View Full Version : My cat, Bibs.
GoldCoastGirl
05-06-2007, 05:44 AM
Oh my gosh.. read the next line after what you quotes Morr... I was joshing! Pretend I was play acting like a three year old. I was totally utterly joshing! ;D
No snakes for me at the moment. I would want a decent sized snake not a small one and the initial out-lay is beyond me for a proper environment for the snake.
I'm thinking of going with Hermit Crabs in the end.
As for that photo I posted, it is the reason why I kept it around for so long. It reminds me of good memories of each of the cats within the photo. Each cat in that photo was a predominate factor in my life.
Taddles grew up with as she came into my life when I was a toddler.
Smokey was my first ever familiar (and only one at present) on this plane of existance. She taught me alot in her last year of life and even in her death. It was thanks to her transition I learnt about grief and came to my beliefs etc about death that it helped me IMMENSELY when it came time to let my mother transition..............and now Bibs.
Bibs. Well, I think we all know the impact she has had on me and my life.
I am feeling better. I still have my sad moments yet I am thankful for what each cat (including Bibs) has brought into my life now. I also know that she is definately much better off now... back to full health and playing with Smokey. Having Smokey wash her as she used to do. Snuggling up with Smokey (and vice versa) etc.
She didn't like Puddy. She would be loving how I'm still loyal to her in death and that she is away from Puddy. :)
I'll be checking the storage shed I've got soon for the photo album with all her photos within it and hopefully be able to share more with everyone.
Start to think of the great memories I had with her.
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 06:59 AM
OMG. I just realised it has been a week.
As soon as I had that realisation I started crying.
Maybe I am not as much over the grief as I thought I would be ... it's been a week.
I miss her. I miss her every damn day. Damnit!!!!!!!!!!!!
:'(
jaizaine
05-09-2007, 07:12 AM
On the 18th of every month I get very upset, he passed away on Dec 18th.
The weird thing is (and I wonder if it will happen to u) u know how u lose track of what date it is sometimes, like u not thinking about it? well each time its been the 18th i havent realised what date it was and yet felt really down and upset that day. I had a sad night at work once and on my way home I thought what date is it? oh yeah the 18th and just burst into tears in my car.
Anyway my point is I know what u mean about feeling a bit shocked that its already been a week. I felt and still feel like that too.
Im glad u r writing out your feelings tho it really does help.
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 07:47 AM
OMG! I'm totally with you there!
I was feeling down for most of today and didn't realise why until I looked up at my calendar and saw that it had been a week! That's when my body let it rip with the crying.
So yes it is happening to me.
I was wondering why I was feeling down when I should be feeling great as I ended up having a really decent night at work on Tuesday night ...
I guess it was very lucky for me to have Wednesdays off then each week.
DylanAngel
05-09-2007, 07:51 AM
It's weird how time passes, but one thing, like a certain date, can bring you right back there again, isn't it?
It's been 4 months since my Backgammon left me, but I have a beautful carved wooden box with his ashes in it, on my entertainment center along with a framed copy of The Rainbow Bridge and his picture.
All I have to do is look up as I'm watching TV and feel him again. But the tears are less now. Pain is still there, but it's more of a wistful "wish you were here" thing now.
Hope you are doing better and that you can get to the point where you can just remember her without it feeling like your chest is going to cave in from grief.
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 08:02 AM
You see that was the thing. I was doing better and then today came and I when I had that realisation it had been a week... bam... it hit me. It hurt.
I'm still v-unsure as to what to do with her ashes. I keep that photo of her with Smokey and Taddles near-by her ashes to remind me that she is "with" Smokey now playing with her etc... and that she is happy... away from Puddy.
Just that, as much as I have tried to allow Puddy into my life as such, he is not Bibs. He is himself and there really are qualities Bibs had that I do so miss that Puddy just can't fulfill as such.
I find that my Teddy Bear is getting alot of use these-days. I tend to like the contact (the feeling) of having the teddy bear next to me just like it felt to have Bibs do the same thing ..... because Puddy just gets ants in his pants as such to stay in the same spot for long periods of time.
DylanAngel
05-09-2007, 08:07 AM
I have two other cats that I loved as much as Backgammon...Mollie and Puddy, lol (but we call him Monkey). But as much as I love them, they weren't really too much of a comfort because they weren't him, so I know where you're coming from.
You're going to feel that way for a long time; I won't lie to you on that one. And it's usually the date markers that get it to rushing all back.
You almost feel like you are starting to be ok, then you realize the date, and a feeling of guilt comes on because you can't believe that your life is settling into a routine without them.
But you know that what you're doing is healthy. Crying is a healthy outlet as is your writing. Keep it up and peace will come.
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 04:44 PM
Well, today was my first visit back to the vet. I had to take Puddy in so they could take a sample of his blood and run some tests in re his diabeties. From now on, my flatmate is going to take Puddy in as I just can't do it.
I was there in the waiting room and did everything I could to not burst out crying then and there as all the memories of me bringing Bibs to the vet came flooding back.
I thought I would be okay enough to do so however I realise there is alot more healing for me to do in re Bibs. Alot. It's going to be quite awhile before I'm ready to move on and it isn't because I don't want to ... I do want to move on.. I so want to move on... just that... the memory is still "fresh" as such.
Damnit. :grouphug: for myself lol
Roulette
05-09-2007, 04:54 PM
:hug: :grouphug: :hug: :grouphug: :hug:
That is always so hard. Hun I am so sorry!! my thoughts are with you!! Anything we can do for you?
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 08:25 PM
^^ Well everyone is already being of assistance to me in my time of healing.
Anyone want to give me a house? :devil: :P Otherwise everyone has been really helpful already. (I asked for a house as then I can move into somewhere I can have a cat, dog, whatever without any consequence as such because I'm going to be a renter for awhile longer whilst I work on saving up for a deposit)
Roulette
05-09-2007, 08:28 PM
hey guuuurl, I got a malibu barbie house with your name all over it ;)
GoldCoastGirl
05-09-2007, 09:28 PM
:laughing: Pink isn't my colour.... Now if it was Blue... :P