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Pretty_Penny
01-20-2008, 03:20 PM
i've only been attracted to a handfull of them over the years, and i've been with the same guy since before i started dancing...

so no.

if i were single, i would say i wouldn't rule it out, but umm.... maybe once or twice a year does someone i find attractive walk into the club.

maryjade
01-20-2008, 03:43 PM
I did a couple once who came in, spent a lot of money, and seemed really into me. Turns out they were. I went home with them and it was amazing - more like they did me than I did them. So much fun being the focus of all that luvin'. ;)

PhillyDancer1982
01-21-2008, 09:36 AM
but umm.... maybe once or twice a year does someone i find attractive walk into the club.

That sucks...I'm guessing your club has a clientele consisting of mostly old guys? At my club, I see quite a few decently young good looking guys. LOL as the waitress/shotgirl, I've probably gotten with more customers than most of the dancers combined. :D I even got with a few of the managers' friends/relatives!

For example, this past weekend. The owner's friend(or is he his nephew? not sure) came in with his two buddies. I had gotten with this guy before. They were being cheap pricks to a lot of the dancers, but for some reason they were buying a lot of shots from me and tipping me well. It was great! :) So the owner's friend wants to take me out next weekend...I might go for it if the other customer/friend/fuck-buddy(I wrote about him already...the one from Ireland with the huge cock) I have doesn't call me in the next few days. And I don't think the managers mind too much...they hear me make jokes and bragging about the guys I've gotten with. The one manager gets a little annoyed sometimes when I tease him about me getting with his brother, but other than that it's cool.

Pretty_Penny
01-21-2008, 09:43 AM
That sucks...I'm guessing your club has a clientele consisting of mostly old guys? At my club, I see quite a few decently young good looking guys. LOL as the waitress/shotgirl, I've probably gotten with more customers than most of the dancers combined. :D I even got with a few of the managers' friends/relatives!


it's for a couple reasons...

there ARE a lot of old guys, but the young guys that tend to frequent clubs around here usually aren't my type. some of them would likely be considered attractive by most girls, but the buff "all american" type guy just isn't my thing. not to mention, i am incredibly turned off by machoness. i'm more of a tats/piercings/pretty boy kinda girl.. or i like really cute dorks/geeks/gamers. it's a rare occasion that those guys go to strip clubs (at least around here).

RoseWhite
01-21-2008, 09:52 AM
^^ Part of the Chicks Who Dig Scrawny Pale Guys club! :D

I'm with Penny. Even the young guys who come in and are objectively "attractive" - and I'm sure they are to many girls - they usually aren't my type. I feel like such a phony when I'm dancing for some strapping bodybuilder cliche and cooing over his big ol' guns, when the truth is I'm laughing to myself as he's lapping it up. I find that totally sterile and dull.

Lunarobverse
01-21-2008, 11:24 AM
i'm more of a tats/piercings/pretty boy kinda girl.. or i like really cute dorks/geeks/gamers. it's a rare occasion that those guys go to strip clubs (at least around here).

Assuming that you want to be attracted to customers, you should move to a geeky city, like Portland or Austin.

There's a lot more inked, pierced geeky boys in Portland. Well, boys and girls, both, actually.

Of course, that's not necessarily a given (you wanting to be attracted to your customers). Maybe you like it that way... :)

PhillyDancer1982
01-21-2008, 03:59 PM
it's for a couple reasons...

there ARE a lot of old guys, but the young guys that tend to frequent clubs around here usually aren't my type. some of them would likely be considered attractive by most girls, but the buff "all american" type guy just isn't my thing. not to mention, i am incredibly turned off by machoness. i'm more of a tats/piercings/pretty boy kinda girl.. or i like really cute dorks/geeks/gamers. it's a rare occasion that those guys go to strip clubs (at least around here).

Yeah I can relate to that. I like guys with piercings and tattoos too. I also like metrosexual guys. I'm not big on the all-American look either, as I tend to go for a lot of guys from other countries, particularly in Europe(I swear, European guys are generally better looking than Americans LOL). Luckily though, I've been able to scope out the guys who come in with mohawks and tattoos(not only do they sometimes frequent my club, but they're sluts that run their own porn site too! hahaha), or the guys from Europe(LOL such as the Irish guy with the huge cock I was telling you guys all about). Occasionally I'll go for a guy that is "all-American" or not my usual type, but he has to be absolutely gorgeous to make up for it. :)

I would like to find more guys that have tattoos and piercings and the whole alt rock look. I was hooking up with this one guy who was that way and completely gorgeous back in the recent past, but when I found out he had a girlfriend and was two-timing his girlfriend, I told him off with a cold text message: (in response to him asking if I'm free that night) "I'm busy tonight, and every single night after that, forever." Hahahahahahaha. Dumb slut deserved it though. :D

PhillyDancer1982
01-21-2008, 04:01 PM
^^ Part of the Chicks Who Dig Scrawny Pale Guys club! :D

I'm with Penny. Even the young guys who come in and are objectively "attractive" - and I'm sure they are to many girls - they usually aren't my type. I feel like such a phony when I'm dancing for some strapping bodybuilder cliche and cooing over his big ol' guns, when the truth is I'm laughing to myself as he's lapping it up. I find that totally sterile and dull.

Yeah I'm not big on the whole "bodybuilder" look either. I like when guys are fit and muscular, but not TOO big. I like my guys to be the perfect combination of thin AND toned/muscular. :)

Pretty_Penny
01-21-2008, 04:51 PM
Assuming that you want to be attracted to customers, you should move to a geeky city, like Portland or Austin.

There's a lot more inked, pierced geeky boys in Portland. Well, boys and girls, both, actually.

Of course, that's not necessarily a given (you wanting to be attracted to your customers). Maybe you like it that way... :)

oh we have a shitload of them in tampa. there's a pretty huge "scene" here. i just think, because of the general atmosphere of the clubs in this area, they tend to avoid them. heh :)

Xiomara
01-21-2008, 05:00 PM
Yeah,with only one particular custie,nobody else.Felt so icky up under him but got a lot of money from him each time.Went on for a while,til he started talking all that love mess. Fucker.

papillonluvr
01-21-2008, 05:03 PM
nope, and as long as im married i wont.

Tallulah
01-21-2008, 05:17 PM
Never ever ever ever ever ever ever...but then again, it's probably because I've never met a guy that i would be interested in dating in a club. It's a horrible double-standard that I have, but I do pre-judge the guys that come in.

I am so the same! A big hypocrite!!!

Lola Rose
01-21-2008, 06:31 PM
ummmm, all ya'll girls say you don't do ur custys.... how do you make ur moneys? Are ya'll just broke?

I always do it, especially if I got my period!!! hey, dick pays, and tampons are expensive!

Pretty_Penny
01-22-2008, 12:13 AM
ummmm, all ya'll girls say you don't do ur custys.... how do you make ur moneys? Are ya'll just broke?

I always do it, especially if I got my period!!! hey, dick pays, and tampons are expensive!

LOLOLOL

Xiomara
01-22-2008, 01:07 AM
Shyt...P'cola don't pay enough and I had bills. So many girls at my club said NEVER! knowing damn well they were doin it too.I did what I had to do.
NOW...if we're talking sleeping with a custie just cuz he's cute and horny. Hell no.They all look the same to me.

Lola....LOL

neve
01-22-2008, 05:20 AM
no
i've been with my boyfriend the entire time i've danced and i also dont really see customers as human beings or even men

Alaska
01-22-2008, 05:32 AM
Assuming that you want to be attracted to customers

heh heh....now what is wrong w/that assumption? you tell me.:D

omg i just realized that i ALWAYS picture penny in oregon. guess i got me some stereotypes of OR, eh? good ones tho....;D




I've done two....but the funny thing was, they weren't *really* customers....they were there all the freakin time tho so i felt cool with them. one always had some realllllly good drugs when i decided that was my thing for the night (not many times) and the other was always fun to get drunk and bs with (when i was too drunk of course) i only ever did dances for him on a couple of occasions. He was a genuinely super nice guy.


i've only been attracted to a handfull of them over the years, and i've been with the same guy since before i started dancing...



and yes.

Jenny
01-22-2008, 05:39 AM
I've done two....but the funny thing was, they weren't *really* customers....they were there all the freakin time tho so i felt cool with them.That's funny. The resident camper status would completely turn me off; like I can't imagine ever sleeping with a customer who had not bought a dance from me. I know it sounds weird; it's not about the exchange of money - it's more like rejecting me doesn't get me hot. As well an attitude of "well, no; I don't want to pay you $20; but I will allow you to fuck me for free"... doesn't get me hot either. Like, if I'm going to fuck a customer, he'd better be a good customer. Not necessarily sensible, because then you lose a good customer.

Alaska
01-22-2008, 05:53 AM
hehe. I would've thought I'd feel the same if I'd never done it. The first time I was just really fucked up, wouldn't have done it otherwise (oh well, I still always know if I'm safe or not, I trust me!) and the second was just cool, we were buddies for months bc in the beginning I used to be real nervous and talk to him a lot when it was slow.

Wow, my first official skankarella admission on here (I think) kinda weird.

I gotta say, in just a few months I noticed BIGGGG changes in me as a stripper, and I don't think I'd ever be in a situation again where I was nervous or hung out with a non-spender for any legnth of time. This was also back when I worked parties in a loft, wasn't yr typical sc atmosphere looks-wise, I know that had everything to do with it too.

Mily
01-22-2008, 06:04 AM
No, I've never fucked a custy... but I seriously wanted to once. The guy looked like the spitting image of a young Richard Gere. He was sssooo fucking HAWT!!! Too bad he was married. ::) I just won't go there... I don't care how good-looking the guy is. He asked me out for breakfast and everything, so I definitely could've fucked him. *sigh* Oh well, we did what we could in the club. }:D

Alaska
01-22-2008, 06:22 AM
no
and i also dont really see customers as human beings or even men

yeeesh, am i like, a 'softie' because i do?:-\

Lunarobverse
01-22-2008, 08:48 AM
heh heh....now what is wrong w/that assumption? you tell me.:D

Nothing wrong with that assumption - as long as I acknowledge up front that it is just that, an assumption. ;D

One thing I've learned is that some dancers want to sleep with their customers, and some dancers don't. Heh. Yes, I'm poking fun at the "What I've learned about dancers" thread.



omg i just realized that i ALWAYS picture penny in oregon. guess i got me some stereotypes of OR, eh? good ones tho....;D

Penny would fit right in at many of my favorite clubs up here. Which might be why she dances where she does - so she can stand out? I'm totally guessing here.

pixiekittie
01-22-2008, 11:38 AM
Nope, never.

MsLayne
01-22-2008, 12:38 PM
Im dating a custie now....he is such a sweetheart. I feel if I wasnt dancing I would have never met such a great guy. We have so much in common and hope that what we have becomes better over time...but only time will tell.

Callyish
01-22-2008, 06:27 PM
I fuck customers all the time.... speshly the big fat hairy ones who have BO and tiny cocks... god they turn me on so much!

FBR
01-22-2008, 06:37 PM
^^ Drat. I knew not being so hairy, taking a shower and having a medium size dick would make me draw the short loser straw ;)

Cally, you are a hoot :P

FBR

Delilah27
01-22-2008, 07:48 PM
Twice...and a mistake I won't do again...

They go to strip clubs for a reason...

Lola Rose
01-22-2008, 08:56 PM
this thread makes me wanna be a troll.

cally, wanna be my bj partner?

Callyish
01-22-2008, 08:59 PM
Only if its uncovered BJ giving Lola :D

PhillyDancer1982
01-23-2008, 09:44 AM
As someone that's hooked up with a LOT of customers, I'd to reclarify one point: I didn't bang any of these customers for money. I banged them just for fun. They were young good-looking guys that I surely would have banged if I'd met them outside of work. Just to set the record straight. ;D I don't bang anyone unless they meet my looks standards and have a decent amount of intelligence.


That's funny. The resident camper status would completely turn me off; like I can't imagine ever sleeping with a customer who had not bought a dance from me. I know it sounds weird; it's not about the exchange of money - it's more like rejecting me doesn't get me hot. As well an attitude of "well, no; I don't want to pay you $20; but I will allow you to fuck me for free"... doesn't get me hot either. Like, if I'm going to fuck a customer, he'd better be a good customer. Not necessarily sensible, because then you lose a good customer.

Yeah I agree with this. If I'm not "good enough" to have money spent on me for a lapdance/shot/etc, then why would they think I'm "good enough" to fuck for free? I'm not a golddigger, but I definitely like guys to spend money on me...it shows that they're interested in me, and that they consider me "worth it." It's not about the money or the presents, it's about the principle that these guys are going the extra mile to impress me, which shows that they think I'm worth something. It also shows that the guy is not cheap, and that that the guy makes a decent enough income(LOL I don't want to be with a McDonalds worker if you know what I mean!).

As far as the customers that I've banged...every single one of them spent a decent amount of money on me at the club. They either got a few lapdances, or a few shots plus a good tip. They didn't pay me a mint, but they spent a decent amount. I love it when guys who hate the test tube shots will buy a bunch of shots, just to "patronize" me(usually they'll buy the shot but let me drink it lol).

I also have this "guy-must-buy-me-things" mentality OTC. For example, I expect that the guy will pay my way on a date. I also expect that the guy will pick me up, and that I'll only pick him up if it's right along my way to a destination, or if we've been dating for a while and know each other well. I didn't always have this mentality, but I changed when I realized that guys were treating me like a doormat for NOT having the "guy-must-buy-me-things" mentality. Back when I picked guys up for dates all the time, they tended to use me for rides or else they made flippant comments about having "no need to buy a car since I have a car". >:( (soooo maddening) Or they would have me drive all the time, and then as soon as they get a car, they would expect me to MEET them somewhere on dates, not even letting me sit inside their car. (horrible, isn't it??) Ironically, I also noticed that on times that I was a "cheap date," the guys rarely ever called me again. I think this whole phenomenon is best described in the book "Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl." Last year, I had an epiphany/snapping and I became more of a "bitch" and so I expect guys to "pay their way."

PhillyDancer1982
01-23-2008, 09:48 AM
...And it wasn't just strip club jobs where I hooked up with customers or employees either. There were plenty of other jobs where I hooked up with, or tried to hook up with, coworkers or customers. I got fired from two jobs for sexual harassment...one a telemarketing job, one a grocery store job. Admittedly I have a sexual addiction so it is hard for me to put up restraint when I see a good-looking guy with a good job walking into the strip club(or anywhere for that matter). If I had a boyfriend, it would be different, because I would be able to "get some" all the time so then I wouldn't need to go after other guys. Also if I had a boyfriend, I would have some degree of loyalty, which would inhibit me from seeking out other guys too. But I don't, so I need to "get some" somehow...

Jenny
01-23-2008, 10:02 AM
I have no issue with "doing custies"; but I would consider that if you have a sexual addiction and are in fact harassing people you work with becasue of that, that you have a problem that is not being addressed by "getting some." It's not okay to sexually harass people just because you are a woman, and if you don't have "restraint" - again your own well being, both physical and psychological, is at risk. What you are describing is not a healthy sex drive; it is compulsive behaviour.

teeth_of_the_hydra
01-23-2008, 10:15 AM
I have no issue with "doing custies"; but I would consider that if you have a sexual addiction and are in fact harassing people you work with becasue of that, that you have a problem that is not being addressed by "getting some." It's not okay to sexually harass people just because you are a woman, and if you don't have "restraint" - again your own well being, both physical and psychological, is at risk. What you are describing is not a healthy sex drive; it is compulsive behaviour.

Well stated.

ellebelle
01-23-2008, 11:56 AM
The guy I'm seeing now, I met at work. He's the first customer I've ever slept with in the six years I've been working in clubs though. I don't even know why I gave him my number, but I'm glad I did =]

I've become friends with many people from the clubs, but I have a really hard time looking at anyone sexually after they have been in the club more than once.

PhillyDancer1982
01-23-2008, 01:46 PM
I have no issue with "doing custies"; but I would consider that if you have a sexual addiction and are in fact harassing people you work with becasue of that, that you have a problem that is not being addressed by "getting some." It's not okay to sexually harass people just because you are a woman, and if you don't have "restraint" - again your own well being, both physical and psychological, is at risk. What you are describing is not a healthy sex drive; it is compulsive behaviour.

Okay let me address this issue. I don't "harass" people at my current work. The two times that I got fired for "harassment" were 4 and 8 years ago. Admittedly "harassment" wasn't the only reason for my firing 7 years ago...it was also because (despite trying hard and being really nice to customers) I'm a terrible salesperson...and the person that I made comments about didn't care, he was actually flattered and hit on me after that, it was the manager(aka his relative) who cared. They were probably looking for any excuse to fire me because I had shitty sales.

At the other job, yeah the guy felt "harassed" by me. This guy thought he was hot shit, and he would constantly sexually harass the other female coworkers in small ways. A few girls told me about this. I didn't like the kid(mostly because he didn't like me, but anyhoo), so on my very last day of work(I was quitting), I started elbowing him the same exact way he did to other girls. Funny how quickly he screamed "Manager, manager!" Fuckin hypocrite. Again, I am convinced that this "harassment" was an excuse as to the bigger reason that they fired me, considering that management was already very pissy with me quitting, since I was the only sucker that they'd been able to con into working their shitty 5am opening shifts for them.

Those two jobs aside, there were a few times in the past that I did indeed harass guys. Most times the guys I "targetted" were asshole jerks that I felt "deserved" it in some way or another, as sick as that sounds(e.g., a guy that raped a female in my dorm). This occured during times that I wasn't able to get guys voluntarily. Luckily I don't have that problem as much today, now that I make a decent income and I look a bit better. But yeah it is a psychological problem and I'm aware of it. I'd like to think that I have it under wraps now, but if I got into a car accident and experience implant bursting and face disfiguration...watch out, I might feel obliged to go back to my ol' tricks lol j/k.

PhillyDancer1982
01-24-2008, 01:23 PM
Well stated.

Yeah but unfortunately, not everybody had the great opportunity to lose their virginity at age 13 like you did. Some people(i.e., me) went through years of sexual frustration, unable to get dates, and harassed by guys for being "ugly" and "flat" on a regular basis to the point that my mom wondered why I didn't go to the principal about it(why?...because I knew that would just lead to putting more attention on a situation that was already excruciatingly embarrassing for me). Some people build up frustration and hurt feelings over the years to the point that they end up vastly overcompensating. It's so easy to say I have "issues."

callah44
01-25-2008, 09:01 AM
No, I havent slept with any custies, but Im new, so if I had, that would be really wrong...I dont ever plan on crossing to the dark side, although I wanted to last night...there was a guy that came in, gorgeous (he had the young paul newman look going on), and he played hard to get with me all night by pulling me in and telling me how much he wanted me and then resisting me for a dance. Normally, being "pulled in' and touched/talked to like that by anyone would make my stomach churn, and some moron playing hard to get wouldnt get any more of my time, but he had a low voice that was so sexy and just seemed like he wanted it so bad but was married and resisted the urge. I guess if the guy is hot enough (and someone you would be attracted to in another environment), its possible to be really turned on by them. As for sleeping with, no comment....I dont have enough time under my belt to pass judgement on anyone who has.

Alaska
01-25-2008, 10:34 AM
Yeah but unfortunately, not everybody had the great opportunity to lose their virginity at age 13 like you did. Some people(i.e., me) went through years of sexual frustration, unable to get dates, and harassed by guys for being "ugly" and "flat" on a regular basis to the point that my mom wondered why I didn't go to the principal about it(why?...because I knew that would just lead to putting more attention on a situation that was already excruciatingly embarrassing for me). Some people build up frustration and hurt feelings over the years to the point that they end up vastly overcompensating. It's so easy to say I have "issues."

I just wanted to point out, that this sounds like the male version of why he'd sexually harass someone. Late bloomer, sexually frustrated, rejected by hot girls, teased, so it's easy to see why I've blamed women and demand mine whether or not it makes them uncomfortable.

Jenny
01-25-2008, 10:37 AM
^^^
Yeah, I had a reply that went something like that, but I really think that I made my point pretty effectively in my first post.

fancygirl
01-25-2008, 11:46 AM
negative. thought about it a couple times in the realm of make-believe.

however, I'd be willing to under the right circumstances.

for example, I just know God's going to send me Gerard Butler some sweet, sweet shift. And then nobody's going to see me OR him for a week.

teeth_of_the_hydra
01-25-2008, 12:26 PM
Yeah but unfortunately, not everybody had the great opportunity to lose their virginity at age 13 like you did. Some people(i.e., me) went through years of sexual frustration, unable to get dates, and harassed by guys for being "ugly" and "flat" on a regular basis to the point that my mom wondered why I didn't go to the principal about it(why?...because I knew that would just lead to putting more attention on a situation that was already excruciatingly embarrassing for me). Some people build up frustration and hurt feelings over the years to the point that they end up vastly overcompensating. It's so easy to say I have "issues."

You sure are preoccupied with hanging on to negativity. Have you ever thought about dropping your grudge against the universe and not trying to be some spooky, obsessed avenger for all the wrongs ever done to you by people who were just idiotic and immature trying to show off, like how people do when they're children? Because the thing is... harassing boy X doesn't change the things that boy Y said to you in the past. It seems to just continue the cycle of grudge-holding, approval-seeking, acting out and justification that monopolizes the majority of your thoughts.

Incidentally, getting my cherry popped at age 13 made my life harder, not easier. It was only when I slept with real jerks in my later teen years that I felt thankful to have first had sex in the context of a puppy-love relationship, rather than passed out at a party. I live and learn and try to count my blessings whenever I can; a bit Pollyannaish, I suppose, but it makes for a peaceful inner monologue. Maybe you should try it sometime.

AlexxaHex
01-25-2008, 12:41 PM
^^ Part of the Chicks Who Dig Scrawny Pale Guys club! :D

I'm with Penny. Even the young guys who come in and are objectively "attractive" - and I'm sure they are to many girls - they usually aren't my type. I feel like such a phony when I'm dancing for some strapping bodybuilder cliche and cooing over his big ol' guns, when the truth is I'm laughing to myself as he's lapping it up. I find that totally sterile and dull.

You are my sister, I think. ;D

On the original topic...I've never taken a customer home for fun or anything. The whole concept is terrifying to me. I had a regular that clicked with me and some things happened, but I would never just hook up with customers. Some of them have been really sexy though. And it was tempting. But I think just as they can see us as being a fantasy girl at work, it's easy for us to have delusions about who they really are. Let's face it, they are at a strip club. It's not USUALLY the best place to find a quality partner.

PhillyDancer1982
01-25-2008, 12:57 PM
You sure are preoccupied with hanging on to negativity. Have you ever thought about dropping your grudge against the universe and not trying to be some spooky, obsessed avenger for all the wrongs ever done to you by people who were just idiotic and immature trying to show off, like how people do when they're children? Because the thing is... harassing boy X doesn't change the things that boy Y said to you in the past. It seems to just continue the cycle of grudge-holding, approval-seeking, acting out and justification that monopolizes the majority of your thoughts.

Who says that I'm "harassing" these people? You and Jenny say that I'm harassing them...okay and perhaps I said it too before...perhaps it's my choice of words that leads people to believe and say the things they do. :-[

Admittedly I was a little overbearing in my behavior when I was younger(i.e., 15-21), in response to guys that were overly rude to me in their rejections. Most of my "harassing" behaviors were done to the guys who directly dissed me...e.g., harassing boy X for what boy X did. E.g,. the time these guys turned me down and then proceeded to taunt me for being flat, which led to me starting a fist fight with them. Then again, it didn't take a retaliatory fist fight or anything close to it, to constitute "harassment"...some guys acted as if my trying to converse with them was annoying enough, a borderline "harassment" of sorts even though I didn't mean harm by it.

I'd like to think that I'm not nearly as repulsive or "flat" as I was before, therefore I have no need to "harass" guys to get some, thankyou. I'd like to think that me flirting with guys wouldn't be considered "harassment" anymore, but would be considered "welcome."



Incidentally, getting my cherry popped at age 13 made my life harder, not easier. It was only when I slept with real jerks in my later teen years that I felt thankful to have first had sex in the context of a puppy-love relationship, rather than passed out at a party. I live and learn and try to count my blessings whenever I can; a bit Pollyannaish, I suppose, but it makes for a peaceful inner monologue. Maybe you should try it sometime.

I can relate to the counting blessings part, because -- believe it or not, despite my rather "dark" posts at times -- I do the same thing from time to time. If anything, I'm probably a lot "darker" and more pessimistic on this website than in real life, simply because it's easier to write about things that bother me in writing.

Perhaps I am a "sexual deviant"(as my ex frequently scolded me for being), but...I felt that my life actually got easier when I started going after much-older guys and dating and having sex with guys who (as it turned out) were already teen dads. Most people here would disagree. But maybe that's just me. I don't know. Maybe I don't have as much of an emotional need with sex as most people do, not sure.

PhillyDancer1982
01-25-2008, 01:08 PM
I just wanted to point out, that this sounds like the male version of why he'd sexually harass someone. Late bloomer, sexually frustrated, rejected by hot girls, teased, so it's easy to see why I've blamed women and demand mine whether or not it makes them uncomfortable.

Well yeah, when the "demanding" is done to the specific guys that ridiculed me to the point of harassment, then what's wrong with that?

Example: Girl is at an outdoors event(where there's alcohol) and she goes to talk and flirt with a group of guys. They are rude, mutter something under their breath about "get that ugly girl away from us" and act like jerks. Girl too has been drinking, so she stands up to them and says "Well I refuse to let you be such an asshole about it!" and the guys start taunting her for being flat. Girl retaliates by punching the one guy in the face. Guy's friend retaliates by hitting girl back in the face.*

* true story, by the way

What is so wrong about that? The guys deserved it. This isn't a matter of girl retaliating on an innocent guy, it's a matter of her retaliating on the very guys that made her feel like shit. I've heard of strippers kicking guys with their stiletto heel for a lot less than that.

Jenny
01-25-2008, 02:04 PM
Philly - not for nothing, but you said that you were fired not once but twice for sexual harassment. Why do you think we got the idea that you were sexually harassing people?

By the way - it is completely unacceptable on every level to punch someone for making fun of you.

PhillyDancer1982
01-25-2008, 04:49 PM
LOL oh come on -- how many girls have written on SW about slugging or spilling a drink on a customer for the customer talking degrading or trying to grope them?

And yeah admittedly I kinda brought it onto myself, blatantly announcing that I'd been fired from two jobs for sexual harassment...admittedly it's more embarrassing for me to say "Despite trying really hard, I just didn't make enough sales" or "They were angry that I was quitting, so they said 'you can't quit, you're fired'!", than to simply say that I was fired because of (borderline) harassment. :-[

Jenny
01-25-2008, 05:06 PM
Philly, I'm not sure what you want right now. I mean, we weren't discussing jobs we got fired from. You announced, only in the context of a tendency to hook up with colleagues and customers, that you were fired (twice) for sexual harassment. Then, after someone mentioned maybe that is not a neutral or "grrl power" thing to do, you backpedaled and said that the firings were unjustfied - there were only ostensibly for sexual harassment (twice - when that is such an intuitive falsehood to make up regarding female employees) and you only sexually harass friends. Then you backpedal further and say that you don't really sexually harass them - you just make unwelcome advances, start public arguments when you are rejected and then punch them (thus effectively moving into assault). Oh, and in the middle you say that the only reason every other woman isn't acting this way is because she lost her virginity at a young age and that the behaviour is somehow neutralized because you were horny and nobody wanted you. Honestly - look at what you are presenting us with for a second and think about what kind of reaction you could viably expect?

PhillyDancer1982
01-27-2008, 09:27 AM
Okay perhaps I deserve getting criticism if I'm going to "brag" that I was fired for sexual harassment...point given. And perhaps I shouldn't exaggerate things for the worst and then wonder why people are criticising me. In all reality, my "sexual harassment firings" weren't completely due to "sexual harassment"...I was actually fired for different reasons(low sales at the one job, and managers already having a grudge against me for quitting when they needed me to work 5am shifts for them)...so at that point, they used any slight wrongdoing as a reason to justify "firing" me. In my opinion, it sounds more interesting to say that I was fired for "harassment", but perhaps I should accept that if I'm going to present myself that way, I should accept the criticism that comes with it.

There were other times that I did that to myself. E.g., the time I failed the driving test for basically being too meek and easily intimidated by the gruff, overweight male tester. I didn't want to tell my classmates the "real" reason why I failed, because I didn't want people thinking of me as a meek, easily intimidated, unassertive dork...so I made up a bullshit reason about failing because of having too much bad attitude with the tester. Naturally my classmates criticized me for making the "bad decision" to have attitude with the tester. I didn't like the criticism I got, yet I'd chosen to "present myself" to my classmates in a way that left me open to criticism.

PhillyDancer1982
01-27-2008, 09:28 AM
By the way - it is completely unacceptable on every level to punch someone for making fun of you.

I do have to disagree with this.