Log in

View Full Version : Stop fingering me, dammit.



Pages : 1 [2]

sassfire
11-09-2006, 04:22 PM
Scott in another thread you started you titled it "The worst hustle". Your first example was "Telling the custy I'm so horny".

My response was this:

***That hustle sucks. Is she implying that she will screw the guy? Is so then score for him, if not she is a tease. Giving the custy any false hope or indication that you will give him extras or have sex with him is not a good idea. You never know if that custy is a cop, and you can explain that you were only joking at the police station. This will take 1 day, if you get arrested on a a weekend, it will take 2 to 3 days.***

My point stands firm, there is nothing wrong with teasing and that is dancers job. There is something wrong with crossing that line though.

Scout
11-09-2006, 04:23 PM
You are right he doesn't have a right to touch you. Dancing 1-2 feet away is a safe distant and if a custy takes the effort to get reach out and touch you then he is wrong. Hopefully you will remind him of the rules again. If he tries again, then it is confirmed that the custy is an ass. However you are going to tell me that some dancers don't get way too close and gripe that the custy has violated her?

I have worked in high contact clubs as well. I still expected them to obey the rules I spelled out.

Scout
11-09-2006, 04:25 PM
Scott in another thread you started you titled it "The worst hustle". Your first example was "Telling the custy I'm so horny".

My response was this:

***That hustle sucks. Is she implying that she will screw the guy? Is so then score for him, if not she is a tease. Giving the custy any false hope or indication that you will give him extras or have sex with him is not a good idea. You never know if that custy is a cop, and you can explain that you were only joking at the police station. This will take 1 day, if you get arrested on a a weekend, it will take 2 to 3 days.***

My point stands firm, there is nothing wrong with teasing and that is dancers job. There is something wrong with crossing that line though.

If she states the rules ...

Crow
11-09-2006, 04:28 PM
I KNOW!

sassfire, where is this magical place where all it takes is 1-2 feet of air to prevent a man from taking advantage of a dancer during her dance? Some dancers try to change up a dance by turning their back on the guy momentarily.......In this magic place you work, do magic eyes sprout out of the dancer's back to prevent the sneaky customer hand or tongue? Inquiring minds want to know.....::)


Hey yeah! I want to know to, because obviously you make money. I want to go to this dream land where no man can touch me because the no neck bounder is happily watching and or looking on from time to time.

YES YES YES! I want to know where this land is that the drunk patron will quietly sit there, tip well and keep his hands to himself. Oh Phuuulease tell us so we can go there too.

madmaxine
11-09-2006, 04:46 PM
The ISSUE with SOME strip club customers is that they have a raging boner that has sucked all the blood out of their brain & sometimes it does not matter if they're under the influence of any mood-altering chemical. They'll still try to take liberties during a dance.

Emily
11-09-2006, 04:48 PM
all I gotta say is....at least offer the courtesy to lick your finger first. Especially if you try to shove it up my butt.

(my magic force field is in the shop)

and seriously...have you ever tried to jab your finger in their nose after one of these incidents? it's delightfully refreshing to see the look of shock and disgust on their faces.

madmaxine
11-09-2006, 04:50 PM
all I gotta say is....at least offer the courtesy to lick your finger first. Especially if you try to shove it up my butt.

(my magic force field is in the shop)

Emily just gave me a great idea. The next time a customer crosses me, he's getting "The Rusty Hook" (from "Jackass.") OH yeah. Hahahahahahah!!!

Emily
11-09-2006, 04:51 PM
I forgot what the rusty hook is. Refresh my memory.

madmaxine
11-09-2006, 04:58 PM
The Rusty Hook is when you rub your finger in the crack of your butt to put bacteria on it (similar to the Butt Handshake Jason Lee kept doing in "Mallrats.") You then rub your finger in "someone's" eye. Voila, pinkeye.

I thought this was so awful when I saw it on "Jackass" but it's a more subversive way to punish a customer who thinks it's funny to put fingers in anyone's butt area.

Crow
11-09-2006, 05:00 PM
The ISSUE with SOME strip club customers is that they have a raging boner that has sucked all the blood out of their brain & sometimes it does not matter if they're under the influence of any mood-altering chemical. They'll still try to take liberties during a dance.

Sassfire, I want to thank you...for giving me the biggest laugh I have had in years. If I ever work at your club I'll recognize you from the magic force field that envelops you & has prevented you from suffering the indignities that the majority of dancers have encountered at work. Are you Superman's sister? /:O


Plus the issue with some patrons is the fact that they think that we as dancers are required to suck their dick AND let them do whatever they want to us ( this includes you ) - plus if you are so blissfully ignorent to think that what you say and ANYthing that you do will stop some panty sniffing moron from trying to grab you. Then, more power to you, because ( since you live in Vegas and all ) dammit, I want to work at the club YOU work at because I know it's got to be heaven there.

Scout
11-09-2006, 05:03 PM
The Rusty Hook is when you rub your finger in the crack of your butt to put bacteria on it (similar to the Butt Handshake Jason Lee kept doing in "Mallrats.") You then rub your finger in "someone's" eye. Voila, pinkeye.

I thought this was so awful when I saw it on "Jackass" but it's a more subversive way to punish a customer who thinks it's funny to put fingers in anyone's butt area.

This is the ...

BEST IDEA IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

Thanks!

forcefit
11-09-2006, 10:12 PM
punchline was a mouth on my nippleGuys should just think about how many other guys just brushed their lips and tongues there before they do that...ew. :-\

Jo Weldon
11-09-2006, 10:55 PM
It could be said that we shouldn't be taking off our clothes in public if we don't want the men to think they can have us. By taking off our clothes in front of them and looking them in the eye, we lose the right to say "No." Precisely the same logic. The whole point of a strip joint is that the women's nudity and seductive, even overtly sexually suggestive, behavior has different connotations (with some exceptions, duh) than in other bars.

Men are helpless morons with no self-control--NOT. Saying they're not responsible for their behavior is the same as claiming that they're insane or infantile. They can handle it. If I didn't respect men I wouldn't believe they had the facility to know the difference--but they do know the difference.


You shouldn't even be getting that close to make him think that he can touch it. Yes dancers do pull that "I didn't mean it shit" all the time. If you don't want a custy touching you in a specific place,then don't shove it in his face.

Embyr
11-09-2006, 10:56 PM
My favorite line to all the customers who try to slide underneath me on the bed (bed dances in a private room in an extras club god my club is such a whorehouse arrrrrgh) to lick my pussy is "if you do that, how many guys do you expect to be kissing?"

I HATE when they try that, or try to pull me up to be sitting on their face- i'm pretty light and sometimes this is unexpected, and I usually escape, but THEn the argument ensues....

"Why won't you let me lick those beautiful pussy lips??" (I have really long labia)
"because it's beyond my boundaries, and if I let you do it, how many other guys do you think would be eating me out, too?"

some assholes just WON't Stop!!
"but I want to give you pleasure! I wanna see you come! I wanna lick you! Pleeeeeeze!

how the HELL do i deal with this...
my club is tough- high-contact, guy expeCTS a lot... selling your dance is everything, lots of grindeage keeps fingers away, yes my boobs are touchable but DON"t Bite pleeeze those rings are sensitive... you may grab my butt but don't shove anything there, come on!! lots of guys just whip it out, many come with condoms... it's sad. i do my best to get multiple dances out of these pervs while by no means fulfilling his very high expectations- often i'll just finger myself.

but WHAt to do about "lemme-eat-u-out-custy?"?? help!

sander8son
11-09-2006, 11:03 PM
i still dont get why guys want to eat out or finger a stripper. Id rather pay her to work for me, than pay her to sit back while i work on her. its backwards thinking.


Guys should just think about how many other guys just brushed their lips and tongues there before they do that...ew.

Ehh, its no different than making out with a guy. and who here hasn't done that? Ok, maybe some of you haven't, but how many people here have ever made out with a stranger or two before? Same swap of fluids. If anything, less chance on contacting a virus as they wont be as live once dried. heh, kinda gross, but it doesn't bother me.

I guess a good way to back away from the guys who want to finger you/eat you out would be to say your period is starting and any minute the dam could break....ofcorse, that may turn some guys on, who knows.

Embyr
11-09-2006, 11:21 PM
that's actually a really good idea, sandy.... a 24/7 period... i am serious.... because tampons are invisible (hopefully) in stripslubs anyway, custy's wouldn't know yay or nay, but it would be a good discouraging remark... "kitty's bleeding, git-away-from-there." hahah much more persuasive than arguing over "boundaries" for the entire dance. god i feel like such so uptight.... but there are just those CERTAIN guys that GROSS and ANGER the hell out of me so that I will go reverse cowgirl as much of our dances as possible so I don't have to look them in the eye, try to grind them to a pulp, and make the most HIDEOUS faces at the wall opposite me. :beaver: :banghead: :censored:

for the most part i do like my customers and even if they're pervs they still respect me enough to more than tolerate them.

Embyr
11-09-2006, 11:29 PM
sorry, that post made about as much grammatical sense as I did in Ireland's Temple Bar... i should try actually re-reading my post when I revise too many things in it.

sander8son
11-09-2006, 11:29 PM
that's actually a really good idea, sandy.... a 24/7 period... i am serious.... because tampons are invisible (hopefully) in stripslubs anyway, custy's wouldn't know yay or nay, but it would be a good discouraging remark...

I know its a good idea. But don't encourage me :-P I guess it was my female side that thought it up, because the male side is worthless



for the most part i do like my customers and even if they're pervs they still respect me enough to more than tolerate them.
That pretty much sums me up right there. A respectful pervert.

Scout
11-10-2006, 12:03 AM
i still dont get why guys want to eat out or finger a stripper. Id rather pay her to work for me, than pay her to sit back while i work on her. its backwards thinking.

Many pervs say they want to "pleasure" me too.

Jenny
11-10-2006, 12:25 AM
You shouldn't even be getting that close to make him think that he can touch it. Yes dancers do pull that "I didn't mean it shit" all the time. If you don't want a custy touching you in a specific place,then don't shove it in his face.
Oh, little bunny - if in fact you are a bunny - this is beyond retarded. The entire point is to make the dance as hot and as close as possible while staying within the confines of the rules. And the customers (here's the kicker) KNOW this. They realize that they are not on a date, in a situation in which a vagina shoved in their face is an invitation to eat it out. Customers understand the context of a strip club. It is not that they are too dumb to know what they are paying for, and what we do for money. It is that they sometimes choose to ignore it and do things anyway.

There is nothing wrong with giving an inch. I give out multiple inches every night I dance. I can give an inch and say "This is it. This is your inch. This is the totality of your inch. Get it? This is what you get" and completely, in any ethical, legal or moral way expect the guy to stay within those inchy boundaries. Saying that I CAN'T give an inch because then I OWE them a mile is beyond regressive. It is full out stupid.

Kaiyla
11-10-2006, 01:24 AM
^^^^^^^^100% agreed.
Our club was the same -kitty as CLOSE as we felt comfortable putting it in the customers face. Mere inches. In the 5 years that I worked there, I was never licked and only heard the lengendary tale of one dancer (ONE, out of 75 of us) being licked. That customer caught a boot heel from the corner of his eye to his ear, and that's because he did NOT have any right. NONE. Doesn't matter how effin close you are. Whoever made the comment that "if proximity can be used against us, perhaps we shouldn't be taking our clothes off to begin with" was RIGHT on the ball. If they can't remain within the boundries, it is their price to pay. As Jenny said, you lay out the boundries and you don't have to give anymore just because of what the closeness "implies."

colleen
11-10-2006, 07:31 AM
Here is another situation. Where I work (hopefully not for too much longer) the custys are getting so grabby that you do not have to be close to them, you do not have to be dancing for them, and in fact you do not even have to be talking to or paying them any attention, and they will STILL grab you and violate your boundaries. In my bar girls can wear most anything. I almost always wear some type of street clothes, like a sexy slacks outfit or a cocktail dress or even an evening gown. Seriously, NOTHING is on display until I start the dance. And YET . . . I have had guys grab my boobs and even my crotch while I was just walking past them, on my way somewhere else. They LOVE to grab my fully-dressed cookie just after they refuse to buy a dance from me, while I am standing a good 1-2 feet away from them and not touching them at all. One even leaned over and licked my arm while i was giving a back rub to somebody else.

So sassfire, sorry to say, your whole argument that we are bringing this treatment on ourselves falls apart.

As to the OP, I have no idea why they do this. I thin like somebody said, not enough mamas slapped their little boys' hands and said "NO TOUCHING!" at the appropriate time in their lives.

Bella21
11-10-2006, 09:31 AM
I was thinking about this yesterday... This guy kept trying to stick his fingers in my ass, lick me grab my crotch, get his fingers around my shorts... It was such a BATTLE with this dude! He even did that thing where they twist your hand around and try to force it on their dick. I. Fucking. Hate. That!! (Then, he made sure to pay me the EXACT amount for the dances... Fucking asshole)

Anyways, I kept thinking... "Dude, YOU came in HERE for MY services... do you think I OWE something to you??"

sassfire
11-10-2006, 09:45 AM
Yes there are the men who will attempt to touch you as you walk by, that is the nature of the club. It is ths atmosphere that the club codones. I consider this sort playful touching. Of course if the custy is full out grabbing you, then the mgt should throw his ass out. What I am refering to are the dancers who deliberately and repeatedly rub themselves up against a custy, say overly suggestive sexually leading promises, and get within centimeters of a custy touch. A dancers knows what is going to far is. The custy doesn't have the right to touch, sure but when a dancer is sending him mixed signals that it is okay to touch, he will take advantage of those signals.

Yes, I have had custy attempt to touch me while giving a dance and I replace their hands to the bottom of the chair. A dancer is fooling herself when she thinks that a custy will not try or isn't thinking about touching her. I'm not going to urge him on more by dancing extremely close to him. If I do, I better expect for him to think that he is allowed touch me. The only part of the body that should be touching a guy during a dance is your thighs and his lower thighs. If he can't get a good view of what he wants to see in that position then tough for him. He can use his imagination.

I was nice when giving dances, I will give the guy lots of chances if he tried to touch me. I have seen other dances give the guy zero chances. One touch and she is out of there. No, ifs, ands, or buts. A dancer hopefully has laid out the rules before starting a dance and the custy is aware of them. If a custy touches then she is in no obligation to continue the dance. He has violated one of her rules and in some clubs the club's rules. When that dancer is overtly and repeatedly brushes against a custy or places her vagina within licking distance from a man's face, that is a hard hypocritical invitation not to accept for a man. A dancer can also immediately end the dance. She is the one who choices to end the dance when his touching annoys her. If no touching means no touching then the dancer should not be touching him either. Every innocent touch she does is a touch and a violation of her rules. In a custy mind, if she can break her own rules, I guess it is okay for me to break them too. A dancer doesn't have to continue a dance, that is why it is best to always get the money first.

Laylas
11-10-2006, 11:02 AM
I think it's kind of like.....*scratches head and thinks of a metaphor* swimming with sharks. Ordinary civillians are like "WTF, are you crazy?! You are just ASKING to get bitten!" But if you have been around sharks before, know their ways, know how they think, know the types of sharks it's okay to swim around & get close to (aka not Great Whites at feeding time and NOT drunken custy's who are grabby touchy out on the floor...BIG red flag - Caution: Proceed at own risk) , then you GREATLY reduce your chance of getting attacked by one. Tons of people do it every day without getting injured.

sassfire
11-10-2006, 11:14 AM
I think it's kind of like.....*scratches head and thinks of a metaphor* swimming with sharks. Ordinary civillians are like "WTF, are you crazy?! You are just ASKING to get bitten!" But if you have been around sharks before, know their ways, know how they think, know the types of sharks it's okay to swim around & get close to (aka not Great Whites at feeding time and NOT drunken custy's who are grabby touchy out on the floor...BIG red flag - Caution: Proceed at own risk) , then you GREATLY reduce your chance of getting attacked by one. Tons of people do it every day without getting injured.

Huh, you lost me? On a funny note (wasn't funny then). A dancer got a dance from who she thought was going to be a safe japanese business man from japan. This guy look meger too. She left that lap dance hella pissed off,after 5 seconds. That mild man turned into the devil incarnate. No one expected that tiny man to pull some shit. In other words alway expect a guy to touch you.

Anyway, after reading some of the men's post in the other boards even some men don't want a dancer touching them or grabbing at them. I don't blame them. That's is telling them, "I can do whatever I want to you, but if you do the same to me, I'm going to cry foul". If they can't touch, you can't touch. Well they want you to touch, but don't lead them on too much.

Laylas
11-10-2006, 11:27 AM
Okay, let's break it down for ya...

Guys=sharks
you=swimmer with sharks, trained professional, if you will :-*

Dancing for guys at stripclubs is like swimming with sharks. The more knowledge and EXPERIENCE you have, the lesser chance you stand of getting fondled by a guy....just use common sense. If the guy seems overly agressive, dance further away! Or grab his hands and hold them down! If he seems like he'll be able to handle it, go for it! Make some money! Sounds really obvious, but you'd be surprised...I usually only "give inches" to guys I realize understand the premise of a strip club (looky, looky, no touchy).

*shrugs shoulders* does anyone else get what I'm saying? Maybe I watch the Discovery Channel too much (I <3 Shark Week!). Although, I have to admit.... :bong: Hey, I had a REALLY long night, cut me a break! }:D



*Edit* There will always be wolves in sheep's clothing....in life, period. Surprises will happen, asses will be grabbed. Do what you can to MINIMIZE the chances of it happening to you on a regular basis!

xoxoGracexoxo
11-10-2006, 12:14 PM
I agree with Jenny about a certain degree of consent being implicit in the sale of the dance. Initially, customers really may not know what the lines are and when they are crossing them. What continually surprises me -- although I guess it shouldn't -- is the customers who will continue to touch you in ways from which you have specifically asked them to refrain, or will continue to put their hands in places from which you have already removed them. Do these guys care at all that what they're doing makes us angry and uncomfortable and puts our jobs at risk? How can you have so little concern for another human-being? Do they really, literally, think of us as objects without feelings? Do they just not care, as long as they get to touch some boobie?

I usually just dance defensively. In extreme cases, I will verbally ask a customer to stop a behavior. The next time he does is, I will ask him if he is familiar with the legal definition of sexual assault. In the length of my dancing career I have done this twice. Both times, this was the end of the dance.

cosmic-love
11-10-2006, 01:08 PM
Guys should just think about how many other guys just brushed their lips and tongues there before they do that...ew. :-\


for some reason this is somehitng that men in the strip club always froget about!!!

scout, thanks for this post, at least i don't feel weird in thinking it's only happening to me.... that gyus are so brutal sometimes....well lots of time in my case...
CL

Jenny
11-10-2006, 01:11 PM
I agree with Jenny about a certain degree of consent being implicit in the sale of the dance.
Oooh. Someone agreed with me. I'm a little excited.


How can you have so little concern for another human-being? Do they really, literally, think of us as objects without feelings? Do they just not care, as long as they get to touch some boobie?
Oh. My. God. Read the blue side. Ongoing and mostly very boring and circular argument (so you only need to read one or two posts). Nutshell - yes, that is what they think; they further think that this is perfectly acceptable and even positive behaviour. Yes, it is mysterious to me too.

madmaxine
11-10-2006, 01:17 PM
Oooh. Someone agreed with me. I'm a little excited.


Oh. My. God. Read the blue side. Ongoing and mostly very boring and circular argument (so you only need to read one or two posts). Nutshell - yes, that is what they think; they further think that this is perfectly acceptable and even positive behaviour. Yes, it is mysterious to me too.

I usually agree with you Jenny. You're my redheaded Canadian fantasy. I'm going to dress you up as Anne of Green Gables someday and ask you to dance around for me. And I will not touch you!

Re: the blue side- they're meat puppets with wallets. What do I care what they think?

Crow
11-10-2006, 01:48 PM
Re: the blue side- they're meat puppets with wallets. What do I care what they think?



I think I love you.

Bella21
11-10-2006, 01:53 PM
Hehehe, "meat puppets" hehehe. :)

Jenny
11-10-2006, 02:00 PM
I usually agree with you Jenny. You're my redheaded Canadian fantasy. I'm going to dress you up as Anne of Green Gables someday and ask you to dance around for me. And I will not touch you!
And now I'm more than a little excited.

Bridgette
11-10-2006, 03:53 PM
OMG sassfire. How LONG has it been since you danced??? Because you obviously have NO IDEA what the current atmosphere is like ::) Just stop it already. FFS.

AlexxaHex
11-10-2006, 04:15 PM
Guys attempting to finger me is one of my MAJOR complaints about stripping in southern California. It's like, almost commonplace for guys to try and get away with it.
Maybe there is a lot of this 'rapist' mentality going on in this soulless place...or perhaps this is what they are used to now with girls coming here and thinking this is the only way they can make money so they let them get away with it. Guys LOVE to see how much they can get away with. I think it's like some indicator of how much you like them = their self worth.

Well, FUCK THAT. I am so fucking sick of dealing with wandering fingers that sometimes I want to bring one of those cigar cutters with me in my little purse and threaten to chop their fingers off. Of course I wouldn't really do it, but it would sure scare the crap out of them and make them think twice about doing it again. There are so many things I wish were legal, but alas, threatening a strip club customer with serious violence is illegal, even if they try to rape you. *sigh*

It's not really the sexual aspect of it that bothers me either, it's the GERMS in my pussy. Lord only knows where his fingers were. I have enough problems with infections - I don't need some dick-face with unwashed hands trying to invade my EXTREMELY personal space for $35. No thank you!

Oh and you know what's even sicker than that? Sometimes they won't continue to buy dances if you don't let them do what they want! You're having a great dance and his hands will wander down south. You tell him 'no', move his hands away, close your legs, etc - and then when you ask for another dance, they almost always say, 'no' and you know it's because you didn't let them get away with doing dirty shit to you! >:(

xoxoGracexoxo
11-10-2006, 06:23 PM
Oooh. Someone agreed with me. I'm a little excited.

I agree with you often. My fantasy was dressing you up as The Little Mermaid and having you sing the Disney songs while I shower you with money. But to each her own.


Oh. My. God. Read the blue side. Ongoing and mostly very boring and circular argument (so you only need to read one or two posts). Nutshell - yes, that is what they think; they further think that this is perfectly acceptable and even positive behaviour. Yes, it is mysterious to me too.

I have read the blue side, but sometimes I like to forget it exists. Doesn't it kinda make you wish there was a hell?

sassfire
11-10-2006, 07:47 PM
*Edit* There will always be wolves in sheep's clothing....in life, period. Surprises will happen, asses will be grabbed. Do what you can to MINIMIZE the chances of it happening to you on a regular basis!

Exactly! You don't touch, I dance closer. You touch I back off. You violate rule #1 (don't touch), 1 times for some dancers or more for other dancers, I leave. I know I am taking a risk by dancing closer. The custy knows that he is taking the risk by trying to touch. I will always win. I already got your money. The dancer is in control, if the custy even gesture that he may touch, you can leave as well. Sure his dance will be short and sure you won't get tipped, but oh well.

sassfire
11-10-2006, 07:57 PM
OMG sassfire. How LONG has it been since you danced??? Because you obviously have NO IDEA what the current atmosphere is like ::) Just stop it already. FFS.

Current atmosphere? Are you joking, the atmosphere has been the same for years. Guys are going to try to touch. That is a fact. Back off with the distance. If he tries to touch you, END THE DANCE. Don't act like you don't have control in a LD. If he is safe, sure dance closer. Yet the risk always will remain that he will try to touch. The closer you get the risk will increase. If he is not safe, back off. Don't dance even closer and get surprised that he is trying to touch you. In his mind you are giving him a warped notion that he can touch you. Don't whine that he touched you while you are dancing closer and closer to him.

In fact some dancers use distance reward as a way to make tips. They tell the custy... "you tip me (1st), I'll dance closer to you. The more you tip, the closer I get. You try to touch, I back off. You don't get your money back. You want me closer, tip some more. You touch I back off, no refunds." The longer a custy plays the "trying to touch game" the more tips the dancer makes.