The hippie skirt of death
Or, why I shouldn't ever be allowed to touch a sewing machine. Ever.
So I feel like some hippie skirts, right? They're my summer wardrobe every year. In a fit of insanity I feel all Suzy Homemaker and decide to MAKE one.
SO I get a pattern: and go check out.
But apparently patterns have sizes. And it would be okay if I was roughly 247 pounds, but I'm not. I have the wrong size. So I go back. Get the right size.
I unfold the pattern and cut the paper peices out. Then I realize you have to be some sort of wierd mathmatical engineer to do this right. They give you piece 1,2,3,4, and 5 in paper, right? But the picture shows you folding the fabric up and somehow laying two of everything in these tiny tight little ways and cutting them out. I don't have two of everything. Damn.
So I do some math and figure I need four of everything. So I lay the fabric flat and do that. It takes roughly two hours and a lot of caffiene but I do it.
Then I find out that you really need pins to do this right. Fail. I get along as best I can.
Then I find out that you have to cut the notches in the pattern out, not in. Fail again.
So I look at the directions and find out that you can't just whip the thing together, no. There's basting and nap and selvages and grain and seam allowances. (Btw, seam allowances? Why isn't that built into the pattern? Why did no one tell me this FIRST?) And you sew from notch b to notch c but not between the small circles and you go around the left circle and do the hokey pokey to the sewing gods.
THEN I find out that my sewing machine has to be "threaded". Oh, God, this is some kind of torture. Thank God for youtube. So I thread it.
And then I stick the fabric in. And then I push the pedal. And nothing happens.
It moves, but no stitches. WTF? So I google and fix the tension. Then it sews, but it stops. And gets stuck. And makes an angry noise. And somehow the top thread is all wound up around the thread in the bottom bobbin dealy. And so I take it out.
And rethread it. And do it again. And it gets stuck so bad that I can't get it out. So I yank it out and somehow the top thread is all wrapped around the bobbin. Like five feet of it. And my stitches are . . . broken somehow.
My "Sew Easy" two hour skirt has taken me a total of 13 hours and it's still not done. The pattern peices are cut. They are in a bag. My sewing machine is under the table probably broken beyond belief.
*headdesk* Fail.
Re: The hippie skirt of death
Do you know anyone who sews who can walk you through it? That's what I'd like to do when I get my sewing machine. You just have to practice, you'll get the hang of it!
Re: The hippie skirt of death
Oh, I'm so sorry:'(. I know that trying something for the first time can be frustrating. Can you go back and try something a little easier to get the feel of working with patterns? Like pillow cases or curtains/ drapes?
My first sewing project (when I was in 9th grade) was a bathing suit. I thought, "Well, it's not very big, how hard can it be?" Ha! When making a bathing suit, you have to be very precise or the damn thing just won't fit. So after that fiasco my mom set me up to make some drawstring purses, and that turned out much better. We made them out of old jeans and they actually turned out pretty cute.
Since I had some success with that second project, I wasn't as discouraged and went on to make a lot of stuff. I even made some bridesmaids dresses for one friend and one wedding dress (never again! Gah! Brides are the WORST!).
Re: The hippie skirt of death
Re: The hippie skirt of death
I'm gonna try again. I just sucked. LOL.
Re: The hippie skirt of death
Blech, patterns and sewing machines FTL! I hate, hate, HATE all that crap. People have been hand sewing without patterns for millenia, I prefer to kick it old skool.
My technique is to find something I wanna make, eyeball it untill I've figured it out completely, go piece by piece by piece, and finally voila, I have whatever I wanted! I've been hand-sewing without patterns since I was a kid and have made everything from little handbags to fancy schmancy work clothes all without patterns or machines.
Besides, following somebody elses pattern defeats the point of making your own clothes. If I wanna buy something sombody else designed, it better already be made.
Re: The hippie skirt of death
I'm so sorry about your frustration but this made me LOL. Girl, read that pattern before you makeit. And yes, pins are useful when sewing, as are scissors. awwww. I hope you have better luck soon!
Re: The hippie skirt of death
I hope it gets better. You're not alone, though: everything remotely associated with sewing, knitting, etc. that I touch ends up looking like a parody of what was intended.
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Well, when you're done its going to be really cute!
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Wow, you are very patient I would have given up right after I got the wrong size.
Re: The hippie skirt of death
ROFL. ^ I almost did.
I'm just gonna wing it. And even if it looks dumb, I'll rock it and say it's designer if people are cunty. LOL.
"Bitch, don't you know who this IS?" LOL.
Re: The hippie skirt of death
LOL, me too. I finally gave up on sewing machines, straight lines, and patterns. Now I just cut things up and sew them together. It's a hippie skirt, it doesn't need to have straight lines. :-)
Re: The hippie skirt of death
That pattern should have a seam allowance built in. Only vogue still doesn't do it... but for the record the seam allowance is also the same width as your measuring tape... so just run the width of it along your pattern and follow that.
Also, you don't need to make four of everything, just cut one out and then place it again and cut another.
Also, only pin the fabric when you want to start sewing. Pinning the pattern to the fabric causes puckering, so to keep the pattern in place I recommend using weights like stones or (my favourite) the metal things that keep verticle blinds hanging down.