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sxybrat07
03-19-2008, 10:56 AM
The nasty girl at our club got a talking to by the manager because she is..well...dirty. Like, doesn't shower for days and was leaving grease on the pole, she was bitching to a friend of mine:

Nasty Girl: Do you think I'm dirty??
Friend: Uh, what?
Nasty Girl: xxx says I'm dirty, and that customers have noticed, and that's just fucking bullshit. Do you think I'm dirty???
Friend: Well, you have been wearing that same outfit for the last 4 days...
Nasty Girl: SO????!!!!!

:O

kikidejavu
03-19-2008, 12:02 PM
if you need to ask am i dirty? then yes bitch you are dirty.

papillonluvr
03-21-2008, 10:49 AM
So this girl was talking to another girl about giving lap dances. Girl A came from texas not to long ago. Girl B has worked here for a while (btw NO TOUCHING allowed in this club, but grinding is ok).
Girl a: Man, I wish the guys here could touch a little bit, at least the hips or ass or something.
Girl b: Why? I wouldnt want any guy's grubby hands on me except for my husbands.
Girl a: Well sometimes it's just like fucking a dead fish, ya' know? It gets discouraging.
Girl b: I don't know what you were doing in texas but we don't fuck our customers around here.
girl B then walks away, leaving a stunned girl a standing in front of the mirror.

we are here to tease, not fully please, as I told a custy not last night.

michele_b
03-21-2008, 02:27 PM
^^ whats really odd is that most painkillers KILL your appetite...or even make you nauseous. I've never heard of anyone who's appetite increased while taking them!

Another thing about that. Baking soda and water cause your stomach to stop being upset, it doesn't make you throw up. My mom used to use that remedy because all of her pain pills and everything would make her sick, so she would mix baking soda and water and it would make her feel better.

Yekhefah
03-21-2008, 02:28 PM
So I want to know if the girl with the crackhead ex really did get those $7000 teeth back? Update!

ixela
03-21-2008, 04:18 PM
One of my favourites from my dancing days:

Girl 1 buys three tequilas, drinks one, and isn't feeling too well afterwards.
Girl 2: "Hey, if you're not going to drink those other two tequilas, I'll have them!"
Girl 1: "No, I'll just leave them for a while. I don't care if they go flat."

fancygirl
03-21-2008, 04:35 PM
^wow, that's a lot of alcohol to buy at once for one girl.

Susan-Va
03-21-2008, 07:29 PM
So I want to know if the girl with the crackhead ex really did get those $7000 teeth back? Update!

That was when I was in Myrtle Beach so i don't know if sh got them or not. She was in the next night (not working) with the custie I was sighting with the night before. He spent good $$ on me telling me that f she was there he'd give her $300 to leave and have sex, he didn't pay me any attention when she was there.

austinatalie
03-22-2008, 12:57 AM
So this girl was talking to another girl about giving lap dances. Girl A came from texas not to long ago. Girl B has worked here for a while (btw NO TOUCHING allowed in this club, but grinding is ok).
Girl a: Man, I wish the guys here could touch a little bit, at least the hips or ass or something.
Girl b: Why? I wouldnt want any guy's grubby hands on me except for my husbands.
Girl a: Well sometimes it's just like fucking a dead fish, ya' know? It gets discouraging.
Girl b: I don't know what you were doing in texas but we don't fuck our customers around here.
girl B then walks away, leaving a stunned girl a standing in front of the mirror.

we are here to tease, not fully please, as I told a custy not last night.

You know, maybe it's just because I'm drunk right now, and a Texan, but I can empathize with Girl A's sentiment. Most guys here will attempt moderate touching, so when a guy totally keeps his hands to himself it leaves me thinking "what's wrong with me? Am I not hot enough for him?" I feel like I am not holding his interest at all, like he doesn't like me. In fact, I may only have one customer all night, if at all, who doesn't touch me one bit. Most will at least place their hands on my back, hair, legs, and/or hips while I dance. I DO get pissed when they try boobie touching. But this is all I'm used to, so the rest of it doesn't bother me one bit.

CherryBomb954
03-22-2008, 04:11 AM
Haha, the other night a girl was talking mad shit about me and didn't realize I was standing right behind her! I am relatively new at the club and have been keeping to myself. She was saying to her friend how I am a nasty bitch with a attitude that thinks I am better than everyone else. You should have seen the look on her friend's face when she realized I was standing right behind! Then the girl that was talking shit turned around and saw me, I just smiled and walked away. Then I heard her saying "I don't care! I'm glad she heard me!"

Then, later on the friend came up to me, apologized and said she hopes I wasn't upset, but alot of people around there think I am a bitch cause I don't talk to anyone! I just keep to myself, I told her. I learned my lesson from talking to too many people at my last club. It caused me alot of drama in the end and I never want to go through what I went through again.

Joplin
03-22-2008, 09:12 AM
Another thing about that. Baking soda and water cause your stomach to stop being upset, it doesn't make you throw up. My mom used to use that remedy because all of her pain pills and everything would make her sick, so she would mix baking soda and water and it would make her feel better.

Kindda a TJ but, Thank you so much for sharing that. I felt sick (felt like I was going to throw up and I literally could BARELY breath because my throat swelled up for some reason) earlier and heated up some water with some backing soda in it and was able to feel good enough to actually go to sleep. I woke up a few times for more of the drink and on the last time I woke up my stomach is feeling much better and I can breath now.

I was seriously about to make an emergency appointment about my throat but it's all better now.

Thank you michele!!!

britt244
03-22-2008, 09:29 AM
my friend: im getting my dog groomed on monday. theyre open even though its easter.
me: easter is sunday.
my friend: no it isnt. go look at the calendar.
me: i swear to god i dont think we can be friends right now. easter is sunday. its always on a sunday.
my friend: noooo, it's a leap year.

i was seriously getting mad at her because she would not listen to me.

michele_b
03-22-2008, 11:47 AM
Kindda a TJ but, Thank you so much for sharing that. I felt sick (felt like I was going to throw up and I literally could BARELY breath because my throat swelled up for some reason) earlier and heated up some water with some backing soda in it and was able to feel good enough to actually go to sleep. I woke up a few times for more of the drink and on the last time I woke up my stomach is feeling much better and I can breath now.

I was seriously about to make an emergency appointment about my throat but it's all better now.

Thank you michele!!!

Aw, you're welcome. I am glad I was able to help with my post :) I hope everything is ok for you.

Yekhefah
03-22-2008, 03:07 PM
my friend: im getting my dog groomed on monday. theyre open even though its easter.
me: easter is sunday.
my friend: no it isnt. go look at the calendar.
me: i swear to god i dont think we can be friends right now. easter is sunday. its always on a sunday.
my friend: noooo, it's a leap year.

i was seriously getting mad at her because she would not listen to me.

"Easter Monday" is a holiday in Canada and it's marked on a lot of calendars in this country. She probably just saw that and got confused.

britt244
03-22-2008, 03:12 PM
"Easter Monday" is a holiday in Canada and it's marked on a lot of calendars in this country. She probably just saw that and got confused.

i tried explaining that to her. i tried to tell her its like friday was good friday. she wasnt getting it.

NewMoon
03-22-2008, 03:13 PM
my friend: im getting my dog groomed on monday. theyre open even though its easter.
me: easter is sunday.
my friend: no it isnt. go look at the calendar.
me: i swear to god i dont think we can be friends right now. easter is sunday. its always on a sunday.
my friend: noooo, it's a leap year.

i was seriously getting mad at her because she would not listen to me.
Isn't there Easter Sunday and Easter Monday?

EDIT: I see I'm Canadian so that's why.........

britt244
03-22-2008, 03:14 PM
easter itself is on a sunday, though. what does being canadian have to do with it? its a religious holiday... im confused now. ive always seen easter monday on calendars here too but easter is still sunday.

NewMoon
03-22-2008, 03:18 PM
easter itself is on a sunday, though. what does being canadian have to do with it? its a religious holiday... im confused now. ive always seen easter monday on calendars here too but easter is still sunday.
Here we consider "real" Easter to be on Monday meaning Good Friday was when Jesus was crucified and then he rose 3 days later.... on Easter Monday.

Sunday is just when people go to church and have their dinners, for my locality anyways. Stores are open, ect.

Wait.... do Americans think Jesus arose 2 days later then??? I'm confuzzled.

veronicavale
03-22-2008, 03:41 PM
I've never heard of Easter Monday!

NewMoon
03-22-2008, 03:43 PM
I've never heard of Easter Monday! What nationality are you?

Miss_McKenna
03-22-2008, 03:52 PM
The UK had Easter Monday too, but the actual day of celebrating has always been the Sunday I think....Monday is just kind of a day off school :-\

Polekitten
03-22-2008, 04:30 PM
The UK had Easter Monday too, but the actual day of celebrating has always been the Sunday I think....Monday is just kind of a day off school :-\

I agree, the day to celebrate is Easter Sunday, Easter Monday is just the bank holiday after Easter Sunday. Not sure what the rules are across the pond but thats the rules here.

austinatalie
03-23-2008, 02:08 AM
I've never heard of easter monday either! I always have school that day.

iambonbon05
03-23-2008, 02:14 AM
I was complaining that my stomach was hurting after eating a bunch of hamburger helper. Conversation turned to other processed foods like ramen and one girl was like "have you ever had ramen like they make it in jail? It's so good. You've got to make it like they make it in jail"

:O

michele_b
03-23-2008, 05:52 AM
I was complaining that my stomach was hurting after eating a bunch of hamburger helper. Conversation turned to other processed foods like ramen and one girl was like "have you ever had ramen like they make it in jail? It's so good. You've got to make it like they make it in jail"

:O

OMG, wtf?! :-X

silverlolita
03-23-2008, 10:15 AM
So last night this fantastic but kinda hood girl I work with was really pissed that her man came in to see her. (apparently in all the years she's been dancing, he'd never done this, and she was suspicious he only did it because he himself was suspicious about her true whereabouts) Well she's back in the dressing room bitching (after sitting on his lap all night of course) about how he was 'fucking up her money' and about how she had to leave now while loudly declaring her plans to not hold back once she got home. "Fuck that shit, I'm leaving his ass" she exclaimed to me as she dramatically tossed things into her bag, strutting around and admiring herself in the mirror. She then looked at me and said "So if you hear on the news one day 'ni**a dead' it was me" and reitereted 'I'm serious if you turn on the news one day and they say 'ni**a dead' girl you know it was me' :D

I choked on my carrots imagining a local anchor (one of which happens to be my custy!) reporting such a story in that manner and assured her I would come testify for her if ever such a thing were to pass.

Joplin
03-23-2008, 01:33 PM
I think Easter Monday must be a regional thing. I've never in my life heard of it, and I've never had school off for it.

My family is roman catholic...they even go to Latin mass...I've seriously never heard of that.

cameron_keys
03-23-2008, 02:29 PM
I find it fascinating that Catholics dont know Easter Monday! We usually had off from school and no mail delivery..and a lot of businesses were closed Easter Monday! I thought it was a universal thing!

kikidejavu
03-23-2008, 02:35 PM
^ i think we dont know about it because easter is on sunday, and we had the whole week off of school not just monday.

Polekitten
03-24-2008, 04:10 AM
I find it fascinating that Catholics dont know Easter Monday! We usually had off from school and no mail delivery..and a lot of businesses were closed Easter Monday! I thought it was a universal thing!


I think its regional thing. I'm a Catholic and we have Easter Monday. In the UK its a bank holiday, all the schools, banks, ect are closed today. Its a pain in the ass tbh for people like me who don't care that much about Easter and want to go to the bank.

ihearthepole
03-27-2008, 10:55 AM
So last night this fantastic but kinda hood girl I work with was really pissed that her man came in to see her. (apparently in all the years she's been dancing, he'd never done this, and she was suspicious he only did it because he himself was suspicious about her true whereabouts) Well she's back in the dressing room bitching (after sitting on his lap all night of course) about how he was 'fucking up her money' and about how she had to leave now while loudly declaring her plans to not hold back once she got home. "Fuck that shit, I'm leaving his ass" she exclaimed to me as she dramatically tossed things into her bag, strutting around and admiring herself in the mirror. She then looked at me and said "So if you hear on the news one day 'ni**a dead' it was me" and reitereted 'I'm serious if you turn on the news one day and they say 'ni**a dead' girl you know it was me' :D

I choked on my carrots imagining a local anchor (one of which happens to be my custy!) reporting such a story in that manner and assured her I would come testify for her if ever such a thing were to pass.

LOL I wish I could've been there to see that one.

peanutbutter007
03-28-2008, 03:32 PM
Dancer A gets to DR after her stage set, her locker was right next to mine and we chatted alot. Background: She was a more mature dancer (in her 40's) and I loved her. She was always talking about her chemical peels and dermabrasion like every other week! And she always did the "spirit finger" thing onstage, wonderfully tragic.

Spirit fingers: "Gee, it's busy out there..I've got a bunch of PD's to do, but need to freshen up a little...will you watch my locker, I'm going to change my tampon?"

Me: "Okay" -- but thinking that was more than I wanted to know.

Spirit fingers returns: "Dammit!"

Me: "What's the matter?"

Spirit Fingers:"Nothing makes me more mad then when you're changing your tampon and it's 'clean'....I hate a wasted tampon."

Me: No comment.

beauty21queen
03-28-2008, 04:57 PM
^^^ Everytime I see your screen name I start singing,"its peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time , peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly ,peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!!!" ;D

mollyzmoon
03-28-2008, 05:12 PM
My favourites are all the things the girls with pimps will say. Why are there so many pimped-out strippers at my club, I don't know.

Par example:


girl 1: "I know my man is cheating on me."
girl 2: "Why's that?"
girl 1: "I saw a couple fifties in his wallet, and those were not my fifties"

et aussi:

girl 1: "So are you gonna be okay with your man?"
girl 2: "No! I got nothing for him, I need to pay some stuff..."
g1: "Well I only gave you that twenty cuz I thought it'd help you out, but if you're gonna be in trouble anyway, give it back to me"
g2: "No! I need it for some stuff...you don't understand"
g1: "No, give it back to me, and I'll keep it in my locker so you'll have it here tomorrow. This way he doesn't take it from you."
g2: "Can I smoke you on this joint instead?"

pimp girl to the manager:

manager: "Hey, why don't you take a night off?"
pg: "Why? For what?"
manager: "Go hang with your friends. See a movie or something."
pg: "I don't have any friends." (unironically delivered)

another time:

pg: "Guess what? I had an abortion today."
me: "Oh? Should you be working?"
pg: "Well I had it this morning."

and finally:

pg: "So my reg tells me he's given me like $3000 this week already, and I'm like yeah? ok? Cuz I never know how much money I make. I don't count it, I just give it away."
me: "You shouldn't give your money away!"
pg: "Oh, haha, I know. I mean, I give it to my man."
me: "..."
me: "So does he invest it for you or...?"
pg: "Oh it's okay, we're gonna buy a house together and stuff."
me: "Right."
pg: "But first we have to pay off his car."

cameron_keys
03-28-2008, 05:17 PM
^^^ Everytime I see your screen name I start singing,"its peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time , peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly ,peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!!!" ;D

AHAHAHAHAHA...I did that too!!! Glad to know I'm not the lone Family Guy freak!

rozz
03-28-2008, 05:27 PM
pg: "So my reg tells me he's given me like $3000 this week already, and I'm like yeah? ok? Cuz I never know how much money I make. I don't count it, I just give it away."
me: "You shouldn't give your money away!"
pg: "Oh, haha, I know. I mean, I give it to my man."
me: "..."
me: "So does he invest it for you or...?"
pg: "Oh it's okay, we're gonna buy a house together and stuff."
me: "Right."
pg: "But first we have to pay off his car."

ARG! This hurts my head. Why?!

beauty21queen
03-28-2008, 05:28 PM
^^ I love Family Guy and The Simpsons and I think I will love them forever.

mollyzmoon
03-28-2008, 05:29 PM
Okay, I have more, I can't help myself:

Random new girl to me (it's something of a self-derived monologue she sprang on me whilst we were smoking in the changeroom):

Her: "Yo, you're cool. Thanks for the cigarette. Hey, is it always this dead in here? Man!...Yeah, so I just moved here. I coulda been on the national Lacrosse team, but then I got pregnant. Yep. My soon is like four feet tall, and he's only three. His baby father is like 6'5"...Yeah, you know what? My doctor? He said it was okay to do blow during pregnancy! Yeah! Better than drinking, smoking, or anything else, because the only thing blow does is maybe cause early birth or low-birth weight, whatever. I was crying and freaking out, cuz I didn't even know I was pregnant for like four months, and I'd been partying like crazy, doing E and drinking and stuff. But he said if I had to do something, blow was okay"

me: "huh"

her: "so do you do lines?"

me: "no."

her: "..."

me: "..."

her: "Sure is dead tonight"

beauty21queen
03-28-2008, 05:31 PM
^^^LOL why did that make me laugh so hard!

Andygirl
03-28-2008, 05:36 PM
Dancer A gets to DR after her stage set, her locker was right next to mine and we chatted alot. Background: She was a more mature dancer (in her 40's) and I loved her. She was always talking about her chemical peels and dermabrasion like every other week! And she always did the "spirit finger" thing onstage, wonderfully tragic.

Spirit fingers: "Gee, it's busy out there..I've got a bunch of PD's to do, but need to freshen up a little...will you watch my locker, I'm going to change my tampon?"

Me: "Okay" -- but thinking that was more than I wanted to know.

Spirit fingers returns: "Dammit!"

Me: "What's the matter?"

Spirit Fingers:"Nothing makes me more mad then when you're changing your tampon and it's 'clean'....I hate a wasted tampon."

Me: No comment.


Lol, or "Damn, I've been sitting here waiting so long to go up that I have to change my tampon. I hate it when they make me waste tampons!"

This woman was always talking about her "wasted" tampons. She'd say this stuff and PB and I would always laugh because we never understood the concept. Wouldn't she have had to use the tampon regardless? She never could get her head around it, but it was funny as hell!

Aprilleigh
03-28-2008, 06:56 PM
Okay, I have more, I can't help myself:

Random new girl to me (it's something of a self-derived monologue she sprang on me whilst we were smoking in the changeroom):

Her: "Yo, you're cool. Thanks for the cigarette. Hey, is it always this dead in here? Man!...Yeah, so I just moved here. I coulda been on the national Lacrosse team, but then I got pregnant. Yep. My soon is like four feet tall, and he's only three. His baby father is like 6'5"...Yeah, you know what? My doctor? He said it was okay to do blow during pregnancy! Yeah! Better than drinking, smoking, or anything else, because the only thing blow does is maybe cause early birth or low-birth weight, whatever. I was crying and freaking out, cuz I didn't even know I was pregnant for like four months, and I'd been partying like crazy, doing E and drinking and stuff. But he said if I had to do something, blow was okay"

me: "huh"

her: "so do you do lines?"

me: "no."

her: "..."

me: "..."

her: "Sure is dead tonight"


man! i can't help but laugh at random conversations like that.:P

Miss_McKenna
03-29-2008, 10:32 AM
^^^ LOL, I love it!!!! Minus the drugs, I have a friend that starts those kinds of conversations with me all the time! Sometimes I think its just talking for the sake of opening her mouth ::) ;D

Yekhefah
03-29-2008, 10:54 AM
Ahhh, cokeheads. :D

AudreyLeigh
03-29-2008, 11:09 AM
her: "so do you do lines?"

me: "no."

her: "..."

me: "..."

her: "Sure is dead tonight"

This made me lol - I can just picture it... ahhahahah

mkl49
03-29-2008, 12:41 PM
This has to be some of the funniest shit I have read in a while. I came across this site while trying to research entertainment in south FL and though I haven’t really found what I was looking for yet, I have spent the past hour cracking up at some of this stuff… epically this thread.

noelle
03-29-2008, 01:48 PM
Omg, mollyzmoon, that made me laugh so hard...

Heidi Hills
03-29-2008, 09:39 PM
My newest most favorite activity is reading this thread. LoL. I sit here and read them out loud to my bf and we laugh till we fall over.

winterrose
03-30-2008, 11:26 AM
last night we had a new girl start...we are a topless only club, she gets her butt on satelite stage and has no bottoms on.
I get drafted by management to inform her, put them back on. So being the bitch I am walk over and ask her where her g's are? She says they broke. I tell her okay, somebody will give you a pair or you can go buy a pair from management.....she says why? showing this isn't like flashing my tits....less demeaning to show pussy than the boobs......huh! Later on I hear her in the dressing room crying to anyone that will listen that I was mean to her....
another girl remarks to her that I have mellowed a lot, that she should be glad I didn't shove her into a locker and put a lock on it and walk away....then tells her that if she can't keep her g's on she was going to superglue them to her skanky ass.

Susan Wayward
03-30-2008, 11:52 AM
I like that, buck naked on stage in a topless bar and wondering why you're telling her to put bottoms on.

Molly, you have such an ear for dialogue!

Joplin
03-30-2008, 12:21 PM
Dancer A gets to DR after her stage set, her locker was right next to mine and we chatted alot. Background: She was a more mature dancer (in her 40's) and I loved her. She was always talking about her chemical peels and dermabrasion like every other week! And she always did the "spirit finger" thing onstage, wonderfully tragic.

Spirit fingers: "Gee, it's busy out there..I've got a bunch of PD's to do, but need to freshen up a little...will you watch my locker, I'm going to change my tampon?"

Me: "Okay" -- but thinking that was more than I wanted to know.

Spirit fingers returns: "Dammit!"

Me: "What's the matter?"

Spirit Fingers:"Nothing makes me more mad then when you're changing your tampon and it's 'clean'....I hate a wasted tampon."

Me: No comment.

I get pissed when I pull out a clean tampon! ahah

I would totally have that conversation. I'm pretty sure I have actually, just not at the club. :-[