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View Full Version : Argh! Inaccurate Club Information Sucks!



aggieed
01-16-2006, 11:18 PM
This is about 90% rant, 10% non-TR...non- because it's a report about basically nothing based on inaccurate club information.

So these last couple of days I've found myself in deep South Texas once again. I was down here about a year ago when I visited Stiletto's in Pharr and the Tex-Mex Lounge in Edinburg. I had a great time at the Tex-Mex. However, this time around, I found myself a little deeper south near Harlingen and Brownsivlle. I'm actually about 60 miles away from Harlingen and about 30 miles away from Brownsville. Since I had some time to kill on Monday afternoon, I figured I would do some research to see where I can see some T&A while down here.

Unfortunately, there isn't much available. There is a Stiletto's in Brownsville, but unlike their sister club in Pharr, they don't open until 7 PM on weekdays so that was out. There's some clubs in Harlingen, but most of them don't open until 7 PM as well. BUT, according to the StripClubList and MensClubGuide (and a couple of other places), Club Fantasy in Harlingen opens at noon on weekdays. Woo hoo! I'm on my way to see some T&A!

So I make that long trek into Harlingen, all dressed up, looking nice and clean. Getting closer to Harlingen I see a billboard for Club Fantasy that says, "Where Fantasy Becomes Reality." LOL! What a can of worms that could open up if they only knew. They also claim to have Sports, Food, and Hot Women. The food part indicated to me that they probably had a lively lunch crowd...right?

But guess what? I'm on the highway driving past the club before exiting to turn around and come back to it, and I see that the parking lot is nearly empty. This is about 1 PM. I drive around to the club and into the parking lot. There are two cars there (manager and bartender perhaps, or maybe manager and lone dancer) and nothing else. There is no sign indicating the REAL hours they are open...just one sign saying that the area is under video surveilance 24 hours a day. No lunch crowd, no indication that they were open at all...

...by the way, the place was a large warehouse type building that was painted a very ugly purple color...even more screwed up was the storage type shed next to it that was painted the same color...

...so I drove off...disappointed at not being able to see some Hottie T&A and angry at the seemingly bad information on the websites I researched. Sheesh!

Actually, since I didn't go up to the door to see if they were actually open or closed I don't really know what the club status was, but I would think that, allegedly being he ONLY strip club around that would be open in the afternoon, they would have been hopping even with the holiday.

But, oh, well...money not spent is money saved for another day...but damn, I was really hoping to have some fun in the afternoon.

I guess I could have gone to Stiletto's in Brownsville tonight, but I decided against it for various reasons...mainly because tomorrow is going to be a long day. Early wake-up call, flight back to Austin in the afternoon, and some good ol' Big 12 basketball between Texas and Texas Tech as a night cap before finally heading home. Go Bobby Knight! Well, one can hope.;)

Maybe I'll stop by the Hooters in Brownsville for lunch tomorrow. At least that's some partial T&A although I would much rather have them be half naked rubbing themselves all over me...among other things.

FourWinns
01-17-2006, 06:25 PM
... and I see that the parking lot is nearly empty. This is about 1 PM. I drive around to the club and into the parking lot. There are two cars there...

All I can say is I generally go early weekday afternoons. I used to move on if the parking lot was sparse but now I like to go on in and check it out. I recommend you try any club you come across if you have the time. I've had good times in mostly empty clubs all the way to being scared and asked to leave in a downtown Denver dive by some local customers.

Katrine
01-17-2006, 09:52 PM
What do you expect from that area?

aggieed
01-17-2006, 10:23 PM
Yeah, I know, but it would have been nice had there been ONE club in that little area that was open during the daytime...

...by the way, I think I'm going to skip out on UT home basketball games from here on out...Tech received a thorough beat down tonight. Anybody want my Texas-Kansas ticket?

Just kidding...I've already given it away...I'm going to be in Houston that weekend...thank goodness!!!!

doc-catfish
01-18-2006, 09:16 AM
Anybody want my Texas-Kansas ticket?

Just kidding...I've already given it away...
Darn it. I so wanted an excuse to go down to Austin. I have a couple of co-workers who'd probably pay good money if they could make the trip.
;)

But back on topic...

Yeah, strip club review sites are nice...when they work. The problem is that TUSCL often has two few reviews on some clubs, and SCL's comments boards are so full of drama, that you can acutally ask a legit question about the place and be ignored.

I say when all else fails, all you need is the club's phone number. If you call them during the daytime and no one is there, its a good sign that they're closed.

If I'm heading to a BYOB club, I've made it a habit to call, because a lot of them restrict in some sense what you can bring in, even when its non-alcoholic (because they sell juice and soda at the bar).

Docido
01-18-2006, 02:57 PM
The SCL listings are a joke! My local board has clubs that have closed, clubs that have burnt down (I guess someone needed the insurance money) and multiple headings for the same club. Sometimes they can't even get the addresses correct. The discussion boards are great if you want to read about dancers calling each other skanky. slutty, or drug addicts. Great entertainment, but useless when it comes to finding accurate information. TUSCL is a little better since they do seem to update the information more often.

FourWinns
01-18-2006, 04:53 PM
The SCL listings are a joke!

I agree with you but the reviews are only as good as the people that contribute. I'm as guilty as the next person as I've been to a couple dozen strip clubs and haven't submitted a club review or trip report yet. For me reviews (SC, employees or products) take a lot of time and they're difficult to do right.

This site is definitely entertaining and I've also learned alot but yes the club reviews I've read suck.

doc-catfish
01-18-2006, 05:20 PM
I'm as guilty as the next person as I've been to a couple dozen strip clubs and haven't submitted a club review or trip report yet. For me reviews (SC, employees or products) take a lot of time and they're difficult to do right.
One thing that should be pointed out, a review and a TR are NOT the same thing. A good review should be informative to those reading it, not a barometer of how one paricular evening at that club went. I can't stand those idiots I see on TUSCL who review the same club over and over just so they can get free VIP credit.

A good review doesn't have to be lengthy and time consuming either:

1. State the day of week and time you went.
2. Verify the information given about the club on the site for accuracy, note any discrepancies.
3. State what you liked about the place, and what you didn't.

It can usually be done in a single paragraph.

Katrine
01-18-2006, 09:59 PM
...by the way, I think I'm going to skip out on UT home basketball games from here on out...Tech received a thorough beat down tonight. Anybody want my Texas-Kansas ticket?

Just kidding...I've already given it away...I'm going to be in Houston that weekend...thank goodness!!!!

Hmmmm, do actual UT alumni get any priority here??? I was supposed to go to last weekend's game but got dissed the last minute because a certain legendary retired NBA athlete who is doing business with my friend wanted to go. Said legend also loves the massage parlour, so it was a "boys outing". Ha, if they only knew!!!

lunchbox
01-19-2006, 12:39 PM
alumni get that stuff by making donations.