Log in

View Full Version : Ask Cameron Keys



Pages : 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 10:29 AM
I don't know what you *should* call it, but I don't think you should use "Stump the Stripper". Anybody who wants to be an asshole will send you trivia and/or retarded made-up, ridiculous questions just to waste your time.

Good point.

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 10:37 AM
Also...who would I adress my queary to? The main editor?

Kaylinn
09-09-2007, 10:39 AM
I don't know what you *should* call it, but I don't think you should use "Stump the Stripper". Anybody who wants to be an asshole will send you trivia and/or retarded made-up, ridiculous questions just to waste your time.


Plus...you know social stigma that all strippers are just girls who were to dumb for college or a "real job"

I think you'd get to much shit trying to be a stripper advice columnist....

What's your real first name? I'd just go with that. Or make one up. Dear Abby's real name was Ethel I think.....


Dear Princess Consuela Bananahammock,

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 10:48 AM
Plus...you know social stigma that all strippers are just girls who were to dumb for college or a "real job"

I think you'd get to much shit trying to be a stripper advice columnist....

What's your real first name? I'd just go with that. Or make one up. Dear Abby's real name was Ethel I think.....


Dear Princess Consuela Bananahammock,

Well..I only thought of stripper stuff because 1) I thought it would generate interest...like some girl nobody knows wont attrat readers...but a stripper might and 2) I thought maybe I'd be able to prove some of those strippers are dumb nay-sayers wrong!!

My real name is boring...but i like Princess Consuela...lol

Budai
09-09-2007, 10:49 AM
Any thoughts on what I should call my column?

1) "Here's The Keys"

2) "Wise, Wicked 'N' Witty"

3) "Uncommon Sense"

RoseLeigh
09-09-2007, 10:55 AM
Plus...you know social stigma that all strippers are just girls who were to dumb for college or a "real job"

I think you'd get to much shit trying to be a stripper advice columnist....

Plus I think a LOT of the questions would resemble Custie Convo-Does the stripper like me? Why don't you all do $10 laps? How can I get OTC?

It might work for a niche market magazine, but I think you would get the sort of questions you'd like.

Farrah_Holiday
09-09-2007, 11:31 AM
FH, try "Getting Things Done," a very popular and smart book on organizational principles that I still sometimes re-read (my paperback copy looks like a a worn family bible).

Hope I haven't thread-jacked this CK's terrific and insightful advice column.

Okay, I'll read that book.

Lola Rose
09-09-2007, 11:43 AM
I have two....

one) My boyfriend and I have a VERY active sex life. But right now I'm sick, so we hadn't had sex since wednesday afternoon.
On friday night, he masterbated, while watching a porn clip online. I'm in no way against porn, but I don't want it to be a part of our relationship. He had a porn addiction in his past relationship, and I had prevously made it clear that I wasn't ok with it beginning again. I think that sort of thing is DEFINATLY an unhealthy thing for a relationship, and he does too.

We are very open with eachother, and we communicate about everything. So when he told me, I wanted him to know I'm not mad or disappointed with him, and I don't want him to feel like it's forbidden. but I did want him to know it upset me, and that I felt it was a bad idea.

I took a few minutes to think, then I told him I thought it was unhealthy, and that I enjoy our sex life being only between him and I. I said it makes me a jealous, to hear about you watching/thinking about somebody else. I also said that I am very glad that he felt safe telling me, and told him I'm not mad or disappointed, but I'd really rather he have called me, and seen me.

I said I love having sex with you, and there is nothing that could make me not want to be with you, including illness. Then we made love, and he told me that having sex with me is so much better then anything else, and he loves me, loves making love to me, and could never before have imagined anything being this special and amazing. ..... and that he will stay away from it from now on, and he understands my perspective....

then I appologized, b/c I believe it's a woman's responsibility to take care of her mans needs about things like that. (please don't flame this, anyone, I know it's a "outdated" pov, but it's mine.)

I sort of feel like I should follow up it. like, mention it again, thank him for being sensitive to my needs, make sure he knows it is a big deal.....

I'm really not 100% over it, but I don't know how to venture into that topic, or what......

or maybe I should just get it out of my head?? how?

2) we're moving in together next friday, and I've never before met his mother. she's local, but she's refused to meet me. He's divorsed, but not all of the $$ biz is out of the way. She say's he's still married, and that he's being adulturous in seeing me.

It really hurts my feelings, and although I've talked about the situation to him and various friends, it still bothers me.

she and her son already have a pretty stained up past, but I feel that this is fucking up their future, and mine as well.

I think that I will always have this be a blemish on our relationship (mine and his mothers), and I really think that it sucks, because I believe and feel that Rob and I have a LONG future ahead of us, and I think it's very likely that we'll someday be married and have children. in fact, we think about it quite often, and have some clear things lined up....

rob and I have discussed the situation, and he knows I won't be disrespected by her. She has a history of verbal, backhanded abuse, and I won't tollerate it. we decided that the first time I meet her, she can come over to dinner at our house (with her husband and 20 yr old daughter as well). But if she in any way treats me (or him) poorly, she'll need to leave. I'm thinking we'll have her over around the last week of the month, or the begining of october. I doubt she'd refuse..... as long as we do decide to invite her.....

on one hand, I know I need to assert myself, and that it'd be best to do in my terf. On the other hand, she has great potential to be my future mother in law and grandmother to my children, and I don't want to cause unnecessary drama.,...... and I sort of feel like planning to kick her out if she can't behave politely is rude and disrespectful.....

and I really hate feeling ignored and felling shameful, which is how i feel when I think about the situation....

what should I do?

thanks cam.

mdiver
09-09-2007, 12:38 PM
Dear Cameron,

Months ago I went on a trip out of the country for 11 days. While on the trip I had sex with two women per day on average. There were a couple times later on in the trip when on the second or third woman of the day I was not able to have an orgasm (I was able to get it up, just no orgasm), this was over a seven to eight hours time window. I did have a some drinks but I was not drunk and also got a solid six to seven hours sleep every night. On my next trip, I would like to do two maybee three women per day for two weeks and be able to cum like a male porn star every time. Are there any drugs or supplements available or anything I can do to increase my performance?

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 01:20 PM
I have two....

one) I'm really not 100% over it, but I don't know how to venture into that topic, or what......

or maybe I should just get it out of my head?? how?

2) on one hand, I know I need to assert myself, and that it'd be best to do in my terf. On the other hand, she has great potential to be my future mother in law and grandmother to my children, and I don't want to cause unnecessary drama.,...... and I sort of feel like planning to kick her out if she can't behave politely is rude and disrespectful.....

and I really hate feeling ignored and felling shameful, which is how i feel when I think about the situation....

what should I do?

thanks cam.


1) You've said your piece, he's said his(and agreed with you) and you made up. Why would you want to re-visit the argument? As long as he respects your wishes that should be that. I realize thats easier said then done because it hurt you deeply...but you need to let it go. The question is...do you trust him to keep his word? If you do...then it is done. Move on. If you dont...then there are bigger issues at stake and possibly some cpls counseling or individual counseling(for your trust issues and his porn addiction) is a good idea.

2) You ABSOLUTELY have the right to demand respect. And the right to not have anyone in your home who disrepects you. She's going to have to come to terms with the fact that you are with her son whether she likes it or not. And Rob is going to have to make it CRYSTAL clear to her that HE will not tolerate her disrespecting you. If she thinks her son may be even a tiny bit on her side in this..she'll keep going until she "saves" him.

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 01:22 PM
Are there any drugs or supplements available or anything I can do to increase my performance?

I've heard that arsenic works well on troll erections.

cameron_keys
09-09-2007, 01:23 PM
3) "Uncommon Sense"

Hmmm...I like that one. Catchy!

I've also gtten "The Diva Decides" or " The Diva's Decision"


but I think "Uncommon Sense" is my fav so far!!

Lola Rose
09-09-2007, 01:52 PM
1) You've said your piece, he's said his(and agreed with you) and you made up. Why would you want to re-visit the argument? As long as he respects your wishes that should be that. I realize thats easier said then done because it hurt you deeply...but you need to let it go. The question is...do you trust him to keep his word? If you do...then it is done. Move on. If you dont...then there are bigger issues at stake and possibly some cpls counseling or individual counseling(for your trust issues and his porn addiction) is a good idea.

2) You ABSOLUTELY have the right to demand respect. And the right to not have anyone in your home who disrepects you. She's going to have to come to terms with the fact that you are with her son whether she likes it or not. And Rob is going to have to make it CRYSTAL clear to her that HE will not tolerate her disrespecting you. If she thinks her son may be even a tiny bit on her side in this..she'll keep going until she "saves" him.

1. I do trust him. funny, b/c once it's put to that, it's EASY to let go. 8)

2. ok. I'm going to make 100% sure that rob's cool with him being the majority enforcer on that, but that's an amazing idea.... I think it'd mean so much more coming from him, rather then me being like "please leave".

I <3 you (if possible!) so much more now!!!!

thank you!

Yekhefah
09-09-2007, 02:07 PM
Months ago I went on a trip out of the country for 11 days. While on the trip I had sex with two women per day on average.

I want to know where you went and how I can get there.

Lola Rose
09-09-2007, 02:24 PM
I want to know where you went and how I can get there.

I wanna know how much it cost. ::)

Yekhefah
09-09-2007, 02:29 PM
Thai hookers much?

Hope they were adults.

StuartL
09-10-2007, 06:44 AM
^^^ Probably Ibiza or Faliraki - in the 'wrong' or 'right' parts of the island, depending upon your viewpoint, it is all that goes on. Almost all is alcohol fuelled. Not a pretty sight all told.

Otherwise, thanks CK for your thoughts, many many posts ago.

Best wishes

Stuart

Djoser
09-10-2007, 09:20 AM
Wow, Cameron, look at you go, lol!

See it was a good idea...

Thanks for your advice way back when you first got started (LOL).

And yes, I would love to draw your picture, especially if I could use a photograph like that one you used to have as your avatar a while back, with the wings--that was a beautiful picture!

And the good karma or whatever you provided seems to have worked--I was hanging out with one of the friendlier (and more attractive) dancers in the booth last night, and she has a ton of pictures on MySpace page, some of which would make great drawings, so I think I am on my way.

Thanks again, and keep up the good work!

cameron_keys
09-10-2007, 09:36 AM
And yes, I would love to draw your picture, especially if I could use a photograph like that one you used to have as your avatar a while back, with the wings--that was a beautiful picture!


This pic? Feel free!

Lola Rose
09-10-2007, 04:36 PM
somebody post a ?

I meed to read more advice!

Hello_Kitty27
09-10-2007, 06:26 PM
Dear Cameron,

I have always wanted tattoos but have always been a complete pussy about it, not to mention the fact that I'm incredibly indecisive and would never in a million years be able to settle on what to get.

About three years ago, I began to study Japanese and wanted to possibly get something meaningful in Japanese somewhere. I haven't been able to keep up with the studies, but the language and culture still means a lot to me and I'd like to get three Kanji on the back of my neck. I want them to be small (i.e. not the calligraphy-style, probably more like newsprint / freehand style so that it's easier to make them small and the lines won't bleed together).

I finally thought of what would be meaningful to me.....but that still doesn't mean that I won't change my mind or that I won't freak out from the thought of the needle. (I'm afraid of needles....can't watch scenes in movies involving needles or anything). The spot that I want done is the back of my neck, very near my hairline. (not on the bone of my spine....to the sides)

My questions are .....if I've always been iffy about tattoos and I'm now 27 and still somewhat iffy and/or scared, is it stupid to go through it? What I want is meaningful to me now....who knows if that could change, or if I'd care later. My other question is .... do you know if that is one of the more painful places to have tattood? I've heard the fleshier, the better, so that makes me nervous.

cameron_keys
09-10-2007, 06:42 PM
Dear Cameron,

I have always wanted tattoos but have always been a complete pussy about it, not to mention the fact that I'm incredibly indecisive and would never in a million years be able to settle on what to get.

About three years ago, I began to study Japanese and wanted to possibly get something meaningful in Japanese somewhere. I haven't been able to keep up with the studies, but the language and culture still means a lot to me and I'd like to get three Kanji on the back of my neck. I want them to be small (i.e. not the calligraphy-style, probably more like newsprint / freehand style so that it's easier to make them small and the lines won't bleed together).

I finally thought of what would be meaningful to me.....but that still doesn't mean that I won't change my mind or that I won't freak out from the thought of the needle. (I'm afraid of needles....can't watch scenes in movies involving needles or anything). The spot that I want done is the back of my neck, very near my hairline. (not on the bone of my spine....to the sides)

My questions are .....if I've always been iffy about tattoos and I'm now 27 and still somewhat iffy and/or scared, is it stupid to go through it? What I want is meaningful to me now....who knows if that could change, or if I'd care later. My other question is .... do you know if that is one of the more painful places to have tattood? I've heard the fleshier, the better, so that makes me nervous.

Well..I dont have any tattoos myself..but I have heard that the fleshier the area the less painful it is.

It sounds like you are REALLY unsure of this though...so I wouldnt recommend it. I've been told it is much more painful and expensive to laser them off should you get tired of them then it is to get them done n the first place.

Why not try henna tats? They last a few weeks....get them done where you want them and when they fade get them redone. If after a month or two you decide that you dont want them enough to bother having it redone anymore..then getting a real one prob isnt the best choice. If however, you see that you love it and look forward to having them be bold again when they start fading...then you will prob not regret the real thing!

Hello_Kitty27
09-10-2007, 06:48 PM
That is a really good idea about the henna tattoos.....I never really thought about it. I guess I kinda thought of it as an all or nothing thing. I REALLY want what I've thought about, b/c it's meaningful to me, and no one would really have to know and even if people saw, I'd never have to tell them what it meant. BUT I also know how indecisive I am and even though I want it NOW (and have for a few months), I know myself and I know that I change my mind at the blink of an eye. I like the henna idea though.
Thanks!

big_daddy
09-10-2007, 07:57 PM
Sorry it's long....

Dear Cameron,
I analyze everything, everything has to mean something to me. When something changes, I have to look for the reason. It's driving me NUTS! My wife and I are in a strange place that I can't stand I don't know how to put it but by giving examples... "
This is an email she sent me....
I'm sorry if this comes out totally bitchy, but I'm tired and just had a very stressful night. The reason I am going out with my friends is because I now have friends. I understand that you feel left out, but I have NEVER had friends since I've been married to you. These people have my back like no other friends I've ever had. I adore each one of them. Yes, we get mad at one another and tif now and then, but that's part of it. I want time to go out and have fun. I want to enjoy this as long as it lasts because as soon as we go supercenter we're all gonna be split up and go our own direction. I also think we need time apart. You need to form bonds with your friends too. We've been dependant on each other for everything for so long, it's like we lost our individuality. I like to do things that you don't like to do, and vice versa. I want to do things in life, who knows when life will end. I don't want to miss out on experiences that I have dreamed of because it's not interesting to you. (I Big_Daddy is deathly afraid of flying!!) I've been doing a lot of thinking lately as you probably have noticed, and I'm tired of not knowing who I am. I never had the time to experience the things most people take for granted. As far as spending time with you, we have a trip planned every weekend this month but 1, I spent all day sunday riding with you. I do want to spend time with you. I'm just at a point where I need some space to figure things out. I need to come to terms with my parents issues. I need to come to terms with my brothers issues, and I need to figure out my own issues. I'm tired of being insecure. I'm tired of not loving myself. I want to learn how to make relationships and have friends. I hope you understand all this. It's not that I don't care about you anymore. It's that I'm trying to care about more than just you. I'm sorry that I sleep when you're home. I just can't do it all. I'm too lazy. I would love to have the energy to vacuum everyday and dust and do everything that needs to be done. But I dont. When we're not at work we're running, when we're not running we're relaxing. The situation with your mom is upsetting me too. Add in the fact that I don't trust your siblings as far as I could throw them and it really angers me. I guess I'll just stop there before I get really pissed off. Just know that I'm just trying to improve myself. I want to be able to think independently. I want to know who I am and where I'm going. I'm tired of living in a dark place. Just please understand. I'm sorry if what I'm going through is hard for you, but in order for us to be better together, I think we need to take care of ourselves first. I love you.

I guess I just can't step back and let it run its course. I feel I need to know why why why why !! How do I stop it!!! And I don't understand how she want's me to bond with my friends when all they do is drink and ride their Harleys. They drink way too much for me to hang out with them all the time and I don't drink and drive and she wont let me have a bike!!! Help me please!!!

cameron_keys
09-10-2007, 08:09 PM
Sorry it's long....

Dear Cameron,
I analyze everything, everything has to mean something to me. When something changes, I have to look for the reason. It's driving me NUTS! My wife and I are in a strange place that I can't stand I don't know how to put it but by giving examples... "
This is an email she sent me....
I'm sorry if this comes out totally bitchy, but I'm tired and just had a very stressful night. The reason I am going out with my friends is because I now have friends. I understand that you feel left out, but I have NEVER had friends since I've been married to you. These people have my back like no other friends I've ever had. I adore each one of them. Yes, we get mad at one another and tif now and then, but that's part of it. I want time to go out and have fun. I want to enjoy this as long as it lasts because as soon as we go supercenter we're all gonna be split up and go our own direction. I also think we need time apart. You need to form bonds with your friends too. We've been dependant on each other for everything for so long, it's like we lost our individuality. I like to do things that you don't like to do, and vice versa. I want to do things in life, who knows when life will end. I don't want to miss out on experiences that I have dreamed of because it's not interesting to you. (I Big_Daddy is deathly afraid of flying!!) I've been doing a lot of thinking lately as you probably have noticed, and I'm tired of not knowing who I am. I never had the time to experience the things most people take for granted. As far as spending time with you, we have a trip planned every weekend this month but 1, I spent all day sunday riding with you. I do want to spend time with you. I'm just at a point where I need some space to figure things out. I need to come to terms with my parents issues. I need to come to terms with my brothers issues, and I need to figure out my own issues. I'm tired of being insecure. I'm tired of not loving myself. I want to learn how to make relationships and have friends. I hope you understand all this. It's not that I don't care about you anymore. It's that I'm trying to care about more than just you. I'm sorry that I sleep when you're home. I just can't do it all. I'm too lazy. I would love to have the energy to vacuum everyday and dust and do everything that needs to be done. But I dont. When we're not at work we're running, when we're not running we're relaxing. The situation with your mom is upsetting me too. Add in the fact that I don't trust your siblings as far as I could throw them and it really angers me. I guess I'll just stop there before I get really pissed off. Just know that I'm just trying to improve myself. I want to be able to think independently. I want to know who I am and where I'm going. I'm tired of living in a dark place. Just please understand. I'm sorry if what I'm going through is hard for you, but in order for us to be better together, I think we need to take care of ourselves first. I love you.

I guess I just can't step back and let it run its course. I feel I need to know why why why why !! How do I stop it!!! And I don't understand how she want's me to bond with my friends when all they do is drink and ride their Harleys. They drink way too much for me to hang out with them all the time and I don't drink and drive and she wont let me have a bike!!! Help me please!!!


Ok...obviously she needs time to herself. She makes it pretty clear that she still wants to be with you and spend time with you..she just wants the freedom to explore a bit on her own as well. Thats NOT a bad thing. It will ultimately make her a more well rounded, happier, more well adjusted person.

As for why why why.....because because because.

Seriously..because she does..thats why. Becuase there are things she wants to do that you have no interest in...why should she forgo those interests? Esp if she has found friends willing to share in them with her?

Although it works both ways. If you want a bike....get a bike. You are both adults...there is no "she wont let you". Or at the very least...you "let" her play with her friends and she "lets you" play with your bike.
And you can spend time with your friends...just because they are heavy drinkers doesnt mean you have to be. Go out with the,, nurse a beer and have fun.

You will both have MUCH more to talk about and share with each other and really...is that such a horrible thing?

big_daddy
09-10-2007, 08:25 PM
As for the bike, I can't keep my quad on 4 wheels is the reason she don't want me to have a bike! But that's another story! One more question, her friends are 3 guys and one girl but when they go do something it's been turning out to be one guy and one girl and the last time the girl invited another guy. I don't know them much or at all. And of these 3 people she has known them for 6-8 months, she acts like I don't have the right to be conserned. Do I? She gets along with guys way better than girls, how do I get over this????????

cameron_keys
09-10-2007, 08:42 PM
As for the bike, I can't keep my quad on 4 wheels is the reason she don't want me to have a bike! But that's another story! One more question, her friends are 3 guys and one girl but when they go do something it's been turning out to be one guy and one girl and the last time the girl invited another guy. I don't know them much or at all. And of these 3 people she has known them for 6-8 months, she acts like I don't have the right to be conserned. Do I? She gets along with guys way better than girls, how do I get over this????????

Ask yourself if you trust her. If you do...then thats it. If you dont....you have problems other then her friends.

And her interests may just be more male oriented(you mentioned flying)...so it would naturally attract more guys then girls.

Unless you suspect theyb are doing more then hanging out...dont make issues where there arent any. You'll just drive yourself crazy asking "what if".

Why not join them once or twice. Or suggest you all get together for dinner so you can get to know her friends. Dont interfere with her time alone (which she clearly needs) ...add on tothat. Once you get to know them,maybe you'll feel better. And wanting to meet her friends is not an unreasonable request.

cameron_keys
09-11-2007, 01:18 PM
Did I solve all the problems already?? Keep em comin' people...its insane how happy I am when I get notice that I've got a new question!

Hello_Kitty27
09-11-2007, 06:57 PM
You can fix me!!!

Dear Cameron,

I was doing a good job losing weight, staying motivated and taking care of myself. I was eating healthy (for the most part) and exercising daily. I've gotten lazy and non-motivated lately. I've tried varying up my workout routine, buying new diet books, exercise DVD's....everything. I just keep falling off the bandwagon. This has been going on for about 1-2 months....I've even been eating a LOT of bar food!!!!! (it's just so damn tasty!)

I'm 5'4"....I was at 128lbs and now I'm up to about 134. What can I do to get re-motivated and STAY there?! Even trying to squeeze into the clothes that I was able to wear comfortably a month ago isn't working!


Signed,
Sick of Being Fat!!!!

EDIT: I've also lost all sense of will-power. I can't NOT eat bar food if I'm at a bar and my friends are eating it. Or when my co-workers eat pizza. Or ice cream. I NEVER used to partake, and now I can't stop.

cameron_keys
09-11-2007, 07:11 PM
You can fix me!!!

Dear Cameron,

I was doing a good job losing weight, staying motivated and taking care of myself. I was eating healthy (for the most part) and exercising daily. I've gotten lazy and non-motivated lately. I've tried varying up my workout routine, buying new diet books, exercise DVD's....everything. I just keep falling off the bandwagon. This has been going on for about 1-2 months....I've even been eating a LOT of bar food!!!!! (it's just so damn tasty!)

I'm 5'4"....I was at 128lbs and now I'm up to about 134. What can I do to get re-motivated and STAY there?! Even trying to squeeze into the clothes that I was able to wear comfortably a month ago isn't working!


Signed,
Sick of Being Fat!!!!

EDIT: I've also lost all sense of will-power. I can't NOT eat bar food if I'm at a bar and my friends are eating it. Or when my co-workers eat pizza. Or ice cream. I NEVER used to partake, and now I can't stop.

Oh..it's SOOOO hard to resist yummy stuff when its right there in front of you isnt it?? Compromise with yourself. Bring a protein bar or big salad to work and tell yourself you cant eat any bar food until you've finished all of that. If you are full...you will not eat as much. So you can have 3 buffalo wings before you are stuffed instead of eating 20.

Same with working out. Reward yourself for it.If you do say ...an hour on the treadmill 3 days a week you treat yourself to an hour massage on the weekend(or whatever it is that you enjoy...preferably non-food)

If you can afford it...get a trainer. Many gyms offer them at competitve prices. If you have to be accountable to someone on a reg basis...you are more likely to stick with it.
Be accountable to yourself to...keep a food diary. Write down EVERYTHING you eat every day.(yes..the fries off someone elses plate count!) When you see it all written down...it will bring home how much you are truly eating. Plus...keeping a food diary is exhausting! I know I'll sometimes skip eating something just because I'm too lazy to go get my diary and write it down!

Hello_Kitty27
09-11-2007, 07:56 PM
I still exercise nearly every day (I'd say an avg of 5-6x/wk) on my treadmill. I keep trying to think of other things to vary it up....and I just give up on those and then slack off on the treadmill (25 mins instead of 45, etc).

I can't afford a trainer or even a gym membership right now, but I CAN do a journal. I'm sure after a week, that would gross me out enough to get some kind of will-power back. I mean, shoot ...if I told y'all what I ate on Sunday alone (watching football!)....you'd probably get clogged arteries just hearing about it. Not to mention the beer involved throughout the day ......not good! I keep a journal to track my treadmill/bike usage.....I could probably just write my food down in that, BUT it's kinda out in the open in my house. Maybe I'll have to put it in a more discreet place. I'd die if someone saw it.

cameron_keys
09-11-2007, 08:20 PM
.I could probably just write my food down in that, BUT it's kinda out in the open in my house. Maybe I'll have to put it in a more discreet place. I'd die if someone saw it.

Leave it out. Maybe the thought of that alone will give you willpower. Not only that you have to write it down, but that other people will see it.

AlexxaHex
09-11-2007, 09:05 PM
Which came first - the stripper or the dollar?

cameron_keys
09-11-2007, 09:07 PM
Which came first - the stripper or the dollar?

Based on this video evidence..I'd say the stripper did..

AlexxaHex
09-11-2007, 09:25 PM
Based on this video evidence..I'd say the stripper did..



:laughing:

Oh, that was priceless!

big_daddy
09-13-2007, 12:36 AM
The shit has hit the fan! Now she wants SPACE and she don't know if she want's me back. What can I do to show her I love her but not push her?

cameron_keys
09-13-2007, 08:37 AM
The shit has hit the fan! Now she wants SPACE and she don't know if she want's me back. What can I do to show her I love her but not push her?

If she'll go..you need counseling. NOW.

In the meantime..dont argue. Tell her that you love her and dont want to lose her. That you want to share these things with her.

But sadly...you may just have to let her go and hope that once her oats are sown she'll come back. You cant keep her there if she doesnt want to be there.

big_daddy
09-13-2007, 01:45 PM
I don't want her to be here if she don't want to be, but I want her to want to be here. I have said something about counseling, she don't want to do it, she don't think we can afford it. She has been to them before about other problems, and she don't think they really help much. She left today to go stay away for the weekend to think things out. All I can do is wait and see what happends. I can't make her do anything she has to be the one to do it. The ball is in her court.

mdiver
09-13-2007, 02:51 PM
I don't want her to be here if she don't want to be, but I want her to want to be here. I have said something about counseling, she don't want to do it, she don't think we can afford it. She has been to them before about other problems, and she don't think they really help much. She left today to go stay away for the weekend to think things out. All I can do is wait and see what happends. I can't make her do anything she has to be the one to do it. The ball is in her court.

I am sorry to have to be the one to tell you this but, she is cheating on you, all the signs are there.

big_daddy
09-13-2007, 03:07 PM
She says it's not going on, right now I have to believe her. You don't know her past and what's all involved please don't jump to conclusions.

cameron_keys
09-13-2007, 08:21 PM
She says it's not going on, right now I have to believe her. You don't know her past and what's all involved please don't jump to conclusions.

I agree. If shes being honest about everything else...why lie about that? Not that it isnt a possibility..hell..its ALWAYS a possibility...but it doesnt seem that way to me.

It seems like she is at a place in her life where she isnt sure what she wants or maybe even who she is. Call it a mid life crisis...call it needing to find herself..whatever...but she needs SOMETHING.And she seems to think that she can only find it on her own.

big_daddy
09-13-2007, 08:26 PM
But I want to be that something.

cameron_keys
09-13-2007, 08:30 PM
But I want to be that something.

I know you do. And maybe you will be...but she needs to figure that out on her own.

I know it's hard. I KNOW. But you need to give her a bit of space right now to work these things out in her head. If you look into it...I'm sure you can find low cost counseling in your area. I know she said she doesnt like it...but an objective opinion might help her figure things out.

If she isnt willing to go at all....then you need to let her go. Sounds cheesy..but if its meant to be..she'll come back. Just let her know that you will be there when she does.

cameron_keys
09-13-2007, 08:31 PM
I am sorry to have to be the one to tell you this but, she is cheating on you, all the signs are there.

And no offense...but dont offer advice in my thread. Thanks.

big_daddy
09-13-2007, 08:51 PM
I wish I could give you a hug and tell you how much this all means to me.

sunnie
09-13-2007, 11:19 PM
Cameron,

I have a couple of questions:

1. I slept for four hours last night, sat through hours of boring classes today when I could barely keep my head up, why can I not sleep now?

2. How does one recover from "Cameron Withdrawal" at work? This is particularly plaguing me.

Also: is it a question for the "ages" or for the "sages"?


Incidently, I was rejected from the HIV counselor program, probably because I come from an unrelated field. :( Spanish translating at the community clinic it is! I am ok with that.

Added:

Ok, ok...my real question is: I keep having these unpredictable crying attacks. Where something I don't anticipate triggers this chain reaction where I have to try really hard to not cry. it is usually at school, and untimely and embarrassing. I can work my way down sometimes, but other times, I am trying to calm down and breathe but it makes me more stressed and embarrassed and it lasts until I get home. It happened on the bus the other day in front of a bunch of other students and I had to pretend to be asleep with my sunglasses on to hide it, but I couldn't stop. I know it will go away eventually, but right now I can't predict it, and it is sooooo hard to control.

At home or in my car is fine, it is a kind of painful experience of bad feelings that lasts for a couple of hours, but at least it is in private. At school it is like overwhelming.

Help?!?!


Oh, and I have been trying to get in to see the counslers at school to get a referral for my insurance, i am still waiting. so this is like for in the interim, until I can get someone to talk to on a regular basis. There must be a ton of people going through the same issues of stressors with school, and moving, and money, and pressure...it seems normal. that doesn't make it easier, but it is somewhat comforting.

sunnie
09-13-2007, 11:39 PM
This is why I love stripperweb. I don't know what I would do without it.

cameron_keys
09-14-2007, 09:38 AM
Cameron,

I have a couple of questions:

1. I slept for four hours last night, sat through hours of boring classes today when I could barely keep my head up, why can I not sleep now?

2. How does one recover from "Cameron Withdrawal" at work? This is particularly plaguing me.

Also: is it a question for the "ages" or for the "sages"?


Incidently, I was rejected from the HIV counselor program, probably because I come from an unrelated field. :( Spanish translating at the community clinic it is! I am ok with that.

Added:

Ok, ok...my real question is: I keep having these unpredictable crying attacks. Where something I don't anticipate triggers this chain reaction where I have to try really hard to not cry. it is usually at school, and untimely and embarrassing. I can work my way down sometimes, but other times, I am trying to calm down and breathe but it makes me more stressed and embarrassed and it lasts until I get home. It happened on the bus the other day in front of a bunch of other students and I had to pretend to be asleep with my sunglasses on to hide it, but I couldn't stop. I know it will go away eventually, but right now I can't predict it, and it is sooooo hard to control.

At home or in my car is fine, it is a kind of painful experience of bad feelings that lasts for a couple of hours, but at least it is in private. At school it is like overwhelming.

Help?!?!


Oh, and I have been trying to get in to see the counslers at school to get a referral for my insurance, i am still waiting. so this is like for in the interim, until I can get someone to talk to on a regular basis. There must be a ton of people going through the same issues of stressors with school, and moving, and money, and pressure...it seems normal. that doesn't make it easier, but it is somewhat comforting.


Awww..I wish I could come dance up there for a few weeks to acclimate you...wean you off me!LOLOL!

And congrats about the translating job..obviously thats where you were meant to be! Give it your all...I know you will!

As for the rest....you just turned your entire world upside down..of COURSE you are an emotional wreck right now! Add in the stresses of work and school and I'd be worried about you if you werent. Just take deep breaths and remember WHY you are there. And that it isnt forever. If you dont grow to love it...meh...when you graduate..you're out of there. No big deal.

Get a piece of paper and write on it all the reasons you did this. Why you moved there and all the things it will give you. All the advantages you'll have when you are done. How FABULOUS your future will be. Keep it with you at all times...tuck it into your bra so it is close to your heart. When you feel emotional...take it out and read it. It will put everything back into perspective for you.

Keep your chin up kid!! We miss you here! Work blows though...so you arent missing out on ANYTHING!! $300 is a fabulous day now. And they are few and far between. Ugh. You left JUST in time!

cameron_keys
09-14-2007, 09:39 AM
I wish I could give you a hug and tell you how much this all means to me.

Hugs back to you! I hope it is helping!

big_daddy
09-15-2007, 12:26 AM
Yes it is! If I could fly I would be down there in a heart beat!!