View Full Version : Overheard in the Dressing Room
TheTempest
01-05-2008, 02:25 PM
Let's get this thread started again!! I miss it.
Last Night:
Girl 1: Sometimes I get a yeast infection so bad that I stick a tampon up there for work.
Girl 2: Girl, are you stupid? A vagina is a self-cleaning organ... you can't plug that shit up!
Not five seconds later.
Girl 2: Aw shit, I got my period! And I was gonna get some tonight.
Me: Well, can't you still have sex with your period?
Girl 2: I fuck black d*ck. That shit is like this -indicates her entire forearm-
Me: Aw damn... you must be like "OK stop, that's my stomach you're poking"
Yekhefah
01-15-2008, 02:37 PM
Sweet-Faced Tiny Teen Dancer had just finished doing her friend's makeup and wanted to take a picture of it with her camera phone. Friend wasn't turning her head the right way to get the angle that Tiny Teen wanted, so I heard this exchange:
Tiny Teen: "Turn your head that way. No - up. No - Just look at my boobs."
Friend (looking around with a lost expression): "Where? I don't see them! Where are they?"
Tiny Teen: "Oh, fuck you."
:laughing:
AudreyLeigh
01-15-2008, 03:13 PM
[LEFT]
Sweet-Faced Tiny Teen Dancer had just finished doing her friend's makeup and wanted to take a picture of it with her camera phone. Friend wasn't turning her head the right way to get the angle that Tiny Teen wanted, so I heard this exchange:
Tiny Teen: "Turn your head that way. No - up. No - Just look at my boobs."
Friend (looking around with a lost expression): "Where? I don't see them! Where are they?"
Tiny Teen: "Oh, fuck you."
:laughing:
awww... thats funny and cute!
Bones7599
01-15-2008, 08:13 PM
Where has this poor woman been hanging out? I hope I didn't run into her during my clubbing trips! LOL:-X
shane333
01-16-2008, 01:19 PM
After we had just had a meeting about professionalism in the club and trying to turn it into a "classy" joint, our GM says to one of the girls after she made a joke about him punching her in the kidneys accidentally:
If I was going to punch you in the kidney, I'd do it from the inside.
/:O
iambonbon05
01-16-2008, 01:57 PM
Sweet-Faced Tiny Teen Dancer had just finished doing her friend's makeup and wanted to take a picture of it with her camera phone. Friend wasn't turning her head the right way to get the angle that Tiny Teen wanted, so I heard this exchange:
Tiny Teen: "Turn your head that way. No - up. No - Just look at my boobs."
Friend (looking around with a lost expression): "Where? I don't see them! Where are they?"
Tiny Teen: "Oh, fuck you."
:laughing:
Along the same line last night:
Dancer A: Is there a tissue around here somewhere?
Dancer B: Yeah, in your bra :D
A: Shut up
Alaska
01-16-2008, 03:16 PM
After we had just had a meeting about professionalism in the club and trying to turn it into a "classy" joint, our GM says to one of the girls after she made a joke about him punching her in the kidneys accidentally:
If I was going to punch you in the kidney, I'd do it from the inside.
/:O
Actually, the kidneys are quite easily accessible from the back! I had a bf give me a massage once, then all of a sudden start squishing something and say "see that? that's yr kidney!" it def felt strange.....also this girl I know got beat up real bad. She had bruises all over her stomach and back, and then her pee started turning bright orange so she went to the doctor, and it was bc they hurt her kidney so much.
AudreyLeigh
01-16-2008, 04:00 PM
^^^ Yea, when I was a domme the first lesson I was taught was not to flog/hit people on their lower back to avoid the kidneys.
AlexxaHex
01-17-2008, 09:26 AM
You were a Domme? That's hot.
StrawberrySwitchblade
01-17-2008, 09:53 AM
I wish I could be a pro-domme. But my area is not conductive to it.
Yekhefah
01-25-2008, 07:51 PM
Last night two girls were shouting at each other and one said:
"Bitch, you better KEEP MY NAME out yo' DICK-SUCKIN' MOUTH!"
:laughing:
AudreyLeigh
01-25-2008, 08:03 PM
You were a Domme? That's hot.
Yea. Google my name ;D But not a pro-domme >:( I work for websites. Have 4 shoots coming up next week.
AlexxaHex
01-26-2008, 10:55 PM
Yea. Google my name ;D But not a pro-domme >:( I work for websites. Have 4 shoots coming up next week.
You look great in a strap-on. }:D
RoseWhite
01-26-2008, 11:22 PM
Last night two girls were shouting at each other and one said:
"Bitch, you better KEEP MY NAME out yo' DICK-SUCKIN' MOUTH!"
:laughing:
Yek, you MUST remember that one for future dialogue. That's a keeper right there.
Pretty_Penny
01-27-2008, 12:35 AM
Last night two girls were shouting at each other and one said:
"Bitch, you better KEEP MY NAME out yo' DICK-SUCKIN' MOUTH!"
:laughing:
i am SO holding onto that one for the right moment.
StrawberrySwitchblade
01-27-2008, 04:20 PM
Last night two girls were shouting at each other and one said:
"Bitch, you better KEEP MY NAME out yo' DICK-SUCKIN' MOUTH!"
:laughing:
I love it!
TheTempest
01-27-2008, 04:24 PM
Here's one from the other night.
Girl 1: You can't find meth in New Jersey anymore. It's sad.
Girl 2: Sure you can!! You just gotta go to them gays. They got the shit!
Dottie Rebel
01-27-2008, 05:47 PM
Hahahahahahahaha. LOLZ.
I had a dream last night in which I was really drunk and some chick was talking hella major trash to me and the dicksucking phrase came into my head like a lightbulb and I was so proud of myself and proceeded to yell
"Get yo dick-sucking mouth off of my name!!"
What? I was drunk.
RoseWhite
01-27-2008, 05:52 PM
^^ Awesome!
Who'd have thought this thread could also, besides being entertaining, become a valuable resource!
sun child
01-27-2008, 05:56 PM
"All we have to do is show them we're not racist!" - white girl when about eight black men came into the club with tons of cash
I know, I was horrified, too.
gypsy_girlchild
01-27-2008, 05:56 PM
Owner: If I find out that any dancer is over charging the customers, YOU will be fired. If you fuck with me, I willl FUCK you!
Dancer: Well, at least at the end of the night we'll get fucked.
sun child
01-27-2008, 05:57 PM
^^ Awesome!
Who'd have thought this thread could also, besides being entertaining, become a valuable resource!
lol so true RW! you're hilarious!
Zyzzx
01-29-2008, 01:05 AM
The best one I heard once was a girl saying, "Ya know ,Im taking a shit here whichcracks me up because after I shit, I have 5 minutes to stage. No one has a clue that I just shat"
Something to that effect. And its true, funny and gross all at the same time.
lol
I was working a job where one of my co-workers came out of the bathroom with with a satisfied look to say "Aah, there's nothing like taking a dump on company time!" Not a stripper dressing room story, but I thought it kinda fit well with what you said.
Zinaida
01-29-2008, 01:30 AM
A pathological liar at work who's currently lying about (amongst many many other things) going to a psychologist that's giving her meds for her 'depression' said: "He put me on morphine."
fancygirl
01-29-2008, 01:43 AM
Saturday night, came in halfway through a conversation when a dancer talking about a custy:
Her: He wants to take me to a movie so I can learn Spanish!
Me: -arched eyebrow- a movie's going to teach you Spanish?
Her: No! (then gave me a look like "duh, this customer's an idiot.")
CherryBomb954
01-29-2008, 11:02 PM
Two girls I don't know:
Girl 1: "I had a great week, let's treat ourselves and go to Applebee's! (with a "oh my god how indulgent" look on her face)
Girl 2: "Applebee's??! Girl, your crazy. I mean I had a good week too, but not that good. I don't have Applebee's money, now that's a luxury"
I swear on my life there was no sarcasm going on from either part. It was real.
Yeah.
beauty21queen
01-29-2008, 11:15 PM
LOL Thats like when they get all overly exited about olive garden
CherryBomb954
01-29-2008, 11:22 PM
LOL Thats like when they get all overly exited about olive garden
I mean damn maybe I am being a snob but come on, Applebee's? A luxury? A cheap, stinky chain restaurant with discusting food and kids running around and screaming at the top of thier lungs?
I always considered Ruth's Chris or Benihana a luxury.
beauty21queen
01-29-2008, 11:26 PM
yeah me too .I hate Applebees or Chili's Ill go if I cant spend much or something but the food is nothing to brag about its like going to Mc Donalds for me.
Yekhefah
01-29-2008, 11:34 PM
I avoid chain restaurants like the plague, except for a trip to Outback Steakhouse about once a year. But Applebee's is the worst of the worst. From the EXCELLENT film King of California...
Michael Douglas (pointing at Applebee's): You know why people eat here?
Evan Rachel Wood: No.
Michael Douglas: Fear. Fear of the unknown. That's the only reason.
Zinaida
01-29-2008, 11:36 PM
LOL Thats like when they get all overly exited about olive garden
...Guilty... Their breadsticks are delish!! :D
Yekhefah
01-29-2008, 11:38 PM
Oh yeah, and this one from tonight...
Wasted Stripper (doing the bent-over vag check in the mirror): Do you ever notice that when you lose weight, and your ass gets smaller, your asshole looks a lot bigger?
Me: Uh, no. I haven't noticed that.
Wasted Stripper (nodding emphatically): It does. It really does. Because my rectum looks so much bigger, and ain't no other reason. I am NOT doing any of that buttsex stuff. No, I think it's because my ass looks smaller, my ass HOLE looks bigger. Does that make sense?
Me: Uh huh. (ducks out the door)
Alaska
01-29-2008, 11:40 PM
^oh my freaking god
lolagetz
01-29-2008, 11:42 PM
Oh yeah, and this one from tonight...
Wasted Stripper (doing the bent-over vag check in the mirror): Do you ever notice that when you lose weight, and your ass gets smaller, your asshole looks a lot bigger?
Me: Uh, no. I haven't noticed that.
Wasted Stripper (nodding emphatically): It does. It really does. Because my rectum looks so much bigger, and ain't no other reason. I am NOT doing any of that buttsex stuff. No, I think it's because my ass looks smaller, my ass HOLE looks bigger. Does that make sense?
Me: Uh huh. (ducks out the door)
Wait, wasted stripper and vag check? Wtf.. A nude club with alcohol? Is that legal up there, Yek?
beauty21queen
01-29-2008, 11:44 PM
^^^BYOB
Yekhefah
01-29-2008, 11:48 PM
Yep, it's legal. Most of the clubs in Portland are fully nude with full bars.
paintgoddess
01-29-2008, 11:52 PM
:-[ <---- This is me, newly ashamed at my love for Applebees.
I heard this one a couple of months ago:
Stripper crying on phone: "Baby, just tell me it's okay to have a couple of drinks tonight......I know. I just really need to get fucked up....It's not like I'm going to keep it or anything.....(more crying, sniffling).... just tell me it's okay because you don't want it either... i just can't believe this is happening to me again...this is the third fucking time."
Alaska
01-29-2008, 11:58 PM
^Jeeez man.
Oh I feel you on the Applebee's.......in this cow town (lol not really but sometimes) You cannot go out to eat on any day past 9pm, 'cept chain places sometimes are open till 10-11. I started eating fish last year, and have to say, I'm pretty satisfied with a piece of grilled fish marinated with herbs and whatnot, side of veggies, etc. Healthy, open "late", cheap, good......I'd do it again!
AlexxaHex
01-30-2008, 12:08 AM
I love those southwestern eggroll things at Chilis. And the portabello mushroom raviolis at Olive Garden. OMG I'm such white trash. :laughing:
Yekhefah
01-30-2008, 12:25 AM
Hey man, the Olive Garden All You Can Eat Soup & Salad for $4.95 special got me through college! I ate the holy hell out of some minestrone. It's still all right when my family drags me there, I'm just lucky enough to live in towns where there are plenty of non-corporate local businesses I'd rather patronize.
beauty21queen
01-30-2008, 12:43 AM
Really one of the things I hate the most about Olive Garden is there service every single time I go they always mess something up .
Alaska
01-30-2008, 01:14 AM
I love those southwestern eggroll things at Chilis. And the portabello mushroom raviolis at Olive Garden. OMG I'm such white trash. :laughing:
Haha my fave too.
But seriously....the past 3 times I've gone, it's a corporate restaurant, yes, but the corporateness is just so glaringly obvious.....the whole "proper intro" by the waiter, the "suggest 2 appetizers/entrees/desserts/crappy crap sugar drinks specifically". The last time we went, the GM came over with a copy of our receipt all xtremely cheerful about how we've been specially selected (only one out of 30 gets it! hey now!) to call up the 800 # to tell them about our experiences and receive a %10 off coupon. That shit took like 5 minutes to explain. I just told him our waitress was good.
CherryBomb954
01-30-2008, 11:48 AM
I love those southwestern eggroll things at Chilis. And the portabello mushroom raviolis at Olive Garden. OMG I'm such white trash. :laughing:
Yeah those eggroll things are pretty good!
I must confess to you ladies that my hate for Applebee's, well alot of it probaly stems from the fact that I used to work there, and it was the most horrific 8 months of my life. If I died tomorrow and went to hell, I swear it would be Applebee's, and I'd be in the weeds with kids throwing macaroni and cheese at my face, people emptying out the salt and pepper shakers on the table just to be assholes, and wearing that nasty polo shirt and brown pleated-pocket pants for the rest of my life. Oh and working a 12 hour day to make 150$. I can't pass by one without wanting to shoot it. So my opinion on that place is a little "biast" if you would. Hehe.
Taylorlila
01-30-2008, 11:51 AM
Yeah those eggroll things are pretty good!
I must confess to you ladies that my hate for Applebee's, well alot of it probaly stems from the fact that I used to work there, and it was the most horrific 8 months of my life. If I died tomorrow and went to hell, I swear it would be Applebee's, and I'd be in the weeds with kids throwing macaroni and cheese at my face, people emptying out the salt and pepper shakers on the table just to be assholes, and wearing that nasty polo shirt and brown pleated-pocket pants for the rest of my life. Oh and working a 12 hour day to make 150$. I can't pass by one without wanting to shoot it. So my opinion on that place is a little "biast" if you would. Hehe.
lmao. Hell is Applebees. i worked there too but didnt last that long. It amazes me how bad the service is whenever I go to Applebees...because I remember the 2 weeks of intensive training. But it still sucks everytime.
CherryBomb954
01-30-2008, 12:16 PM
lmao. Hell is Applebees. i worked there too but didnt last that long. It amazes me how bad the service is whenever I go to Applebees...because I remember the 2 weeks of intensive training. But it still sucks everytime.
I know. 2 weeks! And all those stupid videos you had to watch with people in them that look like they are from a bad 80's movie.
I lasted there 8 months, but it seemed like an eternity. At the time, it was really tough to find a job in my town so I did what I had to do. Funny thing, a girl I met there and became good friends with was the one who brought up the idea to dance. We both quit Applebee's and started dancing the next week!
GoddessofNC
01-30-2008, 12:22 PM
Thats some insane shit!
Hahahahahahahaha. LOLZ.
I had a dream last night in which I was really drunk and some chick was talking hella major trash to me and the dicksucking phrase came into my head like a lightbulb and I was so proud of myself and proceeded to yell
"Get yo dick-sucking mouth off of my name!!"
What? I was drunk.
This is the first time in this thread I've laughed so hard I cried!!
sun child
01-31-2008, 05:47 AM
Oh lord, Applebee's. Reminds me of my teenage stint at Chili's. Lord. I was a hostess. I tried my best, but no matter how hard I tried at my teenage job I was always sexually harassed, bullied into working twelve hour shifts and paid minimum wage. My feet used to ache from that shit. Those suburban restaurant chains really do become alternate fucking universes after a few hours in them. I remember the train that circled my "work station" and how it made me feel. Thinking about this right now makes me grateful for strip clubs.
Those places are greasy, corporate and disgusting.
britt244
01-31-2008, 09:51 AM
hey, i like olive garden! and i looove outback!
Polekitten
01-31-2008, 10:00 AM
:-[ <---- This is me, newly ashamed at my love for Applebees.
I heard this one a couple of months ago:
Stripper crying on phone: "Baby, just tell me it's okay to have a couple of drinks tonight......I know. I just really need to get fucked up....It's not like I'm going to keep it or anything.....(more crying, sniffling).... just tell me it's okay because you don't want it either... i just can't believe this is happening to me again...this is the third fucking time."
This is really sad.