I'm curious - who do you think is more true to themselves - people who are in front of you....or people online? Who's more honest with you and themselves?
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I'm curious - who do you think is more true to themselves - people who are in front of you....or people online? Who's more honest with you and themselves?
I think liars fib no matter if they're in your face or across the world on their laptop. I think sometimes it's easier to admit the truth to people who you'll never see, but I've known a few people who couldn't care less that they're lying straight to your face. :shrug: I don't feel qualified to vote.
Depends on what part of the online world we're talking about. Most forums and message boards I notice are pretty chill. There's a little bit more anonyminity in being an avatar, and I think that allows people to feel somewhat more comfortable. It seems to me that it starts to get a little fuzzy though on rating/social networking/profile sites. I've noticed that some people market themselves as being perfect and having this fantasy lifestyle, free of problems or obstacles. I don't really see too often where people will post in their profile how their dealing with their parents' marital issues or the pregnancy scare they had a month ago. It's more about the lavish lifestyle, and party pics (which is great and all). So it could be dishonesty or just simply selective omission.
As for real life? Same deal. The person who presents themselves professionally at the workplace can also be the same party animal on the weekends. People are chameleons for all seasons.
Fuck you all. I choose my kitty. Treat would never lie to me. :snooty:
I kid, I kid! (about the fuck you all part) Sort of. :P
Ok, seriously though, it just depends on the person. I like to take everyone's opinions into some sort of consideration, but trust the honesty (as much as I am able to) of only a select few whom I know personally... and maybe 2 SW'ers. I only say maybe because I have never had a chance to be around them IRL.
LOL and the cats have the lead by a longshot!
The Cats. I am warm furniture and three meals a day to them.
Add me to the kitty cat/puppy list.
I'm voting kitty!
Having just spent the evening with some very honest and real friends, including phillyVixen, my conclusion is that the folks I choose to surround myself with are great ppl. They will not lie to me the way folks online will.
Sure, at some point we've had an IRL friend lie to us, but for ME it seems that I have a good choice in real, genuine folk, who will call it like they see it and not lie to make you feel better or worse.
Edit (can't on BlackBerry): ...have made good choices in who I'm friends with, those who are real genuine...
Also, I voted IRL but I don't think everyone online lies. Some for sure but not all.
The kanji in my avatar actually mean "Truth" in 3 languages (Japanese, Chinese & Korean), and the same symbol is tattooed on my forearm as a constant reminder of how important honesty is, wherever I go. IMO, whether they're online or in front of you, a person's capacity to be honest with themselves determines their ability to be "true to themselves" and genuine with others.
I believe that honesty is the purest game in the world because the absence of lies promotes a parallel absence of fear that opens us to the possibility of ego-free communication and learning. Only a person who is unflinchingly honest about their failures, their weaknesses and their strengths==100% of the time--can walk through life unapologetically. Anybody on SW who rolls that way, please PM me; I could use your wisdom... ;)
I think people lie on-line and in person
Eh, I voted for cats. They're true. I am pretty much the same guy online and off, as many of you can attest. I don't understand the lying part, honestly. Is it supposed to be impressive? Does anyone care that much?
I was going to pick the last option, but I have chinchillas, not dogs and cats! :P
qft!
ditto qft!
y'know budai? i've been meaning to get another tat.
my last tat is the chinese character "de" ( 德 ). it means righteousness, morality, and a slew of other things that really doesn't translate exactly well in single-word western concepts. imo, it's more 'living your life correctly' and having 'inner strength-type' of stuff, without the 'holier than thou attitude'. it also just happens to be my personal chinese name. ;)
like i said, i had been thinking of getting another tat but i really couldn't decide on one appropriate to/for me.
but i think i've found it now after reading your post. thanks! :)
I wish I could pick the third option but my dog died and I dont have another one yet :(
I think people can lie either in person or online.
On one hand due to the anonymity people can often disclose a lot more than they would in person. On the other hand this anonymity also allows people to be whoever they want to be and develop more elaborate lies.
Either way, I often disclose more on sw than I would to people face to face. This is because I find it less judgmental here and also because typing out something is easier for me than having a conversation. I have become more relusive since I've been dancing.
I come here with a fake name, and you look to me for truth? Gosh, I hope not.
Can you imagine how much further we'd be advanced as a species if we looked at other things and ourselves honestly and portrayed other things and ourselves honestly?
Chrissy nailed it. The friends that I choose, I trust to be truthful.
While South Korea may still teach that as part of its hanja (Korean description of the Chinese pictrogram-based written language, which is called kanji in Japanese) as a bow to the Sino legacy, my understanding is that hanja is not considered to be Korean. It's Chinese that is taught in South Korea. (The retooling of the Korean writing system in the 15th Century is a rather fascinating story.)
I'm sorry. I don't mean to demean the meaning of your tatoo, and I think it's a fine gesture. I'm just relating the truth as I see it.
But how can you tell if they're telling you the truth?Quote:
Only a person who is unflinchingly honest about their failures, their weaknesses and their strengths==100% of the time--can walk through life unapologetically. Anybody on SW who rolls that way, please PM me; I could use your wisdom... ;)
Kitties. Hands down.
Truth or Beauty?
It's a philosophical question I often ask in the POTW thread.
Most people who've studied philosophy immediate choose "beauty," because "truth" in purest form is almost impossible to achieve. Even scientific principles we accept at the closest thing to truth are really just convenient instruments that can be overturned in a single experiment.
Also, far more damage has been done to people over time by psychotic power-hungry monsters' attempts to inflict their own interpretation of "truth" on the weak, defenseless or innocent.
Anyway, my online and real lives intersect on so many levels that I couldn't begin to untangle them. And I really wouldn't want to.
While it's true I choose my friends IRL, I adopt a huge number of friends -- even acquaintances -- online. My online relationships can be so enormously powerful that they often drive events in my real life. How cool is that?:)
I believe people are often far more revealing and far less deceptive online, at least with SW. It's the perception of anonymity that is partly responsible for this, along with the immediacy and warmth from a supportive subculture -- itself an unwillingly misunderstood target of the larger culture. This is the philosophy behind the "safe haven" status for dancers we seek to achieve on the site.
Oh, and I am hopelessly in love with both cats and dogs (cats have an edge) but I have to wonder if the feeling is always reciprocated for any of us.
The New Yorker ran a cartoon some years ago that consisted of a drawing of a woman gazing lovingly at her cat, and the cat returning the gaze. In the woman's thought balloon was an image of her holding the cat in loving warmth. The cat's thought balloon just contained a can of cat food. :-\
^^^
Heheh, cat food.
I know for myself personally, I have never been a member of any online group but this one and one for ED support....
I feel that the people in this forum and at the time I was in the other one can relate to me more than some friends in real life... we have a common experience (dancing, or EDs in the other case) that many of my friends IRL don't have.
In that regard, I can be more honest online because I know I am talking to other people who will understand and who have been through similar experiences to mine.
While you guys can't literally reach out and hug me, I do feel that your support is a valuable and important part of my life, which may sound weird... but that's really how I feel.
I voted for the Kitties. My 2 little girls are completely guileless with me.
Second to that, I find it easier to hit it up well with people online than people in person. I have met most of my last several fuck buddies online as well as non fuck friends. I am considered rather weird by people IRL and most people just "don't get" me. People often form conclsions about me IRL that are almost always completely untrue while I feel that it is easier for people on the net to see me as a multidimensional person. (People IRL either see me as a sex crazed party girl or nerd. When they see that I am actually both of those things and THEN SOME they can't reconcile the fact.)
Kitties. All non-human animals in general.
People lie all the time. Some choose to use the internet as a means for their "real" self to come out. However, the there is only one self, with many different identities. The internet persona is just one more identity we use (whether consciously or unconsciously).
The way that people on this site alone kiss-ass is proof that plenty of people on the internet lie more than they would in real life.