Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
I have a hetero couple that comes to see me at least twice a week. They are really polite, late 40's. They never get dances but tip me well at the rack (sometimes 10 bucks each a song). They are not "pervy"...they say they are happy to support my college education by tipping. They went on a vacation cruise and bought me a t-shirt/showed me all of their photos...just to give you an idea of what they are like. SO, now the woman wants to take me to her favorite salon to get my hair or makeup done, she says she'd pay for it. Last night she gave me the salon's brochure with her phone number on it and said "Call me and we'll go." I told her I was really busy with school and had not been doing photo shoots lately, so I had no occasion to go and get all dolled up. Then I said next time I do a shoot I would definitely check the place out, and thanks.
I am not fond of OTC. I also don't want to lose these regs. Your thoughts on what I should do? Would you meet her at the salon? Call her from a pay phone? If I just don't want to go, how can I let her down as easily as possible?:-\
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Could you maybe go to the salon alone? Do you want to go?
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Quote:
Originally Posted by
hearts
I have a hetero couple that comes to see me at least twice a week. They are really polite, late 40's. They never get dances but tip me well at the rack (sometimes 10 bucks each a song). They are not "pervy"...they say they are happy to support my college education by tipping. They went on a vacation cruise and bought me a t-shirt/showed me all of their photos...just to give you an idea of what they are like. SO, now the woman wants to take me to her favorite salon to get my hair or makeup done, she says she'd pay for it. Last night she gave me the salon's brochure with her phone number on it and said "Call me and we'll go." I am not fond of OTC. I also don't want to lose these regs. Your thoughts on what I should do? Would you meet her at the salon? Call her from a pay I told her I was really busy with school and had not been doing photo shoots lately, so I had no occasion to go and get all dolled up. Then I said next time I do a shoot I would definitely check the place out, and thanks. phone? If I just don't want to go, how can I let her down as easily as possible?:-\
That is perfect. No need to even call her, but use something along these lines next time you see her in the club. It sounds like she wants a hot young buddy to hang with. If she really wanted to treat you to getting dolled up she could've bought you a gift card.
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
How much money per week are you talking about? If they truly contribute a significant portion of your weekly earnings, then I'd worry about it. If it's little more than a drop in your bucket, then I'd not sweat it. Sounds like they are nice people, but who cares if they're not contributing a truly significant amount to your income?
The above comment by SarahSynn is really on point. I wouldn't be surprised if she's casually fishing for a hot friend for hanging out and possibly more. Even if the couple turns out to be a couple of swingers, chances are they'll probably continue to be nice customers for you, as most respectable swingers understand polite rejection.
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
So I have talked to them a few more times and have decided to go to the salon with her. She says she used to be a stripper, and I do believe her. They came in 3 times so far this week, stayed for several hours, and tipped me at least 20 bucks for every 2 song set I did--and they came to the stage EVERY time i was up.
I told her I will go, but it will be a few weeks until I can b/c of school. I plan to call her from a pay phone, meet her there, and schedule a photoshoot with a photographer friend for afterward so I will have someplace I have to be. A bonus is that I can show her the photos from the shoot she paid for me to get all dolled up for.
I have never done OTC before (the idea of it sounded creepy and dangerous) but I feel pretty comfortable with these people, so...I'm going for it.
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
I met my wife of 10 years while she was working in a club. She says meeting me was the best decision she ever made in her life. While not the same, go for it, you really have nothing to lose,
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
^^^ I very much disagree. OTC is very risky business and you do have a lot to lose. I think hearts is going about this in a very safe way. Kudos to her for watching out for her own safety.
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
^Indeed. But the good news is, you are going to a public place, so there's not *too* much trouble you should be able to get into.
It would make me nervous though, if they wanted you to meet them at their house or something. Are you driving yourself?
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Since you are talking about a couple, personally I think they see you as a potential swinging partner. I don't see anything to fear from them, but 9 times out of 10 when a couple is involved, they are looking at a dancer to "swing" with them.
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Just trust your instincts...I have a few VERY good customers who I occasionally meet OTC...for lunch, shopping, etc...I have always been very clear about my boundaries, and so far have never had a bad experience, and it's DEFINTELY helped me financially.....but these are very specific situations with people I trust, and who I know I'm on the same level with in terms of what the relationship is about.
Point being, just trust your instincts, if you want to try hanging out with her OTC, go for it, but if it gets uncomfortable, just find a polite way to get out ASAP
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
you may think they're not pervy, but obviously they're getting SOMETHING out of visiting you in the club several times a week.....it's sorta niave to think they want to give you tuition money.... dude, you know they talk about you while they're doing "it"
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Stay alert, be safe, and stay in populated areas. I recently was put in a very scary situation, and all too late did I realize that there were small security measures I could've taken. And this was all still ITC!
Anyway, even if they DO have a couple crush on you, and talk about you while they do it, who cares? As long as they treat you respectfully, and you remain safe and alert.....but ultimately, YOU have to set your own boundaries and YOU have to decide how comfortable you are with the situation. This is a really gray area, so BE ALERT!
Best of luck, sweetie!
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
It almost sounds like she's trying to mother you. I know that sounds wrong but they don't get dances from you and they've never asked you for anything "more." She sounds like she just wants to take care of you by GIVING you money for school and wanting to take you out and get your hair done etc... She sounds harmless to me. If you do go just make sure you let someone know where you'll be and what time to expect you back and always take separate cars. BUT you probably already knew this!
Re: Help with COUPLE regulars/OTC situation
Quote:
Originally Posted by
kaiarose
It almost sounds like she's trying to mother you. I know that sounds wrong but they don't get dances from you and they've never asked you for anything "more." She sounds like she just wants to take care of you by GIVING you money for school and wanting to take you out and get your hair done etc... She sounds harmless to me. If you do go just make sure you let someone know where you'll be and what time to expect you back and always take separate cars. BUT you probably already knew this!
I don't think this is it. I have noticed them both giving me "the eyes"...you know what I mean. To UPDATE: they keep coming in, they keep tipping. They have not mentioned OTC at all this week. They have started tipping one of the other girls, so I'm hoping that they just move on to her. Honestly, I just don't think it's worth my time or trouble anymore. I've actually encouraged my coworker to "take them" because I don't wanna deal with it. Bah!