View Full Version : Told the parents... didn't go over well... will they get over it?
Dottie Rebel
05-04-2007, 06:55 PM
I thought you said that you hadn't told your dad because you knew he'd have a bad reaction?
Exactly.
If he found out, he would be very upset. In fact, he knew I stripped when I was 18-20 and was absolutely horrified. I've been dancing again (25-26) and haven't felt the need to tell him.
I suppose I could be all up in his face and force him to confront the issue, but I think that would be sort of pointless and adolescent at this point. I'm not going to expose my parents to information that would hurt them or make them frightened for me just because I'm on some crusade to change people's minds about stripping. I'm not.
Does that mean I feel guilty deep inside because I was and am disappointing him and my mom? Absolutely not. If they harbor judgment about what I do that speaks of them, not me. I just feel no need to pick this battle.
Brandy420
05-05-2007, 12:00 PM
I had a cousin who danced before I started so that kinda broke the ice for my family.
My dad was a whole nother story. I had been dancing for about 2 weeks and he showed up at my apartment one day. Well I had shorts on and we all know about the beginner bruises. He thought I was being beaten by my boyfriend. I had no choice but to tell him the truth. He wasn't pleased, but I was grown.
My mom had to see it for herself. So she popped in one night, watched a few girls and myself do our thing. She said it wasn't at all what she thought and that at least I danced with class.
Parents are parents, they'll love you no matter what. Keep your head on straight and it'll all work out!
Windy
05-05-2007, 02:23 PM
Well..let's put it like this: When I was about 19 I joked with my mom that since I have these big boobies that I should go get a job @ Hooter's.
Dude, my mom's eyes welled up so fast..she was like, "oh please don't do that to yourself. OMG what have I done as a mother to deserve that"
I was shocked..so umm yea she has NO IDEA that I'mma dancer lol..
haha.
yeah my mom joked to me once that since i have big boobs i should work at hooters...
but i know that she knew i was a dancer...she would be freaked out. she is so conversative goody goody. haha. she knows nothing about the industry and of course assume im really hooking, not just dancing.
my dad wud be upset. he even told me once in a lecture, "dont ever work in one of those titty bars, ya hear me?"
i agree with jaizaine - i love my parents n they love me no matter what...but i konow telling them would hurt them. they would think somehow they "failed" as a parent or something. and they did a good job raising me(well the best the could) so i dont want them to think any different.
it would be great to come clean but ha, right now is not a good time. becuase me and my little sister(16) hang out alot, shes like my best friend and all...but if my parents knew i was a stripper...then'd probably WOULDNT let her hang out with mne. theyd probably assume ill be having a bunch of sleezy guys around me and make my sister take drugs and encoruage her to dance when she turns 18.
MishaBliss
05-05-2007, 08:20 PM
My parents were horrified at first. They deal with it ok now.
fakesmile101
05-06-2007, 02:38 AM
Oh man... My mom found out right away (by overhearing phone conversations and reading my journal). She freaked out, said I was a disappoinment and that she didn't know why "I needed attention from men who view strippers as second class". I was extremely hurt and felt violated, and moved out two days later after she tried to implement a curfew (I was 22 at the time). She told my dad, who has never brought it up to me, but I know it makes him very sad. I eventually lied and told her that I quit. I never meant for her to find out in the first place. I hate lying, but in some parent scenarios, I really feel that it is sometimes the best option. Anyway, I plan on quitting for real before the end of the year. We currently don't talk about it at all, but to me it feels like the huge hidden discomfort. I feel very guilty about the whole thing, and that I have been a "bad" daughter. It really does upset me a lot to know that they know. My mom will probably never get over it.
So I told my parents that I am stripping, and long story short my dad is totally less than pleased. Anyone else do this, and do the parents ever get over it?
Some of the best advice I ever took in my life was to never tell my parents what I do for a living on account of how conservative they are. NEVER told them....they just eventually put the pieces of my puzzle 2gether on their own...by that time I already had my own apartment. They know now...we just don't ever talk about it. They know that what I'm doing is what it is I want to do and that I am an adult. I don't know if u still live with your parents, that's a whole other ordeal...but eventually things just have a way of working themselves out.;)
ViolaStrings
05-06-2007, 04:53 PM
If your parents love you, they'll get over it if they see you're not being taken advantage of and are making a better life for yourself. Finding out your daughter is a stripper might make some parents feel like failures because a lot of people only think troubled girls with awful pasts and no other means become dancers. To a lot of people, stripping is synonymous with prostitution.
My father is fucking useless. My sister used to be a dancer, too. What's the Chris Rock quote - "they don't grade fathers, but if your daughter is a stripper... YOU FUCKED UP" Even as a young child he was like an unwanted stranger in my life. When he found out, he called me a whore and all sorts of awful stuff I don't want to get into. We no longer speak.
My mother isn't much better. She and my father hate each other but are co-dependent. She has a "back injury" and can't work, but can sit around the house all day popping pain pills then jaunt off to the mall. My father wouldn't know how to wash a sock if you gave him directions. So they hate each other but stay together. She is vaguely curious about it, but I refuse to indulge her curiosity. She asks the most random, newbie-type questions, then will scream at me the next minute for "showing my pussy to the world". UGH.
I never told them. I got caught because my mother's best friend's husband saw me at work! OOPS. I don't know how he narked me out without getting in trouble himself.
ajbaer
05-07-2007, 03:22 PM
My sister was a dancer and when my parents found out they disowned her. It wasn't until she got pregnant with her son that they "allowed" her back in the family.
I decided to dance because that's what I want to do. They have told me they'd do the same if they found out, but that doesn't bother me. They are my parents, yes, but that does not mean I"m going to let them run my life.
I won't tell them, but if they find out so be it.
TheSexKitten
05-07-2007, 03:55 PM
I've already told my dad that I'm gonna start stripping soon.
Know what he said? "As long as you're happy and you're not being exploited, regardless of what your job is, I'm happy."
Now, that, IMO, is a sign of a good parent.
A.n.a.l.a.
05-07-2007, 04:58 PM
:) sounds like a great dad... wish mine were so openminded. don't even dance yet. and being in ohio, if this law passes, i might not be able to do so here at all. but anyways... my mom's pretty much anti- adult entertainment. porn, strippers, even girls gone wild. and since i still live with her, i'd have to be sneaky. and my dad, well i don't want to know... he lives across the country and we aren't all that involved in each other's lives.