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Darcy's thread got me thinking...
How appropriate/inappropriate is it to comment to people when they are doing something that is clearly bad parenting?
In Darcy's example...is it ok to approach the parents of the 9 year old girl wearing a t-shirt that says "I'm in your boyfriend's Top 8" and say something like "Do you know what that t-shirt means?"
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Personally, in that incident, no, I would not say something to the parents. They know their kid is wearing that and all it'll do is offend the parents and start an arguement. The only way I'd ever say something is if I was a friend of the parent.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Well if you want to get a slap, or a yell or a "I know you just didn't criticise my parenting" or worst then one can say what they feel but know there is a risk in getting involved with someone about how they care for their children.
Now I did this once, I noticed something, I didn't say anything but I wrote a note, when I was leaving I passed by and said "excuse me you dropped this piece of paper" and walked away. If the person read it and understood it great if not then oh well, there is no evidence I wrote it, I was just the person who found it.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
I don't talk to people about their parenting. I see a lot of bad parenting riding the trains in nyc. No one says anything. People are crazy and unpredictable.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
I've wanted to say a lot of things, but I rarely do.
I have called DCF on people for not having carseats, and I will say something if people are endangering their children.
oh, and I once warned a woman, she was NIP at a resturant, and some guy was jacking off across the room, under the table.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
^^^ What does "NIP" mean?
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
oh god i think nip might mean nursing in public oh god i hope i am wrong
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Nursing in public. The guy is an ass but what can you do.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
krchab99
oh god i think nip might mean nursing in public oh god i hope i am wrong
yep, nursing in public.
ya, i seriously almost died! I hope he got kicked out, I don't know, I only noticed and told her on the way out.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Something like that is completely different, that is in no way the parenting.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
iseestars
Personally, in that incident, no, I would not say something to the parents. They know their kid is wearing that and all it'll do is offend the parents and start an arguement. The only way I'd ever say something is if I was a friend of the parent.
Not necessarily disagreeing with you, but how are people supposed to know something is not appropriate if there is no societal shame?
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mr Hyde
How appropriate/inappropriate is it to comment to people when they are doing something that is clearly bad parenting?
In Darcy's example...is it ok to approach the parents of the 9 year old girl wearing a t-shirt that says "I'm in your boyfriend's Top 8" and say something like "Do you know what that t-shirt means?"
In my opinion, if you know for certain, that is to say, without a doubt that what is going on is bad parenting....and you can honestly say that the child will in no uncertain terms be harmed over the course of their life by this bad parenting...and further, that you know without a shadow of a doubt that your intervention at this time will result in a net positive benefit in that childs future life, and won't in fact result in a negative, shitty scene which will scar everyone involved.....then, well...I still don't know.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
Lola Rose
I've wanted to say a lot of things, but I rarely do.
I have called DCF on people for not having carseats, and I will say something if people are endangering their children.
Same here. I won't say or do anything unless the child is in obvious danger. Once I called the police dept when I was stopped at a red light and noticed that a family in a van the next lane over was driving along. The person sitting in the front passenger side was holding a baby in their lap. I got their license plate number and called the police. Difficult to tell if it was just bad parenting, plain ignorance, or (God forbid) a kidnapping. But I hope they got that baby a carseat.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
I've seen many shameful examples of bad parenting but I wouldn't say anything unless their kid did something to directly piss me off.
I almost said something once when this woman breast fed this old kid at a shopping centre food court. It put me off my lunch. The child ate McDonalds and then washed it down with some breast milk. It was the most disgusting thing ever. I seriously felt like punching her.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
jaizaine
I almost said something once when this woman breast fed this old kid at a shopping centre food court. It put me off my lunch. The child ate McDonalds and then washed it down with some breast milk. It was the most disgusting thing ever. I seriously felt like punching her.
wow.. that's a pretty extreme reaction on your part. I was breastfed till well over 2, and my mom still nursed me where ever she happened to be. I'm glad no one punched her! ::)
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
Lola Rose
wow.. that's a pretty extreme reaction on your part. I was breastfed till well over 2, and my mom still nursed me where ever she happened to be. I'm glad no one punched her! ::)
Right? Like damn! My daughter ate McDonalds when she was two and yes, I would let her wash it down with breastmilk. No matter where we were. What about that is disgusting?
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
jaizaine
I've seen many shameful examples of bad parenting but I wouldn't say anything unless their kid did something to directly piss me off.
I almost said something once when this woman breast fed this old kid at a shopping centre food court. It put me off my lunch. The child ate McDonalds and then washed it down with some breast milk. It was the most disgusting thing ever. I seriously felt like punching her.
How old was the kid? was this in Australia? Did you know what the average age for breastfeeding is? I wish it was me breastfeeding the kid and how I wish you would of punched me to see what would happen.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Just so you know the average age for natural weaning is 4.5 years.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
Mr Hyde
Not necessarily disagreeing with you, but how are people supposed to know something is not appropriate if there is no societal shame?
Maybe they don't but I wouldn't want to make it my business incase they want to get argumentive. Personally, I wouldn't let any daughters that I have wear shirts that said slutty slogans but the tween stores are selling them and it is becoming fashionable. On the other point now that I think of this example, my grandmother, who is in her late 80's, took my cousins shopping and bought them a bunch of shirts with those kind of slutty undertone phrases on them, honestly having no idea what they meant. lol. My aunt saw them and returned them but I think it's more up to a friend or family member than a stranger to point out what's they think is socially acceptable.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
Miss_Luscious
Right? Like damn! My daughter ate McDonalds when she was two and yes, I would let her wash it down with breastmilk. No matter where we were. What about that is disgusting?
I see it as ironic. Breastfeeding to 2 yrs seems like it'd be done for health reasons but McDonald's is so anti-anti-healthy. :D
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Originally Posted by
ahmeerah
I see it as ironic. Breastfeeding to 2 yrs seems like it'd be done for health reasons but McDonald's is so anti-anti-healthy. :D
Heh, that's true. She liked the fries!
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Um she wasn't 2 she was about 10 - hence I said child not toddler.
I wouldn't actually punch anyone, Im not violent but it was disturbing and disgusting.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
^^
yeh I know. shit i've got nothing against breast feeding publicly or anything I'm not one of those who thinks it's disgusting it's natural. But that's what I meant in my post about an old kid. I had just never seen anything like that before. I would have thought it would be embarrassing for the kid.
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Re: Darcy's thread got me thinking...
Yeah I don't really thing Vajaijai meant she'd LITERALLY punch someone. But haven't you ever felt so ill by a parent's "parenting" (term used loosely) that you kinda did wanna slap some sense into them?