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Lyssa Lynn
09-28-2007, 07:10 AM
Money makes the world go round. I say go for it. You've dealt with this guy for 6 years now, he must be quite tolerable to you.. Marry 1st for money, (of course do follow everyone elses advise about checking up on him and getting a pre nup)..you can travel the world, have all kinds of experiences only power and money can provide, have a child with enough money for the best nannys, be able to provide the best health care, college savings etc.. do this all now while you are young and have the opportunity! Then later on you can fall in love and marry for all the stupid mushy reasons.::)

twisterinAZ
09-28-2007, 07:11 AM
What attracts people is always different......

Kaylinn
09-28-2007, 07:15 AM
Very true. I was just saying that personally, I could not do it...although I wish I could.

twisterinAZ
09-28-2007, 07:19 AM
I'm hot girl, even if I can't afford you...

tee hee

Sh0t
09-28-2007, 11:59 AM
if money makes you happy, marrying for money means you are marrying for happiness.

we all want to be happy

love is overrated and is rarely with your spouse anyway

All Good Things
09-28-2007, 10:40 PM
"People who marry for money earn it."

The wisdom in this saying is that money upends the power balance that exists in a normal relationship. If you are marrying for money only, the money alone has to compensate for a huge range of important aspects that would exist and be shared in a normal love-based relationship, such as compatibility, physical attraction, strong sexual intimacy, shared interests, common outlooks and similar or compatible senses of humor, patience, tolerance, compassion, etc.

Without those, the enormous emotional cost of ignoring the absence of these shared qualities is what makes it so much work. It seems to me that it would be emotionally draining on an unimaginable scale, to say nothing of dispiriting, depressing, disheartening and bone-wearingly lonely.

In historical arranged marriages where love plays no role, couples are often thrust into a shared state of nervousness, confusion and trepidation. These marriages often work out because these couples who are "in this together" figure out a way to make it work. They grow into it together. In some cultures, "making it work" allows love interests outside the marriage. In other countries, there is a strong overriding belief that the marriage itself is simply a material contract -- a legal form of material and familial security to sustain a family and support the raising of children. Happiness is defined in terms of the success of the family unit.

In our culture, which is much more focused on an individual's own happiness, we tend to favor the romantic. But love is more fickle and unpredictable than we like to admit, so we have retained the contract aspect of marriage to put some walls around it.

While none of us has a clue about whether the OP should marry for money alone or not (since we have so little information), I would still suggest that if she's grown up in our culture and absorbed its expectations and social practices, it would be a much more risky arrangement than a more "conventional" marriage.

miabella
09-28-2007, 11:38 PM
i have learned the hard way that money doesn't necessarily upend the power balance in a relationship. so i'm really hesistant to approve or disprove of 'marrying for money'.

but then, for me, (paper) money is a very theoretical construct and ever has been.