Some guys like a challenge. :shrug: I don't think it's brainwashing, seems more like biding time.
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^^^^^^^^
I'm thinking that I'll just tell my SD that I've been burned with dudes just wanting to hit it and quit it. I'm simply practicing abstinence or saving myself. If he can't respect me for it then that makes him look like the jerk. I'm hoping this approach works.
What's with SD4Me.com being a pay site for women as well as men? Does anyone have a membership that she actually pays for? That just seems annoying to me.
Aubreyyy I love you for posting this! Thank you!!
More is coming, I promise! Work is crazy today and I can't exactly sit on my stripper site all day long lol
Many different approaches. You'll never break the ones that are just in it for sex. There are some that are in it for se AND other things. Those are the ones you should focus on trying to win over.
Tell him that you have much more to offer him than just sex. I've used this line- "I feel like I have a great opportunity in finding an SD- I mean, the guys on this site are some of the best in their respective fields! I want my daddy to be someone I have a lot to learn from...Mentor me...Help me better myself..." Blah Blah Blah.
Wow the more I read about SDs the more I wanna try this out! I talked to my boyfriend about it, and while he is ok with stripping, he thinks that SDs are crossing the line. Honestly, I'd totally have sex with a guy for that kinda income LOL, and I would have no problem keeping that as "work" and coming home to my family as I do normally. But I can see why the bf wouldn't like the idea, but hey to me sex isn't really sex if you don't care about the person. I might try the whole "not having sex" with the SD, but I doubt bf will like that idea either... hmmm.... tempting to just do it w/o the bf's permission lol, but I do value my integrity. I guess! Ha!
OH and here's a good question: what are some red flags that the alleged SD is really a rapist, serial killer, or other bad things?
Get someone's name, and google them. If a guy is making enough money to pay you 1000s of dollars, he's on the internet. Check him out, get his work email, something. If he's legit, he'll have no issues with this as long as you've met a couple of times and he trusts that you are discrete.
I would never go to an SD's home though...If I ever slept with one it would be going down at a hotel.
Yeah I dunno if I'd actually have the guts to sleep with an SD, although I definitely in theory would for something to the tune of 120k annually. But you never really know how you feel about something until you're in that situation, so who knows, maybe I really wouldn't be comfortable with it.
How often would you say strippers meet SDs in the club?
This thread is awesome, awesome, awesome! Aubreyyy deserves some kind of a strippa medal. :-)
More questions on the "no sex" thing: *when* should it come up? Like, should there be something in your profile, or in the first conversation, or what? What are some things that you can put in a profile as subtle 'hints' that it's not going to be sexual, at least at first? ;D If that's when you disclose, I mean...
I'm wondering whether the student thing, and presenting as much of a 'regular girl' as possible, helps to that end... or are there other key phrases? like "looking for a true gentleman", "old-fashioned guy", that sort of thing.
Aubreyy first of all thank you for this thread...
My question is:
Say you meet a guy on a site. You go out to dinner a couple times, and you've allready maybe said loosely you want 3-5k a month (what I would expect). At what point do you flatly ask for cash, and how do you phrase it? Before anything "further" happens if you know what I mean ;)
^^^
Just bring it up, but cutely. "Hey sweetie, I was just wondering how you preferred to do your allowance? I know a lot of guys do it differently...I personally prefer cash/check/you to pay my bills directly/etc."
I have a debit card that my allowance gets loaded onto every month.
^^^
Thanks so much for the tip!
Are there any legal dangers of doing this? Say for example SD gives you the money over time, you don't put out, he then sues you claiming it was a loan. What are the chances he can win?
^^^ Melonie's said a fair amount about legal CYA stuff in other threads... mostly amounting to, make sure all gifts are in your name, ask if he's writing off and if he is, pay taxes.
I'd have no problem printing out emails and providing them...
I can't see the legal danger unless you're promising to have sex and you don't. I'm not telling anyone to promise anything :) What we're talking about trying to avoid is when you start and arrangement with no sex agreed on, then the guy changing his mind and wanting sex eventually.
Also- I seriously doubt any of these men would want to be publicly involved in a legal battle with their sugar baby. Over half of these guys (at least) are somewhat happily married...don't want the wife taking half of everything for cheating.
On the first date do you expect SD himself to bring up the money/issue ?? If he don't - What about telling your really need money for your rent ?? Does that amke you sound to desperate ?? Desperate = Sex ...
^^^
Bring it up BEFORE YOU MEET. My first couple of SD experiences I thought he'd bring it up and he never did...so I went on all of these dates and NEVER got paid. And it sucked.
^ you are in trouble if you even mention sex and money. Whether you go through with it or not. You would still be solicitating.
On a different note, I signed up for one of the sites. I think I posted a well rounded profile. My question is, do you pay for a premium membership so you can contact men? Or do you stay on the free side and let them come to you?
I could be wrong, but I've seen episodes of cops where the women just says she will do "x" for $ and she gets arrested. Even if she doesn't actually do it, she just agrees to the deal. Maybe that is only in some states, though. I'm not sure. But this would only apply if it was a setup :p
do any of these guys on these sites like domineering women? or are they all looking to pay for cute girly arm candy?
ive been involved with men who get off paying dominant woman for nothing and i was wondering if they frequent sugar daddy sites too.
^^ you're thinking more along the lines of a financial/money slave, which is a bit different than a sugar daddy
a bdsm forum might be able to answer your questions better
ps. I love this thread! this post is my subscribing!
Do most SD's want to know your real name and details about your personal life?
What kind of stuff does one do with a SD, if not sex?
Also, what if you are contacted by people who live out of your area? I have limited capacity to travel. Is e-mail/phone calls enough?
Grace, I doubt you'd be able to bag an out of town SD if you can't travel. Just put in your "what i'm looking for" section that it would have to be a local arrangement b/c you can't travel.