View Full Version : How do I love this baby?? :(
space_Cadet_28
09-07-2006, 04:01 PM
good luck whatever happens.
i'm sure the baby will be fine.
not to be critical but find better guys, no more kids, and plan out this life thing.
Xiomara
09-07-2006, 05:47 PM
First of all....I had money saved for an abortion...Shawn stole it. Then the next time I had the money together I couldnt go through with it. I did some dumb things, but that was months ago. Not saying it d oesnt matter that it was months ago, but thats why Im so upset because I did the things I did. Also I was on birth control and it still happened. Also, I do get prenatal care, thats why I have a ticker saying how far along and that its a girl. I told my doctor everything and I go to appts. every 2 weeks. I take vitamins and Im taking care ots f this baby now. The doc said she's healthy and everything looks good. I regret trying to hurt the baby. But Im trying to be the best I can now. I was going through a lot then and its no excuse, but I have changed how I feel about the baby. And its not that i dont WANT the baby.The thing that bothers me is that I dont know how to share my love with her and my 3 yr. old. Thats not sick.
AND NO SHAWN WAS NOT MY HUSBAND AND HES OUT OF MY LIFE FOR GOOD BECAUSE HE'S NOTHING GOOD FOR ME OR HIS DAUGHTER.
Well I need to go to work so I can support this child with my selfish self.
Xiomara
09-07-2006, 05:51 PM
And I did consider adoption. My mom was all set to adopt but I cant let my baby go like that. I said Ill do everything to raise her. If Im depressed, Ill still take care of her. Shes my baby. I wasnt thinking like that a few months ago, but I am now. Shes mine. Not Shawns. Thats what I keep reminding myself. I love her and Im sorry for the shit I did but Im doing my best right now to make sure she stays healthy. I would have killed a woman who did the things that I did, and Im sorry i did it, and I cant believe that I did. But I cant go back, all I can do is the best I can from now on.
Thanx
Xiomara
09-07-2006, 05:53 PM
good luck whatever happens.
i'm sure the baby will be fine.
not to be critical but find better guys, no more kids, and plan out this life thing.
Im getting my tubes tied after this baby. Im going to the military (Navy) if I can leave my baby for boot camp. Im not sure I can be away that long from her.
The doc said she'll be fine.
Xiomara
09-07-2006, 05:55 PM
Im confused entirely too much. I tried to read all the posts thats been about this pregnancy ..her past relationship and either the dates are wrong on the threads or something...
Shes due in like 2.5 months yet on a thread dated in May she didnt know yet. so .. what the hell or do i have my dates all fucked up
I didnt get prenatal care until August, thats y I didnt know due dates. Im due Nov. 16th.
Yekhefah
09-07-2006, 05:58 PM
I still think you should give the baby to a loving family since you're already planning to ditch her and pawn her off on relatives. It's pretty selfish to deny her a devoted, two-parent family just so you can feel better about yourself. But whatever, it's your kid and your wants are evidently more important than her needs.
Xiomara
09-07-2006, 05:59 PM
O yea, and I do talk to a doctor about the concerns I have. Ive cried to her about everything I told you guys. I know you are not doctors but its nice to talk to other women and see if Im the only one who feels happy/sad/disgusted/emotional/excited sometimes. Sorry.
SassyMom
09-07-2006, 06:07 PM
X - I hear you. I was so depressed the second time I was pregnant. I didn't want the baby because the timing was bad and we were poor... and I just didn't want another baby. I also have suffered from clinical depression all of my life. When I got pregnant, the doctor took me off my anti-depressants because they might harm the baby. I got so depressed that I was suicidal. My husband took me to the doctor - I completely fell apart in the doctor's office - bawling hysterically...She put me back on my meds and I was soooooo MUCH better in a week. My second child is 6 now and I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world....I really think you should talk to your doctor about the depression. There may be some actual help out there for you.
blondi553
09-07-2006, 06:08 PM
so u r just planning on leaving both of your children to go to the navy? i thought u loved ur first daughter to death ......im confused i guess....i hope everything gets sorted out and ur new daughter does go to a loving home whether its ur mom or another loving family.....
missalovelady
09-07-2006, 06:26 PM
I sure hope you have end up having a change of heart.You will be her mother and the center of her universe.What a heart breaking thing for a little girl if you feel weird towards her.I am sure once she will be about 4 or 5 she will pick up on it.What a miserable life from the start.I say just give her to a family that cant have children and give her a happy life.That way she will know her mother as someone who only feels happiness towards her.Not a grandma.Then she will wonder why she lives w/ grandma when her other friends live w/ their mommy.And she will wonder why her sister lives w/ mommy and not her.What a bad situation.Think about her before yourself and future before you really consider everything.I feel bad you went thru a bunch of shit w/ your ex,but why pass the buck onto her.I wish you luck.
TheSexKitten
09-07-2006, 06:41 PM
When I first got pregnant I did everything I could to cause a miscarriage..dancing as hard as I could,lifting heavy stuff, even took a bunch of pills out of anger when Shawn hit me,and starved myself.
a) maybe you should have considered abortion instead of pulling this
b) are you stable enough to handle a second kid?
c) consider adoption.
TheSexKitten
09-07-2006, 06:45 PM
I still think you should give the baby to a loving family since you're already planning to ditch her and pawn her off on relatives. It's pretty selfish to deny her a devoted, two-parent family just so you can feel better about yourself. But whatever, it's your kid and your wants are evidently more important than her needs.
Yeah.
My mom had 6 miscarriages before she finally was able to have me. Aside from the fact that you don't seem "set up" enough to be supporting a second child, trying to kill your unborn child is disgusting. Sorry. Kthxbye
was the charge a felony ? because if so you can't go into the army, miltary...marines etc.
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 02:24 AM
was the charge a felony ? because if so you can't go into the army, miltary...marines etc.
no, misdemeanor, which will be off my record next month because I wasn't guilty.
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 02:29 AM
so u r just planning on leaving both of your children to go to the navy? i thought u loved ur first daughter to death ......im confused i guess....i hope everything gets sorted out and ur new daughter does go to a loving home whether its ur mom or another loving family.....
I considered the Navy...a lot of mothers go to the Navy and have to leave kids with a family member for the 6 -8 weeks boot camp, then the children follow her wherever she goes. My daughters godparents are both in the Navy, chiefs who have had to leave their 2 kids while they were out to sea, but all live together now doing shore duty in San Diego.
And I do love my daughter more than anything in the world, Ive always been a good mother to her and she loves me just the same. I said I considered it, but dont think I could live them while I go to boot camp.
Maybe I should just forget about the Navy and the medical benefits for my girls,and all the support of the Family Fleet and Service Center that I could get for my girls. Maybe I shouldnt leave them for boot camp to better our lives. Ill just be a stripper forever. or a drug dealer. hmmm...
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 02:32 AM
Originally Posted by blondi553
"so u r just planning on leaving both of your children to go to the navy? i thought u loved ur first daughter to death ......im confused i guess....i hope everything gets sorted out and ur new daughter does go to a loving home whether its ur mom or another loving family....."
u made it sound like im wrong for wanting a career that will take care of us.
and my daughter will be with me.
LstDncMaryJane
09-08-2006, 02:34 AM
when my baby was born I actually thought I hated her for like an hour after birth when everyone left me to tend to her I resente her then they broughther in I picked her up was left alone with her and shed SOOO many tears because it was LOVE pure love I never felt before. I was ashamed at first for the resentment but I realized it was natural and the love showed me it was just a delusion
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 02:42 AM
I still think you should give the baby to a loving family since you're already planning to ditch her and pawn her off on relatives. It's pretty selfish to deny her a devoted, two-parent family just so you can feel better about yourself. But whatever, it's your kid and your wants are evidently more important than her needs.
What the f*ck ever. The reason Im so worried now is because her needs are more important to me than myself.
And you say I plan on DITCHING HER AND PAWNING HER OFF?????? I already said a million times, i considered adoption...which is, the way u make it sound "DITCHING HER AND PAWNING HER OFF".I considered a relative because I don't want somebody I dont know raising her, possible abusing her. And i wouldnt feel better about myself if I gave her up. I never said its about myself. I SAID --if u could read-- that I am keeping her. I SAID that I will love her, because shes my baby. The whole point of this thread wan't even this serious. I wanted to know how many other mothers feels like they wont love their kids as much as the first. We all know I fucked up in the start, and it kills me everyday, but now Im doing the best I can to take care of myself and her. I made a mistake, you dont need to keep pointing that out. Im doing my best now,and paying for the mistakes I made,and praying everyday that she is born healthy,like the doctor said she would. Im finished.Ill let you all know when shes born. Thanx for the advice to those who know how I feel.
MishaBliss
09-08-2006, 04:13 AM
You made this thread serious. When you write about all the ways you tried to damage your pregnant self, you are going to get alot of concerned women voicing their opinions.
Oh, and depression is a sickness.
Rhiannon
09-08-2006, 07:22 AM
^Exactly. You know, it fucking cracks me up when people ask for opinions/advice, and then they bitch and moan when they get it. Xio, you say the thread wasn't serious, but when you throw in the methods you used to tried to end your unborn baby's life on your own, that makes it pretty fucking serious. Don't blame others for getting pissed off after you shared that.
danijamesxxx
09-08-2006, 07:47 AM
I have to agree. Not trying to be a bitch but grow up.........stop asking a message board for all the answers. Your life is your life. When you post stuff like this, you have to expect that some of us are going to be mad or alarmed about it.
missalovelady
09-08-2006, 09:18 AM
If you think the baby would be adopted out to a strangers,you are wrong.The people who adopt pay for your pregnancy and birth ,you get to meet them and you could get an open adoption where you get to visit every so often.It wouldnt be so bad.Whats worse you trying to kill the baby by trying to give yourself a misscarriage or giving the baby away to a caring family who cant have kids?You have to not be so self centered and stubborn for anything to work out properly.I feel pity for this unborn baby.
destiny2980
09-08-2006, 10:31 AM
When I had my first I couldnt stand to be a mother it took me months to warm up to my son. I cried and wished I had a abortion when I had the chance. I was so selfish and all I wanted was to go and party and spend my money on myself. I wasnt ready and I knew it. But something happen and I cant really say what it was that just made me fall so in love. Suddenly I didnt matter anymore. Suddenly the world revolved around this tiny little person that loved me more than anyone in my life ever had.
What your going through is normal I think. But the decision is yours. Adoption is an amazing option for women and if your truly not ready then it could be in the best intrest of the child too. Just know that your decision will affect you for the rest of your life. If you give the child up will you regret it? And if you keep it I promise one day you will fall so head over heels in love with it that you will wonder how you ever considered anything but keeping it.
Good luck I hope you find peace with your decision.
Destiny
Paisley
09-08-2006, 10:41 AM
What your going through is normal I think.
Attempted suicide and intentional physical self harm are not normal behaviors. You can't compare them with shopping too much and partying.
I want things to work out for Xiomara for whatever she chooses but she really needs to tie up some loose ends and be responsible and get the help that she needs
Yekhefah
09-08-2006, 12:13 PM
Adoption is not ditching your child, it is providing for her by giving her two loving parents (and every child deserves that). Ditching your child is foisting her upon relatives so that you can run around and do what you like, leaving her to wonder why her mother doesn't want her.
I do believe that every child deserves two loving, devoted parents. And I believe that those who cannot provide that kind of love and stability should abort or give the child to someone who can provide it. Just my opinion.
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 01:01 PM
I know what I did in the startwas serious, I didnt say that was. Ok, maybe I shouldnt have said that. You guys are right.
You guys seem like Im saying " I dont care about the baby, Im still trying to kill her, I plan on leaving her in the dumpster, I still take pills."
I apologized to this baby a million times for what I did. I took the pills after a huge fight with Shawn. I did the smartest thing I could and got him out of my life so he wont keep bringing me and this baby down. Anybody notcie that? Im doing the best I can now,knowing the mistakes I made.
knew I was gonna get good advice and a lot of mean sounding posters,I was expecting that. I dont want everything to be sugar coated.
Anyways...Im just posting now to say that my daughter was rubbing my belly this morning and got THE BIGGEST smile on her face when the baby kicked. I told her she would be a big sister and she got so excited and said "will she wear little diapers?" i said yes and she said " i can be a big sister?" she was so excited, and i feel so much better about this baby, knowing that my 3yr. old is so excited. The whole point of this post is that I was worried that my 3 yr. old wouldnt feel like i loved her the same. I felt like I wouldnt love the baby the same. But now that my little girl is so excited to have a lil sister, I feel like all my doubts are erased. My neighbor works at an insurance agency, and they need a secratary in when the other one has her baby. So i got something lined up, but not for a couple weeks.
Yekhefah
09-08-2006, 02:46 PM
I'm glad to hear that things are looking up.
I am CONFUSED. I've read this thread and reread it and it makes little to no sense. While its possible you are telling the truth and having a change of heart, in my eyes it seems more like back peddling.
Or defending yourself ., reasons etc by saying we are all reading it wrong . Each and every person on this site is going off of what they read. If you put it out there and ask opinions that's what you are going to get., based on what you've said. We are all coming to the same conclusions.
In my opinon you aren't thinking rational and havent been for awhile. Maybe its due to the stress or maybe its just who you are and how you handle things. But judging from what i've read from when you were in legal trouble and missed a court date , to him stealing your car ..to him beating you to this. its a pattern. Its the entire " its their fault that this is happening to me " . To even get arrested to start with isn't very mature or adult for a mother. Or to even be in a situation that warrents an arrest. Why would you even associate with people that live fucked up lives? I dont get that. Where was your daugther during all of this?
While its not correct or morally right for people to steal, lie, cheat or hurt another person physically its not just "them". By sticking around and allowing this person in your life you were allowing them to do these things. There by in my head, your fault. You can say well he hit me. Well didnt he do fucked up shit before? So why did you feel the need to bring him back in? THere is something lacking within you that allows you to accept this kind of behavior. And dont say its because you loved him. Thats a weak ass fucking excuse. Because you gotta love yourself more. You gotta love your daughter more then to grow up thinking this is how grownups live their lives. That this is how men and women love each other. Your life is what she will base hers off of .
We only surround ourselves with people that compliment us. Be it friends or lovers. Our friends and lovers are direct reflections of ourselves. Imo you were with a shitty man because you've been a shitty person yourself. If you were upstanding and forthright youd be with the same. I've been with shitty people myself. and why? because at the time I was a self serving shitty person .
You seem like a lost soul. I dont know your age. Although it was mentioned before. But your actions seem of a 15 year old girl. Your rationality is immature. You cannot go in the marines. I hate to break it to you, but its not going to solve your problems. Your have kids. you have people that are before you. Going away for 6 weeks to bootcamp. then possibly off for years is NOT an option. You have GOT to find a job here , you have to be a mom full time. You signed up for that when you decided to have children. Leaving them in your mothers care is unfair and fucked. Although if you are going to continue to fall in the pattern of dating dumbasses and being self destructive maybe it would be for the best. But your mother has raised her kids. Why in the hell should she be raising yours? She did an amazing thing by offering to help you. Thank her for the offer and get off your lazy self loathing ass and do it yourself. Shes there to catch you when you fall, she's not there to continue raising you or your kids. Let her have a life with a daughter that has her shit together. IE get your shit together.
I dont find pity in your situation. I got pregnant at 16 and was homeless. And im not talking just living with friends , that kinda homeless. I lived in a fucking shelter and was a throw away. If I can raise 2 kids on my fucking own, and come out of that mess then there is no excuse anyone can give me that I will accept., for them failing.
You have to get over it and get on. You can start anew but its not going to be handed to you. It seems that you expect things a certain way. Given your situation and the direness of it , you can't be choosey.
You have your health, a home..a car. You can get a job. Its not about what will make you happy to do. Because guess what., this isnt about you and what you want to do. Its about surviving. And if you have to work 2 jobs both paying 8.50 an hour doing shit you can't "stand" well man up. Because you have 2 kids that need their mom. And sure you'll be working a lot but they'll still have mommy home to tuck them in at night and wake them up in the morning. Something you can't do if you are off at bootcamp. Something you can't do if your mother is raising them.
Girls have been more then helpful here with suggestions on how to earn money. To scouf at a suggestion because you feel it is pathetic just shows how lazy you are to do something. You can pass newspapers in the morning, you can babysit in the afternoon... Hell work at Mcdonalds. I mean there is always something. But instead you are sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. your pity party isnt going to keep the lights on., and formula
And where is this new boyfriend? Where is he in all of this?
I think you need to do some deep self digging. Because something is amiss. You are and imo been self destructive forawhile. Maybe its depression , or maybe its something deeper that you need to overcome.
Im not sure if you have a faith in a highpower of any sorts. But I do believe that there is nothing in this world that is placed upon us that we cannot over come. If you have a self defietist ( spelling) attitude in life you will have a very painful , unhappy life that you'll regret being involved in.
If you are not in a place in your life to raise two kids, then you need to do whats best for them. And you need to get your shit together. Attempting to abort by yourself, is such an extreme act of desperation and immaturity that I cannot believe for a second you arent a ticking time bomb in other ways as well. If you were a 15 year old girl or a woman with an abusive husband that controlled finances I could understand the desperation. But you weren't and aren't. So no excuse in the world will make me go " oh okay I understand ".
Yekhefah
09-08-2006, 03:14 PM
<wild applause>
What a great post, Tart. You said it all and much better than I could!
TheSexKitten
09-08-2006, 03:35 PM
*swoon*
My mom needs this tailored to the way she's behaving right now (tangent for another time).
Well said.
MishaBliss
09-08-2006, 03:42 PM
Please read Tarts post, and before you jump into self defence mode REALLY think about what is being said.
Well posted Tart! ;)
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 03:54 PM
First of all, I along with my brothers and sisters were taken from my mother when I was 9 because she neglected and abused me. She did not raise me, and I swore to myself that I'd be a better mother to my 3 yr. old than she was to me. And i lived up to that. My girl lives with her dad (my ex husband) a few miles from here because he is going over seas soon (in the Navy) and he wanted to spend as much time with her as he could before he left. I never hit her, i had a great pregnancy,at the age of 18 she was born and was spoiled. I see her everyday and we read books, go to the park...do everything a mother should do with her daughter. I was poor and had no car when she was born, and was here in Fl. with no family. I did it all on my own, no problem. Im not a bad mother.
Second, I had posted before about Shawn. I thought I could change him. I thought I could get him off the drugs (which he wasnt on when we met,and when he did start, his it from me) When he started doin the fucked up shit, I kept trying to change him and forgiving him. Until he stole my car and money. Thats the last time I saw him when I realized I deserve better..back on Mothers Day. And my little girl never met him. My ex and I agreed that we would not involve her with our relationships unless they are healthy and serious. I never brought her around Shawn and Im glad I didnt.
On my other thread, a girl posted a few job ideas and I thanked her. I looked in the paper and found a few good things. Im not being picky. I never said I was. The ONLY thing i didnt like was phone sex. Ill work and do anything when I quit dancing. I thanked everybody for the suggestions, and Ill thank them again. Thank you to all who suggested work. I found a few things I can do.But it is kinda hard getting around my area without a car that I used to have. But I got things lined up and Im ok as far as that goes.
AND DIDNT I FUCKIN SAY IM NOT GIVING HER TO MY MOTHER , IM KEEPING HER. I had said earlier that my mom said she will adopt if I cant handle it on my own. I never said SHE IS TAKING HER. it was an option but IM KEEPING HER BECAUSE SHES MINE. shit.
I thought about the military, but like I said before, I cant leave my girls that long. Ill miss them too much. But im not the only one in the world who has left or considered leaving to go to the military to benefit their families. Im not going because I cant leave my babies that long.
And its no excuse, but it wasnt until I left Shawn for good that I loved myself more than a man could love me. I thought I needed him, and I didnt. These days Im pretty picky about who I talk to. All I do is work and go home work and go home work and go home. I dont drink,smoke,party,nothing. I got a friend who helps me out with things around here. He's a good guy, and this time I know what to look for. He's very supportive of me and this baby. He keeps my house clean when he comes over, he carries the groceries for me,anything I need he'll do his best. But we're not serious. I dont want to get serious with anybody right now. Im learning that I need to love myself and that Im better than all the shit Shawn put me through. All the shit I LET HIM put me through because I thought he loved me. Off topic.
I thought a l ot about things and after seeing the look on my daughters face, I feel so much better. I know what I gotta do and Im gonna do it. Wait and see. Im not as fucked as you all think.
well then marked me confused because NONE of this makes any sense to me. I wouldnt' even view shit as an option for my mother to adopt ( as was stated in another thread.) if I was taken from her.
And i wouldnt have another period point blank If I couldnt even raise the first.
I still stick by what I wrote. Even in reading what you've posted in response to, if not more so ... I think it rings true.
Xiomara
09-08-2006, 05:49 PM
U DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER AND I NEVER SAID I COULDNT RAISE HER.IVE BEEN THERE FOR HER SINCE DAY ONE AND IM THERE FOR HER DAMN DAY OF HER LIFE SO DONT TELL ME SHIT ABOUT I CANT RAISE HER. SHE LIVES WITH HER FATHER NOW BECAUSE HE'S GOING OVERSEAS AND HE WANTS HER AROUND MORE UNTIL HE LEAVES. I DIDNT SAY I CANT RAISE HER.
and my mother is a good woman, despite the shit she went through due to alcohol abuse.I would never doubt her abilities to raise this baby IF i were to let her adopt my child. And why all of a sudden is it such a problem for a family member to adopt? People consider it all the time. AND NOBODY IS ADOPTING THIS BABY!
If your so damn confused then leave it alone. I heard everything you said, and for being on a message board, your right about a lot of things but some shit you crossed the line.But again, we are on boards and you don't know me. I said Im feeling better about things and you still attacking me. Im ready for this baby, I got everything I need for her.Im ready and my little girl is ready.
MishaBliss
09-08-2006, 05:59 PM
I feel so sorry for your children.
danijamesxxx
09-08-2006, 06:14 PM
I do too, I hope you don't pass your scars onto them. Just think, they could turn out just like their mom. Ok, that was kind of harsh, but you need to smarten up seriously. And hopefully you will, so good luck.
Yekhefah
09-08-2006, 06:16 PM
Throwing bricks at a concrete wall accomplishes very little.
Might be time to close the thread.
I do agree.
Where's that fucking suri thread when we need it.
Lysondra
09-08-2006, 06:49 PM
Throwing bricks at a concrete wall accomplishes very little.
Might be time to close the thread.
You may make a dent, but it'll never go through.
Look ma, I'm confucious!
Yekhefah
09-08-2006, 06:57 PM
:laughing:
obscurity
09-08-2006, 09:50 PM
you were on a roll tart! did you even stop to breathe? it flowed so smoothly! whats that song........TELL IT LIKE IT IS........
Xiomara
09-09-2006, 12:44 AM
I feel so sorry for your children.
------- (that was supposed to be the word id call you if i knew you, but i dont pass judgement no matter how fucked up you sound)you dont know shit about my daughter,she the smartest, sweetest, most beautiful being ive ever known, and I DID THAT ALONG WITH HER DADDY. I raised her well. Have you all not paid attention to my last few posts? I did have a change of heart, sudden but I did. All it took was a smile on my little girls face about being a big sister. Thats what I was scared about.
Im not perfect like you all seem to think you are. I made mistakes...months ago. And Im now doing the best I can to reverse that shit. Ive had 3 ultra sounds, all came back perfectly fine. A child WILL be born into this world happy and healthy, and Ill keep her that way. Me and her big sister. Keep on bashing a mother to be. Thats real sweet. Just what I was in the mood for at 3am after a long night of work, makin the money to buy the car seat this baby needs.
Im done posting here because nobody seems to see the fact that I AM ready for this child. and that she IS healthy,and that I AM excited to raise her to be as intelligent and amazing as Ahrie, Thanks for the advice that was given in the start,but this thread got way out of hand....maybe Ill come back and post pics when shes born.
Urafag
09-09-2006, 01:54 AM
I'm sorry guys this just dose'nt seem real to me.
Rhiannon
09-09-2006, 05:16 AM
------- (that was supposed to be the word id call you if i knew you, but i dont pass judgement no matter how fucked up you sound)you dont know shit about my daughter,she the smartest, sweetest, most beautiful being ive ever known, and I DID THAT ALONG WITH HER DADDY. I raised her well. Have you all not paid attention to my last few posts? I did have a change of heart, sudden but I did. All it took was a smile on my little girls face about being a big sister. Thats what I was scared about.
Im not perfect like you all seem to think you are. I made mistakes...months ago. And Im now doing the best I can to reverse that shit. Ive had 3 ultra sounds, all came back perfectly fine. A child WILL be born into this world happy and healthy, and Ill keep her that way. Me and her big sister. Keep on bashing a mother to be. Thats real sweet. Just what I was in the mood for at 3am after a long night of work, makin the money to buy the car seat this baby needs.
Im done posting here because nobody seems to see the fact that I AM ready for this child. and that she IS healthy,and that I AM excited to raise her to be as intelligent and amazing as Ahrie, Thanks for the advice that was given in the start,but this thread got way out of hand....maybe Ill come back and post pics when shes born.
Nobody who's responded thinks they're perfect. They (myself included) just think it's fucked up that you would try to cause harm to your unborn child, on more than one occasion, and in more ways than one.
I STRONGLY advise you again to get help. Don't wait until after the baby's born. The time to do it is NOW, because you'll be juggling two children and all the responsibilities that go along with them. It's not easy, and you need to make sure that you're going to be able to handle it. You can say that you are until you're blue-in-the-face, but you won't know until that baby gets here.
Also, Ultrasounds only show so much. Not saying it to scare you, but it's true. There's a lot that they don't show.
I do wish you luck. I do wish you a healthy baby. Just make sure that you are prepared to handle it.
MishaBliss
09-09-2006, 05:16 AM
I feel so sorry for your children.[QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Xiomara]------- (that was supposed to be the word id call you if i knew you, but i dont pass judgement no matter how fucked up you sound).
Firstly. What word are you talking about... 'for' maybe? Idiot. You just proved my point.
Secondly. In which part do i sound 'fucked up'? The taking time to try and advise your sorry ass or reading your retarded responses? The latter maybe.
Thirdly. I used to feel sorry for your children. Now i just hate them. They are, after all, yours.
We didn't ask for judgement. You did. Someone else's judgement of your situation CAN be constructive...but you'd know that if you had some class.
aussiepunkshocker
09-09-2006, 06:16 AM
I think someone should close this thread.
aussiepunkshocker
09-09-2006, 06:21 AM
Adoption is not ditching your child, it is providing for her by giving her two loving parents (and every child deserves that). Ditching your child is foisting her upon relatives so that you can run around and do what you like, leaving her to wonder why her mother doesn't want her.
I do believe that every child deserves two loving, devoted parents. And I believe that those who cannot provide that kind of love and stability should abort or give the child to someone who can provide it. Just my opinion.
Whilst that sounds ideal, I think it's a crock. My mum never married and had me all by herself (yes and look at me, lol). But seriously two parent families are no guarentee of a better upbringing than a one parent family. Im glad I had just one parent!
aussiepunkshocker
09-09-2006, 06:52 AM
Sorry for the three posts in a row, but for some reason I cant edit.
I think people should lay off with the nastyness!
Theres also no point picking at things which are impossible to change such as abortion and the charge and whatever thoughts Xiomara has had or having. For one thing the emotional stuff shes been going through isnt so unusual. Many pregnant women go through this type of thing it need a doctor or counciler not nastyness. The pregnant mind can be a real bitch belive me! No-one should be saying anything nasty about her kids or parenting ability. Im sure many of us came from harsh beginnings and out of that we are ever stronger. I know I wouldnt change my life for the world and my beginnings were not ideal. I certainly dont hate my mum or family for it though.
And whoever said she hates her kids should just fucking grow up and really think about that statement. It would be stupid for me to hate your parents for instance because they had you wouldnt it?
So far I dont believe Ive come across anyone on this board who is perfect and never made a mistake, so lets all just ease up a little. You know the saying - if you cant say anything nice...
MishaBliss
09-09-2006, 08:02 AM
From what i can see...she asked for advice. We gave her advice and she became abusive. She doesn't seem to want to listen. To imply that people are being nasty for the sake of being nasty is ignorant.
Not one person here professed to be perfect.
The saying 'if you haven't anything nice to say' is the most blinded ignorant saying there is. That's the school of thought that has left the world in the mess it is today. IMO.
aussiepunkshocker
09-09-2006, 08:15 AM
^^^ Well we shall disagree on that wont we? Im all for saying what needs to be said, but this thread has become ridiculous and gone too far.
BTW hating someones children is hardly constructive or building a better planet.