View Full Version : Overheard in the Dressing Room
britt244
10-07-2007, 04:09 PM
She's been ordered to either do two days in jail or do volunteer work.
"I ain't volunteering cause they tell me to, fuck if I volunteer for something it'll be because I fuckin want to. I'm just gonna go spend a weekend in the jail, they got hot water and flush toilets and I'll, like, fast. It'll be a little detox vacation. You couldn't pay me to feed those fucking lazy people." (in reference to the food bank/soup kitchen).
...huh?
michele_b
10-07-2007, 09:29 PM
Man, I have read some funny stories on here, I can think of 2 that make this but they aren't as funny as some I have read.
First story, me and another dancer were sitting on the floor by the mirror getting ready, this other dancer comes in and starts talking about her period and being on it at work and blah blah, well the house mom left for a minute and she takes her chair, grabs some baby wipes, sits down and takes out her tampon right there, cleans herself and puts in another tampon, me and the other dancer were both grossed out were like wtf /:O was she too lazy to go to the bathroom or something, just nasty, we warned everyone about the chair.
Other story, I was working at a club with some coked out obnoxious girls and I was just sitting there getting ready minding my business, these girls were talking about all kinds of crazy shit, I can't remember but they thought it was funny. Coked out dancer says you bitches need to shut up cause you got me laughing so hard i'm gonna spit my teeth out :O The girl that said said that couldn't have been older than 25 and she was a decent looking girl, just she must have done so many drugs.
Long-n-leggy
10-08-2007, 02:48 PM
At the beginning of a shift...
"Oh good, here's my money from last night (she had left it in her makeup bag).... oh, gross, it's still all crusty...."
I've never wanted to bother to figure out why her money was crusty. Yikes.
Yekhefah
10-08-2007, 02:48 PM
^^^ Maybe from spilled makeup, since it was in her makeup bag? I know the inside of my makeup bag can get pretty funky.
maximvsv
10-09-2007, 01:25 AM
still all crusty?
fancygirl
11-13-2007, 03:44 AM
I.Breathe.In: Your cartoon made my night. I laughed so hard. I need to get that on my myspace or something.
PrettyCurlieQ
11-13-2007, 03:54 AM
Overheard in VIP, not DR. But this way hot girl was telling her customer that her labia hang ridiculously low. She has a HOT body and she's really pretty. We work in a topless club, not nude, and idk how this came up. But for the next hour I couldn't think of anything but the hottest girl in my club discussing her flabby labia with a customer ::)
fancygirl
11-13-2007, 04:22 AM
*singing softly* "whe---en your clit hangs low...."
Alaska
11-13-2007, 05:54 PM
Girl #1: My man is pissing me OFF lately!
Girl #2: Girl, I feel you. I been havin some crazy ass luck myself. Ha. The other nite, I was talking to this guy, from here, and he had an Australian accent.
#1: oooooooooo! yea girl.
#2: so then I go home with him--and he's not Australian any more!
#1: That's so crazy!! Men are so stupid!! (turning to me) have you ever gone home with someone from here?
me: You crazy?
dawnr1101
11-13-2007, 09:17 PM
Girl #1: My man is pissing me OFF lately!
Girl #2: Girl, I feel you. I been havin some crazy ass luck myself. Ha. The other nite, I was talking to this guy, from here, and he had an Australian accent.
#1: oooooooooo! yea girl.
#2: so then I go home with him--and he's not Australian any more!
#1: That's so crazy!! Men are so stupid!! (turning to me) have you ever gone home with someone from here?
me: You crazy?
I'm sorry....were you at a bar or the club working???? Is she stupid???? I would NEVER go home with a customer WTF?
AlexxaHex
11-13-2007, 10:34 PM
A one-sided phone convo I heard while getting ready last week:
"...So, I'm butt naked, leaning over puking into the harbor and he comes up behind me, grabs my hair and starts fucking me doggy style!....I know, right?....he said he thought an orgasm would make me feel better. But you know what? IT TOTALLY DID! It actually worked."
PrettyCurlieQ
11-13-2007, 10:37 PM
A one-sided phone convo I heard while getting ready last week:
"...So, I'm butt naked, leaning over puking into the harbor and he comes up behind me, grabs my hair and starts fucking me doggy style!....I know, right?....he said he thought an orgasm would make me feel better. But you know what? IT TOTALLY DID! It actually worked."
omfg :boggled: :shrug:
Well, I go with it. They usually like to hear that you go to school or have a straight job, so I'm a schoolteacher. I only strip in the summer so I can take a break and have fun. I teach third grade at a Christian private school on the Westside, so I have to come all the way out here to City of Industry so I won't get caught. *giggle* I can't believe it, but they eat that shit up. ::)
I totally want to use a story like that sometime!
LilMissSophie
11-14-2007, 03:01 AM
I was working with a girl on dayshift today who was talking to one of her customers--she then proceeded to sift around in her underwear, grabbed a napkin from the bar, wiped her asscrack with said napkin, looked at it ... then she SNIFFED it. My mouth dropped to the floor as I watched in horror. She just giggled and kept talking to her customer. He still ended up doing an hour room with her! :O WTF
Alaska
11-14-2007, 03:14 AM
I'm sorry....were you at a bar or the club working???? Is she stupid???? I would NEVER go home with a customer WTF?
Unfortunately, it was like double cringe--I knew exactly who she was talking about! He was this dorky guy who was trying to maintain talking in some weird mix of scottish, Irish, ghetto England accent---I immediately called him on it (oh yr soooo cute) and though he maintained it for a lil longer, he wound up getting several dances because I was so Jersey Fresh and "clever".::) This guy was reallllll serious about trickin some hoe's. Unfortunately, he did! (she described him to the other girl and it was same nite that's how I knew!) Freakin ludicrous!
Alaska
11-14-2007, 03:16 AM
I was working with a girl on dayshift today who was talking to one of her customers--she then proceeded to sift around in her underwear, grabbed a napkin from the bar, wiped her asscrack with said napkin, looked at it ... then she SNIFFED it. My mouth dropped to the floor as I watched in horror. She just giggled and kept talking to her customer. He still ended up doing an hour room with her! :O WTF
oh JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ!:crazy: :crazy: :crazy:
Passenger
11-14-2007, 08:12 AM
^^^Egads!!!!! Sounds like her mommy didn't go over proper potty time procedures. Who does something like that??? I can honestly say that I have NEVER felt the urge to take a whiff of my own ass....ever......:O :yuck: And in front of somebody else....at work no less!!!!
Danielle_4370
11-21-2007, 12:05 AM
^^^Oh, come on! We all go on and on about the importance of hygiene, and what do we do when we find someone who takes an above-average interest in it?
Righteously mock her! OMFG!
What I want to know is: what was going through the customer's mind that made him say: "OK, well, that's not so bad. I'll get my dances from her!"
LilMissSophie
11-21-2007, 02:21 AM
She is the dirtiest girl I've EVER met :crazy:
Passenger
11-21-2007, 07:38 AM
:D Oh my holy craptasticness.....above-average interest? Yeah, I'll say that is above-average interest, unhinged is what that chick is....oh jeebus, I can't quit laughing about that one.
holiday
11-21-2007, 11:20 AM
Dancer A: (laughing) I just spit vodka and some went in my eye! That stings like a bitch!
Me: As bad as getting cum in the eye?
Dancer A: Not that bad, but nothing hurts worse than getting coke(caine) in the eye. That hurts so bad. But it'll get you high as hell. Do you want to try it?
bellasera
11-21-2007, 11:23 AM
Dancer A: (laughing) I just spit vodka and some went in my eye! That stings like a bitch!
Me: As bad as getting cum in the eye?
Dancer A: Not that bad, but nothing hurts worse than getting coke(caine) in the eye. That hurts so bad. But it'll get you high as hell. Do you want to try it?
Ahhaha thats great! :rotfl:
Crow2
11-21-2007, 02:34 PM
Speaking of coke - I walked into the bathroom to do my girly business, pushed the door open and some bitch was snorting lines off the toilet seat. EW! She had the brass ones to look up at me and go.. " want some?"
Gag.
Alaska
11-21-2007, 05:19 PM
what is with the toilet seat business???? there's toilet lids, toilet paper holders....hands, wtf.
So tonight this girl was going on and on about how she got this new dog and she has to beat the shit out of it every day to make it respect her and blah blah blah beating the shit out of the dog, which her boyfriend would be doing for her, but he's in jail for beating her. THEN she starts bitching that her babies daddy, who has full custody, won't let her have the kids anymore just because her boyfriend beats her sometimes ("god, what does he think that just cause johnny hits me when we fight he's gonna hurt little kids?!") and she drives drunk a lot and lost her licence and drives around with no license now.
And everyone in the dressing room is agreeing with her! Like, yeah, can't imagine why he wouldn't want the kids riding around with you driving drunk and beating the dog while your boyfriend beats you!
Then she goes on to say that he's playing head games with her because he told her that the kids miss her and wish she'd call. So she told him if the kids mentioned her he should call so they can talk to her, but he said she was so inconsistant that he didn't want to do that to them. Makes sense to me, but she's like, "well I get up and I come to work and I don't think about my kids while I'm at work cause I'm thinking about working and getting drunk, and then they're asleep. How hard would it be for him to pick up the phone and call me if the kids miss me?"
She goes on to say that she's going to court soon to try to get custody of them.
And STILL, everyone's like, "ooh girl, that judge's gonna set him straight, everyone knows strippers are the best moms cause we work when our kids are asleep an we make lots of money."
cameron_keys
11-22-2007, 09:44 AM
^^ You work with Britney Spears???
Chick in the dressing room on the phone yesterday
"I was NOT cheating on you..I was just fucking him when you walked in"
???? Ok...obviously it isnt an open relationship if he's accusing her of cheating so what the hell DOES she consider cheating???
PrettyCurlieQ
11-22-2007, 05:15 PM
^^ You work with Britney Spears???...
:rotfl:
Alaska
11-22-2007, 05:16 PM
Yea really Lena, that was on some Other shit!
gypsy_girlchild
11-22-2007, 05:58 PM
"Oh, bleaching your hair blonde isn't premanent it will just wash out."
PrettyCurlieQ
11-22-2007, 07:47 PM
"I think my boyfriend might be pimping me. How do you know for sure?"
I couldn't even listen to the rest of the convo, I HAD to walk out before I said something really mean.
ColetteCalahan
11-22-2007, 08:19 PM
^^^ uhh.. she had to ask??? wow.
i finally have one...
so i'm eating a protein bar in the corner.... and i hear, "e_ _ _ _, what are you eating??"
"a protein bar."
"isn't protein the stuff that makes you fat????"
another dancer chimes in, "No, SODIUM makes you fat!"
i threw my hands up and didn't even bother. ::)
blondhottie
11-22-2007, 09:15 PM
Haha, these are great!
On my first day at a new club, one dancer says to her friend about me, "Where'd she come from?"
Geez, at least wait until I leave the dressing room to start talking about me! :P
britt244
11-22-2007, 11:18 PM
"I was NOT cheating on you..I was just fucking him when you walked in"
bahahahahahahahah :D that is most definately a sig quote!
Taylorlila
11-23-2007, 08:04 AM
see my message below, I meant to quote but I didn't.
Taylorlila
11-23-2007, 08:05 AM
So tonight this girl was going on and on about how she got this new dog and she has to beat the shit out of it every day to make it respect her and blah blah blah beating the shit out of the dog, which her boyfriend would be doing for her, but he's in jail for beating her. THEN she starts bitching that her babies daddy, who has full custody, won't let her have the kids anymore just because her boyfriend beats her sometimes ("god, what does he think that just cause johnny hits me when we fight he's gonna hurt little kids?!") and she drives drunk a lot and lost her licence and drives around with no license now.
And everyone in the dressing room is agreeing with her! Like, yeah, can't imagine why he wouldn't want the kids riding around with you driving drunk and beating the dog while your boyfriend beats you!
Then she goes on to say that he's playing head games with her because he told her that the kids miss her and wish she'd call. So she told him if the kids mentioned her he should call so they can talk to her, but he said she was so inconsistant that he didn't want to do that to them. Makes sense to me, but she's like, "well I get up and I come to work and I don't think about my kids while I'm at work cause I'm thinking about working and getting drunk, and then they're asleep. How hard would it be for him to pick up the phone and call me if the kids miss me?"
She goes on to say that she's going to court soon to try to get custody of them.
And STILL, everyone's like, "ooh girl, that judge's gonna set him straight, everyone knows strippers are the best moms cause we work when our kids are asleep an we make lots of money."
geeze. thats where all the bad stripper stereotypes come from.
LexxusLovely
11-23-2007, 08:27 AM
As I was walking by the dressing room to the little girl's room, I heard this gem:
Stripper: "And that wasn't the first time I lost my panties while bull-riding."
;D oh yeah siggy time
StrawberrySwitchblade
11-23-2007, 03:27 PM
I've been quoted! ;D
AudreyLeigh
11-23-2007, 03:41 PM
So tonight this girl was going on and on about how she got this new dog and she has to beat the shit out of it every day to make it respect her and blah blah blah beating the shit out of the dog, which her boyfriend would be doing for her, but he's in jail for beating her. THEN she starts bitching that her babies daddy, who has full custody, [snip!]
And STILL, everyone's like, "ooh girl, that judge's gonna set him straight, everyone knows strippers are the best moms cause we work when our kids are asleep an we make lots of money."
Wow. I can totally see this conversation going on at my old club. :banghead:
Yekhefah
12-02-2007, 12:51 AM
I have two from tonight. Gotta love the ghetto clubs for this sort of thing!
Obese Stripper: Girl, you wearing panties?
REALLY Obese Stripper: Naw, girl, that's why you smell my pussy all the way over there.
Obese Stripper: Well put your damn thong on, bitch, we gettin' flies up in here.
(And there actually were a couple of flies in the room.)
My other favorite from tonight...
Ugly Stripper (on the phone): "Goodbye, Jason. GOODBYE. You're a fucking asshole and I'm not talking to you no more. GOODBYE. GOODBYE. GOODBYE. I'm hanging up. GOODBYE. GOODBYE. (soft pleading voice)... Whaaat?"
Optimist
12-02-2007, 01:00 AM
[quote=Yekhefah;1309366]I have two from tonight. Gotta love the ghetto clubs for this sort of thing!
Obese Stripper: Girl, you wearing panties?
REALLY Obese Stripper: Naw, girl, that's why you smell my pussy all the way over there.
Obese Stripper: Well put your damn thong on, bitch, we gettin' flies up in here.
(And there actually were a couple of flies in the room.)
[quote]
:rotfl:
hearts
12-04-2007, 04:03 AM
End of the night:
"ooooooh shit. I'm gonna go home, get high, and play with my kitten!"
and she did mean her pet kitten.:D
CallMeSky
12-04-2007, 04:09 AM
screaming into the phone . . .
"Boy, get ahold of so-and-so, I make a killer and wanna get me some drugs tonight!"
Lysondra
12-04-2007, 04:10 AM
That reminds me! "Do you think the judge will notice I was smoking a blunt in my red-light photo when I contest running the light?" ...and she held up a picture of herself holding a big fat one with two fingers with a surprised look on her face.
Naaah he won't notice one bit.
AlexxaHex
12-04-2007, 02:39 PM
LMAO!!!^^^
SarahSynn
12-04-2007, 02:47 PM
That reminds me! "Do you think the judge will notice I was smoking a blunt in my red-light photo when I contest running the light?" ...and she held up a picture of herself holding a big fat one with two fingers with a surprised look on her face.
Naaah he won't notice one bit.
OMFG! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!
fancygirl
12-09-2007, 06:37 PM
End of the night:
"ooooooh shit. I'm gonna go home, get high, and play with my kitten!"
and she did mean her pet kitten.:D
wait! I thought we all did this when we went home? :O
StrawberrySwitchblade
12-09-2007, 06:44 PM
"I could have torn off your pants and eaten your pussy so fast you wouldn't have time to moan!"
That was a new one. She then wrestled the dancer she directed that to to the floor.
"I had to come to work. Bitches, please, it is too cold out there to be ho'ing."
fantasiarene
12-13-2007, 01:38 AM
oh my god these have been some of the most hilarious stories i've heard! I'm really needing to be in bed but had to add this one. I'm sitting in the DR with a couple of girls when one of our older dancers pipes up "I think someone's out to get me. The police keep pulling me over for no reason at all! I haven't done anything wrong!". One of the other girls in the room says "Well it might be because you have plastic sheeting over your back window." The poor older dancer had a busted out rear window that she had covered up with that stuff you lay down when you paint.
Andygirl
12-13-2007, 04:48 AM
Dumb chick after being told she better stay off the road after drinking, "Oh, it's ok I drink about 18 of these (Bailey's and coffee) a day and drive. Bailey's doesn't have any alcohol in it."
Uh, ok, just make sure you leave before me, lol.