Going back to work after a long vacation
Ugh! I just can't seem to pull myself together to go back to work! I've been back from vacation since Monday. I swore I would go in Wednesday night, which is usually a good night for me, and didn't go. Then I swore I would go in tonight no matter what, and here it is almost 3:00 in the afternoon and I am just not feeling it.
This is the first time since I have been dancing (which is a little over a year now) that I have taken a vacation. I didn't think it would be this hard to go back in. I mean, yeah, going back to work always sucks after you just had the funnest, relaxing, most bomb ass vacation of your life. Thing is, in the past I've had normal jobs and haven't had a choice. Last time we went on vacation I was still waiting tables, and was scheduled the next day so I had to work or else.
Now here I am at a job where I have the liberty of working whenever the fuck I want cause they don't do schedules here. I feel like I am being totally irresponsible with that privelage. It almost makes me wish we had schedules.
I don't know what my problem is! I am so freakin' nervous thinking about going back to my club! I feel like a scared newbie all over again, when I would get all gussied up and ready for work, and not go cause I was so nervous. WTF? I have no reason to feel this way. I like my club!
Then there's the negative nelly coming out in me, that just isn't ready to go back and face the rejection, the rude comments about my tattoos, the girl that likes to harass me....blah blah blah.
I've been doing a pretty good job of warding those things off before and going to work anyway. Now all of a sudden they are scaring me.
I need to go in , dammit! We are down to our last 200$ in checking and have bills to pay. I need to make something soon. If I don't go in tonight, that means I will not go in until Sunday (I stopped working Fri and Sat cause I wasn't doing as good $ and too much drama in the club)
I am torn. Go in tonight, even though I am not feeling it at all, or wait till Sunday. Then I am afraid if I let more time pass without going to work, will this get worse? Then will I not want to go in on Sunday either?
Force myself to go in tonight and get back into the groove.....
or...
Wait a few more days and chance making this mental fuck over even worse...
:shrug:
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
So did you wind up going?
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
Didn't make it in....
Got in the shower, started shaving and cut a huge gash in my underarm, then, got out of the tub slipped and bashed my leg on the counter got a huge bruise, then ripped my nail down to the skin and it started bleeding...
I was like, ok, this is ridiculous. I was forcing myself to be in a good mood and after all that, I started thinking maybe it's just not meant to be.
I'm feeling better today, the mental funk is starting to fade. Gonna relax today and tomorrrow and rock the hell out of Sunday, like I always do.
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
SUNDAY IS UR DAY CHERRY BOMB.. all the things that happened that night were a sign...
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
your going through vacation with drawl.... just force yourself like you said Sunday and you will be back in the swing of things!
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
I am in the same predicament as you. I too got back from a vacation on monday that lasted 3 weeks. Soooo fun. But now that I am back home realities hit and I realize I must work. I've been sleeping it off but got all ready to go to work yesterday (had really bad gas) and then today (had really bad drama) so i never made it in. Plus I gained weight on vacation so I don't want everyone to be look at me and go eww, so my self esteem isn't the greatest. But I am going to force myself in tomorrow, fat little self and all.
Re: Going back to work after a long vacation
How much weight can you really gain in three weeks? I know we're working in a super body-conscious industry, but you're probably seeing yourself as "fatter" than you are.
And, besides, once you get back to work and start hustling, those three extra pounds will fall right off. :-D