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guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
so i know i brought this on my self a bit... but...a custy i was on good terms with wanted to take me to dinner (at my suggestion because i wasnt working at a club). i clarified twice that i wanted to be tipped for 2 hours work regardless of how long we spent there ( i said i would spend longer then 2 hours, that was just what i wanted as a tip.) so we go to dinner for 4 hours at way less then the cost of champagne (500 for 2 hours to the house + 1000 for 2 hours for me) and then he leaves without tipping...
he didnt run off but he was drunk and i wanted to give him the chance to tip me when he sobered up in the morning, instead of me nagging him at the end of the evening (i know he might not end up tipping me but i was willing to risk it.)
i wont ever see him again if he doesnt value my time...so, why wont guys willing to shell out so much money in the club spend a portion of that at dinner. wouldnt a guy rather spend a more personal evening with a lady he likes at a fraction of the cost? with a chance of more OTC time to follow?
guys push so much for time OTC but cant follow through, why ruin it for your selves and others? why not just pay the money? you know you wont get any action for free...?
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Heh....wish I could sympathize. Guys are guys.. they want to see you OTC and save money. Maybe he was faking being inebriated just to scam you...
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
we split 2 bottles of wine with dinner, then each had a sambuca, then split a hookah and he doesnt smoke (nicoten) and i know you can get a buzz from that...he wasnt trashed.
what its going to come down too is no money mo more dinners. my experience with meeting for lunch or dinner has been mixed but mostly positive, i guess its all trial and error.
well im off to shoot him an email saying i had so much fun i forgot to get my tip from you.
i was hoping for some customer feed back...
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
If he agreed to pay it, just politely ask him for it. I mean, why assume he didn't intend to pay you until he refuses to pay you? I'm sure if you were clear, he probably just either felt awkward about paying you if you didn't bring it up, or felt vindicated (like she doesn't really want it) because you didn't. I'm sure if you are nice about it, it will all be fine.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Always get the money up front. Guys play a game to get you OTC sometimes thinking they're cute and that you'll spend time for free. If he doesn't pay up, ban him from the club (if you start working at one) and certainly do not deal with him again until (unless) he pays up and then if he wants to see you again, tell him he pays first or it's no go...He wants to dance? He has to pay the band...
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
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Originally Posted by
kat 3322
...i was hoping for some customer feed back...
Don't wish for it, you might get it! ;)
More seriously, it may have been a triumph of hope over expectation.
Sure, he knew he had to tip for your time, but we custies are incurable optimists. He'd probably half convinced himself beforehand that when you got to know the real him, you'd forget all about being tipped and bask in the pleasure of his company.
Come the actual dinner, reality struck and you did want a tip.
Look at it from the male POV - he probably had hopes that your motives were more than just being paid for your time. Unfortunately for him they weren't, which probably didn't do his self esteem any good.
Phil.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Well, the guy was an a-hole. Don't let being drunk pass for an excuse. Sadly some of these losers think that, once you are out with them, the dinner and their incredibly banal conversation should be enough to make you happy. It sounds like you were very clear with the guy about what the costs would be for his OTC experience. There is really no excuse for his behavior.
I've done OTC for pay and for fun and every girl I've done it with for pay has a story or two like yours.
Look, I don't want to compare OTC dinner dates to escorting but it IS play for pay just the same and you should always get the money up front.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Many customers they have this delusion that once you get to know them OTC that you will find them SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO handsome, funny, kind, sweet, etc. that you will no longer worry about making money to pay your bills and spend time with him for free. When they realize that you are a flesh and bone real person who gets colds, has children, bills to pay instead of their fantasy valkyrie, it's crushing sometimes for them. Find someone who simply wants to the opportunity to spend uninterrupted time with you and give you all the money he spends (without you having to tip out to anyone) in the club with no hassles.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
i told him that he could tip me for a couple hours (he usually does 2 hours in champagne) but if we were at dinner for longer that would be fine. he's one of those guys that comes to the club for talking and company i've never given him dances.
i sort of figured part of it was "maybe she will really like me and not care about the money" but i was a bit sheepish about asking for a grand in cash in the middle of a small (aka someone might notice) resturant, which is my own fault.
ive been too busy to email him but im going to today and i'll post the results.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
..a grand in cash? 2 hours of your time is worth a grand?
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
That's close to what it would be in Texas...
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
The dude is a loser, particularly considering the terms laid out in advance.
Quote:
wouldnt a guy rather spend a more personal evening with a lady he likes at a fraction of the cost? with a chance of more OTC time to follow?
Not if he really doesn't want to do P4P in the first place. Remember, much as it's not discussed here on the Pink Side, OTC action does happen on a pro bono basis sometimes, and maybe this guy thought it would happen for him...though that obviously would have required you conveniently forgetting your earlier arrangement.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
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Originally Posted by
Casual Observer
Remember, much as it's not discussed here on the Pink Side, OTC action does happen on a pro bono basis sometimes, and maybe this guy thought it would happen for him...
Maybe another dancer chose to meet him for free. Maybe he doesn't care whether he stiffed the OP, because he doesn't need her anymore. :-\
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
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Originally Posted by
britt244
..a grand in cash? 2 hours of your time is worth a grand?
She spent 4 hours with him.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
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Originally Posted by
TheSexKitten
She spent 4 hours with him.
In the OP she stated that she agreed to the equivalent of 2 hours in VIP for her fee even though she would stay longer.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
did the custy ever pay you?
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
britt244
..a grand in cash? 2 hours of your time is worth a grand?
I know that mine is... maybe even more than that! :P
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Maybe calling it a tip was part of the problem. A tip sounds like something voluntary. And you mentioned throwing in some extra time. This may have muddied the waters. Play for pay should be a clear agreement with the terms and conditions spelled out upfront. That is the only way it can work.
FBR
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
I know he wronged you, but some guys out of the stripping atmosphere are not going to feel like they do inside the club. He may have felt it was a date kinda thing (in his mind, more serious) and wanted it to all feel very "normal".
I don't know. I have seen customers out shopping and they are so different. In the clubs they are so geared towards spending money, it's a sexual atmosphere.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
They seemed to have discussed the payment arrangements long before the date was supposed to happen. He knew he had to pay to play. He was wrong in taking her time and not paying her for it. She was wrong in not making him pay up front.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
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Originally Posted by
MinahSky
They seemed to have discussed the payment arrangements long before the date was supposed to happen. He knew he had to pay to play. He was wtrong in taking her time and not paying her for it. She was wrong in not making him pay up front.
That being said. It is bad practice to take any customer out of the club. People lie! Some custys will offer you a car to take you out after work. ::)
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
Bad practice or not, it happens. But if she had asked for it in advance, this wouldn't have happened. She could have cut the BS with him short. I am sure he hasn't "graced" the club since and she's still upset and hasn't gotten paid.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
I don't do OTC, but I think your client is the same sort of person who goes to a restaurant, eats, then goes to the restroom and leaves without paying the bill or leaving a tip.
You should have asked him to pay up front, and you should contact him asking to be paid. I suppose you could take him to small claims court, but unless you had witnesses or a written contract, you would not get anything out of that.
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
I would think just being served the suit would be enough...
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Re: guys want OTC time but dont want to follow through...?
^^^Come to think of it, you are right. This guy would probably not want it to become public knowledge that he hired a beautiful woman to have dinner with him, then welshed on paying her.