View Full Version : What to do?
easy_e
03-07-2006, 03:41 PM
Stopping by just to say hi (and not spending any money) is a good way to find out exactly how far charm and sparkling wit will take you with a dancer (be prepared, the trip will usually be short).
You think?
The calling you every day thing will fade once she realizes that you have grown a pair and you are not going to be her on-demand ATM.)
I wonder how long that will take (the realization, not growing a pair, gave up on that)
I generally walk in with $500 and almost never spend even half of that unless it's a club were I'm doing a VIP room with a special lady. I go 1 to 3 times a month. When I was in once or twice a week mode a few years ago I went in with maybe $300 and again, never spent more than about half of it. .
I never run a CC tab for drinks either. You'd be amazed how quickly two or three hot strippers drinking fru fru "dancer drinks" can run-up a $200 bar tab.
$200 bar tabs don't amaze me, I'm usually relieved to discover that's all it is. I just can't see how you can leave a SC with $250 left in your pocket. I guess my inability to do so is why I'm so popular, and here I was thinking it was my charm and sparkling wit. Maybe I should drink less so I don't forget they just want my money. :-\
yoda57us
03-07-2006, 04:10 PM
I wonder how long that will take (the realization, not growing a pair, gave up on that)
She'll stop calling every day when she finds another ATM to call every day. I hope the hell you aren't answering the damn phone!
$200 bar tabs don't amaze me, I'm usually relieved to discover that's all it is. I just can't see how you can leave a SC with $250 left in your pocket. I guess my inability to do so is why I'm so popular, and here I was thinking it was my charm and sparkling wit. Maybe I should drink less so I don't forget they just want my money. :-\
The $200 bar tab itself doesn't scare me; I just don't like the surprise when the bill comes. I'd rather peel it off $20 at a time.
If I go to see a dancer that I do VIP with I'm not going to leave with anything in my pocket. If I go to hang in a club where I just know a lot of dancers, how much I spend will depend on whose working and how busy it is. I don't shop around much and I tend to do about the same number of dances with a girl all the time. In my more reckless days I was like a perv in a titty-candy shop. I kept looking for dancers to spend money on until it was gone or I reached my ATM limit. I didn't get to be an educated consumer overnight. It took years of being a RIL with an empty wallet at 2am for me to wise up.;)
easy_e
03-08-2006, 06:39 AM
She'll stop calling every day when she finds another ATM to call every day. I hope the hell you aren't answering the damn phone!
Last time I tried that, (not answering) she called 21 times in 5 minutes and left 8 messages. I think I'm just going to tell her I moved to another city.
yoda57us
03-08-2006, 07:25 AM
Last time I tried that, (not answering) she called 21 times in 5 minutes and left 8 messages. I think I'm just going to tell her I moved to another city.
Proving once again that speed dial is not always a good thing....
Wow, that is a bit excessive, even for a dancer going through gravy train seperation anxiety. You've got yourself a winner there e.....:O
Telling her you moved means you can't go into that club again, try just telling her to leave you the fuck alone.
Richard_Head
03-08-2006, 02:19 PM
Why is this story getting more and more farfetched every day?
SportsWriter2
03-08-2006, 08:39 PM
Last time I tried that, (not answering) she called 21 times in 5 minutes and left 8 messages. I think I'm just going to tell her I moved to another city.
Shut off your phone and they'll use up your minutes fast, randomly leaving @#$%^&@*&^(%$ messages. Turning off your phone is the fastest way to find out if you have a psycho on your hands. They stop when they throw the phone at something and the display breaks. Change your digits and move to another subculture. :O
Jenny
03-08-2006, 08:51 PM
Why is this story getting more and more farfetched every day? Well we did start with a sad little victim who really wanted him, but was too afraid. Now we have a psychotic stalker. I think we passed credible a while ago. But still. Nice use of stereotypes. Very engaging. It has allowed all of us to band together and feel superior to either him or her. Can we not just enjoy it on that level?
sander8son
03-09-2006, 01:31 AM
im just gonna go ahead and quote the most off topic part of this thread and respond to it.
. but hey, i'm sure he's doing it out of love and for her own good. sort of like this guy (http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0217062contract1.html).
punk, that was disgusting. i would never write up a contract like that. i mean, wtf!?!?!? he actually allows her to have a period? id make that bitch get on the shot.
yoda57us
03-11-2006, 11:10 AM
Nice use of stereotypes. Very engaging. It has allowed all of us to band together and feel superior to either him or her. Can we not just enjoy it on that level?
Exactly, embrace the story, who cares how much of it is true? There's more BS floating around this board than most of us could fathom anyway....Feeling superior, getting in touch with my arrogant, smart-ass side is why I come here.
easy_e
03-11-2006, 12:18 PM
I don't expect to be believed, but FWITW every word I have written is the pure and absolute truth. Including the conclusion. She called 10 minutes ago from her Dad's cell #. She has accepted the help of her parents and is leaving town with them today, minus the abusive thug. She is done with stripping. She said she is going to keep in touch, but I don't expect to ever hear from her or see her again.
I'm glad she is out of the situation she was in, but it hurts anyway. The truth is that no girl has ever made me feel the way she did, stripper or not. I don't care if the people on this board think it's all BS, it's real and I'm trying to get through the day as best I can. So while you all enjoy your feelings of superiority and want to think I made this up, I'm at work self medicating with valium and beer so I can get what I need done and go home, at which time I intend to get seriously fucked up, which is my way of dealing with emotional pain. We're both better off this way, but that doesn't make it any easier. So having said all that, I don't give a fucked monkey's asshole if you believe it or not. I'm still glad this board exists b/c there's not too many people I can share this crap with. Well, the meds are kicking in and I feel good enough to concentrate on my work, so that's it, for now.
yoda57us
03-11-2006, 12:53 PM
Welcome to the board e. I warned you that we eat our young but you kept coming back for more until we turned on you. Don't take it personaly. Every newbie that shows up here with a story like yours gets doubted by about the third page of the thread. If you want to hang out here you will learn a few things and have a few laughs. I warn you that, most of the time you may not like the responses you hear. There are hundreds of opinions floating around this board and most of them come from experience. We don't know each other so we don't really worry too much about hurting anybody's feelings. If you have a thin skin you should probably lose your bookmark for this site.....Or you could join in the fun.
You fell in love with a stripper, it happens and it always ends badly. Recovery gets easier the more times you do it.
Richard_Head
03-11-2006, 01:24 PM
Now everything is all wrapped up, that didn't take long. LOL, what a load of crap. Let me guess, by next week this whole situation will have turned you into a cracked out drug addict.
mr_punk
03-12-2006, 07:24 AM
Thanks for the welcome. I stand by my story and extend an invitation to anyone to PM me for directions and transport themselves down south where I live (at their expense.) I'll introduce them to all the parties involved, except the thug BF and even split the bar tab.that's not necessary. FWIW, i believe you. after all, my entertainment value is dependent upon something really bad happening to you over a stripper.
At times I wish I was more like Mr_Punk, but unfortunately I do look into the eyes of these beautiful women and the trouble starts when they look back.excellent, you should keep making those goo-goo eyes. no good deed should go unpunished.
Why is this story getting more and more farfetched every day?yes. still, one can only hope that something really bad happens to him in the sc.
Let me guess, by next week this whole situation will have turned you into a cracked out drug addict.interesting. stripper turns customer into crack addict. hmmm....i like it.
easy_e
03-12-2006, 09:09 AM
To the nonbelievers, the skeptics, the haters and those whose entertainment revolves aroung the misfortunes of others, I salute you, because at least you have found purpose and meaning in your lives. It's not my nature to pass judgment on others, and I really can't say if your way or mine is any better.
I thought this story was over, but it's not. I got home from work yesterday enveloped in a pleasantly numb fog from my self-medicating, fully intending to amplify both the numbness and the fog with a combination of pharmaceuticals, alcohol and the sacred ganja. To my surprise, the object of my "sicko infatuation"
called again from her dad's cell to let me know she had arrived safely, and wanted to stay in touch. We emailed back and forth a few times and then she called again and we talked for an hour or so. She sounded happy and strong and relieved to be out of the abusive situation she was in.
I want her to find a man who will treat her with the love, respect and tenderness she deserves, because she is a sweet girl with a heart of gold and will do the same in return. There's a tiny voice inside me that wants that man to be me, but I know I'm not the right guy for her, we are too different and it would never work.
I think it's better if we just stay friends. I'm happy for her and delighted that we can stay in touch.
mr_punk, you will be glad to know that my life is still in danger because I'm sure the thug thinks I had something to do with her disappearance. This makes my SC exile much easier, since it's kind of hard to relax and have fun when you have a mortal enemy gunning for you. So I've made it to day 12 now, which is a record I have not surpassed in the last 6 months. But don't worry, I could still end up dead or maimed depending on how determined and resourceful the thug turns out to be. So keep your dream alive, there's still hope that harm will befall me.
yoda, I have not been offended or angered by anything said here, its only words and I take it all with a grain of salt. I was expecting to be flamed unmercifully and instead, you and others welcomed me to this board. I was not in a good place yesterday, not only from the SS but some personal matters including the recent death of a close friend and some BS from my ex, so I apologize for my reaction, I'm normally not that thin skinned. I've learned a lot from this board and I'll be back with more when I return to SCing after my exile. :)
kikin
03-12-2006, 10:24 AM
SS = Stripper Shit
:)
Katrine
03-12-2006, 06:42 PM
His tale doesn't seem implausible to me. Psycho relationships can move very quickly. My ex went from normal to psycho to stalker to non-stop telephone abuse, then suddently dissapeared, all in a matter of just over one month.....
lunchbox
03-12-2006, 11:29 PM
My ex went from normal to psycho to stalker to non-stop telephone abuse, then suddently dissapeared, all in a matter of just over one month.....
It's not you, it's me...
yoda, I have not been offended or angered by anything said here, its only words and I take it all with a grain of salt. I was expecting to be flamed unmercifully and instead, you and others welcomed me to this board. I was not in a good place yesterday, not only from the SS but some personal matters including the recent death of a close friend and some BS from my ex, so I apologize for my reaction, I'm normally not that thin skinned. I've learned a lot from this board and I'll be back with more when I return to SCing after my exile. :)
Easy, to be honest the Junkies have been so kind I think they (we) are all on prozac. Back in the day, you would have been whipped within an inch of your life. Must be due to excessive moderation by Jay and me. We've all turned into sensitive PC wimps ;)
FBR
easy_e
03-14-2006, 11:12 AM
Easy, to be honest the Junkies have been so kind I think they (we) are all on prozac. Back in the day, you would have been whipped within an inch of your life. Must be due to excessive moderation by Jay and me. We've all turned into sensitive PC wimps ;)
FBR
I was expecting a severe (virtual) ass-whipping with the hope that it would bring me to my senses. I think everyone is on prozac or zoloft or something, maybe I should be too.
I think I am going to end my story now because things have progressed to a much different level than I expected, and I think certain things should be kept private. Everything I said was true and she is in a safe place now, so to me, this tale ends on a positive note, at least for now.
kikin
03-14-2006, 11:14 AM
Easy, to be honest the Junkies have been so kind I think they (we) are all on prozac. Back in the day, you would have been whipped within an inch of your life. Must be due to excessive moderation by Jay and me. We've all turned into sensitive PC wimps ;)
FBR
Junkies have been so kind? Are you kidding me? That's news to me. Tell that to Yoda after I made a benign jokey comment about a week and a half ago.
:)
yoda57us
03-14-2006, 02:23 PM
I'm flatered that you keep track of these things Kikin but stop crying in your Cherios about something that took place on a different thread and in a different context. If you want to take a shot at me have the nads to do it in the thread where it all started so other readers know what your talking about (if they are bored enough to care).
SportsWriter2
03-15-2006, 04:03 PM
This sidetrack has been brought to you by Cheerios and the letter E. ::)
yoda57us
03-16-2006, 06:20 AM
This sidetrack has been brought to you by Cheerios and the letter E. ::)
Sporty, you are the undisputed king of sidetrack so just stop it will ya!;)
....but thanks for the spelling update on breakfast cereal....
Surrender
04-26-2006, 05:54 PM
I am a dancer and i Know how you feel being in that situation and the thing that i am going to say is you are not the first and the last. You have to do whats right for you and go on your feelings. I dont agree with anyone using anyone or taking advantage. Do not get yourself involved with a married individual. Make sure that you know where your place is. Its also hard for an abusive person to get over there fears and thats why they have help for them kind of situations.
easy_e
04-27-2006, 06:50 AM
I am a dancer and i Know how you feel being in that situation and the thing that i am going to say is you are not the first and the last. You have to do whats right for you and go on your feelings. I dont agree with anyone using anyone or taking advantage. Do not get yourself involved with a married individual. Make sure that you know where your place is. Its also hard for an abusive person to get over there fears and thats why they have help for them kind of situations.
You are right. Fortunately I'm better now than when I started this thread. I still fall in love with dancers but it's easier to get over. The whole process only takes a few days of hopeless PL-ness followed by a swift return to my senses and the awareness of reality. It would be easier to view dancers as mindless sex objects for my gratification but that's not how I am, because they are human beings just like me. I'm careful not to let myself get taken advantage of and the minute I stop having fun I move on to a different club or a different dancer. BTW I'm still in contact with the girl that started this whole thing and I'm happy to report that she is no longer being abused and we are just friends now. 8)
xdamage
04-27-2006, 11:47 AM
You probably didn't get flamed too badly because you are aware you are being a PL. Most of the PLs are entirely oblvious to it. PLness happens, billions of years of evolutionary instincts turn on in the S.Cs. Even experienced club goers can get sucked into it and forget the reality of the situation, and so I don't flame SCJs for falling into PL mode so much as for being retards and not seeing it for what it is.
You know what you need to do (let her go and stop investing emotions into women you give $$s to for company/sex/etc.) Might be time to take a break from the clubs. She may well just be a flake, choosing abusive men, she might be a raging psycho that brings on the abuse because some sick part of her likes the drama. Who knows. Who cares. Time to take your inner Knight in Shiming armor elsewhere. There are too many good women out there to waste your time or emotions on psychos or on women you are paying for.
CarGuy
04-27-2006, 12:30 PM
OK...I am still trying to get all the acronyms...is there a FAQ sheet for this? Go ahead flame a newbie
easy_e
04-27-2006, 02:55 PM
There's a list of acronyms somewhere. Most you can figure out on your own. PL stands for "pathetic loser", meaning a guy who becomes infatuated with a stripper and spends a ridiculous amount of money and time on her in the sadly mistaken belief that she wants something besides his money. ("I think that stripper really likes me!")
Of course, dancers are masters at the art of turning a strong and confident man into a spineless, quivering emotional wreck who becomes nothing more than a walking ATM, powerless to stop handing her crisp 20's and becoming more pussified with each passing day. Not that I know anything about that.
The way to avoid becoming a PL is simply never believe anything a stripper tells you, and remember they are skilled actresses that rival some of Hollywood's finest.
So next time that beautiful dancer looks deeply into your eyes and says something like "I think I'm falling in love with you" or "wow, you're really cute" don't believe it for a second. Not even for one second. That's how the road to PLness begins.:O
The_Oceans
04-28-2006, 04:39 PM
Here's a link from Zbone.com to the ASS-C (alt.sex.strip-clubs) glossary:
http://www.zbone.com/zone/glossary.htm
Contains most common strip club and internet acronyms, as well as other terms specific to clubbing.
CarGuy
05-01-2006, 08:34 AM
I have figured out most of them...PL was easy....I am falling into that catagory at the momnet...short lived...but none the less some little minx has got my head messed up. Oh well.. the nature of the club
easy_e
05-01-2006, 09:10 AM
^ ^ ^
As long as you're not spending the milk money and are aware of being a PL, there's really no harm. It's a learning process and the absolute worst thing that can happen is that you get what you want. In my limited experience, dating strippers, relationships with strippers and stripper pussy are all overrated. But I'm sure there are exceptions.
dayzed
05-13-2006, 04:05 PM
^ ^ ^
As long as you're not spending the milk money and are aware of being a PL, there's really no harm. It's a learning process and the absolute worst thing that can happen is that you get what you want.
It was worth reading through this at times tedious thread just to arrive at this closing platitude. In addition to an almost absurd level of comic irony (given the author's preceding posts), this statement registers a cautionary note -- one underscored almost constantly as one reads through both pink and blue -- of the dangerously cyclical character of the PL dementia.
This site is a great resource. Should be required reading for fledgling clubbers. Now, the trick is to absorb the many lessons on display.
easy_e
05-14-2006, 08:17 AM
Sorry, this may may not be coherent as it is now 10am Sunday and I haven't slept since 5:30 am Friday. Life is so full of amazing coincindences that there must be some incomprehensible force conducting the orchestra of the universe to the melody of its own intense symphony, beautiful at its center but surrounded by the pain of human fallacy.
Since beginnning this thread, I made exactly 0 SC visits in March. In April, I ventured out once and immediately broke my rule about exchanging phone numbers. This one (A) didn't call as much as (N) who was the impetus for this thread, so I just let it go. Last Monday I found out that I "won" a "free" party at that SC for the following Friday (free cover, buffet, drinks) which is nothing more than a marketing tool. I decided to go anyway, with a wingman for protection.
I guess (A) knew about it because she called Friday to ask if I would be there.
After we were seated, (A) came over and we hugged. Suddenly I was transported into PL world and everything turned into a blur and all I could see was her. After closing, we went to my place because we were having too much fun and didn't want it to end. Basically, we talked for about 14 hours nonstop and found far too many similarities of life experience. Go ahead and call me a cuddle bitch b/c there was no sex.
She left a few hours ago and I haven't been able to sleep b/c of conflicting thoughts about emotions, feelings, ideas and reality. I realized that I needed to re-read this thread. Now I know exactly what to do. I just don't know if I can go to SC's anymore b/c I can't follow my own rules, and sometimes I do get what I want and it's the worst possible thing that could happen.
Sorry if this makes no sense, I've been awake for way too long and I can't tell.
yoda57us
05-14-2006, 10:40 AM
This is very simple. Eliminate money and the club from the equation. If she wants you and you want her neither of you really wants the club in the mix anyway.
kdogg247
05-14-2006, 10:42 AM
Go ahead and call me a cuddle bitch b/c there was no sex.
Cuddle bitch.
mr_punk
05-14-2006, 10:00 PM
Basically, we talked for about 14 hours nonstop and found far too many similarities of life experience. Go ahead and call me a cuddle bitch b/c there was no sex.well, i wouldn't call you a cuddle bitch because there was no sex.
She left a few hours ago and I haven't been able to sleep b/c of conflicting thoughts about emotions, feelings, ideas and reality.OTOH, i would call you a cuddle bitch over your inclination to become suddenly infatuated with a stripper you just paid to sit on your balls.
easy_e
05-15-2006, 06:51 AM
This is very simple. Eliminate money and the club from the equation. If she wants you and you want her neither of you really wants the club in the mix anyway.
Yes, I know. You are exactly right. The larger problem is that this seems to happen every time I go to a SC, and even though this one is breathtakingly beautiful by any standard (i mean absolutely fucking gorgeous) I can't overlook all the baggage she's managed to accumulate in her short life. I really don't want any more relationships with strippers, I just want to go to the SC and have fun.
It bothers me that I had my SS shield set to "max" and this happened anyway. I don't know why.
easy_e
05-15-2006, 07:18 AM
well, i wouldn't call you a cuddle bitch because there was no sex.
OTOH, i would call you a cuddle bitch over your inclination to become suddenly infatuated with a stripper you just paid to sit on your balls.
To paraphrase Voltaire, "if Mr. Punk did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him". However, there was not much ball-sitting or payment involved, and I was certainly not going to tell her "no you can't come home with me." My inclination to become suddenly infatuated with strippers is definitely a big problem, so I agree with you on that one.
CarGuy
05-15-2006, 03:20 PM
It appears that you go to strip clubs...not to enjoy the entertainment and ogle naked women...rather you like to "be their buddy". That is your enjoyment from going.
yoda57us
05-15-2006, 03:54 PM
It bothers me that I had my SS shield set to "max" and this happened anyway. I don't know why.
Lol, It's called self-control. Right now you are your own worst enemy when it comes to strip clubs and women. Have fun anyway, it never stopped me!
easy_e
05-16-2006, 08:24 AM
^^^^^
Thanks Yoda, it is fun and it always will be, I just like to bitch and I find this forum cathartic. I'm already over (A) because of her chain-smoking. I get caught up in my own BS sometimes. ;D
easy_e
05-16-2006, 08:49 AM
It appears that you go to strip clubs...not to enjoy the entertainment and ogle naked women...rather you like to "be their buddy". That is your enjoyment from going.
Not really, I think it has more to do with the dopamine and serotonin produced from the SC atmosphere and when I click with a certain dancer. Thats why I break all my rules. I could care less about the stage show and I can ogle naked women for free.
yoda57us
05-16-2006, 11:59 AM
^^^^^
Thanks Yoda, it is fun and it always will be, I just like to bitch and I find this forum cathartic. I'm already over (A) because of her chain-smoking. I get caught up in my own BS sometimes. ;D
e: Sometimes just reading your own words here is a great tool in figuring things out.
Even if you don't agree with some of the responses that get posted here a reasonable opposing view is always food for thought.
MinahSky
05-25-2006, 04:57 AM
I didnt' read all of the responses to the OP, but I dealt with this situation with a girl I danced with. The BS didn't end until we took her money every night and had the manager save it for her. Then we found her an apartment, got her a DL and a car. She was moved out by the time he got home one night and had no clue where she was. He was banned from the club and she started to work elsewhere anyway (but because he was banned from the original club, he thought she still worked there).
Why not get her an apartment and car since you have the means, and help her get a restraining order as well? That way you'll know that you are really doing some good. Then help her find a new club and an education while she's dancing so that when this is over for her, she has a trade.
Edited to add: Jenny, you freakin' rock! I have kept your email for that purpose you stated in your post, hope you dont' mind.