View Full Version : The Random Thread
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 09:56 AM
Get a new Dr. Quickly. He isnt listening to you and what you need. Brushing off depression by saying you arent "trying hard enough" is complete BS. We here know how hard you are trying and we arent even pros privy to your confidential conversations with him.
Seriously..your Dr blows and you need a better one. That will actually listen and try to help you instead of giving you pat answers while thinking about his next vacation he'll take with your money.
I want to hold you honey....I wish my arms would stretch to you. :hug:
You are NOT a fuckup. You work harder then almost anyone I know and are so unbelievably mature and responsible and independent that I often forget you are so much younger then me. I WISH I had your willpower and your strength....your motivation and work ethic...your ability to love, and accept love in return. You are a continuing source of inspiration to me. I cant tell you how many times I havent wanted to work because I'm feeling lazy and I think WWLD(What Would Lysondra Do)
And I hope with all my heart you are including my area in your round the country trip in October!! If you are here around Halloween you are invited to my annual Halloween party. We shall get drunk together and sneak away to my bedroom where I will hold you in my arms and we will watch bad scary movies (like Cabin Fever)and laugh together!!
Even if you miss that...come here...you can stay with me and we will do the same. Pajama Party!!!!
I did change doctors, that's how I got the pills. The first one wouldn't give them to me and I was so angry I went to one the next day but was waaaay to ashamed to go back. :/ Sucks.
WWLD? Really? Aww, that paragraph really made me cry. :hug: :hug:
I have to be in Cali October 6th but was planning on 'high-class thumbing' it everywhere else. Having enough money to just hop a plane to whereever I feel next and hopefull steal a SW couch along the way. And then go home when I'm finally done after banking at a few choice strips.
I really think I have the chutzpah to try Vegas now.
britt244
03-24-2008, 09:59 AM
I want a cupcake. I think I shall get one.
mmmm. i wanted subway so i got it. and doritoes. i dont care anymore. im still feeling depressed so im turning to food!
and my apt is all nice and clean bc my cleaning lady just left.
i dont want to go to work tonight but maybe it will make me feel better. i had a lot of bad work dreams last night.
hockeybobby
03-24-2008, 10:00 AM
Yeah, every word of what Cameron said. You are so admired Lys, you have no idea.
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:00 AM
Sorry, I'm having a bad moment...
I just remember things like my mum kicking me out because her fiance of 3 months was better than me... and my husband making me bathe in bleach because I wasn't pretty enough...paying for a third of my own engagement ring... being denied food when I was an American size two because my mother thought I looked too pregnant...
Little things, really.. but I keep reflecting on all the times in my life I was never good enough for people.
And it makes it so when people do/say nice things now, I don't get it... I don't get it because.. what suddenly made me worth it? I wasn't five minutes ago.
britt244
03-24-2008, 10:00 AM
oh and also.. i found out something crazy about my ex and his ex wife. when he thought she was cheating (she was, but hell if he treated her the way he treated me i'm not surprised) he hacked her email and phone so all her emails and texts and stuff got sent to him too.
i'm like a beaten wife. my relationshp with him IS an abusive relationship, just not physically. and i still want him to hug me and make it all better.
hockeybobby
03-24-2008, 10:20 AM
Are you talking to anyone Lys...counselling, psychologist? That might be even more help to you than pills, cuz it seems past events may be very important for sorting out current feelings/thoughts about yourself. Just throwing that out there...I'm certainly not an expert, plus I'm stupid sometimes.:)
pookie
03-24-2008, 10:23 AM
i should clean up before the bf gets home... so it looks like i actually did something today...
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:24 AM
Are you talking to anyone Lys...counselling, psychologist? That might be even more help to you than pills, cuz it seems past events may be very important for sorting out current feelings/thoughts about yourself. Just throwing that out there...I'm certainly not an expert, plus I'm stupid sometimes.:)
I stopped talking to psychologists when I was 15... when three in a row told me my life was so fucked up THEY couldn't bear to hear it and had a 'better specialist' for me.
Oh yeah. Way to add to that whole 'feeling unwanted' bit I mentioned.
That also reminds me... AS I was telling a psychologist nobody listens to me and they always change the subject my psychologist said, "CAN YOU PLEASE FIX THE ARM OF YOUR SWEATER? IT'S BUGGING ME!"... I was like... wow... way to listen and not change the subject!
pookie
03-24-2008, 10:29 AM
uncut is just so much more fun.
more exciting things to do with.
Thats all.
cameron_keys
03-24-2008, 10:30 AM
Lys..you are worth EVERYTHING. You are worth the best life has to give to you...including friends. These people a re NOT your friends...they are useless twatwaffles who should be taken out of the gene pool immediately.
I would never in a million years even THINK of telling my friends they arent worth ANYTHING. They ARE my friends because they are worth the WORLD to me.
Fuck these people...fuck them with a rusty chainsaw and leave them bleeding by the side of the road.
Seriously...cut them out of your life, they are toxic and you dont deserve that shit.
If you ever feel you arent worth anything...PM me or call me(I'll send you my number). I'll set you straight I promise. In fact..give me THEIR numbers so I can set THEM straight(after ripping them a new one)
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:33 AM
99% of the toxic people are out of my life... I'm just reflecting. Not in a good way. :/ I need to learn.
But um.. I'll say it's current if I get Camnumber!
hockeybobby
03-24-2008, 10:34 AM
sorry
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:34 AM
Don't be sorry! :(
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:35 AM
CAMNUMBER!!
I'll call in your afternoon, I'm about to head to bed (335am) here.
kaiarose
03-24-2008, 10:35 AM
Why do people purposely start threads that they KNOW will piss people off and start controversy? Okay once is fine, but to make that your constant thing?? Get a life!
cameron_keys
03-24-2008, 10:36 AM
Can I just say publicly that Lady Jade fucking ROCKS. She sent me the nicest gift today for no reason whatsoever. She is the sweetest person and I LUUUUB her!!!
Mikey35
03-24-2008, 10:40 AM
Sorry, I'm having a bad moment...
I just remember things like my mum kicking me out because her fiance of 3 months was better than me... and my husband making me bathe in bleach because I wasn't pretty enough...paying for a third of my own engagement ring... being denied food when I was an American size two because my mother thought I looked too pregnant...
Little things, really.. but I keep reflecting on all the times in my life I was never good enough for people.
And it makes it so when people do/say nice things now, I don't get it... I don't get it because.. what suddenly made me worth it? I wasn't five minutes ago.
Sometimes when we're hurting, it just doesn't matter what other people say to try and make us feel better. They tell us we're strong and good and wonderful, but it's like we don't believe them. If I'm such a good person, then why do I feel this way? If I'm so strong, then why do I feel so empty on the inside? If I'm so wonderful, then why am I so alone, even if I'm in a room full of people?
The affirmations of others, while nice to hear, won't make us feel any better unless we can believe the things they are telling us are true. Have faith in yourself. Believe that you are a good person. Believe that you deserve to be happy. It doesn't matter if the world around you conspires to bring you down. Believe in yourself. Because in the end, that's all you really need. Believe in who you are and eventually happiness and contentment will follow. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but if you believe in yourself, then you'll realize that those things other people are telling you, really are true.
Lady Jade
03-24-2008, 10:44 AM
Can I just say publicly that Lady Jade fucking ROCKS. She sent me the nicest gift today for no reason whatsoever. She is the sweetest person and I LUUUUB her!!!
I :heartbeat you too, Cam! Sometimes, I just see things when I'm the store and they make me think of someone special to me so I buy it. I figure that while I have the means to make other people feel happy and special, I should!
And Lysondra, you know you can call me any time you want. I promise to say stupid, funny things in my chimpunk voice to make you laugh!
britt244
03-24-2008, 10:44 AM
i should do yoga. maybe i'd perk up. but i'm too blah to care.
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 10:51 AM
I stopped talking to psychologists when I was 15... when three in a row told me my life was so fucked up THEY couldn't bear to hear it and had a 'better specialist' for me.
Oh yeah. Way to add to that whole 'feeling unwanted' bit I mentioned.
That also reminds me... AS I was telling a psychologist nobody listens to me and they always change the subject my psychologist said, "CAN YOU PLEASE FIX THE ARM OF YOUR SWEATER? IT'S BUGGING ME!"... I was like... wow... way to listen and not change the subject!
I've been through so many psychologists/therapists. 95% of them are just walking through it, I swear. I found one now-she's not perfect, but she seems to care. You've got to weed through so many.
I know that not worth it feeling, too. I'm struggling with that now. I'm all unloved and uncared for and stuff-in my head. I think M is your numero uno toxic person. And I htink he does that stuf because he thinks he'll keep you down and so, keep you. That's why everyone does that crap.
I know you can't leave yet, but you will, and they you can do whatever you want. Please don't listen to him though. You rock. A lot.
stellaforstars
03-24-2008, 10:52 AM
UGH. My psychiatrist refuses to see me until I pay my first installment of my freaking $1500 bill at UBH.
I HAVE NO MONEY. Guess this means I won't have meds in 3 days or so either.
Chicagoeditor
03-24-2008, 10:55 AM
Yay. Will be in Houston this weekend. Ribs!
Lysondra
03-24-2008, 10:58 AM
I've been through so many psychologists/therapists. 95% of them are just walking through it, I swear. I found one now-she's not perfect, but she seems to care. You've got to weed through so many.
I know that not worth it feeling, too. I'm struggling with that now. I'm all unloved and uncared for and stuff-in my head. I think M is your numero uno toxic person. And I htink he does that stuf because he thinks he'll keep you down and so, keep you. That's why everyone does that crap.
I know you can't leave yet, but you will, and they you can do whatever you want. Please don't listen to him though. You rock. A lot.
The thing with him is he doesn't even realize he's being a freaking dick sometimes. He doesn't GET why I'd get upset or cry over the things he says/does. He keeps saying it's because he cares or he just wants to help or shit...
today he locked me out of the house because he forgot I was gone.
That kinda didn't help.
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 11:03 AM
The thing with him is he doesn't even realize he's being a freaking dick sometimes. He doesn't GET why I'd get upset or cry over the things he says/does. He keeps saying it's because he cares or he just wants to help or shit...
today he locked me out of the house because he forgot I was gone.
That kinda didn't help.
Well, he does seem to have a lot of problems with the people interactions (You said he has Aspergers, I think?). I don't know-I've met people with probs like that who aren't dicks. And plenty without diagnosed probs who will look you in the eye and tell you that you shouldn't eat, shouldn't take up their time, you do what they say or else.
I can't imagine his 'no you can't spend money' attitude is wholly because he has no clue. And if it is, it doesn't make it right. You are worth any number of digipets! ;D
Joplin
03-24-2008, 11:04 AM
I've started chitchatting with people in my classes. Sounds little, but it's really cool for me. I am SO anti-social (because of anxiety not because I like it that way) so having conversation is really fun for me. I know I'll end up all alone at the end of the semester because I can't keep relationships up, but at least at the moment I have people to talk to before class....yay!!!
britt244
03-24-2008, 11:07 AM
im going to find the scariest movie i can and watch it.
that, or finally watch i know who killed me.
Lady Jade
03-24-2008, 11:09 AM
that, or finally watch i know who killed me.
Lindsay Lohan as a stripper = Scary!
:O
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 11:09 AM
im going to find the scariest movie i can and watch it.
that, or finally watch i know who killed me.
Black Christmas! (The original!) or Poltergiest!
Limabean327
03-24-2008, 11:10 AM
I've started chitchatting with people in my classes. Sounds little, but it's really cool for me. I am SO anti-social (because of anxiety not because I like it that way) so having conversation is really fun for me. I know I'll end up all alone at the end of the semester because I can't keep relationships up, but at least at the moment I have people to talk to before class....yay!!!
It doesn't sound little to me, sounds like a big deal (I have social anxiety disorder). Good job on talking to people!
britt244
03-24-2008, 11:12 AM
Black Christmas! (The original!) or Poltergiest!
the guy in poltergiest i think 3 is the scariest in the world. the tall singing one.. haha.. you know what im talking about.
annnd im going to have nightmares tonight.
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 11:14 AM
the guy in poltergiest i think 3 is the scariest in the world. the tall singing one.. haha.. you know what im talking about.
annnd im going to have nightmares tonight.
OMG! YES! Those movies freak me out!
hockeybobby
03-24-2008, 11:30 AM
This is random...there are some threads, I think to myself I hope Jenny shows up here and takes an interest. And often she does. She has a knack for saying precisely the right thing.
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 11:38 AM
I swear no matter how much I stretch, my back is always stiff and uncomfortable. It feels wrong ALL the time.
Lady Jade
03-24-2008, 12:30 PM
I have got to stop eating this ham. There's so much fat on it that it's just plain gross... but the glaze made everything so yummy that I can't stop. I brought in over a pound to share with everyone at work today, but I ended up eating most of it!
Limabean327
03-24-2008, 12:30 PM
*eats noob's brains* *nom nom nom nom* lol;D jk
This thread moves too quickly, I just caught this! Lol!! Not my braaaainnnss!!!
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 12:33 PM
Gah. Have to have the mom drive me to Target and the grocery so I can finish my Secret Egg shopping. And get some food. I have being dependent.
Lady Jade
03-24-2008, 12:37 PM
Gah. Have to have the mom drive me to Target and the grocery so I can finish my Secret Egg shopping. And get some food. I have being dependent.
If only you were on the other side of the river! I can take backroads that lead over there, but once you have to cross over that damn bridge, it doubles the driving time. :(
britt244
03-24-2008, 12:39 PM
I swear no matter how much I stretch, my back is always stiff and uncomfortable. It feels wrong ALL the time.
me too.
i know who killed me is a strange, strange movie.
my best friend just called me to tell me that the girl who betrayed us a few weeks ago just texted her like nothing was wrong acting all normal. um.. did you think because you went on vacation with your door man boyfriend you said you were moving on from that we forgot youre a two faced bitch? because we didnt.
Callyish
03-24-2008, 12:44 PM
So I made it to Thompson in one piece.... I think... lol.
Im tired... im cranky... I want to be home and my period just started so I have the worse pains in my lower back and an upset stomach from too much redbull and my fucking period *sigh*
For the record... the highways coming to Thompson are the worse. There are times where you feel like your traveling down a back country road.
RoseLeigh
03-24-2008, 12:46 PM
If only you were on the other side of the river! I can take backroads that lead over there, but once you have to cross over that damn bridge, it doubles the driving time. :(
Serioulsy, it's a PITA. I was going to bus it to the mall but it takes over a half hour! I don't NEED a car for 1-2 months though-for summer classes. I mean I need one now ffs, but I've got to pay for/save for some other stuff first. I'll have one by May if I have have to build one from scratch! Freaking Jerz.
Lady Jade
03-24-2008, 12:48 PM
Serioulsy, it's a PITA. I was going to bus it to the mall but it takes over a half hour! I don't NEED a car for 1-2 months though-for summer classes. I mean I need one now ffs, but I've got to pay for/save for some other stuff first. I'll have one by May if I have have to build one from scratch! Freaking Jerz.
If you want to build one or get a cheap POS, let me know. The swapmeet is at the end of next month, I can bring you down there. It's always a fun day.
hockeybobby
03-24-2008, 12:57 PM
So I made it to Thompson in one piece.... I think... lol.
Im tired... im cranky... I want to be home and my period just started so I have the worse pains in my lower back and an upset stomach from too much redbull and my fucking period *sigh*
For the record... the highways coming to Thompson are the worse. There are times where you feel like your traveling down a back country road.
Hey Cally, do you drive everywhere, like right accross the country???
Callyish
03-24-2008, 12:59 PM
Hey Cally, do you drive everywhere, like right accross the country???
Nah I fly usually unless im booked with a girl who drives.
After I get my apt and furnish it and set up my stripper room im gonna get an SUV so I can drive everywhere.
SundayMorning
03-24-2008, 12:59 PM
uncut is just so much more fun.
more exciting things to do with.
Thats all.
The truth don't get much truer than this.
Yay. Will be in Houston this weekend. Ribs!
But, but, but San Antonio has barbacoa. And me. *big eyes*
Lunarobverse
03-24-2008, 01:09 PM
uncut is just so much more fun.
more exciting things to do with.
Thats all.
It's a little late for me to be learning this.
If I'd had the choice I wouldn't have had it cut.
That is all. :'(
Katrine
03-24-2008, 01:13 PM
Yes, uncut is great. It makes handjobs and blowjobs so much easier. And I've never known an uncut guy who was obssessed with making me deep throat him either. My gag reflex is serious, I puke up all the time. Mmmmm.......uncut cock, perhaps I shall have some tonight.
BrunetteGoddess
03-24-2008, 01:16 PM
I like cut, thanks. But more power to ya.
Katrine
03-24-2008, 01:31 PM
I like cut, thanks. But more power to ya.
What is the extent of your experience with either? Don't worry, rhetorical question. Being that I'm a big old slutbag and almost a decade older than you, I have pretty solid empirical evidence for me claims. Now, tell me a sexy story and prove me otherwise!!! :P
mizzou
03-24-2008, 01:34 PM
do you mind if i join in the conversation or rather for me to stay out
cameron_keys
03-24-2008, 01:34 PM
I've had both...it isnt a dealbreaker,but I prefer cut too