I can't sleep. In 7 hours I need to get up and take my dog to the vet.But I'm not even close to sleep, even thought I only slept 5 hours last night and my eyes are red. Deep down I know that with no income money will run out VERY soon, and the only place that I can most likely get a job NOW is fast food. That makes me nauseous. Do what you gotta do right? I just want so badly to make some money so I can go down to San Francisco for the meetup. I feel so isolated up here in the mountains. I drove the 75 miles one way back and forth today to Santa Rosa for an appointment and it took the whole day and exhausted me. I feel like I'm separated from reality up here! That's why I so desperately want to go to SFSWFest. But I also want to go home for Christmas. Mom will be going home too. I haven't been home to Wisconsin to see family in 5 years. It breaks my heart. I feel like a loser for having to go back to FF. I actually broke down and cried tonight. I was so good at not doing that and keeping up my fake positiveness.
Sheesh. I could really use some words of encouragement.
And before we go throught the "maybe you could dance", no, my situation doesn't permit it.
Thanks for listening.

