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Yekhefah
01-31-2008, 10:52 PM
Another from tonight:

Girl 1: Can I borrow a tampon?
Girl 2: Uh, no. You can just have it. I don't really want it back.

krchab99
01-31-2008, 10:59 PM
^^^haha that made me laugh

miabella
01-31-2008, 11:20 PM
i patronise some chains because most chains started out 'non-corporate local businesses' that people liked to support, such as starbucks and peet's and nordstrom's.

applebee's pours strong drinks, which makes them tolerable in any locale.

ruth's chris is also a chain, as is benihana-- not to mention all the chain stripclubs that aren't too corporate to work at...

Dottie Rebel
02-01-2008, 01:21 AM
"Chili's is the new golf course." --Micheal Scott

Alaska
02-01-2008, 02:26 AM
Another from tonight:

Girl 1: Can I borrow a tampon?
Girl 2: Uh, no. You can just have it. I don't really want it back.

Okay I'm going to be so pissed if I don't remember to say that next time.




applebee's pours strong drinks, which makes them tolerable in any locale.



See I always got annoyed that their idea of a mixed drink....one full gallon of 9 parts sugar-water and other additivers, one teeny bit of alcohol.

But I don't know what the feeling about corporate restaurants, patronizing or working, has to do with the feeling of corporate sc's.

AmazingKat
02-01-2008, 02:35 AM
Girl 1 lets a really wet fart out.

Girl 2 "Was that my cell phone?"

Later:
(we'd been talking about dying driving home in the shit weather)

Girl 2: "I've been totally meaning to dye my hair. Fuck, if I died I'd hate the guy at the morgue to think I actually liked this color."

Even Later:
(trying to share a hotel room with Girl 2)

Girl 2 can't find the light switch located between the two lamps that separate our double beds. She calls the front desk.

Girl 2: "I can't find the light switch in my hotel room."
Front Desk: "Oh, honey don't do this to me."

I reach over and flip it on for her. Not sure why she didn't ask me first.

Theres plenty more to come of Girl 2 once I remember them.

Alaska
02-01-2008, 02:46 AM
Girl 1 lets a really wet fart out.

Girl 2 "Was that my cell phone?"



NEVERRRRR in my life have I been blessed with so many "belly busting" funny fart jokes as here on sw. And this is not even a joke.....classic, beautiful. Props and thumbs up, thank you for sharing. You oughta find a way to stick this in "Ripping Ass in VIP", bc that thread is perfection and all it needs is this.
}:D

Starfire
02-02-2008, 01:02 PM
I know. 2 weeks! And all those stupid videos you had to watch with people in them that look like they are from a bad 80's movie.
I lasted there 8 months, but it seemed like an eternity. At the time, it was really tough to find a job in my town so I did what I had to do. Funny thing, a girl I met there and became good friends with was the one who brought up the idea to dance. We both quit Applebee's and started dancing the next week!

OMG! I used to work at applebees too, and a girl I met while working there got me into dancing. Lol.

kikidejavu
02-04-2008, 12:45 PM
This wasnt over heard from anybody I worked with but rather 2 girls, about 18, that came into the store I worked at doing peepshows. They were looking at the different buckets with lube, thongs, all those lil nick nacks and when they came to the condoms one of them says something like "Wow I can't BELIEVE they sell condoms here!! wow, nobody uses condoms anymore" then says to the clerk "these must never sell, honestly how often do you sell condoms." He just laughed and said "every day actually" to which I said "Yup, nobody likes AIDS".

Now I know why my gynocologist was telling me AIDS rates were going up in teenage and young women...
that just reminded me how much i love condoms... no babies no stds!
Gooooo condoms!!!

LilMissSophie
02-04-2008, 02:09 PM
Gems from girls who were fired:

Girl 1 (was pulled off a customer's dick in VIP): What's wrong? I thought it was a nude lapdance!!
Manager: YOU'RE nude, not him. You're fired.
Girl 1: Fired? I wasn't fucking him! Stick your finger in my pussy--it's TIGHT! If I were fucking him, it'd be all loose!

Girl 2 (was fired for the same thing--she was quietly escorted to the dressing room to collect her things)
Girls in the dressing room: Why are you leaving?
Girl 2: Oh, I was fired for giving someone a bj....
::::uncomfortable silence:::::
Oblivious dancer: Well, hey...at least she's honest! (looks around smiling for approval)
Girl 2: Yeah, well they tried to say I was fucking him, it was just a BJ!!!

blondi553
02-04-2008, 02:20 PM
^omg thats sick!

Sauske
02-04-2008, 08:07 PM
house mom (to dancer) : I like your tattoos
Dancer (to house mom) : thanks! I used to cut myself so now instead every time I want to cut myself I just get a tattoo! that's why i have so many!




me: *slowly backs away*

BalletBaby
02-04-2008, 08:20 PM
Sweet-Faced Tiny Teen Dancer had just finished doing her friend's makeup and wanted to take a picture of it with her camera phone. Friend wasn't turning her head the right way to get the angle that Tiny Teen wanted, so I heard this exchange:

Tiny Teen: "Turn your head that way. No - up. No - Just look at my boobs."
Friend (looking around with a lost expression): "Where? I don't see them! Where are they?"
Tiny Teen: "Oh, fuck you."

:laughing:


Along the same line last night:
Dancer A: Is there a tissue around here somewhere?
Dancer B: Yeah, in your bra :D
A: Shut up

Ok this didn't happen in the dressing room, but it goes along with these two posts.

Friend: "There's another store in that shopping center that sells dancing stuff. They also make bathing suits for girls with big boobs, like me"
Me: "What about for girls with small boobs?"
Friend: "Yeah, they've got your stuff at baby gap"
Me: "You Bitch!"

gingerlee
02-04-2008, 08:37 PM
Random drugged up dancer-'I know you don't live here, so I'll go ahead and introduce myself. I supply all the pills for the girls that work here. I've got a little bit of everything, so what can I hook you up with?'

Me-'Ummm, I'm cool. I don't need anything.'

Dancer-'Well when you decide you need a Lortab or something let me know, because no stripper can make it through a shift without getting fucked up.'

Me-'....'

I hid from that girl the rest of the week.

paintgoddess
02-05-2008, 02:51 AM
Me: Nice... someone dropped a condom.
Cokehead: Oh honey, there's some skanks that work here. They be suckin and fuckin in rooms five and six. Hell, I don't even know what a condom is anymore... I haven't used one in so long. I was with my fiance, you know... for so long.
Me: Yeah.
Cokehead: You know you can catch the same stuff from suckin a dick as you can from fucking them?
Me: Yep.
Cokehead: (picks up condom when she thinks I'm not looking and tosses it in her locker.)

Kaylinn
02-05-2008, 03:04 AM
At the most upscale club in Vegas:
(dressing room, changing to go home)
Dancer: OMG! your in your bare feet!
Me: YEah...
her: ewww. tha is soo disgusting.
Me: Well, that's why I don't eat with my feet. I dont care how dirty they are. They just going in my dirty shoes anyway.
Her: Well, we have a rat that lives back here, and he shits all over the floor. they have disease and stuff.
:O

Corey
02-05-2008, 02:32 PM
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

Well, at least she warned you:)

Me in bikini bar dressing room. I'm changing my bra.

Dancer: (young but w/ stretched out breasts from...whatever)
"Why can't my boyfriend buy me some new titties. I am so self-conscious about my breasts'

Me: (smaller breasts, but firm, perky and not a stretch mark)
"I worked at a topless bar for three years. There were girls of all different shapes and sizes who made money. Don't be so hard on yourself'

Dancer" "YOU worked at a TOPLESS bar?? You're kidding!

Me: (Silently) WTF??:O ::)

Alaska
02-09-2008, 04:22 AM
White girl who is always loud, obnoxious, trying to sound black, always talking about how cute she is (she's not + chunky) talking about her homies in jail, etc.:

(in her jeans) "I got a big ass for a white girl!!!!"

black chick: "Yea, you got a flatty-wide."

She was ...mortified.

Danielle_4370
02-09-2008, 11:24 AM
OMG! I used to work at applebees too, and a girl I met while working there got me into dancing. Lol.
OK, wait a minute. This just might be why we go into stripping. It's not the abuse we suffered as children or lack of self-esteem. It's because we all used to work at some corporate chain restaurant! :spin:

Someone alert Tyra.

Sauske
02-09-2008, 01:19 PM
White girl who is always loud, obnoxious, trying to sound black, always talking about how cute she is (she's not + chunky) talking about her homies in jail, etc.:

(in her jeans) "I got a big ass for a white girl!!!!"

black chick: "Yea, you got a flatty-wide."

She was ...mortified.

hahahahah a Flatty-wide. love it

Alaska
02-09-2008, 01:31 PM
It was so true too. :rotfl: She had a face that went from "all proud" to looking like a 5 year old who had just been told there's no Santa, it seriously crumbled and she tried so hard to hide it but I caught it, haha

CallMeSky
02-09-2008, 02:45 PM
OK, wait a minute. This just might be why we go into stripping. It's not the abuse we suffered as children or lack of self-esteem. It's because we all used to work at some corporate chain restaurant! :spin:

Someone alert Tyra.

Chains here, too. Red Robin for 3 months and McD for 9 months. Also turned a co-worker on to dancing.

cameron_keys
02-09-2008, 04:15 PM
I've only worked for one chain "restaurant"..Roy Rogers the summer after high school. Had to press sexual harassment charges against my manager after he locked me into the walk in freezer with him and tried to grope me. THis after weeks of spurning his advances.

Alaska
02-09-2008, 04:22 PM
I've only worked for one chain "restaurant"..Roy Rogers the summer after high school. Had to press sexual harassment charges against my manager after he locked me into the walk in freezer with him and tried to grope me. THis after weeks of spurning his advances.

What is up with the fucking freezer?!?! 3 times in my years before stripping I was forced/coerced/tried to be groped upon in a goddamn freezer.Twice in Jersey and once here. 2/3 times I was underage and they knew that. Yes there's no cameras, but omfg. Shit on that.

Sophia_Starina
02-09-2008, 04:23 PM
Dancer: Why am I being penis-sliced?!?!?!

Manager: Penalized... not penis-sliced!


:D;D:D

Yekhefah
02-09-2008, 07:16 PM
I've only worked for one chain "restaurant"..Roy Rogers the summer after high school. Had to press sexual harassment charges against my manager after he locked me into the walk in freezer with him and tried to grope me. THis after weeks of spurning his advances.

Perkins Restaurant, age 15, same deal. Manager was the owner's son. When I threatened to sue him for trying to grope me and asking me for sex (given that he was in his forties and I was a child, not even old enough to drive), he harassed me and called me Fat Bertha until I slapped him hard across the face and quit in the middle of a lunch rush.

But stripping is degrading and waitressing isn't. RIGHT.

fantasiarene
02-09-2008, 11:54 PM
i used to work at applebees too. worked there for 2 months. a week after i was laid off since i wasn't 21 (someone under 21 was serving drinks so everyone under 21 was fired) i started dancing. that was 6 years ago. i guess that's what applebees does to us.

i really need to start working again so i can have some dressing room stories.

tasteebars
02-10-2008, 03:33 AM
damn mee too!

I worked at a diner my junior yr in hs and all the waitresses on my shift were my age and then all the cooks were in their 20's. anytime one of us girls would go in one cook would open the door and "push" his friend in there with us and not let us out and the guy would seriously try to put the moves on us like it was a damn *7 minutes in heaven date* i would just yell and eat the pickles, and whatever else i could get that would taste good cold

Laurabell
02-11-2008, 11:55 AM
This happened not to long ago, I was talking to another dancer who I like, but she's not the brightest girl I ever met...

(she's sitting next to me getting ready) what's your tattoo say?
me: its in latin, i translate for her
her: latin huh? so your mexican?
me:wow.

SundayMorning
02-11-2008, 12:44 PM
:rotfl: Hilarious on so many levels!

DanceLunaDance
02-13-2008, 09:27 AM
It was a particularly slow night last night. By 10pm, we had 45 girls. One of my favorite funny girls muttered, "I miss the good old days when I did so many lap dances my ass was constantly broken out in pimples..." I thought it was hilarious!

TigersMilk
02-20-2008, 10:08 AM
Stripper: What is that? *points to my food*
Me: *eating* chicken salad and tabouli
Stripper: Are you a vegetarian?
Me: *pause* no.

SundayMorning
02-20-2008, 10:35 AM
Dancer on her cell phone: No, I said I'm drunk. I'll call you back after I drive home. If I don't call you, I'm in jail.

ellebelle
02-20-2008, 10:53 AM
Drunk Stripper comes into the change room naked without shoes from stage

Sober Stripper: How can you get off stage without your shoes?!

Drunk Stripper disappears, and then returns with shoes

Drunk Stripper: Omg that cop I gave a blow job too just watched me on stage!
Sober Stripper: What, you gave a cop a blowjob?
Drunk Stripper: Yeah well I got arressted and I didn't want to go to jail!
Sober Stripper: What the hell did you get arrested for?
Drunk Stripper: I don't know.. I was drunk. But I didn't want to go to jail! And now he's out there with all his mates and I just know he told them all I sucked him off behind [club name goes here]. They're all laughing at me! When I was on stage!
Sober Stripper: Ah dude.. well you sucked off a cop to get out of a D&D.

Yekhefah
02-20-2008, 12:40 PM
I was a part of this exchange the other night:

Older Eastern-European Stripper: (saying something about resurrection)
Me: (joking along) Eh well, I'm Jewish. I don't believe in all that anyway.
OEES: Jewish? You mean like Hitler?
Me: ...what?
OEES: Wasn't Hitler like part Jewish or something?
Me: Um. Technically, but we don't really claim him since he had six million of us killed.
OEES: Killed? Really? Oh.
Me: :O

Polekitten
02-20-2008, 12:45 PM
I was a part of this exchange the other night:

Older Eastern-European Stripper: (saying something about resurrection)
Me: (joking along) Eh well, I'm Jewish. I don't believe in all that anyway.
OEES: Jewish? You mean like Hitler?
Me: ...what?
OEES: Wasn't Hitler like part Jewish or something?
Me: Um. Technically, but we don't really claim him since he had six million of us killed.
OEES: Killed? Really? Oh.
Me: :O

Wtf?? Has she been living in a cave for the last 50 years?:O

Gypsy74
02-20-2008, 12:48 PM
Wtf?? Has she been living in a cave for the last 50 years?:O

lol, if that was at CD, I know exactly who you are talking about..

Yekhefah
02-20-2008, 12:52 PM
Yup! Needtodance and I were just sitting there in amazement when she left the room!

CollegeCutie21
02-20-2008, 01:38 PM
Monday Night I was at work, explaining to one of the girls about why I had called in Saturday night

Me: So yeah, I guess I've got a pretty bad renal infecton.

Genius chiming in: Eew, so you have an infection in your ass!?!

TigersMilk
02-20-2008, 03:48 PM
I was a part of this exchange the other night:

Older Eastern-European Stripper: (saying something about resurrection)
Me: (joking along) Eh well, I'm Jewish. I don't believe in all that anyway.
OEES: Jewish? You mean like Hitler?
Me: ...what?
OEES: Wasn't Hitler like part Jewish or something?
Me: Um. Technically, but we don't really claim him since he had six million of us killed.
OEES: Killed? Really? Oh.
Me: :O

::)As if the holocaust could ever go unnoticed in history? I would have dropped my mouth in amazement and fear I would catch her stupid. :P

Yekhefah
02-20-2008, 04:19 PM
The thing that baffles me is that clearly she knew who Hitler was, so what exactly did she think he was infamous for?

PleasureVictim
02-20-2008, 04:36 PM
house mom (to dancer) : I like your tattoos
Dancer (to house mom) : thanks! I used to cut myself so now instead every time I want to cut myself I just get a tattoo! that's why i have so many!




me: *slowly backs away*

I don't see whay that is so bad- I have read about many former cutters using tattoos as a way to stop cutting. Either as a replacement or as a reward for going a certain amount of time with hurting themself.

Zinaida
02-20-2008, 04:49 PM
^^ Maybe she was just shocked by the bluntness. ?

britt244
02-20-2008, 10:53 PM
this girl is my friend and i love her dearly.. but.. :O

"my car insurance will NOT go down when i turn 25. that's only for men."

her: when is this president stuff over?
me: ..what part? we dont vote for a new president til nov of next year.
her: no, theyre voting now.
me: nooo, that voting is to decide who runs.
her: huh?
i explain it to her.
her: well last time they did this we had a new president in a few days.
me: you must be confused. we vote for the president in november. next november. it's always november.
her: this is why i don't vote. i wouldn't know what i was voting for!

austinatalie
02-20-2008, 11:36 PM
^ wait, you mean THIS november right, 2008? not next year.

needtodance
02-20-2008, 11:44 PM
Yup! Needtodance and I were just sitting there in amazement when she left the room!


aahahahaha that was hilariously badly shockingly awesomely crazy!

But yeah... Yek and i looked at each other like "WHA?!?!?!"

lol

glad you got it in here. I thought about posting it, but decided i MUST have misunderstood the conversation.

britt244
02-20-2008, 11:51 PM
^ wait, you mean THIS november right, 2008? not next year.

hahaha im retarded! i seriously forget we're in a new year! today i told one of the kids at my day job that the date was 2/20/07. i knew what i meant though :P i probably just confused her even more.. i knew it was this year though, promise! i just forgot we were in this year already. :-[

austinatalie
02-21-2008, 01:48 AM
no prob! I'm constantly writing 07 on things still.

Susan Wayward
02-21-2008, 01:52 AM
glad you got it in here. I thought about posting it, but decided i MUST have misunderstood the conversation.

As another dancer (who worked with her at another club) put it, "She's nuttier than squirrel turds." I have been stunned by some of the things she needed explained to her.

britt244
02-21-2008, 05:47 PM
no prob! I'm constantly writing 07 on things still.

since i'm still embarrassed :-[ haha, here's another gem from the same girl.

another one of our friends got into penn state. they were discussing it.
girl 1: so how far are you going to drive to get there?
girl 2: about an hour and a half. i already drive an hour to class now so it's not that bad.
girl 1: where is it? like, virginia, or something?

PENN state, pumpkin!