon up in Ny ( total nasty dive. ) a girl was in the dressing room talking about how she couldnt wait to get a lap dance because she hadn't gotten off all day. Then a bit later was back there wanting to kill another chick because " she was grinding" Im still trying to figure out how she was planning on getting off etc etc.


Met another that thought if you were pregnant and kept taking the pill that it would cancel out the pregnancy. IT took a lot of convincing to get her to go see a doctor and quit taking the pills.

Another was "unaware" that we are unable to show our lips ( vag lips ) if the hole is covered.

IE the thongs are thin and basically camel toe it but only the lips hang out.


My fave yet. A girl came into work asking where she could get meth. Now, obviously this isnt' strange ..yet. So we are all kinda stunned because here one of our managers is there, the housemom and like 12 girls. and we all just said " what ?! " and she said " you know meth. I hear it helps you lose weight and my aunt wants to lose weight and we were wondering if you could get it at GNC or something"

swear to god.

AkashaM
03-05-2006, 05:03 PM
The dumbest dancers i've met ...

One at the bluemoon up in Ny ( total nasty dive. ) a girl was in the dressing room talking about how she couldnt wait to get a lap dance because she hadn't gotten off all day. Then a bit later was back there wanting to kill another chick because " she was grinding" Im still trying to figure out how she was planning on getting off etc etc.

maybe she meant get high, ive heard gettting off refering to using heroin..

daphnecat
03-06-2006, 12:02 PM
A girl at the club said to the d.j she couldn't dance to r&b because it was not of her "color" another time she asked my friend " How come you don't show pictures of your kid to customers , are you embarassed the father's black?" I still don't know how she hasn't got her but kicked yet. She later asked this same girl why she wasn't speaking to her. The stupidist thing is onstage she lipsings but doesn't know the words and is still dancing when the music is over. On a bad night she'll say "Oh I hope I make enough to pay the maid." Did I mention she is also very unattractive...but is one of the biggest money makers there, it is so frustrating!!!!