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10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
This is a "Best of Craigslist" list that I found very amusing. I hope you do too.
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First of all, chivalry is alive and well, so a big thanks to all the lovely gentlemen who open doors, offer up your seats when the Metro is standing room only (I rarely accept, but your willingness to sacrifice is very sweet), and...oh: to the ones who rush to assist me when I drop my purse on the sidewalk and its contents - which are countless and, let's face it, largely unnecessary unless I find myself in some sort of survival situation - spill out all over 17th St. Thank you all very much!
...But the chivalrous acts aren't really what gets me. The things I truly love about men are all the things you might not recognize as being "lovable" or appealing to women. Such as:
1. The hilarious, obnoxious and totally adorable banter that goes on between two guys when they're playing a video game. If you know that scene from "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" ("I'm ripping your head off now...aaannd now I'm throwing it at your body...F%$K YOU!"), that's it in a nutshell. I know it isn't meant to be, but it's just so frigging cute.
2. The sound a man sometimes makes when I walk past him in a low-cut top. Hard to describe, but it's sort of a sing-songy little chirp of appreciation that he literally can not seem to hold in. Somewhat akin to the sound a very small animal might make if you squeezed its abdomen too tightly. (PETA folks please note: I have never actually squeezed a small animal's abdomen. I am merely speculating as to what it *might* sound like).
3. The stance you adopt when taking a good, long, desperately needed piss: leaning forward at a roughly 60-degree angle, one hand braced against the wall in front of you, the other hand gripping your kickstand...I don't know how, but it manages to make you look both strong and vulnerable. I love it.
4. The way a guy will use the pronoun "we" when discussing his favorite team. For example: "I can't believe we traded Player X" or "Dude, we are so gonna annihilate Team X in the playoffs." I always found that kind of sweet and oddly endearing.
5. I'm also rather fond of your forgetfulness. To go back to sports, I think it's amazing that you can forget key dates like birthdays and anniversaries and all that crap...but can immediately recall the stats of Player X, not to mention his hometown, height and weight, and what college he played for. Incredible! I'm much more amused than bothered by it.
6. The way all men look when they first wake up in the morning: boyish, crazy messed-up bed head, puffy eyes and lips, morning wood at half-mast. Awww, ya just look so sweet and defenseless!
7. The act of showing possession by smacking their girl's butt in public. Of course, not all men do this...but the kind I like do. My only criticism is, if you're not going to do it loud and hard enough for everyone in the immediate vicinity to take notice, don't bother.
8. The manner in which most guys (who don't have kids or maybe nieces/nephews) hold little babies: ehhhver-so-gently and barely moving, as if they're cradling delicate explosives and are afraid that the slightest movement might cause the thing to explode.
9. When I see that some of you suit wearers have pulled/slackened your ties on the Metro ride home from work, as though you simply couldn't wait until you got home and needed immediate relief, making the adjustment the moment you stepped out of your office building. Ahhh, freedom.
10. The fact that maybe 95% of you have NO IDEA how amazing and perfect you are in all your idiosyncratic maleness. *Sigh* I wish I could date every last one of you...
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
I love this. Thanks for sharing.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
What I don't like... when they fart under the covers.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Bella21
What I don't like... when they fart under the covers.
I've heard of guys pushing their girlfriend's head under the covers after that too! lol.
I could never do that but it does give me a laugh.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Ahh, the old Dutch Oven. My ex-husband was a big fan.
I actually like it when men fart. It makes me giggle.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
I love the men who 'get it' that if you let me ramble on about whatever topic is on my mind at the moment, that I'll not only willingly but with much enthusiasm jump his bones, since we have such a 'great connection'. Don't worry, I know you were just waiting for me to get whatever it was off my chest and weren't really listening. I'm just happy that he is happy to indulge me.:)
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Paris ^^^ I'm totally utterly with you there!
I do love how men "bond" amongst each other be it over a video game, sports or whatever. I find it endearing more than annoying esp. considering I have been around it (as such) with my private party work.
I do also have to agree with the part in number 7:
My only criticism is, if you're not going to do it loud and hard enough for everyone in the immediate vicinity to take notice, don't bother.
:hot::faint: oh hell yeah............
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Great post. :) Thanks LOL
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
You're welcome girls. I'm glad everyone enjoys it.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
This is cute.
These pertain to American males- I've noticed men from foreign countries can often be as charming, but in different ways.
I only wish men would try harder to take eachother "under the wing" so there would be little to no male cluelessness left....However, women are hard to please so maybe there will always be some friction.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
madmaxine
This is cute.
These pertain to American males- I've noticed men from foreign countries can often be as charming, but in different ways.
I only wish men would try harder to take eachother "under the wing" so there would be little to no male cluelessness left....However, women are hard to please so maybe there will always be some friction.
Under the wing regarding what specifically?
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Well...for example, in a lot of recent movies you see guys talking to eachother about women (like the "American Pie" movies) & I've dated some dudes who share the content of male pow-wows (guy speak is way funnier than girl group-speak.)
IMO if men got together and mentored eachother, it would only be good for all. This is something I recall from seeing my brother's football and wrestling teams interact with their coaches....
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Eh, I can do without the smacking of the ass in public. I'm not a piece of meat, thanks.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
I love it. The buttsmackery (assuming there aren't kids around, of course) and the list. Was nodding on over half of those in total understanding.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
I'm with #6 especially!
And am I the only one who really loves it when men call each other "Brother"? K hates that so he doesn't do it, but I like it very much when men do that. I don't know why.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
madmaxine
This is cute.
These pertain to American males- I've noticed men from foreign countries can often be as charming, but in different ways.
I only wish men would try harder to take eachother "under the wing" so there would be little to no male cluelessness left.....
Here is why that won't work...
1-Not all women want the same thing, so there's no real standard that we can teach other to adhere to.
2-Guys that are peers to each other will tell a friend to fuck off if you try to tell them how to deal with chicks. You know that cuteness that is described above about banter during video games? That banter is about all that guys ever really do, until they get to about 35 years old, and then it just decreases a little as time goes by. And learning from people older? By the time you're old enough to listen, you've figured it out.
3-If you do happen to figure it out at a young age, most guys are too competitive to help other guys out anyway.
Basically, we're just a bunch of hormone-driven idiots when it comes to women. The idiocy lessens as we get older and learn, but it never goes away completely.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
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1-Not all women want the same thing, so there's no real standard that we can teach other to adhere to.
Agreed.
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3-If you do happen to figure it out at a young age, most guys are too competitive to help other guys out anyway.
I disagree. Like many other things for men, when it comes to women, it's a team effort. Unlike women, who are catty and continually at each other over one thing or another, men actively support other men in the arena of women--irrespective of their socio-economic status. If a poor schlub in an otherwise diverse group of men scores with a hot chick, it's considered a team point. If one of them "wins," they all "win."
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
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Originally Posted by
Casual Observer
Agreed.
I disagree. Like many other things for men, when it comes to women, it's a team effort. Unlike women, who are catty and continually at each other over one thing or another, men actively support other men in the arena of women--irrespective of their socio-economic status. If a poor schlub in an otherwise diverse group of men scores with a hot chick, it's considered a team point. If one of them "wins," they all "win."
I'll give you this point to a degree...if a buddy is fixing to pick up a chick at a bar (and it doesn't matter what she looks like), we'll do anything to help them as long as it doesn't screw up our own chances. We won't "save" a friend like chicks tend to do. However, if you're a 19 year old who realizes how to get with girls more than the other guys you know, you won't share it, partially because you have the secret and partially because you know no one else will listen to you anyway.
In any case, so few guys have a clue about how to really deal with women until they're about 30 that it doesn't matter anyway. Actually, make that 35.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
I've dealt with a fair number of women pretty successfully, but I don't try to pass it on, unless a really close friend and I discuss it, because a lot of it goes against the guys' sociologic gender training**. I don't hit my head against walls, either.
I agree, there's nothing like male bonding. Well, to me, anyway. I've bonded with a lot of people, but the really close guy friends who are just mercilessly brutal with each other ... just a great, great feeling.
**Example, the old guy joke: "Why do women fake orgasms?" "Because they think we care!!" Except a lot of guys, down deep, don't really consider it a joke. Not at game time, anyway.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Casual Observer
Like many other things for men, when it comes to women, it's a team effort. Unlike women, who are catty and continually at each other over one thing or another, men actively support other men in the arena of women--irrespective of their socio-economic status. If a poor schlub in an otherwise diverse group of men scores with a hot chick, it's considered a team point. If one of them "wins," they all "win."
This is what I like about men....Chris Rock put it this way, When a guy friend introduces a good girlfriend, his guy buddy says, I gotta get me a girl like that. When women do the same, the girl friend goes, I gotta get HIM!
Maybe it's just about numbers (less good males to go around)?
Chivalry- I know men who have been stricken in situations where they really wanted to help a girl but it didn't work out. My kid brother was torn up over a girl he met who overdosed (fatally) a week after a party in which he was unable to hang out with her like he wanted to....I told him I thought the girl had problems he couldn't solve, but he still feels bad. IMO it was the male urge to protect and feeling like he "failed."
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
They say men are simple.
I think that is only relative...
Women are complex.
But they like our 'simpleness." And that is cool!
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Traditionally, men have offered the cave to get to the sex. Women have offered the sex to get into the cave. Tradition isn't the best anymore, but it's had an impact on human interactions.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
i like watching my husband pee
He always gets this sexy shiver afterwards
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
This was adorable. I love quirks.
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Re: 10 Things I Love About All You Holders of the XY Chromosome (i.e. MEN)
Mine is still a perfect gentleman and even opens the car door now and then.