How do you deal with jealous girls?
I am making top sales now and it seems to be getting worse I avoid the dressing room and stick to myself but lately this one girl who used to be a top girl has been following me around and looking for any chance she can get to start drama I'm having a had a hard time ignoring her tonight any suggestions would help. xoxo
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
What are you doing that's making her miss out on her own money to follow you around? Have you talked to management about this? I suggest you just keep doing what you've been doing (ie. making money honey!) and not worry about her.
Personally, I like jealous dancers. Their fuel to the fire gives me my energy to make more money..they are my motivation! lol...
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
This was one of my biggest problems when I was dancing, and I wasn't even a "top earner" I mean I did o.k., but I never understood the raging jealousy I faced.
Sometimes I guess all you have to do is be pretty and have a cute butt.
I also just ignored, ignored, ignored. They still would keep on though.
I had a girl at one club that would harass me so bad I wouldn't even want to come in.
Depending on how your management is, maybe say something. Some management will back you and take it seriously and some just don't give a flying fuck at all.
It really depends on the club.
I guess the best thing I can tell you is to not react. Just keep acting like they don;t exist. They'll either burn themselves out, eventually give up and move on to another girl....or....persist to the point they are actually physically confronting you (which I hope NOT)
Congrats on being a top earner, especially right now when most of us aren't doing so good. SAVE that money, girl!!!!
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
Tell the management and bouncers about it. If the management just ignore it get a good bouncer on your side. I agree that the best thing to do is not react. This has been studied with school age bullies that they try to do everything to get provocation. That girl will probably have a very short term memory and you can get away with it.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
This sounds bad but jealous girls fuel my desire to outperform and increase my money. Besides, why should anyone apologize for actually doing well in a tough business? It's not like that in any other job and this one is no different to me.
I think if they all knew that then they would shut up and just do their jobs, get their butts off the bar and stop complaining. :)
I just have enough in my life and don't need the bullshit drama that goes on in the DR. I make my money then I leave ~ it's nothing against anyone else, it's just they way I personally do better. Back in the 'old days' when I was trying to be friends with everyone and it was backfiring, constantly apologizing for my good money nights, with fights and tears and a ton of misery I wasn't making jack.
Most girls think I am stuck up and all but that's okay, I know that if they knew me they would see differently, but I don't have the energy to deal with it. I shifted my focus inward and now I could give a rip if anyone likes me or not.
Wow, yep that sounds terrible! But hey, it works for me.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
^^^I'm the exact same way. I go to work to make money, not friends. There's a few girls at work I'm cool with and I'm nice to everyone but I'm rarely, if ever, in the dressing room. The floor is where the money's at, so that's where I am 99% of the time. :)
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
virgoamm
^^^I'm the exact same way. I go to work to make money, not friends. There's a few girls at work I'm cool with and I'm nice to everyone but I'm rarely, if ever, in the dressing room. The floor is where the money's at, so that's where I am 99% of the time. :)
Me too. It's funny...sometimes when I go to work, I get girls who are like, "so are you new?" I just smile and say, "nope been here almost 2yrs. I stay out of the dressing room, and out of drama..thats why you don't know me" :)
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
Hmmm, its tough being the best. Just don't give her anything to feed off of. Other than that I don't know what to tell ya.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
I'd "get on the record" with management about this issue. Please don't resort to "self help" in dealing with her, as she's obviously trying to provoke you into doing exactly just that.
If something does go haywire and you wind up looking like the bad guy, you'll want management to know problems didn't start with you, especially if you get set up somehow.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
its lonely at the top but its quite a nice view ;)
im usually too busy to notice if anyone is hating on me.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
Sorry, that sucks. I agree w/just ignoring. Also, make sure to watch your back...lock up ALL of your stuff if you don't already, if she goes on stage before you and you don't clean the pole, make sure that it isn't greased up...etc.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
When other dancers are jealous it just shows that you doing something right. Keep your chin up and try not to let a jealous chic drag you down to her level. I know easier said than done but I promise it does get easier with practice.
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
I can't play dumb with guys but I can play dumb like a motherfucker when it comes to other girls.
I ignore the cattiness, but when it's obviously directed at me, I'm just like "whaa---? meee????"
Re: How do you deal with jealous girls?
You guys are awesome, the advice totally helped. I wish all girls could be like this. I went to management today and they talked with her. She apologized and was really nice the rest of the night. I was trying to avoid management because I didn't want to be a tattle tale but it was definetly only going to get worse if I didn't. I agree on the whole needing to save my money thing I've had some luck because I work all the time but buisness is getting slower and slower. Hard times are definetly on the way and I'm sure a lot more jealousy will follow. thanks again xoxo